


Trial and Error

by xdark_blue



Series: our name, infinite, means limitless ♡ [1]
Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Boys In Love, Getting Together, Infinite Being Bros, M/M, Miscommunication, OT7 feels, Pining, Self Confidence Issues, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, idol!verse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-17
Updated: 2017-06-26
Packaged: 2018-10-20 03:09:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 107,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10653669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xdark_blue/pseuds/xdark_blue
Summary: His heart belonged to Sunggyu, and the stupid leader didn’t even know it. Tired of being just a friend, Woohyun is desperate for Sunggyu to just notice his feelings.





	1. the time i tried...

Sunggyu and I have been together for 3 years. Well, not together _together_ in the way I wanted, but as best friends. We met as trainees, and things were awkward at first. We became part of this thing called Infinite, and we were going to try to make it. We saw each other as rivals since we both knew that we had the best voices out of the seven members.  There was a period of time when things were uncertain, and people weren’t sure what role they were supposed to play. Sunggyu was always so serious, always practicing the most out of everyone. I would try to get closer to him, but he shrugged me off. I could literally feel the tension around him during the beginning. We would go into the studio and our managers would make us sing the same song. Sometimes they would even make us sing the same line, one right after the other. It was obvious that they were trying to decide whose sound they enjoyed more. And of course I wanted to win. I was young and eager, and I hadn’t tasted the spotlight. But I didn’t want to take anything away from Sunggyu. They pushed us against one another, but not in the way that I wanted.

 

Eventually things fell into place and we debuted. Sunggyu became our leader and I became main vocal. Instead of our voices battling, they began to harmonize. Why did it take so long for others to notice just how beautiful we sounded together? I think that Sunggyu felt more secure with his place in the group, so he began to open up to me. We actually became friends, and confided in each other. He told me how stressed he felt, but how it was worth it because he was doing something he loved. I became his crutch, something he could lean on when times were hard. And I loved it.

 

We tried hard to stand out. There were so many groups, so many idols for fans to choose from. We started filming variety shows, trying to give fans a glimpse of our personalities that we couldn’t show through our music. Sunggyu became the grandpa, the constantly tired leader from looking after his six little members. He took on his role with a smile, and constantly played up to his image. I became, well the name sounds a little silly but the fans called me Namgrease. I was responsible for about 90% of fanservice that came from our group. I constantly threw out hearts no matter where we were. I called the fans, the Inspirits, my girlfriends. I told them I only had eyes for them. I gave them skinship at all the events with all the members. A little touch on the hip, a hand on the shoulder, or a hug while someone else was talking. All little moments that could be taken in a different way. And eventually it did.

 

I remember the first time I heard the term Woogyu. We were backstage before a live performance, getting the finishing touches on our hair and makeup. I was already finished, so I was messing around with the other members. After failing with Sungjong (that kid did not play around when it came to makeup time), I set my sights on our leader.

 

After making eye contact with him in the mirror, I sauntered over to him. I playfully put my arms around him, “You trying to impress me honey? You know I see you first thing in the morning?” I said with a sly smile. He threw me one of signature glares as a response.

“You didn’t let me finish! I was going to say that you look beautiful no matter what time of day it is.” I finished with a wink.

The stylist noona couldn’t suppress her giggles, “That’s Woogyu for you! Way over the top and greasy!”

“Woogyu?!” I questioned slightly confused.

“Yeah, you and Sunggyu. Woogyu. All the fans are crazy about it. Haven’t you ever looked online? You guys totally have a lot of cute moments together! It’s only natural that people started to pair you up!”

 

At the time we both just laughed it off. Skinship was part of being an idol, giving fans a little something to think about. After the “yadong” incident during Sesame Player filming I wondered if they would ask me to do something similar, but nothing ever really came up. I was surprised at the noona’s knowing tone. It was as if I was the silly one for doubting such a thing’s existence. _Of course you would be paired with Sunggyu._ Was it because we were roommates? Close in age? Maybe it was because we were the main vocals? But something in the look in her eyes bothered me.  
  
  


I tried not to think about it too much, to go on with everything as normal. Sunggyu certainly did. But I couldn’t help that nagging voice in the back of my head. _Curiosity_.  What “moments” could there possibly be of the two of us? I waited until I knew Sunggyu would be busy with schedules, so that I wouldn’t be disturbed. I opened up my laptop and started to type. _This is ridiculous. You are seriously googling a fake coupling of you and your bandmate right now. You are losing your mind._ And yet, even though all those thoughts were going through my head, my desire to know more won over. I pressed the search button.

 

I used to think that I showed love to all of the members. Because I did love them, what we had in Infinite was definitely special. All of my relationships with the members were real. We genuinely cared about one another and were good friends. Though we all met and were forced to spend time together because of Infinite, our relationships grew past the point of just business. I did skinship with all of them, and I did not show preference. Or so I thought. I even searched me plus each member to confirm my thoughts. While I did have little moments with the other members, it was nothing compared to Sunggyu. There were whole blogs dedicated to us. Fancams, videos, playlists you name it, Sunggyu and I had it. Did I gravitate to him subconsciously? Did I seriously stare at him like a doe eyed girl every single time he talked in an interview? Did I always move into a position where I would be close to him? A certain caption caught my eye. The person that had shared it online commented, _“Even when his Woohyunnie isn’t around he is still all he thinks about! How many times does he praise him in this interview? Woogyu fighting! <3”_. It was a solo interview Sunggyu had done when promoting his Another Me album. I had never seen it before. There was no way I _couldn’t_ watch it. I started to wondered just what Sunggyu had said to others about me when I wasn’t with him. I had no idea just how hard his words would hit my heart.

 

_He’s a roommate worth 100 points who supports me no matter what I do. Woohyun is someone who is always caring towards fans. Towards our members he is someone who would always take care of us, a very warm hearted person. Please unstress yourself so that you could remain the joyful person you always were, let’s work together happily! My favorite song is Beautiful, because Woohyun wrote it. Baby my love beautiful. The song is describing the beauty of our love/relationship, I hope everyone will like it._

 

I sat there for a few minutes in a daze. My stomach felt kind of strange, and I clutched my chest. _Why does my heart feel funny? Why do I feel so happy?_ I knew hyung respected me but this felt like another level. This felt different, special. Why was I so happy to know that he talked about me to other people?! I started to get angry with myself, because the whole situation was stupid! One stupid stylist tells me that fans ship me with Sunggyu and suddenly after researching online my heart goes a flutter? It was ridiculous! _So why couldn’t I stop smiling?_

 

Then a crazy thought entered my head. If there were all these works dedicated to us, there had to be fanfiction. I had never read it before or given it much thought. One time I went to tell Myungsoo something and found him and Sungyeol dying of laughter in front of his laptop. When I questioned them about what was so funny, they simply said fanfiction. They later explained that it was funny to see how other people wrote about them, but I wasn’t curious enough to look. Now, I had to look. I started to read these scenarios of him and I together. Like _together._ My mind was going into overdrive.

 

_Sunggyu traced his fingers down Woohyun’s jawline, his thumb forcing his lips apart. “You’ve been a naughty boy, haven’t you? You want to be punished like the whore that you are?”_

_“Yes, hyung. Please I need you.” Woohyun gasped, letting his tongue slide around Sunggyu's thumb. He wanted a very different part of Sunggyu inside him, and he wanted it now._

_Sunggyu moved his hands to Woohyun’s shoulders, pushing him down to his knees. “Learn your place. I want you to suck my cock, and if you do a good enough job I might just fuck you.”_

 

Holy shit. I shut my laptop immediately, looking around frantically. _No one is home, duh._ Then why did I feel like my hair was standing on end? Why was I acting like I had gotten caught? I shook my head, hoping that would clear the now rampant dirty thoughts running though it. But it didn’t. My pants suddenly felt too tight and thoughts of Sunggyu ordering me to do things like _that_ to him… it was too much. I slowly lifted the screen again, curiosity winning out.

 

_“I want to hyung, but my hands…” Woohyun gestured to the handcuffs holding his arms behind his back.  
“Use your mouth.” Sunggyu ordered with no sympathy. “And I suggest you start moving with a little more urgency. My cock isn’t going to take care of itself. “_

_Woohyun shifted closer to him, using his teeth to pull at the jeans, to ease the zipper all the way down. He was excited and nervous, and he wanted so badly to be forgiven. When he finally got to what he wanted, he instantly deep throated him._

_Sunggyu let out a grunt and grabbed the back of Woohyun’s head, tangling his fingers in the long dark locks as Woohyun consistently bobbed up and down his length. “You are so desperate for me. Just look at the way your body accepts me. Even on the most basic of levels your body knows who it belongs to.” He wrenched Woohyun’s head back off his cock, forcing him to make eye contact with him. Woohyun made the most delicious picture naked on his knees, eyes big and wide, chest heaving, mouth still open and wet with a trail of saliva dripping down his chin. “Tell me what you want.”_

_“To please you. Anything you want. Anywhere you want. Please just give me your cock hyung. Please.”_

_Sunggyu smirked, pushing his head forward, the momentum making Woohyun fall onto his stomach harshly. “Tonight I will teach you to be careful what you wish for.”_

 

I closed the screen. I wasn’t ready for… that. But I couldn’t deny what was happening to my body. I was turned on. By the thought of Sunggyu fucking me. And it wasn’t because I was deprived or starved for attention. It was because it was _him._ I got up and walked to the door, making sure the lock was still secure. I went back to my bed and laid down, letting my instincts take over. I unbuttoned my jeans and pulled down the zipper hastily. I began to fist himself, my other hand in front of my mouth trying to cover my moans. My thoughts were running wild, the stupid fic giving me inspiration in ways I did not even realize. As I worked myself I couldn’t help but think of him. _What if these weren't my hands? What if they were Sunggyu’s hands? Would they feel rough? Would he know how to handle me? Would he want to please me? Would he kiss me as he worked my cock?_

 

With that thought, I came. Something about visualizing our lips colliding, the feeling of those plump lips on mine did it for me. Not as an accident like on Couple's Game, but a real legitimate kiss. I laid there for a minute just panting, smiling stupidly to myself. I felt _great._ Then this horrible thing called reality crashed down upon me. Now I had officially crossed that line. Before joining Infinite I had imagined boys and girls, but I never gave it much thought. I never labeled myself as any orientation. Then Infinite happened and of course I was straight, and of course I had tons of girls because that’s what everyone thought about me. In reality no one in the group even had time to date anyone, so I pushed it all to the back of my mind. But now, _now_ I had just jacked off to the thought of my bandmate, leader, hyung, roommate, _best friend._ And there is no going back from something like that.

 

But life isn’t a movie, or a fairytale. Sunggyu didn’t come home that night and declare his love for me. Everything went on as normal. _It was the most frustrating thing in the entire world._ My focus had changed; my world had shifted towards him. I thought about him all the time. I got excited when he would come home. I would pretend I wanted to practice vocals just so we would have an excuse to be together. Suddenly our relationship didn’t feel like _enough._ I needed his attention, hell I craved it. Skinship wasn’t enough because it wasn’t real. Something had to change between us, and I knew I would have to be the one to initiate it. The only problem? I had no idea where to start.

 

* * *

  
A/N: My inspiration for dominatrix Gyu.  



	2. subtlety

The days started to feel like a blur. We were constantly busy with schedules, and I barely had anytime alone. Which was a good thing, because anytime I had alone was spent thinking about a certain someone. Sunggyu. After that fateful day, _and the best orgasm of my life,_ I couldn’t look at him the same. He had this aura about him now that constantly drew my attention. I started to over analyze all of our interactions, wondering if there was something hidden beneath the surface. Maybe he liked me too, but just didn’t know how to express it?

 

I knew I was being entirely too optimistic. The chances of him feeling the same way about me were very slim. _But what about all the stuff you found online? All those nice things he said about you? He didn’t say that about the other members. It has to mean something._ I buried my head in my hands. It seemed like all I did everyday was have an internal battle within my mind. Does Sunggyu love me or not?

 

But if there was one thing I hated in this world, it was limbo. The whole uncertainty of our relationship was driving me crazy. I had to do something and I had to do it now. I couldn’t continue on this way, reading into every interaction we had, hoping that he would approach me anytime we had a break. I wanted more of him, and I wanted him to want more of me.

 

We had a photoshoot scheduled for today. I personally disliked photoshoots, because I felt that I was more impressive in person. I had a hard time connecting with the camera, and I always felt awkward trying to exude whatever expression the photographer wanted. I preferred being able to connect with fans in videos or interviews, _after all I couldn’t exactly throw hearts in a still image could I?_ Sunggyu, however, was the opposite. He almost always had one of the top individual pictures at the end of a shoot. The way he communicated with his eyes, his expressions.. It was hard to handle. _An effect I didn’t fully comprehend until I was looking at his different spreads online. And seriously, why did he always result to the come hither look? With his mouth slightly opened and his eyes full of lust as he gazed down upon the camera.. Fans agreed that his “o” face was the stuff of legend. Damn the Internet._

 

But maybe I could use this to my advantage? I feel like Sunggyu isn’t one who likes surprises, so I couldn’t exactly just waltz up to him and declare my undeniably growing desire for him. No, I would need to be more subtle, ease him into the idea of me in _that_ way. The schedule today provided too many opportunities, and I wasn’t going to pass it up. _Here goes nothing._

 

We had finally arrived at the location after what felt like an eternity. I seated myself next to Sunggyu in the van, and I made sure to brush against him more than once blaming it on the driver’s swerving. I caught him glance at me more than once, but ultimately his focus was on the music playing through his headphones. _Damn._

 

We were gathered inside what appeared to be a warehouse, listening to the photographer explain the concept for the shoot. My attention was wavering, my eyes kept leaving the photographer to stare at Sunggyu, who was enthusiastically nodding at the concept, apparently pleased with whatever we were doing. We were about to break for hair and make-up when an idea popped into my head.

 

“Will we be doing any individual or pairing shots? Or will the focus be on the entire group?” I asked, my hopes slightly increasing.

“We won’t be doing any individuals, but I would like to break you guys up into pairings. Maybe 2, 2, and 3? We will play with it once you guys are ready for the camera.” Answered the photographer.

I watched the other guys start to make their way further into the building, but I stepped closer to the photographer.  
“If it’s alright with you, I would like to be paired with our leader, Sunggyu. In previous shoots we have worked together and the results have been good. I feel that our faces compliment one another.” I saw her glance behind me to look at him then back at me.  
“Yes, I think you are right. The two of you will look good together for this concept. We will discuss poses once you get changed.” She finished with a smile.

 

I went to catch up with the guys, happy that things were going my way. I made my way over to him, making sure to lean in more than necessary to tell him the update.

“Hyung, the photographer noona says that she would like us to pair up for the concept. She says that she thinks we look good together. Do you agree?” I stepped back to gauge his reaction.

He smiled, nodding his head in response. “Yes, I will be happy to work with you today Woohyun.”

“Once we get changed, I’d like to practice some poses together. Just the two of us. That way we will be prepared once it's our turn.” I called out to Sunggyu, who was nodding, already moving to talk to someone else.

 

My face fell a little bit as he walked away. Sure he said he was happy to work with me, but why did it feel forced? Maybe I was just overanalyzing again. We all finished our hair and make-up then made our way to the middle of the warehouse. We did our group shots, and everyone performed well. First up was Hoya, Dongwoo, and Sungjong for the pairings, so the rest of us went to take a break. Myungsoo and Sungyeol went off into their own little world, _like always,_ and I was finally alone with Sunggyu.

 

“Hyung, let’s find a mirror and practice. You know how photoshoots make me uncomfortable. I really want to do well today. Please?” I tugged at his sleeve, pouting up at him.

“Aish, alright. Just no goofing off, okay? This schedule today, W Magazine, it’s important. So let’s work hard alright?” He pulled me back over to the hair and make up area, and sat in front of the mirrors.

 

I sat next to him and set my plan into action. “Hyung, I feel like I have a hard time expressing myself. I don’t know how to communicate because I am just staring at the camera. You always look so confident, how do you do it?” I mentally high fived myself for my brilliance. Sunggyu loved giving advice, _aka being bossy,_ so I knew he wouldn’t pass by an opportunity to tell me how to do something.

 

He tapped his finger to his lips, thinking about how to answer me. He gazed at my reflection in the mirror, “The thing is you are thinking too literally. You have to forget about the fact that you are looking at a camera. Listen to what the concept the photographer is going for. Think of the expression, or the message you want to convey. Then try to show it as if you were with another person, not a camera.”

 

I turned both of our chairs so we were facing one another. “Show me. Pretend I’m the camera, and you convey the concept to me.”

“Okay, what expression should I do?”

“Lust.” I saw him hesitate. My mind suddenly processed what I was just said. I was going to try to ease into something my risqué, but apparently my subconscious had other plans. I tried to play it off, “Come on hyung. Aren’t you supposed to be a professional? Surely you could handle any expression.”

He looked at me strangely for a second, and then he closed his eyes. _Damn it, maybe I did go too far too quickly. Why didn’t I start with something easy and harmless like happiness? I should have…_

 

My thoughts immediately came to a halt because he had opened his eyes. And he was giving me a look. _That look._ Holy shit. I thought that he was closing his eyes in exasperation at my antics, but in reality he was just preparing to turn on his lust expression. How could one person be so sexy and _tempting_ all of the sudden? He was still staring at me with that face and I couldn’t take it anymore, I broke eye contact.

 

I cleared my throat, “Yeah, okay. That was good. Um, that was really believable.”

“You try. Give me the same expression.”

Oh dear Lord. When my brain dreamt up this idea, I envisioned maybe a few lingering touches or off handed remarks about sexy outfits. I was not prepared for “let’s sit super close together and undress each other with our eyes”. But when life gives you lemons, you make some god damn lemonade.

 

“Okay. This should be really easy with you as my inspiration.” I gave him one of my greasy winks, trying to calm down the atmosphere, _aka myself._ He rolled his eyes at me and waited. I closed my eyes and thought about that night, the way I felt, the way he made me feel. I thought about the Sunggyu from that story. _“You’ve been a naughty boy, haven’t you? Tonight I will teach you to be careful what you wish for.”_ A dominating Sunggyu was just so hot to think about and totally put me in the mood for a “lust gaze” so I definitely felt like I was ready so I opened my eyes.

 

When did my breathing become so heavy? I let my mouth fall open as I stared at him waiting for his reaction. _Can he feel through my gaze that I want him? Would he be shocked to know the true thoughts that are going through my mind?_  I felt myself begin to get hard, being this close to him and thinking such inappropriate thoughts. Sunggyu bit his lip, and cocked his head to the side evaluating me.

 

Then the moment ended. A stupid choding came out of nowhere, knocking into Sunggyu which forced him to break our eye contact. “Hyungs, photographer noona says its your turn. Why are you guys in here by yourself anyway?” I mentally cursed Sungyeol ten times over. “We will be in there in a second. We are just double checking ourselves.” I heard Sunggyu reply. Sungyeol shrugged and walked away, avoiding my death glare. “We should go.” Sunggyu called over his shoulder as he walked away from me. “But hyung! What did you think?”

 

He paused in his walk for a second. He turned his head over his shoulder to look back at me. “As you said, it was believable. I really felt your…. emotions.” He continued on his way, and I was left behind dumbfounded. My emotions?! What did that mean? Could he tell I was being serious about him being my inspiration? Did he find my gaze attractive? Was he just trying to be nice to avoid an awkward situation? I ran to catch up with him, trying to calm my thoughts.

 

As we began our shoot together, I could feel tension between us. He was making sure to keep a little distance between us. That wasn’t working for me. Now that I had him a little out of his comfort zone, I was going to push it. I slowly slid my body closer to his. He was posing on a staircase _with no escape from me._  I leaned forward with both of my hands on the railing around him, getting closer within his personal bubble. I saw the slight surprise in the way his eyes widened, then he simply got back into character. I stared down at him, challenging him. He met my gaze and I swear I could feel the air heat up around us.

 

“Got it! Thanks guys, that was great.” The photographer called out to us. I snapped back into reality and pushed off the staircase to put some distance between us. “Come take a quick look. It turned out really well.”

 

We made our way over to the monitor to see our results. I had to admit that she was right. Sunggyu was nonchalantly leaned back against the stairs; his eyes raised up to met my gaze. I was looking down upon him, towering over him way too close to be just friendly. The photo gave off a feeling of us challenging one another, neither willing to back down. It was very sensual to say the least. “The results are very good. Thanks noona.” Sunggyu smiled at her and left my side.

 

The van ride on the way home was a little strange. I was sitting next to him again when I heard Hoya call out to him. “Hyung, I saw your shots with Woohyun. They turned out very good, very enticing wouldn’t you say Dongwoo?” I heard that maniacal laugh ring through my ears. “Yes. Did the two of you forget you were in a room with other people? Those bedroom eyes were a little much.” He teased in response. I looked at Sunggyu, would he blush? Would he agree with them?

 

“Ah, you guys are silly. You know that it was only for the shoot. The fans will be pleased with the results, and that’s the only thing I care about.” Sunggyu stated, putting his headphones in effectively ending the conversation. I bit my lip, trying to fight the nauseous feeling rising up in my stomach. When I glanced up Hoya was staring at me with a knowing look that unnerved me. When we got home and the others went their separate ways he approached me. “Hyung, let’s talk in your room for a second.”

 

We walked into my room, and closed the door behind us for privacy. I looked at him questioningly, not really knowing what to expect.  
“Hyung, you can be honest with me. Do you have feelings for our leader?” My mouth fell open in shock. Hadn’t I been careful? I had been sure to keep my behavior towards him the same to avoid suspicion. “What? I mean of course I care about him, we are really close but I don’t want him in that way.” Hoya chuckled that deep chuckle of his and moved past me to lock the door. _Okay that’s ominous. Why is he looking at me like that?_

 

“Alright, if you say so let’s have a little test then.” I agreed semi-reluctantly, unsure of the direction this was going. “I want you to remember that feeling you had back at the photoshoot. We’ve just got home, and all the other members have went out. I want you to imagine that I’m Sunggyu hyung.” As he was talking he was backing us towards the door. I felt my back hit the hard surface and I squeaked in surprise, unable to move away from him. I looked up at him, he was the same height as Sunggyu. _This is stupid. Why did I even agree to this? I am not going to admit my feelings to Hoya pretending to be Sunggyu._

  
But then Hoya ran his fingertips along my hip bone and leaned down to whisper in my ear. “You have been naughty today Woohyun. Looking at me like that in front of all those people, and just leaving me hanging? I think you need to be punished.” I closed my eyes, forgetting for a second that I was randomly role playing with my platonic friend member. Coherent thoughts were starting to leave my brain. I abruptly changed our position and slammed Hoya’s stomach to the door, moving behind him. He had one hand steadying himself against the door, while I had the other pinned behind his back.

 

“I think you are forgetting something Sunggyu. You might be able to order me around out there but in _here,_ I am the one in charge.” Yes, I was sure that I would be the one taking the lead. When someone had so much responsibility during the day, I imagined it would be nice for them to be able to relax at night. Or maybe I just liked the idea of topping Sunggyu, who knows.

 

Hoya chuckled that evil chuckle again. “Is that so? Would you even know what to do with me if I gave you the chance?” I moved my hand to his hair, pulling his head back for a rough kiss. He met me eagerly, pushing back with force against me. I spun him around so I was facing him before attacking his lips again. He was clutching my sides, gripping my hips pushing our bodies flush together.

 

With my eyes closed it was easy to pretend that the jet-black hair was a caramel brown, that the fingers slowly working their way up my neck belonged to Sunggyu. I rolled my hips, pretending the delicious moan I heard in response came from the leader’s throat.

 

“So are you still going to pretend that you don’t want Sunggyu? Because the hard on between your legs is telling me a different story.” My eyes flew upon. Hoya breaking character brought me back to reality. He pushed me off his body, moving away from the doorway. He sauntered over to my bed, making himself comfortable before hitting my eyes with a confident smirk.  
  


My brain seemed to begin processing everything again. I had just made out with Hoya. _Hoya._ Who was willingly pretending to be Sunggyu. Which meant that he knew that I wanted Sunggyu. _What the fuck is happening?!_

 

Hoya chuckled again, reaching out to catch my hand and pull me down to the bed with him. “Hyung, do not be so stressed. I could tell you had feelings for Sunggyu. I could tell just by the way you look at him, and not just today at the photo shoot. I had a feeling that you were having a hard time admitting it, even to yourself, so I wanted to help you.” He smiled at me, and ran his finger against my plump lips.

  
“I had a feeling that you were uneasy because you didn’t have much experience with men. Was that your first time kissing a man?” I was embarrassed, ringing my hands together in my lap. But when I looked up at him, I could tell he was coming from an honest place. He was being such a good friend to me, and I was lucky to have someone that cared so much that they were willing to do this with me. I nodded shyly in response.

 

“Well how did you feel about it? Compared to when you kissed girls I mean.” My eyes looked down to my lap, eyeing the still present, uncomfortable bulge there. I saw Hoya’s eyes travel there as well and he chuckled. _Damn him and that chuckle._

 

“As much as I would like to help you out there hyung, I feel like I should save some of your firsts for Sunggyu. But the good thing you have learned is that you are legitimately attracted to men. It’s not just a fantasy in your head. So now the question is what are you going to do about it?”

 

“That’s the thing. I have no idea. I tried at the photoshoot today to be a little more forward with him then normal. But you heard him in the van! He didn’t think anything of it, he thought it was just for the fans. I’m so lost Hoya. I just want him to notice me, and I feel like it’s never going to happen.”  
  
  
He smiled at me reassuringly. “What, you got the courage to grab his attention for like one day? It’s way too soon to be in such despair. Today, you tried being subtle. And now you know that subtlety doesn’t work with Sunggyu. So tomorrow you try something different. You try something different each day until you succeed. I mean, if you aren’t willing to fight to get Sunggyu do you really deserve him?”

 

I thought about his words, and he was right. I knew that the road I was choosing wasn’t going to be easy. I knew that Sunggyu wasn’t going to magically feel the same way about me. I nodded at Hoya’s words, hope starting to build up within me.

 

“Thank you Hoya. Your words, they really are helping me more than you think.” I gave him a hug, honestly humbled that he was so invested in trying to help me achieve my happiness. Hoya got up to leave me and go on with his own business.

 

I started to think about it, a question bugging me. I asked him, stopping him in his tracks before he could leave the room. “I have to ask though. Why help me? It would be one thing to just give me verbal advice. But pretending to be Sunggyu.. kissing me like that.. What was in it for you?”

 

He licked his lips, which even I could admit was tantalizing even though he wasn’t the object of my affections. “Let’s just say I have my own reasons. I want my two members to be happy with one another. And you aren’t a bad kisser either.” He winked at me, unlocked the door and left me with my own thoughts. I laid back on my bed. _Damn this day has been… interesting to say the least._ I looked down at the inconvenience between my legs. _I guess a cold shower is in my future…_

* * *

Hoya made his way down the hall, smirking to himself. His plans had worked out perfectly. He scoped out the dorm, happily noticing the lack of members. _Except for one._ He knocked twice softly on the door, before making his way into the room. That’s when he got greeted with the delicious sight of a half spent Dongwoo.

“Fuck you Hoya. _Fuck you._ ” Hoya widened his eyes, feigning innocence. “What did I do hyung? I was just trying to please you.” He finished, locking the door behind him.

 

“Please me? Is that what you call it? You jump me at the photo shoot, get me to the brink of release with that evil mouth of yours, and then throw a cock ring on me telling me you’ll get me off once we get back to the dorm. Then you tell me to wait for you in my room only to not show up _forever_ leaving me like this..”

 

Hoya swiftly cut him off. “Oh I think you are forgetting something hyung. I told you to wait for me here, that’s true. But I think you are missing the part where I had a webcam going of me seducing our sweet little innocent Woohyun.” Hoya moved his hand down between Dongwoo’s legs, earning him a pained gasp from the latter. “And judging by this, you enjoyed watching me with someone else a little more than you are admitting.”

 

Hoya climbed over a writhing Dongwoo, pinning his hands above his head. “Tell me baby, how did it make you feel, watching me shove my tongue down Woohyun’s throat? Did we paint a pretty picture together?”

 

Dongwoo was swiftly losing his coherency, because everything Hoya was saying was true. He felt so dirty, loving the way Hoya played with Woohyun, knowing that he would come back to him. He wanted Hoya _s_ o badly it hurt _._

 

Hoya smirked down at him. He loved this version of Dongwoo. _The version that only his eyes got to see._ With the other members Dongwoo was always playful and happy go lucky. With him, Dongwoo was a sexual deviant, begging for his cock whenever he could get it. He loved reducing Dongwoo to a moaning mess, breaking him down piece by piece until he lost all of his senses, before putting him back together again.

 

Hoya noticed Woohyun’s feelings immediately. All those yearning glances and hopeful looks he threw to Sunggyu day by day. He noticed because that’s how he was with Dongwoo. He chuckled thinking back to those days, when he was nervous to even give Dongwoo a kiss. Back then he didn't have anyone he could confide in. It would have been nice to have someone he could’ve talked to about his feelings, so he wanted to be that person for Woohyun. The naughty side of him also couldn’t pass up the opportunity of getting Dongwoo hot and bothered with jealousy.

 

“ _Fuck you Hoya._ It made me feel angry. It made me furious to see you dominating someone other than me. But it turned me on knowing that you were doing it all for me. It made my cock hard knowing that you would come back to this room and fuck me until the only word I knew was your name.”

 

Hoya continued to palm Dongwoo’s erection pleased with his words. _Damn, he must be so far gone, I didn’t even have to ask him to beg me._ He decided that he especially liked this begging version of Dongwoo. He wanted more of it. “Tell me exactly what you want me to do to you baby.”

 

Dongwoo groaned in frustration, eyes beginning to tear up in need. “ _Fuck,_ baby please please. I want your cock inside me _right now._ God I love you so much you horny manipulative bastard. I fucking hate and love you so much at the same time right now for doing this to me.” Hoya gave his cock a particularly hard squeeze at the last sentence that sent him scrambling again. He threw his head back, arching his body to try to gain as much friction as possible from Hoya. “Please baby please. I need you so badly. Nobody but you. I need you to fuck me so I can come. I want to come so badly, I’ll scream your name, I’ll do whatever you want. Just please, fuck me right now.”

 

Hoya decided that Dongwoo had really been a good boy and he deserved to be rewarded. He went to grab the lube to prepare the latter for his cock. “No need.” Dongwoo stated, trying to force him back down to his body. Hoya bent down swiftly to kiss those lips before coming up again. “Baby, as much as I love to torture you with my words, I won’t do it with my body. I love you and I know you want me right now, but I’m not going to fuck you raw. I’ll never hurt you like that.” He went to move again.

 

“Ugh, no Hoya! There’s no need!” Hoya stared at him questioning. “There’s no need because I already prepared myself. While I was watching you with Woohyun. I prepared myself so I wouldn’t have to wait an extra second once I got you back here with me.” Dongwoo admitted, embarrassed at his own wantonness.

 

Hoya, on the other hand, was extremely satisfied by this revelation. _His boyfriend was such a freak and he loved it._ He captured Dongwoo’s lips in a kiss and pushed himself all the way into his body. He felt Dongwoo moan into the kiss, happy to finally be complete again. He set a slow pace, wanting to drive Dongwoo absolutely wild. He loved him so much in this moment, it was hard to catch his breath.

 

Dongwoo was rolling his hips, trying hard to encourage Hoya to go faster. He felt so good inside him that it was worth the previous torture. He looked into Hoya’s eyes and his breath hitched. The look Hoya was giving him was so full of love and admiration. It made his heart ache. “I love you so much.” He wanted Hoya to know that he felt all of him, his body and his heart. “Please let me..”  
  
  
“I will baby, I will..” Hoya cut him off, removing the constricting cock ring. Dongwoo yelled in relief, and with a particularly hard thrust to that bundle of nerves, Dongwoo was coming. “Hoya, Hoya, Hoya-” Dongwoo was chanting his name like a mantra. Hoya pulled out, giving him a moment to catch his breath. That’s when he noticed the cock ring again. “Hoya no, please..” but he stopped talking when he noticed Hoya place it on himself. “Baby..?” he questioned.

 

“You didn’t think we were done, did you?” Dongwoo shook his head, his body already begin to get excited at this new prospect. “I figure it’s only fair that I deny myself release after what I put you through. What do you say? How about I give one orgasm per kiss with Woohyun?” Then he was back inside him again, setting a brutal pace.

 

Dongwoo screamed out, clutching onto Hoya’s shoulders trying to hold on. Hoya's stamina was amazing without a cock ring, he could only imagine what the future had in store for him.  _Looks like tonight is going to be a long night then._ He would have to remember thank Woohyun in the morning. Because of him, he was going to have a very memorable evening.

* * *

A/N: Well, what did you guys think!? I guess the dirty side of my mind couldn't resist writing smut, but it wasn't the right timing for Woohyun and Sunggyu. So I just had to throw in some Yadong :)   Did Hoya's actions with Woohyun surprise you? I must say, I have always thought the two of them together are very pleasing to the eye (Ranking King anyone??) but I don't see a realistic relationship between them. But I thought a naughty Hoya would be very convincing in the whole 'you are definitely into boys' department. 

I hope you guys are liking the direction the story is going! And just so you know the inspiration for the Woohyun and Sunggyu pose during the photo shoot, it actually came from a photo of Sungyeol and Sungjong. Can we talk about some sexual tension?! 

 

The perfect picture of the Woogyu staring contest.  
  
Until next time guys!


	3. advice

_I couldn’t take my eyes off of him as he claimed the stage as his own. He was pretty much sex on legs, strutting around while seducing the crowd. I had never been to a rock show before, but when my friend Tori invited me to go see Beat, I figured what the hell. I had no regrets about my decision now, after being a part of such a thrilling experience. The music was far too loud and the club too crowded, but no one seemed to care. I found myself jumping up and down along with the crowd, bobbing my head to the heavy sounds. Even though I had never heard the songs before, I couldn’t stop myself from giving in to the music._

 

_He stepped away from the mic and stopped singing for a moment. I mentally pouted as I watched him making his way down the front row of the crowd, getting them even more excited. He started to walk to Tori and I’s side of the stage, so we reached out our hands to him as we danced to the music. He was standing in front of me now, and I got to appreciate his form on a stronger level after getting a closer look. He was wearing a black shirt and leather pants that were tight in all the right places. His hair was wild from all his head banging, and his eyeliner made his eyes look that much more enticing._

 

_Suddenly our eyes made eye contact. He stopped moving and crouched lower to the stage. The girls in front of me were going wild. But it was me who he was looking at, I was sure of it. He brought his fingers to his lips to kiss them, before pointing at me. He winked as he waltzed back to the mic, leaving me shocked where I was standing._

 

_“Oh my god! He tots just shot you with a KISS! We are SO going backstage!!! Ah I’m dying!” Tori screamed at me excitedly. But I couldn’t focus on her. All I could see was him. He was grabbing the mic again, licking his lips as he began to sing. His eyes were on me, and I felt like the only person in the room. The rest of his band's set was a blur, and before I knew it I was being led to the bar._

 

_“My baby needs some liquid courage! Something with a kick in it, I have a feeling that you’ll need the extra energy later. Two Red Bull and Vodkas please!” I couldn’t agree with her more. My body felt so hot, burning under his stare in the crowd earlier. I wondered if he would seek me out, or if I was just his eye candy for the performance. “Make that three please. On me.” I immediately turned around. I would be able to pick out that voice anywhere, even if he wasn’t singing. “The name’s Sunggyu. What’s yours beautiful?”_

 

_I was still in a state of shock at his sudden appearance and chivalry. Tori saved the day. “His name is Woohyun. He likes long drives, brown eyes, and guys that just don’t quite fit in.” She answered for me while passing out the drinks. Sunggyu chuckled at her response and locked eyes with me. “Dashboard Confessional lyrics? Almost as cute as he is. Except that I think you forgot the part about making out. That comes before the long drives.” She smiled, pleased that he picked up on her song reference. “I didn’t. I just figured that since I’m bailing on Woohyun right now to score my own cutie for the night, that you might step in and offer to drive him home.” He laughed, “So this is the part where I sweep him off his feet.” She nodded winking as she walked away. “I’ve given you the perfect in! Now it’s all up to you! Have fun!”_

 

_We were alone now, standing at the bar while he openly checked me out. I blushed, a little taken aback by this whole exchange. “I’m really not that romantic, or lame or whatever. I’m more of a tough guy really.” He sized me up again before stepping closer to whisper in my ear. “Woohyun, I’ll take you in any form. You can be whoever you want with me.” It really wasn’t fair that he looked so sexy, that I wanted him so badly. I moved his bangs out of his eyes so I could appraise his face. He looked so damn good, eyes half lidded and mouth slightly parted. I wanted, no needed him, and I wasn’t going to wait another moment. “So how big is your back seat?”_

 

_I got to find out sooner rather than later. He led me to the private parking lot behind the club where the staff parked. He unlocked the car door and climbed into the backseat, pulling my hand to make me get in faster. I was on top of him, kissing him hard while he ran his fingers down my back. “I’ve been wondering how you would taste Woohyun. From the moment I saw you on stage I knew I had to have you.” I hummed in appreciation before leaning down to steal another kiss. He was trying to tug my shirt off, so I leaned back to facilitate him, showing off my toned stomach in the process. He ran his fingertips down my abs before landing on the waistband of my jeans. “Fuck Woohyun, you are so fucking sexy. I want to see more.” I chuckled, amused by his reaction to my body._

 

_Suddenly he was flipping me over, the leather seats feeling cold against my hot skin. Then he was undressing, desperate to get his clothes off for me. “I know you are the romantic type, and I promise that I’ll make love to you. One day. But right now, I’m too desperate for you. I’ve had a hard on for the past hour and all I want to do right now is ride your cock. Will you let me?” He smirked down at me, rolling his hips against mine. “Yes. Yes, I fucking will.” I pushed my fingers to his lips so I could begin to prepare him, but he swatted my hand away. “Fuck that. I want to feel all of you. I’ll take you raw.”_

 

“No fucking way. Sunggyu is way too much of a grandpa to ever be fucked without preparation. His back would probably give out.” I instantly fell out of my chair with a yelp, surprised by Hoya’s sudden appearance and immensely embarrassed upon realizing that he had just caught me reading fanfiction. And not just _any_ fanfic, but a Woogyu story that was on a train with a one way ticket to Smutville _._

 

“Ya! How long have you been standing there?! How in the hell are you even here?” I angrily snapped at him. “Hyung, you are so cute when you are mortified. You should really remember to lock the door when your body decides it needs its daily dose of make believe Sunggyu. And I’ve been in here long enough that I’ve seen your hand disappear into your pants at least twice.” I moved to smack him, but he just danced away laughing. “You pervert! What kind of person watches an unsuspecting person masturbate?” Hoya just laughed harder. “Oh, so you ADMIT that you were about to masturbate to a fanfic of Sunggyu? Again? That’s so pathetic!”

 

He was so dead. _I_ was so dead. Was this really what I had reduced myself to? Sneaking away to look up dirty fan stories of the leader and I to satisfy my sexual desires? Oh god, I was totally going to hell. But I was bringing this bastard with me. “I’m the pervert?! You know I got suspicious when Dongwoo offered me all those snacks the other day right? It only took a couple minutes of prodding before he was confessing that he got some of the best sex of his life courtesy of our hot little session the other day.”

 

“Oh, so you thought our session was hot? Is this your way of admitting to me that your fanfic journeys have taken you down the road of howoogyu?! This pent up sexual frustration really is turning you into a freak.”

 

Why does the world hate me?! I screamed in utter frustration, unable to defend myself against his teasing. He must have felt guilty for his comments, because soon he was sitting next to me on the bed rubbing circles on my back to comfort me.

 

“Hyung, you know I am just teasing. Try to be a little more lighthearted. I’m just trying to point out that it isn’t exactly healthy to get all of your Sunggyu feels from fanfics. Although, this could be handy in the future if you guys are into roleplay. I think Leader Gyu still has that leather jacket from the Be Mine shoot.” He finished with a smirk.

 

“We are so not discussing whether or not me and the hamster will role play one day.” I rested my head on his shoulder, feeling like the weight of the world was pressing down on me. “I just don’t know what to do Hoya. I know he is the one I want. Only him. I’ve even tried looking at other guys, but I only end up comparing them to Sunggyu. I just feel this… sadness. Like there is a hole in me that can’t be filled by anyone but him.”

“Well if anyone is going to be filling a hole it will be you. I’m sure Gyu will like it.” I smacked his arm, begging him to be serious. “Ah! Okay, okay. Listen I know I’ve been giving you a hard time these past couple of days, but it’s only because your pain reminds me of my own. That time… before Dongwoo was mine was a hard one. Let’s just say that while it has always been Dongwoo for me, it wasn’t the same for him.”

 

My eyes opened in surprise. “What? Are you saying that.. Dongwoo has had other lovers besides you? Even when you two were together?” I couldn’t fight the anger that began to rise in my chest. Hoya chuckled again, but it didn’t sound as happy as before. “No, he has never cheated on me or anything like that. It was just…. the two of us have always been closer. He’s told me things about himself that you guys don’t know. So when Dongwoo started to think that maybe he wasn’t straight as he thought, I was the one he came to about it. He would confide in me which guys he thought were attractive, what he’d like to try out. It was… heartbreaking. On one hand, here is the guy I am crushing on admitting that he is gay. But he wasn’t making a pass at me so obviously I wasn’t the one he was interested in. I remember the first time a man kissed him. It was one of the worst days of my life.”

 

His eyes were downcast, the playful look now gone from remembering that time. “Hoya... you don’t have to relive this because of me. I don’t like seeing you this way.” He waved me off. “No, it’s okay hyung. I’ve never told you how we ended up together anyway. I just remember him crawling into my bed late one night. He had been out with friends, and I could smell the alcohol on his breath. He had the stupidest grin on his face. He told me that he had kissed a man for the first time. He told me how exciting it was, how hot it felt. I remember him holding my hand, whispering in my ear about someone else. When I told him I was happy for him he said he knew I would be. He told me that was why he’ll always come home to me. He slept peacefully in my bed that night while I laid there and cried.”

 

I held him close. “I’m sorry. I could only imagine how hard that would be. How sad it must of made you feel.” He laughed again, but this time it was a real one. “No, it was necessary. Because that morning when I woke up next to him, when his face was the first thing I saw I knew I wanted it to be that way forever. I decided that I would no longer play the best friend or confidant. Hearing him talk about someone else… knowing that I could lose him if I didn’t do _something…_ It gave me the courage to acknowledge that my feelings were real. That day was the day that I decided that I was going to make him fall in love with me. That I would make it so that he could only look at me.”

 

Hoya stood up and started to leave. “Wait! You can’t just leave the story there! You decided that you were going to make him love you, and based on the sheer number of snacks gifted to me the other day I’m pretty sure you were successful. So how did you do it?”

 

He got situated on the bed again, and I eagerly anticipated his advice. Maybe it would work for my hamster and me. He gave me one of his sexy smirks, _he really did master that look a little too well._ “What do you think? I seduced him. I kicked Sungjong out of our room and told him if he appeared again I would reveal the secret identity of his mystery phone pal. _(Sungjong was always texting someone, but no one ever knew who.)_ Then I gave Dongwoo what was probably the best blowjob of his life. Then right when he was about to climax I pulled away. I told him that if he wanted pleasure from me then he would have to give himself to me completely. He agreed, so I proceeded to fuck him so hard that my name was the only thing he remembered. The rest is history.” He started moving again, but I wasn’t having any of that.

 

“Okay, apparently you and seduction have been BFFs for longer than I could have foreseen. That wasn’t romantic at all! Hell that was borderline consensual! How do you even know he didn’t agree based purely on the fact that he was horny and left hanging? Yah, you really are a devious pervert who is entirely too good at playing mind games. There is no way that will work me!”

 

Hoya rolled his eyes. “Well obviously not. Let’s face it… when it comes to seduction you are nowhere near my level. Plus your overall lack of experience makes you too self-conscious to pull off such a dominating vibe. I mean I had you panting with a hard on in like two minutes flat from a kiss.”  
  
“Okay, do you really have to bring that up! Are you going to torture me with this knowledge for the rest of my life?!” Damn him and his sexy smirks and non-helpful advice for my failed love life.

 

“But hyung, if your reactions weren’t so satisfying I wouldn’t play with you as much.” I pouted, unhappy with the overall direction my day had gone since he walked in the door. “Fine, I’ll tell you the longer version. The part of me seducing him is true though.”

 

“Okay fine! What happened after your supposedly mind blowing sex?” Hoya smiled. But this time it was genuine one, I could see his eyes change as he fondly recalled the memories.

 

“We were laying there afterwards, still in a post orgasmic bliss.” I rolled my eyes at that one. “But I turned to him and I let him know the truth. I admitted that I had been in love with him for longer than I could remember. I conveyed how scared I was to admit it to not only him, but myself that the feelings I had were real. He was the first thought I had when I woke up in the morning, as well as the last person I wanted to see before going to sleep at night. I confessed that when I was with him I felt complete, and that he was the only person in the world that could make me happy. I told him that even if there was no Infinite, I would have found him in this world because we are soulmates. I told him that I was in love with him, and I couldn’t go another day without him knowing that.”

 

“Well damn. That was.. surprisingly sweet yet smooth. You are good. I hate you for that.” He laughed again before continuing. “He confessed to me too. He told me that he had wanted me in a more than friends way for awhile. He felt guilty because he didn’t want to take advantage of his innocent dongsaeng.” I laughed out loud at this. If only Dongwoo could have known then the sexual beast he would unleash within Hoya.

 

“Dongwoo told me that he couldn’t help himself though. He started bringing up liking men in our conversations to gauge my response. He purposely brought up different ideal types to see if I liked any that were similar to his appearance.”

 

“Well Dongwoo’s look is one of a kind, but in such a sexy way. I mean he has that whole carefree childish thing going on, but then writes raps like Paradise. So you know that there is a potential for an undercover freak there.” I felt the heat of Hoya’s stare on me. It was fucking scary. “Geez! I’m just stating facts here no one is trying to steal your man! I’m just saying that it’s kind of funny that both of you could have avoided suffering sooner if you had just been honest.”  
  


“Yeah, well hindsight is always clearer. He even admitted to me later on our anniversary that he kissed someone else to see if I would be jealous. God that was a memorable night. I punished him so well that he could barely walk straight for the next _week._ Now that I think of it, that was the year when me and him discovered just how fun toys could be…”

 

“Okay, now I’m scarred for life. You are supposed to be here to help me steal my grandpa’s heart, not give me a heart attack from your sexcapades.” I shuddered at the possibilities of Yadong and toys.

 

“Yah, I am helping you! Plus you know the idea of Yadong is hot, don't even lie. The moral of the story is that if you don’t make any moves you’ll never get anywhere! So if you want to spend your nights reading fanfiction and trying not to get caught by the other members, that’s your prerogative. You can fantasize about Sunggyu all you want. But you’ll never actually get to experience the real thing if you don’t man up and approach him seriously.”

 

I nodded. His words were true, the longer I did nothing, the more time I was wasting. “So you think that Sunggyu feels the same? That he is secretly pining after me like Dongwoo was for you?”

 

“Oh god no. What are the chances of that happening twice in one idol group? In your case, you’ll probably have to trick him into liking you back.” I stared at him, mouth agape at his bluntness. “Well I’d love to stay and chat, but all this reminiscing has me craving a certain dinosaur.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me and finally left me in peace.

 

It took a full minute for these new developments to sink in. One: Hoya and Dongwoo truly were sex fiends. Make sure to never get a hotel room next to the two of them. Two: Life wasn’t nice enough to me to grant me the present of Sunggyu immediately returning my feelings. Three: I had no idea how to proceed to change his friend feels for me to _lover_ feels. Four: Until my brain came up with any grand ideas, there was no harm in indulging in a few guilty pleasures to get me by until I could experience the real Sunggyu.

 

Well, that settled it. I got up to make sure the door was locked before opening up my laptop again. _Where did I leave off? Oh yes, let’s get reacquainted with Rocker Gyu’s backseat._ Then my worst nightmare happened. _This story isn’t completed?! Author won’t be able to update because of school for the next WEEK?_  
  


Fuck. My. Life.

 

* * *

A/N: Inspiration for Rocker Gyu below. He really shouldn't be allowed to do such things in public.

 

I really do enjoy writing the friendship between Hoya and Woohyun. I have always felt like Hoya is such a competitive person in real life, so I would like to imagine that he would be immensely happy to know that he has succeeded in the love department where his hyung hasn't yet. Cause in a way, it's like he is beating Woohyun at something :D

 

 

 

 


	4. flattery

Life was a little more hectic these days. We were traveling, doing a small showcase throughout Korea for our fans. I loved these types of events. We still got to share our music with our Inspirits, but the venues were much smaller. These shows were a lot more laid back and personal, and we got to talk to the fans more openly.

 

Sunggyu always stole the spotlight at these promotions. He had this magical ability to turn his biggest haters into his biggest fans, after seeing him live at a show. I think it was because his charisma during a performance was so undeniable. The way he held his mic with such confidence, hit all the big notes in every song consistently. The boy sang as easily as he breathed, and it made him so damn desirable.

  
I liked these types of events too, because this is where we would perform our necessary fanservice. In our arena tours, there was always so much going on. Whether it was the choreography, the skits, the lights, or the special effects I couldn’t say. We were held to such a high standard by the public, _sometimes unfairly so_ , and people expected us to be _perfect_ at our concerts. As a result, we felt sometimes constricted during our performances. It’s why we loved songs like Cover Girl and Entrust so much. It allowed us to feel free and connect with our fans.

 

But at these showcases, everything was different. Here the fans came to get to know _us,_ and asked us questions not only about our music, but also about ourselves as people, not idols. We usually got to sit in barstools on the stage and casually converse with the lucky fans that were chosen to ask us questions from the audience. It was here that the _couples_ of the group would have their subtle little moments that would send the fans into frenzy. The glances that lasted to long as another member spoke, the back hugs, the heart throwing, the not so innocent touches. I used to think nothing of these things, just chalking it up to being part of my job as an idol. But now… this was an opportunity to _touch_ Sunggyu without him questioning my intentions.

 

“My question is for Woohyun-oppa!” A girl from the audience giggled, waving in my direction. “I watched all of you on Birth of a Family. You all did well raising pets! What’s your favorite animal?” I tapped my chin pretending to think hard on the question. “Woohyun told me he really likes hamsters.” Hoya interjected and the fans began to cheer. Sunggyu was blushing cutely, and the other members were clapping, playing along.

 

“To be honest, I do really like hamsters. Almost as much as Hoya likes dinosaurs.” The cheers intensified to deafening levels. I held up half of a heart to Sunggyu, and he raised his hand to complete it, posing for our Inspirits. Was it just me, or was there a spark when we touched? The rest of the showcase went by quickly after that moment. I had touched Sunggyu more often than necessary, made sure to gaze at him longingly whenever he answered a fan question, at one point I even winked at him. But before long it was ending and we were making our way to the van.

 

“Nice word play earlier.” I whispered to Hoya as we were walking. “I thought you’d like it. The fans sure did. I think that’s the loudest I’ve ever heard them scream for our fan service!” I nodded smiling. “I guess I’ll be thankful for you today. I got to see him blush over me, it was so cute!” Hoya just laughed at me. “Aren’t you sharing a hotel room with Sunggyu tonight?” I nodded. “Yeah but I know that nothing's going to happen tonight. I’m just happy to be close to him.” Hoya looked at me with sympathy. “You’ll never be on his radar if you don’t make your intentions known.” I squeezed his hand, thankful for advice. “I know.”

 

I sat next to Sunggyu in the car. It had been a long day, and no one was really talking much. Sunggyu had a window seat, and he was staring at the night sky peacefully. I shifted closer to him and rested my head on my shoulder. He looked down at me, and I reached out to squeeze his hand. “I’m tired hyung, and you’re comfy. Won’t you let me rest like this?” He just nodded silently at me and turned his attention back to the window. I wish he have told me that it was no big deal, that he wanted me to lean on him. But at least his response wasn’t a no. I fell asleep quickly, never letting go of his hand.

 

Soon Sunggyu was shaking me awake. “We’re at the hotel. Get your things.” I moved, still half asleep trying to grab my stuff so I could exit the van. Sunggyu was already getting out, giving me a great view of his ass as he exited the van. _Damn._ Hoya flicked me and gave me a wink mouthing “I saw that.” I almost flipped him off in response.

 

We got our room keys from the manager hyungs, and the group started to split up to to go to their respective rooms. Once Sunggyu and I got to our room, he immediately laid down on one of the beds. “You shower first Woohyun. I’ll rest for a second.” I agreed, grabbing the necessary bathroom essentials before hopping in the shower.

 

The hot water had a soothing effect on me, and I couldn’t stop my thoughts from drifting to Sunggyu. Since I realized my feelings for him, nothing had changed between us. I did I good job of carrying on as normal, I doubted he even realized my inner turmoil. _Maybe that was the problem._

 

Hoya had told me that being best friends before dating was both a blessing and a curse.  On one hand, I had all this knowledge of Sunggyu and legitimate reasons to be around him all the time. The bad part was that we had spent _years_ as friends, so it would take a lot of work to make him see my in a new light. I turned off the water, and finished getting ready for bed.

 

When I walked out the bathroom, my senses were assaulted. Sunggyu was sprawled out on the bed sleeping soundly. One of his hands was dangerously close to his crotch, the other tucked behind his head causing his shirt to ride up, showing off the creamy smooth skin of his torso.

 

My feet moved subconsciously, and suddenly I was standing over him just staring. He looked so peaceful, younger even. I knew that he had so many worries lately. Even though we were successful, being the leader came at a price. I brushed his hair out of his face. _If only you’d let me share your burdens with you._

 

I slid on top of the bed next to him, lightly running my fingers over his cheek. I leaned close to whisper to him. “Sunggyu.” I traced my fingertips down his arm, before squeezing his hand. “Sunggyu.” This time a little louder. He began to stir. I kissed him on the ear, and called his name again. He opened his eyes and glanced at me slightly confused. “You need to shower before you turn in for the night. I went really quickly, I wanted to be sure you would have lots of hot water.” He nodded, sleepily rubbing his eyes as he gathered his things for his own shower. He was about to walk into the bathroom when I called out to him. He stopped waiting to hear what I had to say. “I just wanted to tell you how beautiful you looked while you were sleeping.” I smiled at him, and he shook his head and laughed, closing the door behind him.

 

While he was in the shower I thought about the way he looked. Now that I thought about it, me and Sunggyu had never really talked about our appearances. I had never fully expressed what I thought about him physically. Maybe I should compliment him, let him know how highly I think of him. More than a friend normally would. Perhaps then he could take my words seriously, and not try to write it off as me just being greasy since it was just the two of us alone. I also knew that Sunggyu was a little uncomfortable and insecure about his looks. This would be the perfect way for me to send a message and make him feel better all at once. I smiled, proud of myself for my new little plan.

 

Sunggyu emerged from the bathroom soon thereafter, and I set my plan into action. “Hyung. You performed really well today. You really shined out there.” He nodded, walking over to sit on the bed we were going to share. “Thanks. I think all of us did great today.”

 

“But what did you think of me hyung?” He grabbed one of the pillows and placed it in his lap. “What do you mean? You are always one of the fan favorites. You do great fanservice for our Inspirits. I’ll sure they will love you even more for that little animal conversation between you and Hoya.”

 

I shook my head. “Hyung, you told me what my fans think of me. I want to know what you thought of me today.” Sunggyu played with the pillow before looking back up at me. “I think you are a wonderful performer. Your vocals have matured with time, your voice seems like it continues to get better. You have always been one of the stronger dancers. You have good variety sense, and you connect better with fans than any of us. The public loves you and your over the top fan service. You are one of the strongest members in Infinite, no question.”

 

My heart swelled. Hearing him say such nice things to me face to face and not in an interview.. it was a little overwhelming. “But I’m nothing compared to Sunggyu hyung. You were the one who was brave enough to do a solo album. You’re the one the company trusted to be able to carry the weight on his own. You’re more than just a leader to us members. You take care of all of us, play with us and show us that it’s okay to have fun. But you still are able to keep us focused and make us work hard when it’s necessary. You’re also my best friend. I have always felt that I could talk to you about anything. I’m lucky I have you to depend on.”

 

“Thanks Woohyun. It’s nice of you to tell me that.” He put his pillow back, getting ready to lay down. I grabbed his wrist to stop him. “I’m not done hyung. You’re such a beautiful person on the inside and outside. You are so much more than your good looks or your body. You carry yourself with a level of confidence that I envy. I think very highly of you. You are the most attractive member to me.”

 

Sunggyu stared at me for a couple of moments. Was this it? The moment when he took me seriously? I had pretty much laid for feelings out there for him. Surely, he would understand. But then he started laughing.

 

“Who is she Woohyun?” I looked at him puzzled. “I’m not sure I understand what you mean…” I told him honestly. “Your girl! Who is she? Or maybe the better question is where are you meeting her?”

 

“Sunggyu, I don’t know what you are talking about.” What the hell was he saying right now. “I’m talking about your hook up for the night! Was it that girl that asked you the animal question? She was pretty hot. How did you manage to get her number?”

 

I was shaking my head, not sure how we had gotten here. “What makes you think that?” Sunggyu laughed. “I don’t know, maybe it’s the fact that you are kissing my ass right now. Saying I’m the most attractive member in the group? Really now you’re just being obnoxious. If you want something from me, just come out and say it. I know you are trying to butter me up so I’ll cover for you with the managers. You don’t have to flatter me for me to help you out.”

 

He was laughing, but I wasn’t. I had just poured my heart out, telling him how much I cared about him. And he thought I was trying to get laid by some fan. I needed to get out of here, _now._

 

“Yeah… you’re right. I wanted to meet up with someone.” He slapped me on the back. “I knew it! We all know you are the type to never miss out on the opportunity to perform your _fanservice._ I’ll cover for you if the managers ask anything. Have fun!”

 

Ouch. That one.. hurt a little more than it should have. It was easier to just lie. To let him think he was right about me. I changed quickly and made a show of grabbing the room key. Sunggyu gave me a thumbs up from the bed. “I won’t wait up!” He told me while he got comfortable. _No.. I never expected you to._  
  


I found myself in front of Hoya and Dongwoo’s hotel room. I tried calling both of them a couple times, but neither answered. And I _really_ needed them to answer. I felt my eyes beginning to sting, and I did not wait to burst into tears in the middle of a fucking hotel hallway.

  
I banged on the door a couple times. “Guys… please answer. It’s Woohyun.” I waited for a couple of minutes, still calling them on and off. Still nothing. “Come on guys.. let me in!” I raised my fist to bang on the door again when the door swung open.

 

I was greeted with the sight of a dripping wet Hoya. I would have appreciated  this under normal circumstances, but right now I was too depressed. “Well hello Woohyun, I definitely wasn’t in the middle of some steamy shower sex with my boyfriend before you showed up.”

 

Steamy shower sex. Something that me and Sunggyu would never do because he thought I was a straight whore who only said nice things to him to get something out of him. “God Woohyun, are you crying? Damn it. _Dongwoo get out of the shower!_ Come in.” Hoya pulled me inside and shut the door behind me. “You owe me. So hard. Give me two seconds to get dressed.” I nodded, sitting down on the bed trying to control my emotions.

 

The two of them emerged fairly quickly, hair still wet but dressed comfortably in sleepwear. Dongwoo came to sit next to me and squeezed my hand. “Don’t let Hoaegi make you feel bad. He gets a little… stressed whenever he is interrupted. You can always come talk to us if you need to.” Hoya rolled his eyes at this, muttering something about me and horrible timing.

 

“So what happened hyung? Did you tell him how you feel?” Hoya asked, making himself comfortable in a chair in front of us. I filled them in on the events of the past hour. “So I just let him think he was right, and I left. Which means I need to hang out in here for awhile. Sorry if that ruins your plans.”

 

I waited patiently for their reactions. No one said anything. “This would be the point where you tell me that everything will be okay or you give me some advice..” I tried to prompt them.

 

Dongwoo finally spoke up. “I’m sorry Woohyun… but what you did was kind of.. how do I say this.. stupid?” I gaped at him. “What! How am I in the wrong here?!” Hoya chimed in. “Isn’t it obvious? You blew a perfectly good opportunity to make it clear to Sunggyu that your words were coming from a non-platonic, honest place. You pretty much exposed how you really thought about him, and then preceeded to take it all back by pretending that you were just saying those things to deceive him.” I looked down at my hands, caught off guard by their opinion.

 

“Furthermore, by agreeing to his incorrect assumption, you further cemented in his mind that you are into women. You didn’t even try to correct him by saying that you were going to meet a guy.” Dongwoo continued. “So in conclusion, firstly you falsely told Sunggyu that you are straight. Secondly, you made him think you would hook up with a random fan. Thirdly, you made him think that you would say anything to achieve said goal, even at the expense of making a member lie for it to happen. Last and definitely not least, you made him think that you don’t think any of those nice things at all. So all of your kind words and compliments came from an insincere place since you were trying to get into someone else’s pants, even if that meant lying about Sunggyu’s qualities.”

 

Hoya shook his head at me. “To put it bluntly, you kind of fucked up.” I burst into tears. “Yah, calm down! You fucked this situation up, but that doesn’t mean there’s no hope!” I cried harder. “Dongwoo just made a fucking list of all the things I managed to do wrong while trying to confess to him. There is _no_ hope for me, that’s for damn sure.”

 

Dongwoo wiped my tears away. “Don’t talk like that Woohyun. Don’t give up so easily! So you made a mistake tonight, that doesn’t mean you can’t repair it! You can tell him that you never meet up with anyone, that you decided to come hang out with us instead. Which is the truth in the first place.”

 

I calmed down a little bit. I realized that by chickening out earlier I had kind of made a bigger mess for myself. That situations like these would continue to happen if I didn’t make my true intentions known. I sighed in disappointment. “You guys are right. About everything. I got scared earlier, and I took the easy way out by lying. The only person to blame for this situation is myself. I’ll apologize to him in the morning. He’s probably asleep by now anyway, so I can just go back to my room.”

 

I got up and gave them each a hug. “Thanks for listening guys, and making me see how much of a dumbass I can be.” They laughed at this. “We only have that interview tomorrow morning on our schedule, we could go to brunch together. You can let us know how the apology goes?” Dongwoo asked me. I agreed with this idea, and waved goodbye to them.

 

As I suspected, Sunggyu was asleep when I got back to our room. I quietly changed, and slid into bed next to him. I turned my body to face him. _One day I’ll tell you how I really feel, without messing up. I promise._ I closed my eyes to sleep, hoping that tomorrow would somehow be better.

* * *

I watched the door close at Woohyun's departure. Dongwoo was pouting cutely. “Poor Woohyun. He is so romantically challenged. He is so lucky to have someone like you to help him. Do you think he will be able to make things right with Sunggyu?”

 

I wasn’t really listening to what my boyfriend was saying, just nodding periodically. I was simply guiding him in the direction of the bathroom while planting kisses on those sweet lips. Finally he pushed me away. “Hoya! Are you even paying attention to me?”

 

I gave him a deep kiss, my tongue tangling with his as I shut the bathroom door behind us. “Does this not count as paying attention to you?” I asked him. I could see the blush building in his cheeks. I pushed him into the walk-in shower and abruptly turned on the water. “Hoya! We just showered!” He screamed at me, now dripping wet in his pajamas. He looked sexy as hell, especially with that mad glint in his eyes.

 

I had already shrugged out of my t-shirt and sweatpants before joining him inside the shower. “Whoops, how clumsy of me. Guess you’ll have to take those clothes off, we wouldn’t want you to catch a cold.” I told him as I started to pull the wet fabric from his body. He was staring at me incredulously.

 

“Dino.. did you really think that we would be going to sleep without finishing our previous activities?” I questioned him as I slowly dropped to my knees to help him slip out of his pants and boxers. He was looking down at me, the lust already building in his eyes as my mouth moved to wrap around his cock.

 

His head fell back to rest against the sliding glass door. “No.. I guess I didn’t.” After that, Dongwoo seemed to mysteriously stop having a problem with taking two showers in one night.

 

* * *

A/N: Okay, how does Sunggyu resist this?!

And this?!?!!

  
I enjoy the idea of Woohyun and ropes way more than I should.

 


	5. intoxication

Chapter 5 - Intoxication

When I woke up that morning, Sunggyu was already gone. I grabbed my phone to check the time, and I noticed I had a text from him.

_The interview for this morning got rescheduled. You looked exhausted, so I didn’t want to wake you. I grabbed some of your favorites from the breakfast bar. I left them on the counter so you wouldn’t be hungry. Me and the guys went out, call us when you are ready to meet up._  
  
  


That was my Sunggyu, always looking out for me. Even after last night, he went out of his way to do something nice. I sent him a quick thank you text and got ready for the day. I decided to eat my breakfast on the go, so I could see him sooner.

 

The guys were at a salon by the time I meet up with them. “Hyung! I’m glad you made it sleepyhead!” Sungjong sang cutely to me as the noonas pampered him. The maknae line was busy getting their nails done. “The other hyungs just finished their massages. They went to get drinks at the café across the street.” Myungsoo informed me. “I’ll just go over there then, since you guys have already gotten started.” I said a quick goodbye and headed out the door.

 

Sunggyu, Hoya, and Dongwoo were sitting by the window, laughing and enjoying themselves. Sunggyu was facing the door, so he noticed me when I walked in. I waved before pulling up a chair to the table. “So you have decided to join the world of the living…” Hoya teased me. “Ya! It just barely turned noon! You guys are just jealous that you didn’t seize the opportunity for nap time.” Dongwoo rolled his eyes. “I wanted to! But Sungyeol wanted all of us to go explore the city together since our schedule opened up. He forced all of us out of bed at like, nine.” Hoya interjected. “Except for you that is. Sunggyu hyung warned Sungyeol not to disturb your sleep, he even threatened to take away his Americano privileges.” I laughed at this, Sungyeol was really too easy to manipulate once you started threatening his coffee.

 

“You looked so tired Woohyun, I wanted you to sleep well. Plus I figured you could use the extra rest after your… activities last night.” Sunggyu explained winking. I made eye contact with the rappers, and they got the hint. “I think me and Hoya are going to go to the records store, GD just came out with a new album that we wanted to check out.” Hoya nodded, “We can grab lunch on our own. We’ll meet back up with you guys at the hotel later.” I mouthed a silent thank you to them, and they departed.

 

“Actually hyung, I wanted to talk to you about last night.” Sunggyu shook his head, “You don’t have to explain yourself to me Woohyun! I told you I was okay with it.” I sighed, trying to figure out how to start. “Just let me try, okay? I didn’t go out with a girl last night. I just pretended that was the case when you brought it up. In reality, I just went to Hoya and Dongwoo’s room for a little while.”

 

Sunggyu looked at me confused. “But why lie to me? You could have just told me that I had jumped to the wrong conclusion and that would have been the end of it.”  
  
“I know. And I’m sorry. But I got scared so I took the easy way out.” Sunggyu was staring at me hard now. “Scared of what?” I took a deep breath, this was it. _Now or never Woohyun, make it happen!_

 

“I meant all those things I said about you yesterday. I care so much about what you think about me, and I wanted to let you know how important you are to me. I hate that I made you think that I said those nice things to try to take advantage of you. I would never want to do that. I only want to take care of you Sunggyu. I want to mean as much to you as you mean to me.”

 

“But you do. We each depend on one another more than anyone else in the group. You are my best friend Woohyun. And I am yours.” Sunggyu told me, reaching out to squeeze my hand.

 

“That’s just it Sunggyu. I don’t want to be your best friend anymore, I want…” I was cut off by the sudden appearance of a certain choding. “Ya! Sunggyu hyung! You promised me Americano if I didn’t bother Woohyun this morning and let him show up on his own time. Pay up, pay up, pay up!” Myungsoo was laughing next to him. “You’re already this hyper and you haven’t even consumed the caffeine yet!” Sungjong chimed in to nag. “And stop waving your arms around like that! We just got our nails done.”

 

I sighed, the moment ruined beyond repair, courtesy of these three idiots. Sunggyu locked eyes with me before standing up from the table. My hand felt so light without the pressure of his on top of it. “Come on choding, I’ll buy you your stupid coffee.” Sungyeol cheered, trailing behind him whispering how wonderful of a leader he was.

 

“Did we interrupt something? You looked like you were talking about something serious.” Sungjong asked politely. I sighed. “Nope, you didn’t ruin anything at all…” _Just the courage I had to finally freaking confess._

* * *

The production team and staff cheered and clapped for us. We had just successfully wrapped up our last showcase. It was always customary for us to have a celebration once we finished a promotion, so our company had rented out the hotel ballroom for our private gathering.

 

Everyone was in high spirits. Tonight’s show had been one of our best yet. We even did a couple encores, just to drive the fans crazy. Even I had teared up during the customary goodbye segment, telling the Inspirits just how special the event had been for the group. But once the lights had gone off and the adrenaline had faded away, I couldn’t deny one thing. On the inside, I was hurting. 

 

Despite the fact that my confession had been abruptly cut off earlier today, I think Sunggyu understood where it was going. At least that’s what I assumed, considering the fact that he hadn’t spoke to me since that conversation. Outside of the necessary banter and choreography during our performance, Sunggyu hadn’t even looked at me. I felt the wall growing in between us, and I felt powerless.

 

Sunggyu appeared to be just fine. He was laughing and drinking, fully enjoying himself at the party. I, on the other hand, was sulking in a corner downing champagne like there was no tomorrow. Now that the fans weren’t watching, I had neither the energy nor desire to put on a happy face. The people at the party were too caught up in their own emotions and the joy of the event to bother messing with me. All except for one that is.

 

“What’s going on hyung? You’ve been pouting by yourself all night. How many of those have you had by the way? We didn’t get to talk before the show, what happened after me and Dongwoo left?” I just shook my head sadly. “Nothing. I told Sunggyu where I really was last night. I told him that I had meant everything I said about him. I started to confess my true feelings, I told him I didn’t want to just be his friend anymore and then we got interrupted by the rest of the members.” Hoya scooted closer to me. “So you got cut off before you could tell him the truth about your feelings?”

 

“He heard enough Hoya. Even though we got interrupted, he heard enough. I know, because he has been avoiding me ever since. Outside of work for the show, he hasn’t even glanced my way since this afternoon. He’s rejecting me.” Hoya was silent for a while. Now I knew I was really fucked.

 

“I think you should talk to him. You guys need to finish your conversation. You have the right to say how you feel, and he should allow you to completely voice your emotions before he can reject you. Hell, he hasn’t _technically_ rejected you yet. But since there is already miscommunication issues between the two of you, the sooner you clear this matter up the better.”

 

“It already hurts Hoya. It’s only been _hours_ since the café and it already hurts this much. Do I really want to purposely force myself to hear his rejection? To actually listen to him tell me that he doesn’t feel the same way. I don’t want to torture myself like that.”

 

“I’m sorry hyung, but I think you should confront him. Even if it doesn’t go your way, at least you will know for sure. Right now you are just making assumptions, and we both know what that does. So put that liquid courage to good use and man up.” I looked down at my hands. The champagne looked pretty, bubbling away just like my stomach at the prospect of talking to Sunggyu. My eyes immediately searched for him; he was making his way to the bathroom. “Man up?” I questioned Hoya. He nodded as I finished off the remainder of my glass. “Man up.”

 

I walked into the bathroom, checking to see if anyone else was present. Luck was on my side this time, it was just me and Sunggyu. He was washing his hands when I locked the door. He glared at me.

 

“Finally.” He arched his eyebrow. “Finally what?” I scoffed. “You looked at me. We’ve been around each other all damn day and you’ve refused to meet my eyes since the café. So I’m glad you finally graced me with your attention.” He just continued to stare at me. “Woohyun, how many drinks have you had?” I sneered at this. “What in the hell does that have to do with anything? The fact that I’m drunk doesn’t change anything right now or what I’m about to say.”

 

“Woohyun I don’t think we should talk about this right now.” He tried to move past me but I stopped him. “That’s too bad because I think that this is the perfect time to have this conversation. I got interrupted earlier and I want to finish what I was going to say.”  
  


“ _Woohyun. Enough._ ” I just ignored him. “No! This is not _enough._ What we are doing right now is not _enough_ for me, okay?! I don’t want to be just your friend anymore. I’m attracted to you. _I want you._ And I’ve wanted to tell you for so long. You dominate my thoughts day and night. I _dream_ about what it would be like to touch you. So I’m sorry that I had to lock you in a bathroom, and I’m sorry that I had to drink this much champagne just to build up the courage to do this. But honestly, I just can’t go another damn minute in this limbo. I can’t function for another _second_ without doing this.”

 

He opened his mouth in surprise, which was perfect because I was putting my lips on his. He tasted like sweet champagne and something that just seemed like _Sunggyu_ and suddenly I felt like I was more intoxicated then I had previously realized. My hands were clutching at his jacket, pulling his body close to mine against the bathroom door. I was moaning because his lips were so much softer than I could have ever imagined and his body felt like it fit into mine and suddenly I didn’t care about schedules or obligations or _anything_ because he felt so damn good that nothing else mattered.

 

I thought that this was heaven, that I couldn’t come down but then he was kissing back. His tongue was moving against mine and we were fighting for dominance and his hands were working their way into my hair and _oh my god._ I needed to breathe, I needed air but I didn’t care about oxygen because I had _him_ but I already felt so lightheaded so I forced myself to break away from his addicting lips.

 

I moaned his name into his ear. “ _Sunggyu.”_ Then I felt him shift. Like me saying his name broke him out of a trance. Because suddenly there was space between us and now my body felt _so cold._ He was backing away from me and _oh no, oh no._ “Hyung?” I called for him, why did his eyes look so sad when what we were just doing felt so good?

 

“I can’t do this.” He was whispering so softly that I might not have heard it if I wasn’t so desperate for his voice. For him. He was unlocking the door and I was beginning to panic. “Hyung, don’t go..”

 

“We shouldn’t be doing this.” My eyes were burning, and I fought the tears I knew would eventually come. I tried to reason with him. “ _We_ both want this. This feels right and..”

 

“No Woohyun. This feels _wrong._ ” He was pushing me off the door; I couldn’t even try to stop him, my body suddenly felt weak, and he was just walking away. The door was closing behind him and I was all alone. He left me.  And I had a really bad feeling that I had just ruined everything.

 

I felt sick. Wait, literally sick. I ran to the nearest stall and emptied the contents of my stomach. This went on for a couple of minutes until there was nothing left inside me. I fell down to the floor and I couldn’t stop the tears that came. I was in hell, I was in hell.

 

Nothing felt real anymore. After awhile I felt a pair of hands pick me up, and take me to the sink to help me wash off. I looked in the mirror to find Hoya staring back at me; His eyes were sad, and I knew that he knew without me having to say it. He supported me as I stumbled to my room, helped me clean up and changed me into something comfortable. I looked around and he knew what I was asking. “Me and Sunggyu switched rooms for the night.”

 

That’s when I fell apart. _This feels wrong._ That’s how he described touching me. I had kissed the person I loved for the first time and it disgusted him. So much so that he couldn’t even force himself to share a room with me. I was sobbing now, and Hoya was holding me, trying to keep the pieces of me together.

 

He was chanting in my ear. “It will be okay, you will be okay.” I didn’t believe him. I was drunk, and sick, and heart broken, and I would never recover from this. I fell asleep that night wishing that I would never have to wake up again.

* * *

A/N: sorry for the angst, please enjoy this gif of woohyun's abs to make up for it.  


 


	6. avoidance

_It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all._

Fucking. Bullshit.

The dumb ass that came up with that quote had obviously never experienced heartbreak. The pain was something I never could have foreseen, and the constant sting of hurt never left. My life without Kim Sunggyu was no life at all. There was no meaning, no motivation to keep going.

 

The part that sucked the most was the fact that it took me losing Sunggyu for me to realize just how much I loved him. Before that night… before our kiss, I knew that I had wanted him. I knew that I cared about him more than anyone else. I knew that I wanted something more than friendship. But that night I don’t know if I would have been able to tell him that I loved him.

  
But now, there was no question in my mind. Because every morning the first thing my eyes did was search for him, despite knowing that he had switched rooms in the dorm. My heart ached just a little less whenever I saw him smile, even though the expression was never directed at me. I played his stupid fucking solo album all the damn time in the privacy of my headphones, just so I could hear his beautiful voice.

  
Without realizing it, prior to my confession my life had slowly but surely began to revolve around Sunggyu. And now that he was gone… I was lost. Everything between us was now strictly professional. We hadn’t touched since that night. The only occasions we spent extended periods of time together was during practice. I had taken to eating my meals separate from the group, because I knew it would make him more comfortable. _Damn him._ Even in his rejection, he controlled my actions. But I couldn’t help it. All I wanted was to make him happy. Unfortunately for me, the thing that seemed to please him the most was my absence.

 

To me Sunggyu was a drug, an addiction. I thought that quitting him cold turkey would make things easier for me. Not that I really had a choice in the matter, I knew that Sunggyu was done with me the morning after our kiss. I was still slightly hungover in the hotel room, and he had stopped by to grab the rest of his things. I just wanted to talk, to try to figure things out while we sober. Sunggyu was going to walk out the room, and I reached for him to stop him. He flinched. He fucking _flinched_ and jumped away to avoid my touch. And in that moment, I knew it was over. When he walked out the door that day, our friendship had ended. The sad thing for me was that he took my heart with him.

 

That was the hardest thing for me to accept. You would think that if you knew that a person didn’t want you, that they were disgusted by you, and if they rejected you that you would get over them. That knowing without a shadow of a doubt in your mind that you would never get to be with them in the way you wanted would cause you to wake up. The problem was that despite my mind accepting this reality, my heart didn’t. So I clung to the little things to get through the day. A joke I overheard him tell Dongwoo. A laugh he shared with Sungyeol. A hug he shared with Myungsoo. Praise he bestowed upon Hoya. Advice he gave to Sungjong. I lived through my members, an outsider looking in on what it felt like for Sunggyu to care about you.

 

I missed him. All day long I missed him. And as the days turned into weeks that eventually became months, it didn’t decrease. It never got any easier. If anything it became harder. Because I knew that each day we didn’t fix things between us, each day that we didn’t repair our friendship equated to a day that Sunggyu was okay living without me.

 

In the beginning I cried every night. The days were pretty much a ritual of me struggling to keep control of myself around Sunggyu. Forcing myself not to run to him, to beg for his forgiveness. Or to ask him to try to forget what happened that night, even though I knew neither of us could. After practice we would return to the dorm, and I would go to the room I now shared with Dongwoo. I would wait until the lights were out before I allowed the tears to fall down my cheeks. On the really bad nights, Hoya and Dongwoo would climb into my bed. They would surround me with their love until I fell asleep. In the beginning, they were a lot of really bad nights.

 

After I while I stopped crying. Not because I cared less, but because I had become numb. It was like one day I woke up, and I had nothing left, no energy to cry. Nothing in life stimulated me anymore. The only thing I required was him, and I was constantly deprived of my desires. I didn’t have control over anything anymore. Except for one thing.

 

I’m not exactly sure when my disorder began. Initially, I didn’t eat because I was too sad. Or I would skip a meal because I didn’t want to force Sunggyu to eat in my presence. Then they were times when I was hungry but I would deny myself. I felt powerful, proud that I was able to finally control an emotion. That was when things started to get out of hand.

 

It was easy, too easy to hid my problem from the other members. We were all so tired and so overworked all the time. I would be forced to eat sometimes in front of them, if lunch was delivered during practice. Then I would go to the bathroom and throw it all up. I got caught a couple times, but I wrote it off as eating too much and dancing so hard. At the dorm, all it took was a quick excuse of being too tired to eat dinner. I made a show of buying snacks and then I would secretly dispose them.

 

I started to laugh at myself, I was so pathetic. I made the mistake of falling in love with my best friend, and I was stupid enough to think that he’d love me back. And now, the only way I knew I was alive was to feel the constant burn of hunger. If I was hungry, I could focus on that sensation instead of the pain in my heart. Because even though it was hard on my body, there was such a _rush_ when I would count my calories at the end of the day. A small joy I would feel when I realized with my exercise that I was in the negative. I saw my waist getting smaller, my muscles more defined. It was quite addicting. Almost as addicting as Kim Sunggyu.  


 

* * *

We didn’t have practice until late afternoon today, and Dongwoo had invited me out for lunch. He had been a good friend to me these past couple of months along with Hoya, and I was thankful for him. I was surprised that he wanted to go out just the two of us, but I didn’t mind an excuse to leave the dorm.

 

“Woohyun, I feel like I have been here for you these past couple of months. I’ve been trying to let you figure things out on your own, to deal with your grief in your own way.”  


Well this was an unwanted surprise. I could tell by the tone of his voice a lecture was coming. “What do you want me to say? Do you think I enjoy feeling like this everyday? Don’t you think I want to move on? I _loved_ him Dongwoo. I still love him. How am I supposed to live normally when things are like this? If Hoya was suddenly taken out of your life, how do you think you would feel?”

 

“It would be hell. I know that you are going through hell right now. I’m not saying you aren’t allowed to feel upset, I’m not judging you for that. The reason we are having this conversation right now is because I care about you, and I’m trying to help. I thought that this would be a phase, that you would start to handle things in a healthier way.”

 

“You just said you understood where I’m coming from, but now you are trying to put a time limit on how long I’m allowed to be sad about losing the person I was in love with?!” I was starting to get upset with him.

 

“That’s not what I’m talking about Woohyun.” I rolled my eyes at this. “Then I’m confused. Because last time I checked I was getting better. I haven’t cried in weeks. You and Hoya haven’t had to help me sleep in weeks. I call that progress. So clue me in because I’m not a mind reader."

 

Dongwoo looked so angry, and I had never seen this side of him. “Then tell me. If you are doing so much better, when is the last time you ate a full meal?”

 

My heart stopped. How the fuck did he know? I tried to cover. “What are you talking about? We are currently at lunch together as we speak. I just ate my entire entree, crazy.”

 

“And how many minutes until you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom and throw it all up? Don’t bother trying to bullshit me. I’m your roommate for god’s sake. Did you really think I wouldn’t notice? You’re lucky that I decided to keep this from Hoya, because I knew he would probably kill you himself if he found out you're starving yourself.. Seriously Woohyun listen to what I just said. _You are starving yourself._ I thought that maybe this would be a temporary fix for you but it’s not. I’ve been watching you and this has gone on too long. I know that you are hurting emotionally, but hurting yourself physically isn’t the answer. I just don’t understand..”

 

It was my turn to cut him off now. “No, you don’t fucking understand. You have _never_ felt anything close to this. You’ve never hoped and dreamed for love, only to have it crash and burn. You’ve never looked into the eyes of the man you loved and only seen hatred! You’ve never felt broken, like an entire piece of yourself is missing. Because that’s what I feel Dongwoo. Every fucking day I feel incomplete. Because guess what? Without him, I am not a whole person. Every night I go to bed unfulfilled. He is _everything_ to me and I am _nothing_ to him and that isn’t going to change. So you can be concerned, and you can feel sorry for me, but you don’t get to judge me. I make no apologies for the way I chose to repair myself, or the things I do to get through each horrible day. You, a person that has found the love of his life and is treasured by him in return, don't get to analyze my behavior. So in response to your earlier question, the number of minutes until I excuse myself is fucking zero. Because I am going to get up from this table right now and go do what I need to do. Because I have no influence on how Sunggyu feels about me. But this.. _this_ is the only thing in my miserable fucking excuse for a life that I have complete control over. And you can’t take that away from me. I _won't_ let you. So leave it the fuck alone.”

 

I was shaking as I stood up from the table. I could see the tears on Dongwoo’s face. I felt sorry for the outburst but I couldn’t risk losing this. He had to know that I meant business. After I finished up in the bathroom, we left the restaurant. The cab ride home was filled with silence. Once we got back to the dorm, Dongwoo told me that he would give me some alone time. I couldn’t apologize, not now. So I squeezed his hand, and hoped someday he would understand.

 

 

* * *

Everyone has their breaking point. For every situation in life you have to be flexible, to have a certain amount of tolerance before it becomes too much. I had told myself that I wouldn’t directly interfere. That I would allow things to fall into place with time. But now… I couldn’t do this anymore. Things could not continue on this way and if today’s lunch was any indication, this was only the beginning of a downward spiral. I raised my hand to knock on the door.

 

“Hyung. We need to talk. _Now._ ”

 

Sunggyu and I relocated to roof as I deemed it necessary to be able to speak in private. “Dongwoo, what’s the problem? You seem upset.”

 

“You. You are the fucking problem.” I said with no hesitation. “Excuse me?” He was shocked by my words but I wasn’t in the mood nor did I feel I had to the time to beat around the bush.

 

“Why are you doing this to Woohyun? Why are distancing yourself from him when you want him too? At first I thought that the two of you just needed time. That eventually you would be smart enough to just have a conversation and figure things out with him. But you haven’t, and I can’t sit by and watch him hurt himself any more!”

 

“I’m not sure what you think you are talking about…” Sunggyu started but I interjected swiftly. “I know about the kiss, okay? Woohyun told me. And I’ve been so pissed off about it but I held my tongue. But no fucking longer. Woohyun thinks that you are disgusted by the kiss because he is a man. But we both know the truth, don’t we? Because you didn’t have any fucking problem kissing me and the last time I checked, there is a dick in between my legs. Back in our trainee days, you trusted me enough to experiment. We both know that you are gay. So why in the fuck are you letting Woohyun think that he assaulted you with unwanted sexual advances when it’s not true! Hell, you’d think that he would be smart enough to analyze the fact that you kissed him back, but he’s so busy trying to stay out of your way and not offend you again that he is blind to it! He loves you so goddamn much that he is willing to sacrifice his own happiness and well being just to facilitate you!”  
  
“Dongwoo, you don’t have all the answers that you think you do! Woohyun drunkenly kissed me and I kissed back, yes. But he doesn’t have feelings for me! He told me that he wanted to be more than a friend. He told me that he wanted me. And then we were hooking up. It was purely sexual. He admired me as his hyung, and he wanted to play. He never said anything about love or his emotions. And that’s not who I am, nor is it the kind of relationship I want. I can’t just be Woohyun’s fuck buddy. I could never be able to only have his body and not have access to his heart. So I told him that it felt wrong, because it was. It was wrong for our first kiss to drunkenly occur in a public restroom. But that told me everything I needed to know. If he was that desperate for action that meant he didn’t really need _me._ But why would he? He’s fucking beautiful and I’m not. He’s so out of my league and I guess I should be flattered that he wanted to mess around with me, but in the end I knew it wouldn’t work out. I knew that if I allowed myself to be with him in that way that I would want more. So I’m sorry if you got the wrong impression, but the only one who is suffering from unrequited love here is _me._ He’s the one who got turned down for a bathroom fuck and decided to cut me out of his life. So don’t you dare try to put me in my place when you don’t even have your facts straight.”

 

I shook my head, desperate to try to get him to understand the truth. “He loves you Sunggyu. Maybe that night he didn’t present himself in the correct way, but his love for you is something you should believe in. That you shouldn't question! I’m sorry that you can’t see it. And I’m sorry that I am getting involved in your business. But you two idiots won’t fucking talk to each other and save each other from this unnecessary pain. Woohyun loves you so much that he is hurting himself just to stay afloat. And he is going to hate me for this. He’s never going to forgive me but I think the only person who can help him right now is you so I have to say something.”

 

“What are you trying to tell me Dongwoo?” Sunggyu was clutching my arm now, his eyes piercing me while he waited for my response.

 

“I’m not sure when it started exactly. I’ve known that Woohyun was in love with you for a long time, but I didn’t know you felt the same way. I wish I would have known sooner. Anyway, after the incident at that wrap party Woohyun was initially very depressed. But he only showed it at night. He would cry himself to sleep, so Hoya and I would comfort him. But after a couple months he stopped crying and I thought that he was getting better, that his heart was hurting less. But in reality he just found a new way to numb his pain over you.”

 

“Tell me.” Sunggyu pressured me. I felt the first tears start to slip down my cheek.  
  
“He’s starving himself Sunggyu. I had suspected something was off, but I wasn’t sure. I confronted him today, and he admitted it was true. He eats in front of us on purpose, but throws it up later. He only pretends like he eats dinner in our room, but he never does. He said that he can’t control the fact that you don’t love him back, but he can control what he eats. He said the burning from hunger allows him to temporarily forget the burning in his heart. I’m so afraid for him, and he is so serious about this I really think he could hurt himself in the long run. That’s why I had to get you involved. I know he won’t forgive me for betraying his secret to you but I don’t think I care anymore. Something has to change, the risks are too great.”

 

I was staring at my hands while I explained, so I finally looked up at him to gauge his reaction. And holy shit, I had never seen a more menacing look on his face. He looked so angry that I legitimately thought he was going to hit me for a second. Then he started to speak.

 

“This is what you are going to do. You will get everyone out of this dorm right fucking now except for Woohyun. None of you will return until tomorrow. And that will be after I call you to give you permission to come back. This bullshit stops fucking tonight.”

 

“But Sunggyu, you aren’t going to hurt him are you? You seem so angry..”

 

“The only person I am considering hurting right now is you. How dare you let this go on this long without telling me? The only reason I’m not kicking your ass right now is because I know you were trying to help Woohyun, and you did eventually tell me the truth. So I’m not going to hurt him, I’m going to take responsibility for him the way I should have months ago. Now do what I asked of you.”

 

I nodded, running downstairs to gather up the troops. Everyone was in the living room except for Woohyun. Which wasn’t a surprise since he mainly kept to himself nowadays. I pulled Hoya aside to fill him in on the mission, and soon everyone had an overnight bag and was shuffling out of the dorm.

 

I went into our bedroom to fetch Woohyun. He was lying on his bed with his headphones in. As I got closer I noticed the song playing was “I Need You” from Sunggyu’s solo album. _Oh Woohyun, if only I would have acted sooner._

 

I pulled one of his earbuds out. “Hey, someone needs to talk to you in the living room. It’s really important.” He looked at me warily and reluctantly followed me. I heard his footsteps stop short when he saw who was waiting for him.

 

He was looking at the two of us confused. Sunggyu spoke up. “The two of us need to talk. I’ve asked the rest of the members to leave for the remainder of the night and not return until tomorrow. Thank you Dongwoo for your help.”

 

I felt saddened by the look in Woohyun’s eyes, he looked so scared. I moved closer to him and kissed his cheek. “Everything will work out for the best. Just be honest, don’t hold back anymore.” He nodded and I stepped over to Sunggyu.

 

“Take care of Woohyun. He needs you.” He nodded at me before whispering a thank you. I left the dorm and met up with Hoya, who was waiting for me outside.

 

“Well, do you think this will work?” He asked me, worrying his lip between his teeth.

 

“Yeah, I do. It’s not going to be easy though, they have some pretty heavy matters to sort out. All I know is that two people that love each other that much can only live alone for so long. Let’s enjoy this night out together and hope for good news in the morning.”

 

He agreed, and we went into the night with the fate of our two members heavy on our minds.

* * *

A/N: So about Woohyun's bad habit... I feel like they have mentioned him being on a diet and sneaking food around on multiple occasions. I thought it would be a more natural progression for his character. I also liked the idea of Dongwoo being the one that quietly watches and notices something wrong.   
  
Okay so, I'm totally not the only person okay with the idea of these two hooking up in their trainee days, right? I mean, they are the oldest... they would be the first ones to get curious.. :) Also plus, Dongwoo is the MVP of this chapter for finding out Sunggyu likes Woohyun and managing to get them to finally talk about their feelings!


	7. honesty

My heart was racing. Sunggyu wanted to talk to me privately. I had no idea what to expect so I just stood there afraid, waiting for him to make the next move. He was standing in front of me, one hand on his hip and the other running through his hair. He looked so nervous, and I didn’t know what to do with myself. I wrapped my arms around myself, hoping it would form some sort of barrier, that it would make what he was going to say next hurt less.

 

He started the first real conversation we had in months. “I’m not sure the best way to do this, so I’m just going to start. After speaking with Dongwoo, it is apparent to me that we have issues that we need to sort out.” I opened my mouth to demand to know what Dongwoo said but he immediately stopped me.

 

“Please, just let me finish Woohyun. Let me try. To explain from the beginning.” He was walking closer to me now, the look in his eyes so troubled as he led me to the couch. He was looking at me, talking to me, and touching me. It felt so overwhelming after all this time. I was powerless under this newfound attention; he was in control of this situation. I nodded to prompt him to continue.

 

“Getting accepted into the company wasn’t easy for me. I had to fight for them to notice me, and try twice as hard to stand out. When I got selected for Infinite, I was told that I would be the voice of the group. I was so excited and hungry for the chance to be important. I allowed myself to be optimistic for the first time since I moved to Seoul. And then you showed up. When I first saw you I wasn’t too worried. You were too damn _pretty_ to be an actual threat to my level and style of vocals. But then I heard you sing, and I felt like the world was falling apart around me. It wasn’t fair for you to be so beautiful _and_ so talented. When you walk into a room you have this presence; it’s just undeniable. Everyone notices it and respects it. It’s not that way for me. People have to be around me or get used to the idea of me before they can like me. So when you showed up looking the way you do and singing so strongly I became afraid. The company didn’t make it any easier on us. It was clear that we were in direct competition with one another. And I knew I was in a losing battle when my competition was you. That’s the real reason why I asked to be the leader. Because I knew that if I didn’t have that title, that I would always be in your shadow.”

 

I was taken aback. I knew how I felt during that time, but I had no idea that Sunggyu suffered like this all because of me. I knew he was stressed and sometimes cold to me back then but I didn’t know that I had made him feel so insecure.

 

“But it was decided that we would both share the burden of lead vocal. And instead of us working against one another, we began to work together. As a result of that, we became friends. And with time, you became the member I was closest to, the person that I leaned on the most. You became my best friend. And we told each other everything. But I kept a secret from you.”

He paused, looking like he was trying to gather his thoughts. “Just keep talking to me hyung. Don’t over think, just talk. I could listen to your voice all night.” I told him, just happy that he was opening up to me after so long.

 

“I’m gay Woohyun. I’ve never had any interest in women. I have always felt attracted to men. In high school I never acted on it, never felt like taking the risk. Then I came to Seoul and I was away from my parents. Finally free to express myself. My first kiss was during my trainee days with Dongwoo.”

 

“What?!” I had to interrupt. I never saw that coming.

 

“We didn’t have romantic feelings for one another. It was more like we both thought we preferred men over women, but didn’t have any real experience to be confident about our sexuality. We were attracted to one another yes, but it was more experimentation that both of us wanted. It only happened once, and before you even ask we didn’t sleep together.”

 

I nodded slowly, taking in this new information. “So why didn’t you tell me before? Did you not trust me to keep it a secret?”

 

“It wasn’t that. Dongwoo and I wanted to keep it to ourselves because we didn’t want to make anyone else uncomfortable. I also wasn’t sure if you would accept me if you knew I was gay. I didn’t want to risk having you end our friendship. I treasured it too much.”  
  
I couldn’t fight the heat that rose up in my body. “It hasn’t felt like it these past couple of months. You’re doing well without me by your side.”

 

We both sat in an awkward silence for a couple of minutes, unsure of how to breach the next subject. I finally spoke up. “We need to talk the party, don’t we?”

 

He was running his hand through his hair again. A nervous habit. It was very cute. “Yes. Can I go first?” I nodded, curious to hear how he felt since he was the one that walked away.

 

“I think I’ve always liked you just a little bit too much. But in my mind the possibility of you ever wanting me was so unbelievable that I didn’t allow myself to consider it. You’re so charming, and confident, and just beautiful. You are so out of my league. In relationships, you’re the guy with the power. You’re the one that the person is lucky to be with. You get to decide who you want. And I thought that you would never want me.”

 

He shifted a little closer to me. “Then one day we were sitting a café and you start telling me you want to be more than friends. Then that night you are locking me in a bathroom and kissing me like nothing else mattered. You told me that you wanted me so badly; I could _feel_ that you wanted me so badly. But you never said that you liked me, or that you had feelings for me. And that’s honestly what I wanted to hear. So even though that kiss made my knees feel _weak.._ Even though I wanted nothing more to let myself get lost in you.. to just not think and let go and let you do _whatever_ you wanted to me I had to stop it. I had to because I couldn’t allow myself to become your secret or your plaything. After everything we had been through together it felt wrong for us to just use each other in that way. So I walked away. And then we didn’t talk. And the longer we didn’t talk the more awkward it felt. You made excuses to leave anytime I entered a room. I didn’t reach out to you to repair our friendship. And then the space just felt too wide, like we had drifted too far from one another. And I’m ashamed to say that I probably would have let go on.”

“Then what changed your mind?” He moved off the couch to kneel down in front of me. He wiped tears from my face that I didn’t even realize were there. He took both of my hands in his and raised his eyes to meet mine.

 

“Because you have a problem Woohyun. And I love you too much to stay silent now that I am aware of it. Do you hear me? _I love you._ And I’m so sorry that I’ve caused you so much pain. I’ll never forgive myself for being the reason that you hurt yourself this way. And I don’t know how you feel about me..”

 

I shut him up with a kiss. I just wanted to touch him, to be close to him after all this time apart. I wanted to feel him kiss me back and physically feel the truth of his love for me.

 

“Woohyun we should talk more.” I shook my head. “I know we have a lot more things to discuss and I know that everything isn’t perfect between us. So I could tell you that my own stupid decisions have made things more complicated. I could tell you that if I could go back and do things differently I would. I know that I have a problem, and I realize that I won’t get better overnight. But with you by my side I know that I can achieve anything. So right now Sunggyu? Right now I get to tell you that I love you. And I get to hear you say it back. So I don’t care about the past and the mistakes that each of us have made. All I care about in this moment is being with _you._ So please, let me just have you. Let me just experience you for the first time as the man I love.”

 

We had sprawled out on the couch, and I was lying on top of Sunggyu. Our hands were slowly running all over each other. We were slowly kissing, and I had the silliest grin on my face.

 

“What is it Woohyun?” He was trailing his lips over my neck now, planting small kisses here and there.

  
“Nothing. It’s just… we have all the time in the world. There’s no rush.” He nodded, tilting his face back up temporarily to place his lips softly against mine.

 

“Yes. Which means that I get to take my time learning how to please you.” He was kissing me again, lazy and searching and absolutely perfect. When air became necessary, I broke away from him to whisper in his ear. “You’re so, so beautiful Sunggyu.”

 

Sunggyu was very vocal, which I found to be cute. He whispered sweet nothings back to me, things like _I love you_ and _you’re amazing_ and occasionally a _forgive me._ Sunggyu also had a thing for hair. He kept running his fingers through my long locks, pulling and tugging as he kissed me. He ended our kiss to stared at me and I felt the blush rise in my cheeks.

 

“What?” I asked sheepishly. “I just love your hair. I’ve always wanted to be the one to mess it all up. Sex hair was made for you.” I hummed in appreciation, allowing him to pull my head down for another quick kiss.

 

“I’ve always wanted to be the one to make a mess out of you.” I told him teasingly. “I want all of you.” It was his turn to blush now as I let his mind wander at the implications of my statement.

 

“We don’t have to rush Woohyun.” He told me sincerely. I hesitated. “We have already wasted months not admitting our feelings. I don’t want to waste anymore opportunities to be with you. Do you not want to?” He scoffed at this. “Are you serious? Of course I want to. I’m in love with you. But I don’t want to force you to do anything that you aren’t ready for.”

 

I choose this moment to grind our hips together for the first time, shamelessly rolling our erections against one another. “I think it’s clear what we both want Sunggyu.” I saw the look in his eyes change, and I knew I had won.

 

“We should probably relocate to my bedroom then.” I teased him. “Someone is unadventurous! We would miss out on a perfectly good opportunity to christen the couch.”  He chuckled lightly. “I don’t have anything against the couch. Hell we could reserve it for our second round. I’d just prefer to lose my virginity on an actual mattress.”

 

I pulled away quite abruptly. “Hyung, you’ve really never?” He gave me a small smile and shook his head. “I wanted to wait until I found the right person. Now I have. I will have no regrets giving myself to my first love.”

 

I squeezed his hand in response. “And I intend to be your last love Sunggyu. And for the record, I never have either.” I picked him up from the couch, encouraging him to wrap his legs around me.  Our lips were meeting again as I slowly carried him to his bed.

 

“Let’s take care of one another.” Sunggyu whispered as his lips ghosted over my ear.

  
“Yes hyung. Let’s.” I agreed as I slowly laid him down on the bed.

 

“I’m yours.” He moaned as I began to press against him a little harder.

I smiled at this statement. “I know.”

* * *

A/N: They finally talked to each other! HALLELUJAH!

 

 


	8. intimacy

I thought that Sunggyu couldn’t possibly get more beautiful to me, but then again I had never seen him like this. He was breathtaking, sprawled out on his bed underneath me, yearning for my touch. He looked blissful, clutching on any part of my body that he could get his hands on.

 

We helped each other out of our clothing, pausing every so often in our striptease to meet in a kiss. His fingers felt hot against my bare skin as he slid my top off. His legs shook in anticipation as I unbuckled his belt. I had never appreciated how long and shapely his legs were until I was pulling his tight jeans off.

 

I felt like I was meeting him for the first time, like he was this blank canvas that I got to draw on. As my hands traced their way across his body, I got to hear his moans of delight, the way his breath caught when I got to a spot of weakness. I got to learn where to press and pull to make him short of breath. All of this new information was overwhelming and exciting. _Sunggyu moans when I lick him here, his body shakes when I bite him there._

 

I discovered that Sunggyu was not the type to just lie there and take it. He was just as comfortable in control as I was. It wasn’t long before he was forcing my own back down to the bed, climbing on top of me to pay me back with the same teasing, pleasurable exploration.

 

He taught me lessons about my own body. I learned that Sunggyu’s tongue in my ear made my toes curl. That the press of his lips behind the back of my knee tickled in the most delicious of ways. That the feel of his sharp teeth against my hard collarbone made me gasp for air.

 

It felt beautiful. He made _me_ feel beautiful. It was all in his eyes. The way he looked at me was so special, so full of admiration and love. His gaze was no longer shielded by fear of rejection or misconceptions. He looked at me now like I was the only thing in the world that mattered to him. _And maybe I was._

 

“ _Woohyun._ ” He moaned out my name when I bucked against him. This was all so overwhelming. This entire day had been a rollercoaster. I woke up this morning with nothing and right now I felt like I had everything. But before tonight the last time Sunggyu had touched me was in that cursed hotel. And life since then had been so.. _hard_. He had pushed me away then and I had been crushed.

 

But now the only thing he was doing was pulling me closer. Fitting our bodies together like a glove, the feeling of his skin against mine making me ache. And I knew that he wanted me now, knew that he had suffered just as much as I did before. But even through the lust and the pleasure, I couldn’t deny that feeling of fear just beneath the surface.

 

I wanted to just give myself to him completely, to not think and just act. But the last time I did that, it had destroyed me. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, clutching them hard; trying to force away to doubts in my head.

 

Sunggyu was forcing our bodies apart, pulling my arms off him to put some distance between us. _Why? Has he already changed his mind?_ “Why did you stop?” I questioned him afraid.

 

“You’re crying Woohyun.” My hand flew up to my face, honestly surprised to feel the wetness against my cheeks. “Talk to me baby. I don’t want you to cry anymore, tell me what’s wrong.”  
  
“It’s just… I want this. I really, _really_ want you. And I want to be with you like this. Hell I’m the one who initiated this. But, now that we are here, and we are naked, and you’re rubbing against me like _that_ I can’t help it.. I just feel..” I was at a lost for words. I didn’t know how to explain what was going on. I wasn’t even sure if I knew.

 

“Scared?” He finished for me. “Woohyun, I stand by what I said earlier. I want you, all of you. But not if you don’t want to give all of yourself to me. We just confessed to one another. We don’t have to have sex to prove our love for one another. I don’t want to do anything you aren’t comfortable with.”

 

He smiled at me, and leaned down to give me a quick kiss. “It’s okay to be scared Woohyun. I’m scared too. I just found out that you feel the same way about me that I feel about you. And to be honest… I feel like I’m in a dream. I keep wondering when I’m going to wake up because it feels too good to be true.”

 

I gave his butt a pinch and was rewarded with a cute little yelp. I laughed at this, “Well, I’ve just confirmed that you are awake. All of this is real. My love for you is real.” I told him seriously.

 

He grinned at my words. “Wasn’t it you who said we have all the time in the world Woohyun?” I nodded. “Then we can take all the time we want to discover each other. Let’s take care of another for a while outside of the bedroom. Show each other how much we care with our emotions. And then later, once our relationship is more secure, when we’ve built trust in one another again….” He left the thought hanging, his fingers lightly running down my abdomen.

 

“This is very mature of us. Because a very, _very_ large part of my head wants to just say to fuck it and let you ravish me.”  I pouted, running my hands over his toned arms.

 

He laughed at my words. “Then I’ll have to ask you to stop thinking with the head below your waist.” He licked his lips. “I think it is the right decision for us to wait to go all the way. I want it to be a special moment for the both of us with no regrets.” His hand was tracing the area above my cock, his nails lightly scratching the sensitive skin. “But I would still like to give you some pleasure tonight. Help you with your... rather big problem.”

 

My cock was at full attention now. His hand was so very close to where I wanted it and he had just complimented my package and despite our serious conversation, I had never stopped feeling horny. I bit my lip at the ideas of how Sunggyu defined helping solve my _problem_ as he so eloquently put it. “I think that you’re the only person who has the answer.”

 

He laughed at my cheekiness. He moved to hover over me on all fours, his head bending down to whisper in my ear. “Have I ever told you how sexy you are when you are being greasy?” I had a witty remark on the tip of my tongue but I lost my train of thought when Sunggyu’s hand suddenly found itself wrapped around my cock.

 

It was kind of amazing how much more I enjoyed handjobs when it was he was the one responsible for the action. I always knew I liked Sunggyu’s hands. They were strong and capable, and my appreciation for them was growing immensely as I watched them work up and down my length. His grip was solid and his pace was steady and it was driving me crazy.

 

I caught his lips in a kiss, his mouth warm, wet, and so inviting. I ran trailed my fingertips down his back, enjoying the way he arched in response. He broke away to whisper for me to use my nails and I felt my cock get harder because he fucking _would_ like things a little rougher. I immediately complied, enjoying the new sound of pleasure that he made as I touched him.

 

“ _Fuck._ You look so hot like this. Your cock feels so good in my hand. I wonder how it would feel on my tongue?” I whimpered at this. I was already losing my mind with only his hand; I couldn’t even imagine how his mouth would affect me. At the same time, I was also male, and horny, and currently head over heels in love with the man on top of me, so I couldn’t really justify missing out on such an opportunity.

 

“Why wonder when you can find out?” I told him, admittedly shakier than I wanted. But it was kind of hard to be calm and seductive when I had images of Sunggyu blowing me running through my head and his hand had never stopped working me. He gave me a rough kiss, before making his way further down my body. Then his mouth was there, so close that I could feel his breath and it was the sweetest kind of torture.

 

“Look at me.” He demanded as our eyes meet again. “I can’t wait to taste you Woohyun.” He licked his lips, _literally_ licked his fucking lips in anticipation of sucking my cock. This did unfair things to my patience and pride and before I knew it I was begging.

 

“Please Sunggyu.” I asked nicely, but it wasn’t enough. “Please what?” He asked me teasingly. “I can’t give you what you want unless you tell me.” I rolled my eyes in frustration. When we had entered his bedroom I was clearly calling the shots, but through a series of ~~wonderful~~ unfortunate events he had me completely under his spell. It was so unfair that he still had the ability to keep his composure, and make real sentences, and be so god damn seductive while I was trapped underneath him, a mere panting mess.

 

He looked so obscene straddling my legs; one hand supporting his weight while the other continuously pumped my cock mere inches away from his open waiting mouth. I started making my demands. “Blow me.” He responded by blowing softly on the tip of my member. “Quit playing, and lick me already.” His tongue darted out to lick the bead of precum leaking from my tip. “ _Ugh,_ put it in your mouth.” He smirked and wrapped his lips around my member, but didn’t do anything else. Fuck pride and fuck subtlety. “Damn it, Sunggyu! Fucking suck my cock, you are killing me with all of your teasing. I can’t take it anymore. I need you.”

 

He chuckled at my words, and I wanted to be angry at his torture but he was really, _really_ good at this. Also plus when he chuckled with my cock still in his mouth, it resulted in lovely vibrations. He must have decided that I had experienced enough agony, because he was greedily sucking my cock now. His soft, plump lips looked pink and wet as he bobbed up and down. His fist was at the base of my length and he was slowly taking more and more of me inside his warm mouth. I wanted to praise him; to tell him how beautiful he looked and how wonderful of a job he was doing, but I was too far gone. Luckily he was more than happy to talk enough for the both of us.

 

“You like that don’t you? You like fucking my mouth?” My fingers were twisting in the sheets, trying to stay grounded to reality. I could only whine in response. “You glad that I’m doing this to you? Do you want anyone else?” I groaned, shaking my head in protest. “Look at your cock, how hard it is. Do I turn you on? Is this all for me?” I was whimpering now, my hips rolling to try to gain more access to his beautiful mouth. “Do you want to come for me Woohyun?” This time I was able to groan out a harsh yes. I was so close, and he was very attentive and absolutely fucking perfect. I didn’t want to close my eyes, we had kept our eye contact throughout this whole exchange. But he gave me a particularly hard suck and I couldn’t help it because I knew that I was _there_ and things as simple as breathing seemed impossible.

 

I managed to call out his name as my climax hit me hard, and I thought I would never recover. Sunggyu had swallowed every drop of me, his hand still slowly pumping me to help me ride out my orgasm. He was sliding up my body, letting me experience the taste of myself on his tongue as he kissed me..

  
“Thank you.” He whispered to me, and I was slightly confused. Shouldn’t I be thanking him for the best oral stimulation in the history of my young life? “For what?” I gasped out, still unable to get a handle on my breathing. “For everything.” He answered simply.

 

I could feel the exhaustion of the day taking over my body. I felt emotionally and physically drained, and I wanted nothing more than to give into slumber. He moved behind me and turned me to the side, wrapping his arms around me to bring our bodies close together. He reached down to pull out a blanket, and settled it over us.

 

“Sleep with me?” He asked sweetly, kissing my cheek. I nodded to him, snuggling closer to his body heat. “Only if I can wake up next to you.” I told him, nuzzling my face into the palm of his hand.

 

He turned my head to give me one last kiss. “Always.” He told me and I thought my heart skipped a beat. We both feel asleep that night with smiles on our faces, more content than ever before.

* * *

The morning after I had woken up to the smell of chocolate chip pancakes, courtesy of my sweet boyfriend. _Boyfriend._ It still felt strange and exciting to get to call him that. I wasn’t even hungry, but I couldn’t deny the touching gesture of breakfast in bed. He had praised me for cleaning my plate, and I praised him for his cooking skills. I knew he was watching out for me, trying to help me overcome my problems in his own way. It made me love him even more.

After finishing breakfast, and more than one make out session, he called the members to give them the okay to return home. After everyone showed up, Sunggyu held an emergency meeting to reveal our relationship. I was a little surprised that he wanted to tell all the members, but he simply responded that he didn’t want to do anything half way with me. _We might have to hide our relationship from the public, but at home everyone will know that Woohyun is mine and how much I love him. We would appreciate if all of you would support our relationship and continue to take care of us._

It was probably the sweetest thing I had ever seen, him acting so nervous in front of the other guys but determined in his mission to defend our romance. We had nothing to worry about though, the guys jumping up to swiftly envelope us in hugs and congratulations. Dongwoo, being the crybaby he is, broke into tears at the news of our relationship. Hoya gave me a knowing smirk before bringing me in for a special embrace. Myungsoo quietly congratulated us with hugs, while Sungyeol hopped about screaming about how he knew there was something going on between us. Sungjong kissed us both on the cheeks, telling us how happy he was that his hyungs had found love.

It was then that I realized just how _special_ of a thing we all had together. The seven of us were family, and seeing their reactions to everything just solidified how much we meant to one another. I couldn’t imagine what my life would be if Infinite wasn’t in it. I was thankful for the love and friendships that I shared with each and every one of them.

After the commotion had died down, the maknae line declared that they were stealing Sunggyu from me. Sungjong had decided that the leader needed a makeover, now that he had a boyfriend to impress. Myungsoo, being the fashion king he was, demanded that Sunggyu hand over his card so he could take his style to the “next level”, whatever that meant. Sungyeol winked at me, stating that I wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off Sunggyu once they were finished with him. Sunggyu looked to me in what could only be described as pure horror at being at the maknaes’ disposal, and I decided to send Dongwoo with them to make sure he came back to me in one piece.

I gave my Sunggyu a kiss on the cheek and made him promise to be good before handing him over to the other members. I was happy that this gave me the opportunity to have some alone time with Hoya, so I could discuss the details of yesterday.

“Damn. That sounded hot as fuck.” Hoya held up his fist to pound mine, and I couldn’t help the fit of giggles that took over me.

“Always so articulate Hoya. I know who to go to the next time I need help writing a love song for my baby.” He rolled his eyes at my joke.

“Seriously though. I’m proud of you guys for working things out! And for deciding to wait, there is no way in _hell_ that I could ever do it but hey, I am impressed at your self-restraint.”

“I really thought we were going to. Like I totally brought it up to him and everything, but once we were in the moment it just felt kind of rushed. Luckily he felt the same way so I didn’t disappoint him.”

“Well, I don’t know if I would say that.” I looked at him puzzled. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, I am totally happy that you finally got some action from Sunggyu that didn’t involve a laptop. Welcome to the normal life. But if what you described is all that happened last night, then Sunggyu got the short end of the stick.  First he gave you a hand job, then a blow job, successfully got you off and you preceded to pass out without returning any of the favors.”

“Wow. I hadn’t really thought about it that way… Oh my gosh I’m the worst boyfriend ever. I can’t believe I was so selfish! Everything just felt so good and overwhelming and I swear it was like the longest day of my life, I couldn’t _not_ fall asleep!”

“Trust me, if Sunggyu was super unhappy about it, I don’t think he would have brought you breakfast in bed, and followed it up by an adorable confession to the members. I’m sure that after all the drama you’ve had, he probably just wanted to make last night about your pleasure. I’m just saying next time, you should probably at least touch his dick.”

I swatted him on the arm as he laughed at my shortcomings. “You know that I hate you sometimes right?” He chuckled and swatted me back. “You know that I am trying to make you a master of seduction right? And that would require you to get over your fear of the penis.” I wanted to laugh, but he had kind of hit the nail on the head. I chewed my lip nervously.

“Wait a second. Is that why you didn’t do anything to him hyung? Are you afraid of the D!?” He yelled dramatically.

“Quit making fun of me and offer me help damn it! You are supposed to be my love mentor not my tormentor!”

“Ohh, that rhymed. I’ll have to remember that the next time I’m writing sexual lyrics for Dino. He has a thing for my rapping voice. Says it really turns him on, and..”

“FOCUS!” I yelled at him, fake choking him to regain his attention.

“Okay, geez! Apparently princess needs the conversation to revolve around him. So back to you being afraid of the dick. Is it really big or something? I've always kind of wondered what the leader was packing..."  
  
“Hoya don’t put it that way! I need advice, seriously.” I pouted. He waited. "Fine, you perv. He has a beautiful cock. It appears to be slightly shorter than mine, but it looks thicker. So he's well endowed okay? Why does matter?"

He smirked. "Just had to make sure that I'm still the biggest dick in the group."

"Well, that goes without saying Hoya." He smacked me on the head. "Ouch! Way to prove my point!" He repeated the action and we both laughed.

He pulled me up from the couch and led me to his bedroom. He made a show of throwing open the door. “Step into my office, Mr. Nam.” I really wanted to say something snappy back, but he was kind of the master so I let it go. He closed the door behind us and we got comfortable on the bed. “So talk to me. All kidding aside, I’ll be serious now.”

“I’m not really sure how to put it. It’s not like I’m afraid of actual penises, but more of what I have to do to Sunggyu’s penis.” Hoya stared at me confused. “Okay, let me try again. If last night is any indication, Sunggyu has _skills_ in the bedroom. Which is totally unfair, because his only experience is like Dongwoo so I’m not sure how the hell he is so talented. Maybe he is a sexual genius, like he is just magically good at all things erotic.”

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Like he’s just too good at everything. Like I’ve never came so hard in my entire life.”

“I’m referring to the part where Sunggyu fucked my boyfriend.” _Oh fuck._ I had been so caught up in my ranting that I forgot that the Donggyu hook up was supposed to be a secret.

“Wait, no! You’ve got the wrong idea! They totally didn’t have sex. I know that for a fact, remember I told you that Sunggyu is a virgin.” I tried to salvage the situation, but I could tell by the look in Hoya’s eyes that this was not good.

“Then what the fuck did you mean by his only _experience_ is Dongwoo?” Yeah, I was totally screwed.  
  
“Hoya, it was in the past! Like in their trainee days. Sunggyu even told me that he didn’t have any romantic feelings for Dongwoo!” Hoya scoffed at this.

“Is this the part where I’m supposed to feel better now that I know that Sunggyu used my boyfriend purely for sexual reasons with no actual feelings for him as a person?” Okay this was getting worse. This was bad, I was so, so fucked.

“Hoya, I’m sure it wasn’t like that! Look at them now, they are good friends! If one of them severely screwed over the other, I doubt they would be close now. Maybe it was just a one time thing, and then it was over!”

“Really Woohyun? Then tell me, how do you think that Sunggyu became so good at everything? Who do you think he practiced on?” Okay so, I hadn’t thought about it that way. Damn.

“Even if they did, it was before we were in the picture Hoya. Dongwoo didn’t cheat on you with Sunggyu. You’re the one that he is in love with. It's something from his past that obviously didn’t matter once he got together with you.”

“Then why didn’t he tell me? If he was just an old flame from before our time together then why would he keep it a secret? We’ve been together for years and he’s never mentioned it. You’ve been with Sunggyu for a day and he was honest with you.”

I really didn’t have a response to that. I knew that the situation was complicated, but I also knew that Dongwoo only had eyes for Hoya. I felt bad that I was caused this unnecessary friction for their relationship.

“I think that you just need to talk to Dongwoo about it Hoya. I can’t speak for him on the subject, I only know Sunggyu’s side of the story. What I do know is that Dongwoo loves you.”

Hoya shifted on the bed, obviously troubled by this new information but keeping a brave face for me. “I’ll have to discuss it with him later. Back to you. So you are worried about your inexperience being an obstacle when you try to please him?”

“Hoya. We don’t have to do this right now.  If you want to talk about..”

“Just leave it alone. Answer my question.” I sighed, unhappy that he was clearly ignoring the fact that he was upset. But I knew he was stubborn and wouldn’t talk to me about the subject any further.

“I guess I just don’t want to disappoint him. He pretty much told me that he has always thought about me… what if I don’t live up to expectations? What If I’m not good and he decides I wasn’t worth the wait?”

Hoya shook his head at me. “He’s not going to change his mind about you silly. He wouldn’t have told the rest of the guys if he wasn’t sure about your relationship. And the other stuff is a lot easier than you think. You have a partner that loves you and only wants to make you happy. As long as you guys are honest with each other, it will work out. Whenever you get the courage to touch him, just ask him how he feels. He will tell you what he likes and what he doesn’t. The rest will just come with time and practice.”

I nodded, reassured by his words. Hoya continued on. “I’ll even give you a couple of special pointers. You are my protégé after all… I’ll teach you how to drive him so wild that he’ll have no choice but to submit to you!”

“I don’t know if that’s necessary… I mean look at all of this that I’m working with.” I motioned my hand up and down my body. “Sunggyu is lucky to have such a sexy guy to call his lover.” Hoya pushed me off his bed, and I burst out laughing.

“Ya! Is this anyway to treat your protégé! I’m fragile!” I laid on the floor, acting as if I was unable to get up.

“So weak… how will you ever survive Sunggyu’s dick up your ass?” I jumped at these words, tackling him for a wrestling match as he laughed wildly.

“Hey! I am the one in control here!” Hoya shook his head, contradicting me. “I’m pretty sure all of your control flies out the window the moment he touches your dick. Talk about being powerless in a situation.”

We laid there teasing each other for awhile. I asked him my burning questions and he gave me his sexual advice. I left the conversation with a few tricks up my sleeve that I was dying to try out. We mostly just enjoyed each other’s company while we had some free time.

I excused myself to go to the bathroom so I could set a plan into action. I pressed the call button on my phone and waited for an answer.

“Sup?” Dongwoo answered on what could have been the last ring.  
  
“Dongwoo, I told you not to make your favorite songs your ringtones! You get caught up in your jam and almost forget to answer the call!”

“Ya, I did answer! So what do you want! Now Sunggyu’s pouting because you called me instead of him.”

I laughed, imagining the image of a pouty but cute Sunggyu. “I’m going to come meet up with the boys so we can go out to dinner. I’m sure the Sunggyu will be super excited to show off his new look. But you should come back to the dorm for some time with Hoya. He said he wants to be alone with you for a couple hours.”  
  
  
“Yeah, okay! I’ll just take a cab home right now.” I asked him to give the phone to Sunggyu so I could tell him a quick love you before I ended the call.

I went back to Hoya’s room to hang out with him until I heard the front door opening. “Stay here Hoya! I’ll go check it out!” I ran to meet Dongwoo in the living room.

“Okay so I lied.” I was in a rush, I wasn’t sure if Hoya would stay in his room or not.

“Huh? What are you talking about?” Dongwoo asked me perplexed as he removed his shoes.  
  
“So I know that you and Sunggyu hooked up.” His eyebrows rose, and he looked speechless. “No, I’m not mad at you. I know it was in the past so don’t feel bad about it.” He nodded, still silent.

“The problem is, I kind of accidentally let that information slip to Hoya.”

“What? Accidentally? Fuck. _Fuck.”_ I reached out to rub his back, trying to offer some slight support.

“Sooo.. yeah. Hoya’s pissed. He’s acting all jealous and insecure and stupid. And I tried to talk to him on your behalf earlier, but he wasn’t having any of it. So I’m going to talk a page from your book and meddle. I’ll keep the guys out in the city for a while. You and Hoya can talk this out in private.”

All the color had drained from Dongwoo’s face. He looked lost and scared and I suddenly felt like a terrible person for my big mouth starting this situation in the first place.

“Hyung, don’t forget. Even if he is angry with you right now, he still loves you. Anything negative or mean he might say is coming from the fear of losing you. He just thinks that you kept it a secret from him because Sunggyu meant something to you romantically. Just go be honest with him.”  
  
Dongwoo looked at me incredulously. “Oh, so you and Sunggyu have talked for a day and suddenly you are the giver of relationship advice?” He was pulling at the hem of his shirt, and he looked so nervous to go face Hoya.

“Yes, I am a ridiculous person for trying to lecture you. But I’m right about this. Go talk this out now, don’t ignore it and let it became a colossal fuck up like I did.” I steered him in the direction of Hoya’s room. When I opened the door I saw the look of surprise on his face.

“Look who’s here Hoya! I’m going to go meet up with the rest of the guys for dinner in the city for a couple of hours! And Dongwoo just so happened to show up here to spend time with you. And I told him that I accidentally told you about the Sunggyu incident! So have fun talking it out! Bye!”

I left the dorm quickly, hailing a cab as I called Sunggyu for their current location. “Hey babe, where you at?” I asked him.

“I’m at that salon Sungjong always goes to downtown. I’ve been here for _hours._ I’ve been waxed in places I didn’t even know I needed waxed!”

I giggled at his antics. He could be such a diva. “Well, tell me where you are so I can come save you.” As I laughed with Sunggyu I thought about the two boys I left behind at the dorms. I hoped they worked things out and quick. I felt bad for Dongwoo, he had a lot of explaining to do…

* * *

A/N:  
   
Things are finally happening!


	9. meddling

When Woohyun let the little secret slip, I knew that I was angry. But seeing Dongwoo now, face to face, made me realize just how pissed I was. He was standing awkwardly in front of me as I sat in bed, shifting his weight between his feet, rolling his hands in his lap. He looked so nervous and beautiful after his salon trip and the fact that I noticed even now just made me more upset.

 

“Hoaegi…” I scoffed at this. “Really? You lie to me about hooking up with one of our _members_ for fuck’s sake, and the first thing you have to say to me is a pet name? Classic.”

 

Dongwoo stared at the ground afraid to meet my eyes. “I’m sorry, okay? I’m so sorry. I just… I don’t even know where to start.”

 

“You could start with Hoya, I’m sorry that I’ve been a secret keeping bastard for the entire duration of our relationship. Or maybe even Hoya, I’m sorry that I’ve built our relationship around lies.”

 

He looked close to tears now, and in my current state of pain it made me glad to see him suffer. “Hoya you know I didn’t do this to hurt you! You know how much I love you!”

 

“Do I? Because I thought what we had between the two of us was special. Something that only _we_ shared. And now I get to find out not from you, but Woohyun that you screwed around with Sunggyu?! And don’t even say that it didn’t mean anything to you, because if that were true you would have told me. Like how Sunggyu told Woohyun after I don’t know, five minutes into their relationship. Just admit the reason you didn’t tell me is because you had something to hide!”

 

“Hoya, I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you the truth from the beginning! And I have to say that it didn’t mean anything because that’s the truth! Christ, if I was secretly in love with Sunggyu why would I have pushed him into Woohyun’s arms?! And last time I checked, you made out with Woohyun while we were together!”  
  
“Don’t you fucking dare try to compare what I did in front of your face to what you’ve done behind my back. I’ve never made you question my loyalty to you, so don’t you dare try to turn this around on me.”

 

“Hoya you know you’re the only man I want. You are the person that my heart beats for. I’m sorry that I hurt you, but this doesn’t change how I feel about you at all!”

  
“Well maybe it changes how I feel about you.” He raised his head to look at me now, for the first time since the argument had started.

 

“Hoya I know you are angry right now, but you don’t mean that.” He looked so scared, eyes so big and wet as he stared at me.

 

“I will not be _anyone’s_ second choice. Ever.” He was shaking his head at me. “Hoya, there is _no one_ for me but you. It isn’t a matter of ranking, because there is no other competition. You are my _only_ choice. Please if you only believe one thing I say tonight, please believe that.”

 

“Then why keep it from me? Why tell me that your first kiss was with a drunken stranger when in reality it was Sunggyu? Why did you let me think that I was the man lucky enough to discover all of you when you had already given it to Sunggyu?”

 

The tears were falling down his face now. “Hoya it was before we were even together! It was before we had even revealed our feelings to each other. It was only one time and it didn’t mean anything.”

 

“Well it means something to me. I want to know _everything._ I want you to tell me every single detail.”  Dongwoo held his head in his hands. “What do you want to know?”  
  
“How did it start Dongwoo? Did he ask you to be his whore or did you offer?” He cried harder, stumbling back to support himself on the wall.

 

“Hoya please…” I wasn’t having it. “Answer me!” He took a moment to compose himself. I knew I was being harsh but I needed to hear this.

 

“It was when we first joined the company, before Infinite was even a concept. You know we were all trainees at the same time, it was natural for us to become friends since we were the same age. Then we became closer and started to share more personal things with each other. After a particularly hard night of practice, we were drinking afterwards together. It was just the two of us, and somehow it came up. My memory is a little hazy of the details, but he confessed to me that he didn’t like girls. The next day when he was sober, Sunggyu tried to play it off like it was the alcohol talking. But I told him that he didn’t have to hide it because I was the same way. And it was liberating for the two of us to be able to talk to each other about something that we had been hiding from everyone for years.”

 

“Yeah I know it feels liberating. That’s how I felt when I thought me and you were having that conversation. Now I know that it was just a rehearsed _fake_ conversation for you. But keep going, you have yet to answer my question.”

 

He tried to wipe some of his tears away. “I wish I had something elaborate to tell you but I don’t. It was simple. We were good friends and we were curious. We trusted each other enough to experiment. Neither of us had any romantic feelings for the other. We wanted to get rid of the first time awkwardness without any expectations. So that’s what we did. We were each other’s first kiss and we got a little handsy. We only fooled around a little bit. Then we continued on as friends and eventually got placed in Infinite. So we decided it would be for the best if we just kept it a secret, so no one would feel awkward around us. And that’s really the end of it.”

 

I let my mind process this information. It really had only been once and it was before we were even a couple. So why was I so angry with him? Why did I feel so betrayed? Dongwoo had kneeled down in front of me. He laid his head in my lap and hugged my knees.

 

“I’m not really jealous of Sunggyu. Rationally, I have to accept the fact that those things happened before you were my boyfriend. That’s not the part that really hurts me.”

 

“Then what is it Hoya? Just tell me and I promise I’ll try to make it up to you.” I wiped away a couple of tears that had stubbornly made their way down my face.

 

“All this time I thought that I was your confidant. That I was the one you came to when you started to have those feelings. I thought that I was a big part of you discovering yourself. I believed that I was the first person you told about your sexuality. It made me feel special, like you trusted me more than anyone else. I assumed that I was the first man to get to be intimate with you. And now I’m realizing that I was wrong. That it was all a lie. And I’m not saying that you aren’t allowed to have a past, or that I expected you to be pure as the driven snow. I wasn’t before we got together. But you _knew_ that because I told you. I was honest with you and you were never honest with me Dongwoo. And that _hurts._ ”

 

  
“You’re right Hoya. I wasn’t honest with you, and that was wrong of me. I was scared to tell you how I felt back then, so I found a way to breach the subject with you without risking too much. I know now that if I had just been honest with you from the beginning, we could have a much easier path. I’m so sorry I hurt you, and that I’ve made you doubt your trust in me.”

 

He got up to sit next to me on the bed. “But you need to remember that since you’ve entered my life you’ve been the most important thing to me. You’re like my sun, and my entire existence revolves around you. So even though you weren’t first in those matters, you were my first and _only_ in so many other important things.”

 

He grabbed my hand and laced our fingers together. “You were the first person I held hands with on a haunted house ride. The first person I rode a two seater bike with!” I cracked a smile at that one. That was back in our rappers got married days, before we had confessed. “You were the first person that I made kimchi for. The first person I ever stayed up all night with just talking. The first person that I wore a purple thong for.” I laughed out loud, the sound even surprising me.

 

He moved closer to place a soft kiss on my lips. “You were the first person that I kissed in the rain. The first person that made my knees feel weak.” He was sliding into my lap now, leaning over to whisper in my ear. “You were the first person I let mark my skin. The first person I let dominate me. The first person I let be inside of me.”

 

I grabbed his chin, moving his face to bring his lips to mine. I initiated the kiss, wanting to just _feel_ him for a little while. When we broke apart he reached up to hold my face and stare into my eyes. “You were the first person who made love to me. You are the first and _only_ person that I will ever give my heart to. You’re the man that I fell hopelessly in love with.” He smiled at me, and I felt my heart skip a beat.

 

“So if you are ever feeling sad about the past or if you question my feelings for you.. just remember all that. Acknowledge that you are the person that I’ve chosen to be with. Remind yourself that we’ve got years to make even more memories together… to have new “firsts”. So please Hoya. Forgive me and help me to be a better man. Love me for who I am, even though I might make mistakes and hurt you sometimes. Love me anyway because I love you.”

 

I ran my fingers through his hair, humbled by his heartfelt speech. While it was true that he had hurt me today, I couldn’t ignore the fact that it was accidental. Sunggyu was his past, and I am his future. He had been faithful to me ever since we became official. All relationships had their ups and downs, things that needed to be worked on. I realized that I should be thankful that I have a man that is so willing to be there for me, and work on himself to make me happier. I understood that I was lucky to be with him. Why waste my energy fighting him when I could make the both of us happy?

 

“What am I going to do with you?” I asked him, pushing his hair out of his face so I could see his beauty with clarity. He bent down to rest his forehead against mine. “Make me yours?”

 

Our love making felt different this time. It wasn’t frenzied or desperate, but it was unique. We had undressed slowly, mainly because the two of us refused to stop kissing, only breaking apart to pull off the necessary garments. Nothing felt rushed; I prepared him at a leisurely pace. Normally he would beg me to hurry, to get inside him, to stop teasing. But this time he just laid back and enjoyed it; clutching my shoulders as I stretched him, our lips never stopping their dance.

 

I felt his moan of pleasure as I entered him. Our hips rocked together unhurriedly, just enjoying the sensation of giving and receiving. His hands had shifted to tangle in my hair as he arched underneath me. I had one hand on his hips, controlling the lazy pace of our coupling, while the other was wrapped around his head directing our kisses. When we broke apart for air we would just stare at one another, just smiling enjoying the moment.

 

We didn’t talk much, which was unusual for us. Tonight, we both felt that words weren’t necessary. We both wanted to convey how strongly we felt for the other purely through our actions. I’m not sure how long it lasted; time seemed to have no meaning for us. But soon enough Dongwoo was leaning up to tell me how close he was, how he wanted to do it together. We fell apart at the same time, the pleasure overwhelming and wonderful.

 

He asked me to stay inside of him, told me that he wanted to keep me close. We laid together in the bliss of the aftermath for a little while before I spoke to him again.  
  


“I know that I get angry, and that this won’t be our last argument. But I also know that I will _always_ fight for you, even if it’s not easy. But it’s worth it, because I’ll be with you. And that’s all the motivation I need.”

 

He nodded, hugging me closer. He didn’t need to say anything, because I already knew. Worn out from our activities and the emotions, we had no energy to meet back up with the others. As I started to drift off, I noted another memory for us: the first time I fell asleep inside him.

 

* * *

  
  
I decided to just have the guys meet me at the restaurant, so I could get a table ready for us. It was the weekend, so I knew it would be pretty busy inside the place. I had chosen a fondue restaurant, because I knew how much Sunggyu liked fruit. I also figured that watching him dip said fruit in chocolate would be stimulating to say the least. He would also want to ensure that I ate something, and would be forced to feed me which would _totally_ turn him on. If my plan worked I’d be trying out some of Hoya’s tips real soon. I smiled at my own genius.

 

It wasn’t long before I heard the noisy arrival of my friends. I didn’t see Sunggyu with them so I was puzzled. “Hyung, I have to cover your eyes so you get the big reveal.” Sungjong said to me sweetly. I decided to play along, bending down so he could temporarily blind me. Sungyeol and Myungsoo made a drum roll on my thighs, and I laughed because sometimes the cuteness of the maknae line was too much. Sungjong sang out Ta-Da! (it was his trademark after Beatle’s Code) and I opened up my eyes to see my boyfriend.

 

I wasn’t really expecting the boys to give him a real makeover. I figured they might shop a little bit and get pampered, but Sunggyu had actually switched up his style. His hair was no longer the honey brown, now dyed to be more of a reddish color. It was shorter now too, not even covering his ears. It was choppy on the top and tousled, giving him this sexy bed head look. His pants were a tight black material, coupled with a far too low cut white tee. I mean, I could see his clavicles _and_ a little bit of his sternum. He had on a nice leather jacket paired with black combat boots. To summarize, he looked sexy as fuck. If I weren’t so sure that Hoya was busy with his own drama tonight, I would have seriously thought he forwarded that Rocker Gyu fanfic to the maknae line.

 

I was openly checking him out and he had the cutest little blush on his cheeks as he waited for my reaction. We started to make our way to the table, and I slid up next to him. “You have no idea what is in store for you when we get home _boyfriend._ If we didn’t have such a bad history with bathrooms, I might have decided to drag you in and ravish you.”

 

He chuckled, running his hands through his hair as we walked. “Well the only way to get rid of bad memories is to make new ones right? But you have to eat dinner first before you get rewarded.” I shook my head at him as we sat down next to each other. This manipulative man was going to be the death of me.

 

Since we were in the public eye, I couldn’t hold him the way I wanted to. I was forced to just sit next to him, occasionally squeeze on his thigh or the hand. I was having a good time with all the guys, and the food was delicious but I felt desperate for Sunggyu’s attention.

 

He, on the other hand, was having a grand old time teasing me. Licking and chewing and _moaning_ in appreciation of the taste. At one point he even purposely got chocolate all over his hand, just so he could lick it off in front of me. He didn’t feed me though, merely ordering me to finish my plate because the food tasted _so good._ I was beginning to regret my decision to bring him here, his antics only resulting in me with an uncomfortably tight feeling in my pants.

 

I thought ~~torture~~ dinner was never going to end, but eventually the server arrived with our checks. Sunggyu grabbed my tab with no hesitation. I found this to be ridiculously cute and chivalrous, and I had to force myself to not bend over and kiss him. He ended up paying for the other guys as well, saying it was his way of saying thank you for their help with his makeover.

 

We made our way out of the restaurant; I admittedly had a little trouble. Sungyeol had even teased me, telling everyone to slow down since I was having a _hard_ time. Sungjong didn’t get it, so Myungsoo told him to keep his innocent eyes away from my crotch. Sungjong made an a sound of recognition, before stating that he knew Sunggyu’s new look would have a strong impact on my thoughts. I decided to retract my previous statements in my head about their cuteness and loving them. Together, the three of them were pure evil.

 

Sunggyu laughed all of it off as he hailed us a cab. We all climbed in and he found the seat next to mine. He leaned over to whisper in my ear. “You’re not the only person who has been frustrated tonight. Being away from you for so many hours, then getting to see you but not being able to touch you the way I wanted…” His tongue darted out to lick my ear before his teeth bit down on the lobe. I had to bit my lip and strongly remind myself that we were in the back seat of a cab with three other members and I definitely could _not_ react. “I’ve been wondering… do you think you’ll like my new look without the outfit? Maybe I won’t have the same effect on you with my clothes off.” I scoffed on that last statement. “I guess the only way to know for sure is for me to strip for you when we get home?”

 

All of this was too damn much. _He_ was too damn much. “Can’t we drive any faster?!” I groaned out frustrated. Sunggyu leaned back to put some distance between us, biting his lip and _leering_ at me through those dark lashes.

 

“Just when you thought he had calmed down, new problems arise…” Sungyeol joked, much to the his lackeys’ delight. Sungjong even high fived him. “Hyung, the next time you go out with your boyfriend, maybe you shouldn’t wear such tight pants.” How had I ever thought his smile was cute and innocent! Those two idiots had officially tainted our maknae. I sent them death glares, too dignified to respond to their verbal jabs.

 

“It’s kind of interesting though. I always thought Woohyun hyung would be the aggressor. Now we know that Sunggyu hyung's leadership qualities extend to the bedroom. He’s been making him suffer all night, he definitely comes out on top.” Myungsoo chimed in with a smirk.

 

Okay life was not fucking fair. How was it my fault that I had a sexy boyfriend who was making it his mission to torture me tonight in public?! How was I less of a man for getting excited when the person I was being teased by looked like _that_? I tried to sputter out a retort, but the unjust laughter of the _maknaes_ of all people made my brain short circuit. Thankfully, we had arrived at the dorm so I could escape their judgmental stares. I pouted as we waited on the elevator, my ego bruised by their taunts. When the elevator arrived, I wordlessly went to the back.

 

We were about halfway up to our floor when Sunggyu suddenly pressed the emergency stop button. The four of us just looked at him in bewilderment. “In reference to your earlier statements, the one getting fucked will be me. And if you had seen his cock, you would understand why I would gladly submit to him. So your comments are irrelevant, especially considering the fact that the three of you are most likely to bottom out of all of the members.” All of our mouths fell open in shock because _damn._ That was blunt to say the least. He pressed the button and we were moving again. No one said anything else. Then as the doors opened, he turned around to toss me a look over his shoulder. “I’ll be waiting for you in your bed baby.” Then he strutted inside the apartment like he owned the place.

 

I smiled to myself, because he didn’t have to make a point to do that in front of them. But the fact that he did just made me love him that much more. I looked up to make eye contact with the other guys, and they were giving me looks of admiration. I flipped my hair cockily as I exited the elevator.

 

“Damn you guys are hot together!” Sungyeol raised a fist to pound mine before dragging the other two behind him. The others mumbled sorry while trying to keep their eyes above my waist. It was my turn to laugh at them now. Sunggyu definitely deserved to be rewarded, and I wasn’t going to keep him waiting. I made a quick pit stop in the kitchen, before making my way to my bedroom.

 

Sunggyu, not one to disappoint, was already in my bed waiting for me. And if his shoulders were any indication, I had a feeling that he was bare underneath my covers. I hid my surprise behind my back before placing it next to the bed. Then I slowly made my way over to him.

 

“While it was very sweet of you to stand up for me in the elevator, it doesn’t change the fact that you have been taunting me all night.” I leaned over to finally give him a kiss, delighting in the way he tasted after so long.

 

“No, it doesn’t. Perhaps you should teach me a lesson Woohyun.” I fisted the covers and pulled them off of his body, letting my eyes rake over his naked form. He was already hard for me, and he looked so beautiful sprawled out in front of me like this.

 

I moved to the edge of the bed away from him and started to get undressed. I took my time, slowly unbuttoning my shirt, easing my zipper down lazily. By the time I had finally rid myself of my clothes, he was panting, beckoning me to come closer. I crawled on all fours to place myself on top of him, meeting his mouth in an open wet kiss. I pulled away just as quickly, relishing in his disappointed moan. I leaned down to grab my surprise, enjoying the way his eyes widened in lust when I revealed it to him.

 

I rested my weight on my heels as I straddled him, shaking the whipped cream teasingly in front of him. I sprayed a little bit into my mouth, obscenely licking my lips at the taste.

“Challenge accepted baby.” Tonight I would quite literally make a mess of him. 

* * *

A/N: thanks for reading :)  
  



	10. payback

He looked so lovely laid out underneath me, patiently waiting for his punishment. I would take my time with him tonight; show him that I was just as capable of driving him crazy.

 

“Lift your arms up, and hold on the headboard. Don’t let go unless I tell you to. That’s the rule.”

 

He followed my orders, scooting up further on the bed to comfortably rest his arms without disobeying me. “What happens if I let go?”

 

I smiled at him innocently. “Then I’ll be forced to stop touching you. And we wouldn’t want that, would we?” He shook his head. “I’ll play nice for you Hyunnie.”

 

I let my hands explore him: his chest, his thighs, his lips, _him_. I let myself get reoriented with his body, while I internally planned my attack. I decided to start with his mouth. I sprayed a little of the whipped cream into my own before leaning down to capture his lips in a kiss. I found that it tasted even sweeter on his tongue, and I pulled away to spray some more on his lips this time. I purposely used too much, making his face messy for my own enjoyment.

  
I quickly moved to lick the portion that was starting to slide down his jaw, before retracing my path to his lips. He was starting to pant underneath me, and I decided to journey away from his mouth. I pushed his head to the side and sprayed a line down his long neck, right on that strong tendon.

 

“Did you know that you belong to me?” I asked him before lazily licking up the sweet substance. I did it slowly, flattening my tongue on his skin before dragging it up and down his neck. When he didn’t answer me quickly enough I let my teeth bite down on the tendon sharply.

 

“ _Yes._ ” I moved up to kiss him, and when he was starting to get into it I abruptly moved away. I felt the way his legs shifted in annoyance. I gripped his hair, tugging his hair back to fully expose his neck for my teasing tongue. I sprayed some more cream on his now prominent Adam’s apple. I enjoyed watching it bob up and down as he tried to control himself.

 

“Already impatient Gyu? We are just getting started baby, you should just relax.” I saw him bite his lip to hold in his retort. I realized that he was always used to getting the last word, being the deciding factor is most aspects of life as the leader. I liked taking that away now, making him submit to my whims. I wanted him to be overwhelmed the same way I was in our previous encounter.

 

I let my tongue circle his Adam’s apple, cleaning up the traces of the cream. Then I licked a path from there all the way underneath his chin to push my tongue in his mouth again. He eagerly joined his tongue with mine, trying to get as much of the sweet taste and _me_ as possible before I slipped away again.

 

I wound my hand around his neck, applying some pressure but not hard enough to cut off any circulation. “I never realized how sexy your neck is until just now. Maybe I should just stay here...” He groaned, because he liked the attention I was giving him, but he knew he couldn’t ask for more this soon. I made sure to leave him with more than a couple of marks to remember me by before deciding to explore further.

 

“Your body is so sharp and hard, made up of all these beautiful lines that I can draw on.” I used my free hand to keep his head in place, and accentuated my point by spraying a line down the side of his jaw. I started at the tip of his chin, slowly dragging my tongue all the way up his jawline. I was next to his ear now, so I whispered some teasing thoughts to him.

  
“I wonder what other solid body parts I could find..” He subconsciously rolled his hips, but I wasn’t going to give him relieve that easy. “These are hard..” I traced my fingertips over his collarbone, “maybe I should taste them too.” I covered the bones with the cream, then took my time savoring the taste as I noisily lapped it up. “What do you think baby? Should I mark you here too?”

 

He whimpered out a yes, and I sucked harshly along his clavicle, turning his skin a beautiful angry color. I bit down harshly on the opposing side, enjoying the sudden moan of pleasure he released at my harsh treatment.

 

“These are stiff now too.. Such a pretty color and so responsive to my fingers..” I lightly scraped my nails over his nipples, which I knew to be one of his weak spots. I pinched down hard on the nub, and he started to get a little louder. I tugged on the tip, pulling it away from his body and twisting it. I delighted in the mixed groan of pleasure and pain this got me. “Don’t whine love, you know I’ll kiss it better.” I immediately latched my mouth onto the nipple, rolling my tongue soothingly over the abused flesh. I circled the nub, then flicked my tongue back and forth over the tip. My hand moved to play with one nipple while my mouth took care of the other. I kept my pace slow, knowing that it was driving him wild.

 

My mouth let go of his flesh, and he groaned out his discontent. “Look at me Sunggyu.” He had his head thrown back, eyes closed but now he opened them for me. “Do you not like what you see? Should I stop?” I knew he did, but I wanted to hear him say it.

 

“I love what I see. It’s almost too much.. It’s hard to watch you tease me like this but I don’t want you to stop.” I hummed in acknowledgement, covering both of his buds with the white substance.  
  
“But if you close your eyes, you won’t get to see me do this.” I held his eye contact, slowly licking the cream off his chest before making my way over to the other one, repeating the action with a drawn out moan. I decided that I needed to show this nipple the same _appreciation_ I showed the other. I used my teeth this time, pulling the tip harshly between my lips. He let out a little yelp and something that sounded suspiciously like fuck.

 

“You’re so worked up baby. I haven’t even got to your cock yet.” This seemed to put things in perspective for him. Probably because he knew I had never touched his cock before, and I was pretty much offering to do it with whipped cream for his viewing pleasure.

 

“What do you want me to say Hyunnie? I’ll say it. Please don’t tease me anymore. I need you to touch me there.”

 

“Touch you where? The last time I checked I’ve been touching you everywhere from the moment we started playing. Are you not satisfied?” I was evil, but it was worth it to see his writhing and begging.

 

“My cock. Please touch me there Woohyun,  I need to feel you there. I’ve imagined it for so long, don’t make me wait anymore.”

 

“You’ll remember my rule?” He nodded enthusiastically. I leaned up to give him a kiss, and I let this one drag out. He was kissing me with such passion and desire, it was hard for me to break away. But I knew that I would make him even happier with my next moves, so I reluctantly pulled away.

 

“You know I love you right?”

 

“ _Yes_ , and I love you too. I’ll be good I promise now _please._ ”

 

I made a show of crawling my way down his body. “I guess you deserve it.” He was too wound up anticipating my next move to think of a comeback. I got comfortable lying down next to his legs. I ran my hand dangerously near his erect cock, and blew softly on it just to make him squirm.

 

“I wonder how long it will take me to make you scream my name.”

 

“ _Fuck,_ I will scream it right now.” I had to laugh; he was just too damn cute when he was being needy. “I meant in pleasure, not frustration. Just relax and let me play okay?”

 

He gave me an incredulous look and I blew him a kiss before getting to work. I used my thumb and forefinger to lightly stroke him. “Such a lovely cock. Are you hard because of me?” He nodded, his eyes glued to the motion of my hand.

 

“Talk to me baby. Tell me how you want it.”

 

“How about I show you so we can do it together?”

 

I chuckled, he was sneaky but I wasn’t easily fooled. “But that would mean breaking the rules. Nice try though.” He growled his disagreement but I ignored him. “I want to hear you love; your words turn me on. Tell me how you’d like me to stroke your cock.”

 

His tongue peeked out to wet his lips. “I want to feel your entire hand gripping me.”

 

I reached out to grasp his cock at the base, applying a small amount of pressure to gauge his reaction. I started to pump his member, gently moving my hand up and down his length.

 

“ _Harder._ I was to see that arm _flex_ as you jerk me off.” I smiled, an idea popping into my mind. I moved up from my sprawled out position to get up on my knees. I folded my legs and sat down, letting my weight rest comfortable on my feet. I swept in for a kiss, missing the taste of his tongue. I caught his bottom lip between my teeth as I pulled away. He moaned and his legs shook slightly, eager to see what I had in store for him.

 

“If you close your eyes I stop. Don’t forget that once I start touching you.” He nodded and I grabbed the underside of his thighs to push him further up on the bed.

 

I held his cock steady at the tip, then draw a nice line down the underside of his shaft with the whipped cream. Then I spread his legs widely. “You better keep these legs wide open for me, you understand?” I enjoyed his look of confusion; he didn’t know where I was going with this. “I will.” He answered obediently.

 

I moved up closer to him, the top of my thighs forcing his legs deeper in the mattress. I took a moment to admire his flexibility in my head. I was almost bending him in half as I rested my weight on one of arms next to his chest. The position felt almost primal; me hovering over my prey as he willingly opened himself up for me; I felt my own cock twitch at his willing submission, so I went in for the kill.

 

I lined up my member with Sunggyu’s, grasping both of our cocks together at the same time. The sweet substance served an alternate purpose as a lubricant, allowing me to easily slide my hand up and down our shafts, working the two cocks with my one hand.

 

“ _Shit Woohyun, that feels amazing. Fuck your cock feels so good against mine.”_ It took him a while to say the words due to his frequent gasps and moans. I had to agree with him though, this felt far too good. It was thrilling knowing that the two of us were feeling the same exact sensations, my hand working the both of us into a frenzy. His cock felt hard and wet against mine, and the friction I got from his member made my own thoughts waver.

 

There was something about the sight of our two cocks rubbing together that was just _kinky._ It was arousing to see the differences between the two of us as I continuously stroked our lengths. I noticed things I never had before, like how Sunggyu’s head was thicker with a pinkish hue. My head was more tapered with a darker, purple tone. Since Sunggyu was paler than I was, I could see the veins circling his member. _God,_ I had never just appreciated cock until he came in my life. But the more I stared at his, worked my hand over it, felt it against my own, the more I wanted it.

 

I wanted to have complete control over it; to be able to make him hard, to make him twitch, to make him release. I needed to be capable of making him feel the level of desire I felt every time I looked at him. I stole a glance at his face; his eyes were locked on my hand, following the repetitive motion as I pleasured us.

 

I squeezed harder, making my grip firmer just because I knew he would like it. He was really starting to lose it; I could see the blood on his mouth from biting his own lip too hard in the heat of the moment. He was gripping the headboard so harshly that his knuckles were turning white.

 

“ _Sunggyu._ ” I called out to him, wanting his eyes on mine when we both reached our breaking point. When his gaze fell on mine I felt my lungs temporarily give out. The look in his eyes was so heady; full of lust, longing, and _love_. And it was all for me. He looked at me like I was the only one who could save him from this, which was true in a way.

 

“ _I want..”_ He was trying to speak but I was stroking faster and he was losing his train of thought. There was nothing else to look at right now but each other’s eyes. I hoped that he saw how strongly he affected me in my gaze.

 

 _“I need.._ ” He didn’t have to say anything else because I understood. We were both so close to getting what we wanted. Our hips seemed to be moving subconsciously, the two of us thrusting into my tight grip.

 

“Together.” I told him, and I knew he would recognize what that meant. He was so beautiful, he was in his element like this. I wanted to watch his eyes change, I wanted to watch him fall apart with pleasure. I needed to him to only think of me. He needed to crave my touch, to never desire anyone else. I wanted to him to come with my name on his lips.

 

His face was so near my own; I could feel has harsh panting from below me. His eyes were starting to tear up, but I knew it was from the pleasure. Even with all the lust in the air, I couldn’t deny the intimacy of this moment. The look in his eyes was so honest, so full of need and I knew it was for me.

 

I would claim him every single night we had together in one way or another. I would never allow him to forget what my touch could do to him, or how well I tended to his needs. Now that I had experienced this side of him, I would never let him go. This would be the first time I made him come, and the knowledge that it would be far from the last pushed me over the edge.

 

“ _Now._ ” I commanded, and with an audible shout he followed my lead. We climaxed together, and I leisurely pumped our lengths as we came down from our high.

 

“ _Oh, Woohyun. Oh god.”_ He kept repeating to himself as he rode out his orgasm, and I’d be a liar if I said I didn’t love the way my name rolled off that tongue. I swept the hair out of his face, letting my fingers lightly trace over his features. I saw the glistening skin where his tears had fell. I wiped them away, and left kisses in their wake. Soon my mouth made the journey back to his, and we kissed softly for a little while.

 

“Please tell me those were tears of joy at my sexual prowess..”

 

He laughed, burying his head in my shoulder without giving me an answer. I bit at his ear playfully before rolling over to cuddle up to his side. “Give me an answer.”

 

“Yes? And no? I don’t know. I just feel.. _a lot_ right now.”

 

“You’re not making much sense babe.”  
  


“Yeah, that’s usually a side effect of a mind blowing orgasm. I’m just really happy okay?”

 

I kissed him on the cheek; I understood exactly what he meant, because I felt it too. “Okay.”

 

I moved to grab a couple of tissues and cleaned the both of us up. I got on top of him again to tangle our lips together. I ran my fingers through the newly shortened hair, happy that there was still enough length for me to grab him by the auburn strands. I kind feel my cock begin to stir at the sensual contact.

 

“So… can you handle more or is Grandpa Gyu a one and done kind of guy?” Sunggyu tried to knee me, but I just laughed and dodged.

 

“Don’t call me that in bed ever again. It is the opposite of sexy.”

 

I giggled at his silly pride. He could deny it all he wanted, but he was Infinite’s grandpa. “You didn’t answer my question.”

 

“I want more of you.” I smirked, happy that I got the response I wanted.

 

“I was thinking that you’ve been such a good boy. You followed my orders, you’re still holding the headboard like I told you to. So maybe you deserve a reward.”

 

“What did you have in mind Hyunnie?”

 

“Well you haven’t got to play with the whipped cream. And you haven’t gotten the opportunity to touch me because of the rules. But since you’ve been so good, maybe I should let you touch me with that mouth of yours. Perhaps I should let you tell me how good my cock tastes covered in dessert?”

 

He got kind of a dazed look on his face for a second, but he was nodding his head. I teased him when I realized that he was probably imagining it in his head, and he couldn’t deny the appeal of my proposal. He rolled his hips upward, catching me off guard.

 

“Well it looks you’re already excited. If you let me have a taste I promise I’ll make you harder.” I didn’t bother to play hard to get, I knew what that tongue was capable of and I was a fan. I moved to kneel in front of him, my knees on either side of his chest, my cock at the perfect height for his mouth.

 

“You really don’t want me to use my hands?” I rolled my hips slightly, my cock bumping into his chin. “I’m sure you are creative enough to make it work without them Sunggyu.”

 

“Then you set the pace then, move my head for me.” I nodded, then sprayed a line down my erect cock and waited for him to make his move.

 

He lifted his eyes up to connect with mine before opening his mouth up wide. This was quite the visual, so I wasted no time teasing, choosing to get straight to business. My fingers found their way into his hair again. I slowly moved him back and forth on my cock, and I was shamelessly turned on by the controlling act.

 

Sunggyu pulled his mouth off my member, and I was about to protest. His intentions were made clear when he leaned down lower to capture one of my balls in mouth. I let out a surprised curse, but it felt pretty damn good so I stopped complaining.

 

He chose to switch to licking, going slowly up and down the length of my shaft with the tip of his tongue. By this point he had already licked off all the whipped cream, but that didn’t stop him from telling me how good I tasted.

 

I loved watching him suck my cock. That bruised lip looked even redder stretched around my girth. I grabbed his hair tighter, enjoying the vibrations from his unrestrained moan. I don’t know why I lost my patience so quickly, but it wasn’t long before I was shoving him back and forth on my cock.

 

All of his words were mumbled and incoherent now; I didn’t give him enough time or freedom to fully release my cock from his mouth. I used my other hand to pull his jaw down, making him open his mouth even wider. I pushed all the way into him now, not stopping until I felt my cock hit the back of his throat.

 

His mouth was heaven, and I didn’t want this to end but I could feel my release already nearing. He was just so damn good at this; I couldn’t control my intense reaction to his ministrations.

 

My mind ran over the events of the night again, and I allowed myself to remember all the dirty details. My eyes traveled over his neck and chest; I had left multiple marks on his beautiful pale skin. He was all mine and I loved it. This made me more excited and I was there.

 

“I’m coming Sunggyu! Fuck!” He increased the pressure of his mouth, his throat swallowed every last drop of my release greedily. He gently sucked on my member as it softened in his mouth, rolling his tongue lazily around it as I enjoyed the aftershocks. After gaining my bearings again, I slowly slipped out of his mouth. I moved down to kiss him again, trying to express my thanks without words.

 

I moved my hands to pull his own off the headboard. He had done so well, never once breaking his hold throughout our entire session. I massaged his arms, trying to work some circulation back into his stiff limbs. I loved him for being such a good sport. I loved him for listening to my demands. I loved him for following my rules. But most of all I loved him for loving me back, so I told him so. We exchanged sweet nothings for a while, just holding each other as we let our bodies return to a normal place after experiencing so much lust. When I noticed his eyelids dropping, I decided to call it a night.

 

“I hoped you’ve learned your lesson Sunggyu.”

“And what lesson was that?”

I squeezed him close to me. “Payback is a bitch.”  
  
He just chuckled, snuggling up close to me. “But it’s _so_ worth it.”  
  
  


I started to turn him around but he stopped me. “I want to be big spoon. I haven’t been able to touch you with my hands this whole time. I want to be able to feel you with my hands and hold you as I fall asleep.“

 

I just rolled my eyes at him, because that was probably one of the most adorable things he had ever said. I gave him his kiss goodnight, and happily feel asleep.

 

* * *

I made my way into the kitchen, my infinitely hungry stomach craving a late night snack. I padded my way through the living room, and flipped the light switch in the kitchen to find something to go with my cookies. What I was not expecting to find was a half naked Sungyeol bent over in front of me, looking through the fridge. I must have surprised him when I turned on the light, because he dropped the milk gallon he was holding.

 

“Fuck Myungsoo! You scared me!” He picked up the jug hastily, trying to save the milk.

 

“Here let me help you.” I grabbed a couple of paper towels and bent down to help him mop up the mess. It didn’t take long between the two of us, and soon we were tossing the used rags in the trash.

 

I ran my fingers through my hair nervously. “I’m sorry I surprised you. I was just hungry and I wanted some milk to go with my cookies.”

 

 “Seriously?!” His sudden screaming kind of caught me off guard.

 

“Well yeah. It’s kind of a ridiculously good combination since _forever_. Why am I weird for liking milk and cookies?!”

 

He laughed in that ridiculously high pitch of his. “You’re not! That’s why I’m here too!” He got off the floor and I really tried to keep my eyes away from his cute little ass but I failed. He returned momentarily with a bag of Oreo’s to prove his point. I showed him my chocolate chips.

 

He looked me up and down, as if assessing my worth. “Double chocolate chunk?”

 

“Of course. Double stuffed?” I fired back.

 

“Is there any other option?!” Then we collapsed into giggles together, on the floor in the kitchen like we were kids.

 

“Double, double. We are quite the pair aren’t we?” I asked him rhetorically.

 

“Yup. It’s like we were made for each other.” Then Sungyeol threw me one of his trademark gummy smiles, and I thought I would faint because I wasn’t really expecting an answer and I had a soft spot for his gums.

 

“Well the bad news is that I spilled like half of the milk when you surprised me.” Sungyeol admitted shyly.

 

“That’s okay. We could share… hang out for a while…” I tried to throw it out there nonchalantly.

 

“Duh! I’ll get us a glass!” I put a stop to this; my body did not need another eyeful of his behind.

 

“No it’s cool! You’ve already gotten up once, I got it.” I moved to grab us a cup, and then got situated again. We were resting with our backs against the fridge. I could feel the cool surface through my shirt, which meant Sungyeol must be cold. I snuck a peak at him and sure enough, his nipples were hardening in response to the temperature. Oh dear lord, I needed to redirect my attention and fast. I ripped open my bag and starting munching.

“So what are you doing up this late Myungsoo? You parted ways with me and Sungjong earlier cause you said you were tired.”

 

“Well I was! After I showered I had every intention of going to sleep. But it was kind of… difficult to.”

 

Sungyeol gave me a knowing glance; we lived in the room next to newly formed Woogyu couple. “So Sunggyu is pretty vocal in bed huh? I could hear him too from Jongie’s room! I’m sure it must have been _deafening_ for you.”

 

I just laughed awkwardly. “Yeah, he’s pretty noisy. I tried to tune it out with headphones, but it didn’t work. So I figured I would grab a snack and hopefully they would be done by the time I finished eating.”

 

“Well good luck with that one, we all know that Woohyun’s got stamina.”

 

I stole another one of his Oreo’s as I laughed. “How would we know that?”

 

“Because of the abs! If he’s willing to work out in the gym then you can bet he's willing to work it in the bedroom.”

 

I just shook my head at him. “You’re such a perv Sungyeol. This is all partly your fault, you just had to make Sunggyu buy those leather pants.”

 

“Hey, we all agreed the leather pants were a necessity! They made his ass look like it was a gift from the gods. And I saw you check it out as we were leaving the restaurant so don’t even.”

 

I scoffed scandalized. “It doesn’t count! I’m pretty sure he undid his shoelace on purpose just so he would have an excuse to bend over in front of Woohyun. And I just so happened to be in the line of fire.”

 

Sungyeol tried to comfort me. “It’s okay Myungie. We all know you are an ass man.”

 

I really, _really_ wished I could think of something to say in response but I was so flabbergasted that I had to change the subject.

 

“Whatever! What are you even doing right now? Where are your clothes?” I had been focusing on the cookies so I wouldn’t stare at him.

 

“Well I accidentally fell asleep in Jongie’s room. And he refuses to use a fan, cause he’s afraid he’ll get a cold or something so it’s like ridiculously hot in there. So I just started stripping.”

 

Oh well that explains everything. It’s totally just _okay_ to rip off your clothes and parade around the house like it’s no big deal. Sometimes I hated my life. Especially because something had just happened to make Sunggyu scream loud enough that we heard it in the kitchen. I couldn’t stop myself from blushing if I wanted to.

  
When I looked at Sungyeol he seemed mischievous. “What do you think they are doing in there Myungie?”

 

“I really, _really_ don’t want to know!” The conversation kind of stopped there. Sungyeol had obviously wanted to talk about not safe topics, and I had shut him down. I kind of felt bad for ending the topic so bluntly, but I really couldn’t handle contemplating sexual things with Sungyeol in his _boxers_ sitting only an inch away from me.

 

Soon we ran out of cookies, and we both decided that we should try to go to bed. Sungyeol decided to just come back to our room. It wasn’t long before the two of us were tucked into our separate beds.  
  
  
“Hey.” I heard Sungyeol call out to me.

  
“What?”

 

“Have I ever told you that I have the most fun with you?”

 

I smiled to myself. “No.”

 

“Well I do. You’re the only person who I’d be willing to hang out with on a cold kitchen floor in my boxers.”

 

“You’re the only person I’m willing to share my food with.”

 

Sungyeol laughed, because he understood how big of a deal that was for me. “I’m glad that I'm the only one special enough to get your goodies.”

 

I felt that heat rising in my cheeks again as I blushed. “Goodnight Yeollie.”

 

If the light had been on, I would have seen him smile. “Goodnight my Myungcookie.”

 

I wanted to nag him for calling me such a silly name, but he just had to throw in that possessive pronoun. In the end I didn’t say anything, just happy that the two of us could share another inside joke. And deep down, I did kind of think the nickname was adorable. I closed my eyes and let my thoughts be dominated by the choding until I fell asleep.

 

* * *

A/N: Enjoy.  


 


	11. surprises

I opened the door to let in the other members. The room got exponentially louder as the maknae line filed in. “Ya, you said there would be snacks hyung!” Myungsoo complained. “Watch your tone! Dongwoo should be here any second.” We were staying in a nice hotel in Los Angeles, and we had texted the boys to meet up in our room after midnight. True to form, I heard someone kicking the door and I opened it up again to greet my boyfriend whose hands were full with snacks.

 

“Sorry I’m late guys! There wasn’t much selection in the lobby downstairs, so I just made us some instant ramen in the microwave. But it’s the thought that counts!” Dongwoo smiled, carefully handing out the hot cups of noodles to us. The five of us got comfortable on the oversized king bed.

 

We were actually in America during our first international trip, shooting the biggest music video production of our careers. Destiny was an amazing song, and we knew we had a hit on our hands. The concept was the complete opposite of our previous comeback, Man in Love. Gone was the prince image, we would reinvent ourselves with a manly, charismatic performance. This song was more my style, and we all had fun tweaking our image to fit into the new concept. The coordi noonas had also supplied my baby with a police hat that gave me a lot of interesting ideas involving things like handcuffs and batons. It didn’t help that the majority of our outfits looked like they belonged in a bondage runway show. I tried to focus my mind on the task at hand, instead of planning my imminent roleplay session with my lover.

 

Sungjong spoke up first. “So what’s with the emergency late night meeting?”

 

“Yeah, what’s with all the secrecy? And why wasn’t Hamstergrease invited?” Sungyeol asked curiously.

 

“We are sneaking around behind their backs because this meeting is about our two lovebirds!” Dongwoo announced happily. The Jung brothers seemed intrigued, but Myungsoo just kept eating. It was hard to keep his attention once food was introduced to a situation.

 

“The reason we have called you all here today is because…” I paused for dramatic effect; all of their eyes were staring at me hungrily. Sometimes I just liked being the center of attention. “Woohyun wants to fuck Sunggyu.”

 

A sudden chorus of yelling and eye rolling ensued, the maknae line getting up from the bed to make their way to the door. “Wait, why are you guys leaving?!” I was confused by their sudden mutiny.

 

“You got us all excited for nothing! Everyone already knows that idiot!” Sungyeol quipped.

 

“Seriously hyungs, I gave up my beauty sleep for this? You know how much I need that, especially with this new haircut that doesn’t even cover my eyes!” Sungjong whined. Myungsoo just gave us a silent look while shaking his head in disapproval.

 

Dongwoo got up quickly to force the boys to sit back down on the bed. “Wait a second! Hoya’s speech sucked, let me try to explain.” I rolled my eyes, but decided to let him have a try.

 

“What Hoya was trying to say before he got all vulgar was that Woohyun wants to _make love_ to Sunggyu.” The youngest made sudden noises of understanding and willingly got comfortable on the bed again.

 

“Seriously? He just said the exact same thing I did, he just replaced fuck with make love!” I complained.

 

“Yeah, and it sounded way better his way! Your way was too obscene hyung.” Sungjong said disapprovingly.

 

“Whatever plan you have, you should just let Dongwoo explain. I’m way more receptive to him right now.” Sungyeol chimed. I wanted to pull my hair out; these kids were too good at trolling.

 

Dongwoo bit his lip, obviously trying not to laugh at my expense. “Hoya why don’t you try to explain in a charming way why you have come to this conclusion about Woohyun and Sunggyu.”

 

I huffed, but I decided to go along with it. “Well, as I was saying before I got so rudely interrupted… Woohyun is finally ready to... _seal the deal_ with Sunggyu. Despite the evidence of the deafening noise levels of their activities that you all have experienced at the dorm, there has actually been no penetration of the leader.” My eyes found Dongwoo’s, he gave me a thumbs up for my less explicit explanation.

 

Myungsoo finally spoke up. “So what makes you think that they are ready to take things to the next level?”

 

“Furthermore, why does this have anything to do with us? Me and Myungsoo bought earplugs _months_ ago if that’s what you are worried about.” Sungyeol asked.

 

“Well, based on my conversations with Woohyun lately, he is ready to go all the way. When they first got together, they made some pact about how they would wait or some bullshit.” Dongwoo shot me a glare. “I mean, they wanted wait until the timing was right. They wanted to get closer as a couple before they actually had sex. During the flight here, he pretty admitted that he wanted more but didn’t want to just do in the heat of the moment.”

 

“That’s actually very mature of him. We have supported the hyungs with their decision their whole relationship.” Sungjong said, the others all nodding.

 

“Yes, and we never pressured them or made fun of them for their decision.” Dongwoo said this, but all eyes turned towards me.

 

“What? I didn’t give them any sass about their lack of sex life and their constant state of unfulfilled desires.” I tried to defend myself, but no one bought it. “Okay fine, maybe I teased them a little bit. But it was all in good fun! And because I knew I would never be that strong to hold out, Dongwoo is just too fucking good at..”

 

“Alright, back on topic!” Dongwoo cut me off to avoid more potential embarrassment. “To answer Sungyeol’s earlier question, the reason we are here is to help the two of them. We all know how real Woohyun’s greasiness is, and the fact is that Sunggyu loves it, no matter how much he tries to deny it. After waiting this long, it would be kind of silly to just randomly do it. Woohyun is a real romantic guy, and he has told me that he wants his first time to be really special.”

 

“Sunggyu hyung would feel the same. He would want the night to be memorable.” Myungsoo chipped in.  

 

“Ah, I get it now! It’s up to us to come together to plan them a romantic evening that’s worthy of such a monumental decision!” Sungjong guessed, and Dongwoo clapped happily. I scoffed at the general mushiness of all this, but I really did want the best for our hyungs.

 

“Yes! It’s time for us to pay back our lead vocals for everything they have done for us! We have to think of something awesome for the two of them.” Dongwoo stated.

 

“If you think about it, this is perfect! We are in America, sure we have fans here but the city is so big and crowded that we are way less likely to be noticed. They could actually go out on a date here!” Sungyeol was starting to get excited.

 

“I know that we will be busy here because of all the schedules the managers have planned for us. We have to find a way to work around that, to give them the best date possible.” Dongwoo said.

 

I spoke up. “Furthermore, we already have the perfect set up for the act to go down. They are already assigned to sleep in the same hotel room. It’s different, it’s special, and most importantly…. the walls are sound proof.” The maknae line erupted in cheers, extremely excited for the possibilities.

 

“Wait, how do you know the walls are sound proof?” Myungsoo asked suspiciously.

 

“Cause I’ve already tested it out.” I said with a smirk, much to Dongwoo’s disapproval.

 

“Hoya, please _focus_ on the topic or you won’t be testing out anything once the guys leave. Do you understand?” Dongwoo said exasperatedly.

 

“Hyung, I think he’s trying to tell you that if you keep referencing your sex life, you won’t have one.” Sungyeol said with a grin.

 

I shook my head at the injustice. We were, after all, planning how to get two other members laid as we spoke. “Fine. Anyone have any suggestions that they think will work?”

 

“We could steal one of their room keys! While they are gone on the date, we could decorate the room. Rose petals, wine, the works!” Sungjong threw out his idea, and we all agreed.

 

“In order for this to reach it’s maximum potential, I think it would be best if it we kept it a surprise. Like a scavenger hunt or something that leads them to all the fun parts of the city, and we can have the last clue take them back to the hotel. After a great day together they come back to find the perfect setting for such nighttime endeavors.” Myungsoo added thoughtfully. It was kind of funny that he was actually the mastermind behind most of our planning. Who would’ve thought?

 

“I think we should plan to have it our last night here… That why we can have the rest of the week to finalize our ideas.” They all agreed with me.

 

“They want each other, they want this. They just both are too romantically challenged to be able to pull off the right atmosphere without us. So what do you say guys… are you in for making their dream night a reality?” Dongwoo asked them, even though it was already obvious they were.

 

No one hesitated to agree, and we stayed up late that night excitedly discussing all the possibilities. None of us complained the next morning about the lack of sleep except the make up artists. Everyone got scolded for having huge bags under their eyes, but we couldn’t really bring ourselves to care.

* * *

This week had been such a rollercoaster. We were actually in _America_ of all places, shooting a video in a big set location that other groups could only dream of. It was such a culture shock; things were so different here compared to Korea. It was all so exciting and _new,_ and I couldn’t be happier that I was sharing it with my lover.

 

Things between Sunggyu and I had been amazing. We spent these past months falling even more in love; we were inseparable now. I used to think that I knew Sunggyu so well before we got together, but now I knew that I was only seeing the tip of the iceberg.

 

Since he became my boyfriend we grew so much closer. We talked about everything; we were each other’s support system. We celebrated the good times together, and comforted each other during the hard times.

 

Even though we were honest with the members, we couldn’t go public with our relationship. So public displays were nonexistent between us, unless it was under the guise of fan service. At first this bothered me, I always felt a pull towards him, and I wished I could proudly stand by his side. I never said anything to him about it though. One day I came home after an interview where I had to lie about my ideal type, pretending yet again that I didn’t have anyone special to me.

 

I was moping in my room about the injustice of the entire situation when Sunggyu showed up. He told me that he wanted to give me something to remember him by, to hold on to during times when I felt like he was too far away. He handed me a gold band with the infinite symbol on it, probably the same ring design that many of our Inspirits owned. _I had to pick something that wouldn’t cause suspicion if you wore it everyday, so I found an infinite symbol ring. It’s still fitting though, because without Infinite I would have never been able to fall in love with you. I’ve always told you it wasn’t the things on the outside that made me love you, but what was on the inside. I wanted this ring to represent that. Look at the engraving babe._

  
_It means that no matter where you go or what you are doing in life, I am with you. My heart belongs to you, and every time you leave a room you take it with you. I don’t want you to ever give it back; I want it to belong to you forever._

 

I remember bursting into tears. Only he would know how to fix my problem without me ever having to bring it up. He gave me a concrete reminder of his love that I could wear every day, without drawing unwanted attention or suspicion to my relationship status. Only the two of us would know what was truly on the inside of the ring, and that was part of what made it so special. It was a tangible reminder of how much I was loved. He didn’t have a matching couple ring, it would have been unnecessary even if it wouldn’t have tipped off fans to the true nature of our relationship. I was the one that needed the reassurance, not him. This was his way of being able to give me that security, even when he couldn’t physically do so.

 

Thinking of that night always brought a smile to my face, and I found myself fingering the ring while I waited my turn on set. Some of the other guys had wandered off to enjoy the small break, but I stayed behind to watch Sunggyu film his parts. The intensity in which he tackled his work was spellbinding to observe. The way he gave it his all, every single take. His beautiful voice really shined in this new song, and I couldn’t help but feel proud as I watched him work.

 

I felt a sudden slap on my behind and squeaked in surprise, almost spilling my drink. I heard a familiar laugh at my reaction. “Ya! I thought you were going to grab a snack or something with Dongwoo!”

 

“Well I was, but Dongwoo is in that damn commander hat again and I can’t trust myself to be alone with him right now, I might bend him over and fu”  
  
“I get the picture Hoya! And keep your hands off my ass.”

 

“Sorry, you know the only person I love messing with more than you is Sunggyu. I think his voice cracked when he saw me touch his _Woohyunnie_.”

 

I just shook my head at him. “You haven’t stopped trolling him since I told him we kissed.”

 

“Actually, I have _always_ trolled him. It’s just a little more satisfying nowadays. Plus it counts as mini payback since he put his hands on my dino.”

 

I laughed, taking another sip of the sweet latte. “And you claim not to hold a grudge.”

 

“I don’t. I just like seeing your boyfriend get flustered. And last time I checked, you thanked me for my antics. _Sunggyu gets a little wild when he’s jealous. He totally blowed me in that theater after we came out in couples shirts during the Ranking King awards._ ” He stole my drink, laughing at his own cleverness.

 

I stole it back before he could even taste it. “Last time I checked, _your_ boyfriend was the one who admitted on broadcast that he was jealous of our couple shirts. He even called them _pretty._ ”

 

“Right, and wasn’t it Sunggyu who gave Dongwoo a death glare on broadcast when you dedicated your couple shirt to my boyfriend, number 4 nim? And I don’t even think I have to bring up the 2Woo coffee date incident.”

 

“And yet you just did.”

 

“And that my friend, is how I win an argument.” He grabbed my cup again, took a long drink and handed it back to me empty with a satisfied smirk.

 

“You know that sometimes you are the person I hate the most right?” He just burst out laughing and attacked me with hugs.

 

“Take it back _Woohyunnie_ , or I’ll print off the latest fanfic you just subscribed to. Wasn’t it a prostitute fic? Maybe tonight your hamster will _tip_ you for your services _._ ”

 

Now I was attacking him, trying to regain my dignity. “Worst confidant ever, you are supposed to help me keep my secrets not use them against me! Why do I even deal with you.. you.. evil person!”

 

“Now, now. I don’t think it’s very nice to call the person who is getting you laid tonight evil.”

 

I momentarily paused my assault on his person. “What are you talking about?”

 

“Well since I am actually the _nicest_ person ever, I have taken it upon myself to give you all the tools necessary to steal our leader’s goodies. After our latest heart to heart, it is apparent that you are ready to claim your hamster. I’ve gotten the rest of the boys involved too, we all came together to plan the perfect evening worthy of virginity losing and sexual escapades…. You’re welcome.”

 

I was dumbfounded and yet entirely intrigued. “Details. _Now._ ”

 

“Nuh uh, you should know better than anyone that good things come to those who wait.”

 

My face fell into my hands, in despair by the unfairness of my life. “Hoya, you smug bastard quit messing with me! You can’t just drop a bomb like that and not give me any specifics!” I waited, but didn’t get an answer. I uncovered my face to find that I was standing alone. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket, and I opened up the text quickly.

 

_And that my friend, is how I effectively end a discussion._

 

Damn that dance machine.

* * *

Hoya finally rounded the corner and we all rushed up to him. He gave my hand a little squeeze and blew me a kiss. He was still trying to convince me to steal this hat before we left the set, but I was really trying to resist him.

 

“Don’t keep us waiting hyung! Was he into it?” Sungjong asked excitedly.

 

“Of course he was into it. I let him know about our plan without giving away any actual details.” Hoya stated smugly.

 

“So Operation HD is a go?!” Sungyeol questioned. He had demanded that we have a codename for our project just in case Woohyun or Sunggyu overhead any of our discussions. Sungyeol had deemed it Operation Hamster Deflowering, Operation HD for short.

 

Hoya did his dramatic pause thing again. “Operation HD is green lighted!” We all had a mini dance celebration at the news. It was finally time to put our plan in action.

 

We decided it would be best to divide and conquer. Sunggyu was too much of a control freak to actually let us do all work for him. No, we would have to distract him until the moment was right. We decided to put Sungjong and myself on team Sunggyu. He had a soft spot for both of us so we figured we could bend him to our wills. Sungyeol and Myungsoo would take care of Woohyun, the three chodings united. Hoya was on manager duty, mainly because the couple wouldn’t trust him enough to follow any of his instructions.

 

“Okay guys, all of our hard work was for this moment. We pushed ourselves really hard this week, and we have got the result we wanted! Once Sunggyu finishes filming his scenes, we will be done with all of the shooting in this location! This means that the romantic night on the town is achievable! Everyone has their phones ready to go, fully charged?” Myungsoo asked us, and we all nodded in response.

 

“I stole Sunggyu hyung’s room key while you distracted Woohyun.” Sungyeol happily informed us.

  
Hoya gave us his signature smirk putting his hand in the middle. “Then let the games begin.” We all put our hands in to join him.

  
“Fighting!”

* * *

After shooting wrapped for the day and the manager’s dismissed us, I was dragged away by Sungyeol and Myungsoo. I saw Dongwoo and Sungjong leading Sunggyu in the opposite direction. I wondered if this had anything to do with Hoya’s declaration.

 

“So are you guys going to tell me what the hell is going on?” I demanded.

 

Sungyeol just started laughing. “Trust me, you’ll thank us for this later! We just had to separate you guys for a little bit, but you’ll get to see your grandpa soon.”

 

The two of them ended up dragging me back to the hotel. They forced me to shower and get a little dressed up, still not giving me any new information. They actually made me show them different outfit options before they finally gave me the seal of approval. 

 

“You look good hyung. Now let’s get going already, we don’t want to keep him waiting!” Myungsoo grabbed my hand to drag me out the door while Sungyeol cackled.

 

I was jittery in the cab, I had no idea where we were going, and the two of them just kept smiling and giggling the whole time.

 

“Okay guys, you have to give me _something_ to work with here. Otherwise, what’s to stop me and Sunggyu from just escaping to do our own thing the moment we meet up?” I asked them. Their faces instantly fell.

 

“But… that would be no fun.” Sungyeol began to pout.

 

“Okay then tell me what the hell you guys are planning!” I wanted some answers.

 

“But part of the magic of the night is the surprise hyung.” Myungsoo pointed out.

 

“Sure, but all Hoya said was that you guys were going to do something that would help me get laid. Which, by the way, I think I could manage on my own. And I know from experience that Hoya’s definition of _helping_ is unconventional to say the least. Think of how you would feel in you were in my shoes! With him involved, you could be driving me to a brothel for god’s sake! A Columbian woman even enticed me earlier, is she in on this!?”

 

Myungsoo chewed on his lip for a second. “Ugh, fine. Since you’re being such a drama queen I’ll fill you in. And of course she wasn’t pabo!”

 

Sungyeol tried to convince him to stop talking. “Myungsoo don’t! We’re so close!”

 

“I’m not going to give anything away, I’m just going to put his mind at ease! Hoya told all of us that you wanted to sleep with Sunggyu but the two of you were sappy enough to want it to be really romantic. So we’ve been planning all week to give you guys a really special date. Right now we are taking you to a fancy restaurant to meet up with Sunggyu. He’s been with the other guys getting ready, like you were doing with us. So you have nothing to worry about, so shut up and just enjoy the ride!”

 

That shut me up. True to their word, they dropped me off in front of a nice restaurant in the heart of downtown LA. They wished me good look and told me to play along, no matter what. I didn’t really understand the last bit, but I figured the answer would reveal itself eventually. Once inside, the host immediately pulled me in to show me to my seat. Sunggyu was waiting there for me, and looking nervous and cute sitting alone. He got up to give me a quick hug when I reached the table, and we both sat down to make ourselves comfortable.

 

“I’m starving and I have absolutely no idea what’s going on. I was going to try to find you about we wrapped for the day, but I got kidnapped.” Sunggyu explained jokingly.

 

I laughed too, because the idea of Dongwoo and Sungjong being capable of kidnapping anyone was unbelievable. “It’s okay, I got kidnapped too. Our sons are getting crazier the older they get.” It was a joke between us. We called them our sons since we were always taking care of them.

 

A couple people came by and starting setting down different dishes in front of us. Sunggyu tried to stop them, which was hard considering the language barrier. They told us that our meal had already been prepared and paid for prior to our arrival.

 

“The kids actually buying me something? I like the effect America is having on them.” We laughed together, enjoying the different flavors of the food and each other’s company.

 

 “These are for you. Please open the larger one first.” A waiter suddenly appeared, holding two simple envelopes in my direction. At first I thought it must be a mistake, but then I realized it was probably part of the elaborate plan. I took the envelopes from the waiter and thanked him. Sunggyu was staring at me curiously, so I opened the first one to read the contents aloud.

 

_Did you know that Los Angeles is a place where wishes come true? In the city of angels, it is possible to make your dreams a reality. Follow our lead and you will be rewarded. But like all things in life, you must work hard to achieve your goals. Figure out our riddles to find your next clue. Guess correctly, and you will find true love waiting on you._

 

We both looked at each other with silly smiles on our faces. Sunggyu spoke up. “Ah, it looks like my kids couldn’t resist a chance to play. Let’s see what our first clue is.”

 

I was slightly surprised that he was willing to go on what could only be a wild goose chase, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t intrigued. After all, I had promised the boys that I would play, suddenly understanding what they had meant earlier in the cab.  
  
I couldn’t believe the level of effort the guys put in. It wasn’t just a couple clues here and there. There were actually riddles that we had to decipher in order to figure out where to go next. It was like Brain King all over again; me and Sunggyu against the world. We ended up spending the whole day together, exploring Los Angeles with our clues playing as our tour guides. Each place we went to was already paid for and set up by our members. We had gone on tours in Hollywood, shopped in Beverley Hills, and tasted authentic American food at the Farmer’s Market. We had been all over the city together, making memories and enjoying ourselves as a couple. It was extremely liberating to be able to spend time with Sunggyu like this without having to worry about being seen or having our picture taken.

 

Even now, we were holding hands watching the fireworks display at Disneyland. We rode a few rides, small ones admittedly because my grandpa was such a scaredy cat about such things, when we got approached.

 

“Excuse me sir, but this belongs to you.” A woman held out an envelope to us, and we took it excitedly. I think the both of us were enjoying this game a little too much. This time Sunggyu read it aloud.  
  


_This is your last clue of the evening. You have done well if you have made it this far, but trust us when we say your night is just beginning. The two of you have been in love and have taken care of one another since your respective confessions. Go to a place where you can show your lover just how much you he means to you._

 

“The hotel.” We both answered in unison. I squeezed his hand harder; I think both of us knew exactly what that meant, without having to say anything more.

  
The cab ride to the hotel was filled with a comfortable silence. I couldn’t take my eyes off him as we drove along in the night. All I could think about was the fact that we were about to take that final step, and he was truly about to become my lover.

 

Before I knew it were we standing in front of our hotel room door. My hands shook slightly as I pulled out the room key to enter our room. I felt Sunggyu’s hand fall on mine. He didn’t even say anything, but it was the reassurance I needed. _We are in this together; there is no need to be nervous._

 

I didn’t even recognize our room when we walked in. For a wild moment I thought that the management might have made a mistake and forgot to book it for us for another night.

  
“Woohyun.. look.” Hanging above our bed was a large sign.

  
  
The first invasion symbol with our names within it… I felt my heart start to beat faster. We were here, this was the last step.

“Come look at this.” He pulled me over to the nightstand where five hearts were waiting, each with handwritten notes on it.  
  
“A message from each one of them?” I asked, and Sunggyu nodded.

 

_To my favorite hyungs-  
Don’t the two of you always take such good care of me? I know as the youngest member, I can be a burden. Debuting during a time of such growth in my life was hard for me, but my hyungs always made it better. You were always there for me, no matter what. Now it’s your turn to lean on me! Please enjoy this night, you deserve all the love and joy in the world. I hope you enjoyed the sign. I noticed Woohyun always wears a Infinite ring on his finger. I thought I'd have this made in your honor. I chose the First Invasion symbol, because from the beginning you guys were meant to be. I hope this night is everything you dreamed it would be. Your one and only maknae- Sungjongie_

 

_Sunggyu & Woohyun-  
It’s been a long time, right? These past few years with you have been some of the best in my life. I know that sometimes I might not be as playful as the others… a lot of the times I let myself fade into the background. With my constant personal schedules on top of my obligations with Infinite, sometimes it’s easier for me to just be L. But you two won’t let me! No matter what, everyday you make sure the real me can play. At first I struggled with myself, unsure of whom I really was under the constant stress. The two of you showed me that it’s okay to just be myself, and that having an image doesn’t matter as long as I have true friends. It might surprise you to know that a lot of the things today were my ideas, but I just wanted to show you two how much I really care, since I can never seem do so with my words. With much love, Myungsoo_

 

_Leader Gyu & Namstar-  
Ah, are you surprised? The five of us have worked hard this week to pull off Operation HD! (Can’t tell you what it means, it’s a secret! xD) I’m sorry if any of us had to deceive you this week, but it was all for this purpose. We wanted to be able to give you guys a special night that you deserved! I know that in a lot of areas I am lacking, and that I might be the weakest link in the group sometimes. But know that my heart will never be the weakest! Hopefully I can make up for my faults with my friendship. I will continue to work my hardest, whether it is to perfect our latest dance or to give my best friends the date of their lives. Seeing the two of you together gives me hope; I can only dream that one day I can find my prince charming too. I love you hyungs, don’t ever forget it! Your favorite little brother, Yeollie_

 

_My dearest friends-  
Can you believe that we actually pulled this off? I confess, when we first thought of our ideas, they were ambitious to say the least. But we were willing to work hard to ensure that all of our plans for you worked out for the best. We have always been close with each other, since even before debut. You both have taken good care of me, allowing me to be myself even if I am a little crazy at times. Instead of forcing me to fit into a stereotype, you have allowed this dinosaur to remain wild and free. I hope that through this day you can truly feel how much the two of you mean to the rest of the group. We would do anything for you if it would make you happy. The two of you will be together forever, because you are soul mates. This night will be special for the two of you, but I know that it will just be the beginning. I LOVE YOU!!! Dongwoo :)_

 

 _To my protégé and his chosen one-_  
Don’t think I don’t notice how hard the two of you work for the good of Infinite. As our vocal line, your beautiful voices have helped us to stand out amongst other idols. As our friends, you’ve helped us to handle our fame with grace and humility. Your path to find one another was not an easy one, but doesn’t that just make you cherish the happy times more now? The two of you have a special place in my heart, because I feel like I have seen your relationship grow from day one. Even though I might give the two of you a hard time ~~most of the time~~ occasionally, please know that it comes from a place of love. Please understand that I will always be the biggest fan of Woogyu, even if my teasing says otherwise. Love you as much as you love me! Hoya  
P.s. Try to stop crying. How are you going to be in the mood to fuck if you are covered in tears!? Kekeke

 

I laughed despite myself. Hoya would be so disappointed if he saw me right now, cause I couldn’t stop the tears even if I tried. Not only did I have to the best boyfriend in the world, but I was lucky enough to have the best friends in the world too. When I looked at Sunggyu he had tears in his eyes too.

 

“I love you so much Woohyun. Don’t cry.”

 

“I love you too. It’s just… I can’t believe they did all _this._ I mean the sign, the notes, the scavenger hunt, hell there’s even wine and candles in here. We owe this whole day to them.. I just feel so grateful.”

 

“Yeah. It’s amazing what those boys can accomplish when they put their minds to it. If only they showed the same enthusiasm during practice that they show trying to get you laid.”

 

I whirled around in shock. “What? You knew?!” He laughed cutely.

 

“Of course I knew. They were far too excited about their plan, I overheard them multiple times. I knew they were having fun with it, so I didn’t say anything.” He got closer to me, his hands moving to cup my face to wipe away a few stray tears. “Plus, I can’t say I disagree with their logic. We are in a beautiful city thousands of miles away from home. It is pretty romantic.”

 

He leaned in, finally capturing my lips in a kiss. My arms rose to pull him closer, fitting his body against mine. I went slow at first; pressing and licking against his plump lips. Eventually he opened them for me, letting his tongue slide against mine as the kiss became more intimate.

 

I felt like my heart was beating so loud that he could hear it. Suddenly I felt so nervous, almost jittery. Sunggyu broke away from me, and I felt eyes rake over my body. “You’re nervous baby.”

 

I smiled at the ground. “Yeah.” I didn’t even try to deny it. He pushed me to rest in one of the oversized plush chairs. He disappeared for a moment, then reappeared with a glass of wine for each of us.

 

“This will help you to relax a bit. It’s your favorite kind too.” He told me with a smile. I took the glass from him and allowed myself a taste.

 

I chuckled. “Pink Moscato. It always hits the spot.”

 

“Hopefully I can say the same thing about you later baby.” My eyes flew up to meet his. He was standing while I sat, his arms resting on the arms of the chair as he leaned over to whisper the teasing remark. I downed the rest of my glass, and he did the same.

 

He was sliding over me to rest in my lap. “You need another drink baby?” His fingers were tangling in my hair again, and my body already felt so hot.

 

“The only thing I need is you Sunggyu.” I told him honestly. He started to grind his hips down on mine, the delicious friction between our jeans already affecting my quickly hardening cock. I ran my hands down his back; not stopping into I slipped them into his back pockets. I grabbed him harshly, enjoying the sigh that escaped his lips. I let him control the pace, but every time he moved his hips down I used my hands to make him grind harder against me. I lifted my own hips respond to him, and soon we were shamelessly rubbing against one another on the chair.

 

The sounds spilling out of him were as intoxicating as the wine, and I wanted more of them. I started to make him move faster, forcing his body harder against my own. I ordered him to kiss me, and he easily complied. I was so caught up in the moment that I almost didn’t hear him.

 

“ _Ah,_ we should.. stop Woohyun. Please.” I immediately removed my hands from his jeans, trying to give him space. Had I assumed incorrectly? Maybe we weren’t on the same page of where the night was heading. He was climbing off the chair and I felt scared for a moment.

 

I looked into his eyes, hoping he would feel my sincerity. “I’m sorry baby. I don’t want to pressure you.  If you’re not ready…”

 

“Woohyun.” He reached down to grab my hands, pulling me out of the chair to slowly back us towards the bed. “I just spent the whole day exploring a foreign city with the man I’m in love with. Now I’d like to spend the whole night exploring his beautiful body. I just figured it would probably be a lot easier if we made use of the king sized bed.”

 

His legs hit the edge of the mattress and he let himself fall down, using the momentum to pull me on top of him. He leaned up to give me a quick kiss before letting his head fall back down. His eyes searched mine. “I’m in love with you Woohyun. I want you to make me yours.”

 

I laced our fingers together, bringing my hand up to his mouth; his lips puckered to kiss my ring. A gesture we often did together to wordlessly convey our feelings. “But you’re already mine Sunggyu.”

 

“You’ve already taken my heart. I want you to take my body too. I need you to claim me Woohyun. I want to feel you inside of me, to make our bodies become one.”

 

We smiled at each other, this moment just felt so right. There was no rush, no risk of getting caught. There was no question about our feelings for one another. We weren’t drunk or caught up in lust. We were just two men in love. It was just me and him, and we had all the time in the world.

 

“I don’t know what I did to deserve such an amazing man like you.”

 

“You loved me back Woohyun.”

 

I nodded at his words, leaning down to capture his lips in a kiss. “Then let me show you just how much.”

* * *

A/N: Coming to bed Sunggyu?  
  
^_^  
  



	12. indulgence

 

His lips felt so soft against mine; we moved so slowly as we tasted one another. His fingers were tightened in my hair as I hovered above him. I pushed my tongue into his mouth, trying to feel and _taste_ of much of him as possible. His moans were low and needy; his own tongue exploring my hot cavern. I’m not sure how long we stayed like that; just kissing one another, preparing for what we both knew was coming next.

 

I forced myself to break away, enjoying the sigh of discontent I heard from him as I put some distance between us. I put my finger to his lips to shush him, and his tongue darted out to tease me.My eyes swept up and down his form. His hair was a little disheveled from the mattress and his t-shirt was bunched up, reveling the creamy pale skin of his stomach. His slacks were tight, probably uncomfortably so based on the hardened member I could already see forming. I let my other hand run down his body as his tongue played with my fingers.

 

I balled his shirt up in my fist, pulling him forward to force him to sit up. I moved my other hand to grab the back of his neck, capturing his lips in a kiss again.

 

“Woohyun-ah.” He gasped out my name, already panting and we were just getting started. I hummed in response, my mouth too busy tracing the line of his neck. I tasted the smooth expanse of his skin, but soon ran into his annoying clothing. Something I would need to get rid of immediately. I leaned back to push my hands underneath his shirt, slowly lifting it up until it was finally off his body. I started to go for his pants, but he beat me to it. Sunggyu’s fingers quickly took care of the button on his slacks, before easing down the zipper.

 

“Are you eager, love?” I chuckled at his actions while I pulled the fabric off his long legs, finally able to enjoy the view of Sunggyu’s fully naked body.

 

Sunggyu reached up to grab my shirt, his hands twisting the fabric as he harshly ripped it apart. I was shocked momentarily as I watched the buttons bounce off his hard torso, but decided to shrug off my ruined top to appease him. His hands began to fumble at my belt buckle. “You haven’t seen me eager yet, Hyunnie. Clothes off. _Now._ ”

 

I made a show of getting off the bed, letting my hands fall down to my belt as I slowly unbuckled it. He was biting his lip, his hips subconsciously moving as he watched my little striptease. I bent my head down, purposely shielding my eyes with my long hair. I eased the zipper down slowly, letting out a little groan before pushing my thumbs into the waistband of my pants. I moved my hands to my sides, slightly tugging down the material to expose more of my hips. I peeked up at him, he was turned on his side now watching me with his cock at full attention.

 

I decided to tease him a little more, running my hands up my torso before threading my fingers through my hair, letting my head fall back with a moan. I knew I painted an enticing image, pants riding low on my hips, abs constricting as I panted heavily, my top fully exposed to my lover.

 

“ _Woohyun._ ” He tone was authoritative, and I loved knowing that I could get him this riled up by visualization alone.

 

“What do you want to see?” I asked him, even though I already knew the answer. I loved hearing him talk to me during moments like this. Seeing those pretty lips whisper such dirty thoughts that only I got to hear; it turned me on to know that this part of him belonged to me alone.

 

“Everything.” I was about to grant his wish, but he moved too quickly for me again. He had shifted off the bed to plant himself on his knees in front of me. His eyes bore into mine as he bit into the waistband of my pants before he began to tug them down with his teeth. When he got them down to my ankles, I stepped out of them to kick them out of the way.

 

“ _Finally._ ” He moaned out, before his lips began to kiss my thighs as his hands ran up my bare legs. “I could stare at your beautiful body all day. I could kiss you all over.” He accentuated his point by dropping more kisses along my legs and hips. His hands moved up to give my ass a firm squeeze, then he was turning me around to face away from him. “Bend over.” He instructed me, a strong hand on the small of my back as I followed his orders.

 

The bed was at a nice height, so I was able to lean over comfortably while resting on my elbows. I felt his tongue travel up the length of my spine. His breath felt hot against my ear as his tongue continued its path. “I could taste you all over baby.” I was about to ask Sunggyu what he had in mind, but his actions spoke louder than words. I was gasping, unable to speak under his skillful tongue, and not in the place I expected it.

 

His hands grasped my ass, pulling me apart to expose my entrance. Sinking to his knees, he pushed his tongue against my opening much to my surprise. The feeling was strange, but good; I whimpered at the unfamiliar sensation but I wanted more. He started off slowly, running his tongue softly against me in little licks. Encouraged by my moans, he began to grow bolder.

 

“ _You like that Woohyun? So fucking good.”_ He had broken away just for a moment to speak to me, before he was diving back in again. I felt overwhelmed; the feeling of his tongue against such an intimate place was more satisfying than I could have imagined. This act was something the two of us had never really talked about, and it was making my head spin that Sunggyu was so willing to pleasure me this way. I gripped my hands into the sheets, trying to keep myself anchored in reality but I was slowly slipping away.

 

Sunggyu pulled away again, blowing on my opening to get a reaction from me. I gasped at the feeling, and he chuckled darkly behind me. His finger was lightly running over my entrance, and I didn’t know how much longer I could keep this up. “I asked you a question baby.”

 

I really wanted to answer, but his hands were spreading me wide again and the pressure of his sinful tongue flicking over and over against my hole had me screaming out. I felt his teeth sink into my cheek, and I cried out at the mix of pain and pleasure he was giving me. “ _Answer._ ”

 

“ _Fuck!_ Yes… god Sunggyu… don’t stop…”

 

He hummed, moving back in to give me a long teasing lick. “And it feels…?”

 

I was panting, not even trying to hide how much he was affecting me. “It’s so good. You are so fucking amazing.”

 

His fingertips dug into my flesh and I was breathless all over again. “And you want…?”

 

“ _More.”_ I didn’t care about silly things like pride, I wanted more of him and I wanted it now. If he wanted me to beg for him I would do so. “I want to feel it inside me… _please_.”

 

His hands were moving in soothing circles over my abused flesh, and for a moment I wondered if he wasn’t willing to do it. But soon enough, he was exposing me again so he could taste me. This time instead of just teasing my entrance, his tongue began to push inside of it.

 

_“Sunggyu!”_ I screamed out shamelessly at the new sensations he was giving me. Everything felt so good but it wasn’t enough; I couldn’t stop myself from pushing my own hips back. I wanted to feel even more of him, trying to get him deeper. I could hear his satisfied moans from behind me, and it only turned me on more.

 

Just when I thought it couldn’t get any better, I felt him reach around to stroke my neglected cock. “ _Sunggyu! Fuck!”_ I desperately tried to hold on to the bed, my knees were beginning to get weak. It was all too much; that teasing tongue penetrating me while his skillful hand worked my member.

 

He pulled away just for a second. “So beautiful Woohyun. I want to see you lose control.” He was stroking me faster now, trying to drive me to the edge.

 

“ _So close.”_ I was, it would only be a matter of moments now. I could feel like that familiar coiling building in the pit of my stomach, and I wanted that release so badly. “ _Please.”_

 

He stood up, molding our bodies together as his hand continued to work my cock. He whispered in my ear again. “Come for me.” I obeyed, seeing white as I let the orgasm take over me. I would have collapsed but he was there; holding me up as I lost myself to the pleasure. Sunggyu was whispering sweet nothings in my ear, supporting my weight as I slowly regained my senses.

 

He cleaned me up quickly, and helped me to shift my body fully onto the mattress. He stretched out beside me, laying his head to rest on my chest as he tangle his limbs with mine. I played with his hair, winding my fingers in the soft locks.

 

“Your heart is beating so fast Hyunnie.” I chuckled, using my other hand to lift up his chin to finally meet his eyes again.

 

“It’s because I’m here with you.” He giggled, hiding his face in my chest cutely. “You going to be shy now? It’s cute considering what you just did.” His cheeks got darker, and he bit his bottom lip anxiously.

 

“I always kind of wanted to try it… and the situation just presented itself…” He was refusing to meet my eyes, blushing while trying to explain himself. I rolled us over so Sunggyu would be underneath me now.

 

“Baby, you don’t have to make excuses for giving me one of the best orgasms I’ve ever felt. I love how naughty you are with me. I can’t wait to be inside of you.”

 

“Yeah?” He opened up his legs for me, his soft thighs brushing against my sides as he waited for my next move.

 

“Yeah.” I sealed my statement with a kiss, our lips moving against one another harshly in anticipation of what was coming next. We broke apart to catch our breath; the both of us panting while letting our eyes rake over the smooth planes of flesh.

 

“I’m so lucky to be with someone as beautiful as you Woohyun. You’re body is so sexy, can’t wait to feel all of you.” His hand grasped my quickly hardening length to make his point.

 

“I love you.” I don’t know why I felt the need to say it then, but I did. Maybe it was because he was putting all of his trust in me by submitting his body to me this way. Or perhaps it was because of his flattery; he always made sure to tell me how beautiful he thought I was, how perfect I looked to him. It was hard to believe in the beginning, when all I could trust was the number on the scale. But over time with his constant encouragement, I began to listen when he told me I looked good. Any spot of insecurity I found on my body he would kiss away. It was his way of helping me and I adored him for it.

 

To be here in this moment with him, after all of the drama and the heartache was surreal. He looked flawless sprawled out underneath me, his body begging for my touch. To be able to stare into his eyes and see the affection I felt returned. There were no doubts; we both knew how love we were with one another.

 

I admired the way his eyes widened with lust when I brought my fingers up to his lips. He sucked the digits greedily, moaning as he slicked them up for me.

 

“Spread your legs for me Sunggyu.” I wanted him to be wide open for me, the back of his thighs touching the mattress. My weight was placed on a bent arm near his head, allowing me access to the pale skin of that pretty neck. I licked the smooth skin, feeling the rise and fall of his muscles as he sucked on my fingers. Eventually I took them out to press my lips against his; kissing him harshly to try to distract him from an amount of pain I was unsure of.

 

I reached down to slowly push the first finger in, his body clenching upon my intrusion. He let out a little grunt, but I knew he was okay. I kept talking to him, telling him how good he felt, how I wanted his everything. Soon his hips were pushing back at me and I knew he wanted more.

 

It was more difficult to insert the second finger; this time I could tell Sunggyu’s moan was one of pain. I kept my slow pace, just slowly working my way in and out as I kissed him.

 

“Put in another. I don’t care if it’s uncomfortable; I just want to get to the next part. Please.” I quickly glanced at him, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to hide the truth in his eyes. He looked confident though, and his eyes showed a desire that I couldn’t deny.

 

When I pushed in my third finger, he arched off the bed. He cried out, and I had to look away when his eyes began to tear. “I love you Sunggyu. I love you.” I repeated it over and over, telling him how beautiful he was and how much I wanted him. I was so proud of him; he was taking it so well even though I knew he was in pain. He had never even played with himself in this way, so this was truly the first time his body was being stretched like this. The pressure around my fingers was intense, and I forced them apart to adequately prepare him for my member.

 

His hands worked their way into my hair, pulling my head down so he could whisper to me. “Find it Woohyun. Make me forget the pain.” I knew what he meant, and I desperately wanted to be able to grant his wish. I began to search inside of him, experimenting with the angles to seek out that special spot. I wondered how I would know when I found it; I was curious to know if it would actually feel different to me as well.

 

I began to curl my fingers, using a bit more pressure to try to pleasure him. Sunggyu’s reaction let me know that I had succeeded in finding that bundle of nerves. His nails bit into my scalp, and he let out a loud scream.

 

“ _Woohyun! Yes!”_ These moans were higher pitched than the ones I was used to hearing; I decided that I wanted to hear more of them.

I pushed harder against him, increasing the pressure on his prostate. “There?”

 

“ _Fuck. Yes. Right there baby._ ” Sunggyu was demanding, his hips grinding against my hand as I pleasured him. He was breathless, unable to calm down once I began to target that spot within him.

 

“You want me to fuck you with my fingers until you come hyung?” I started to move my hand faster, trying to drive him closer to his edge.

 

He moaned loudly. “ _Yes… I can’t… please…”_

 

 I knew exactly what he wanted, and I was more than determined to give it to him. I continued to dirty talk him, knowing it would only turn him on more. I told him how tight he felt around my fingers, how I couldn’t wait to feel it around my cock. I told him that I wanted to watch his eyes close shut and his mouth open wide as the waves of an orgasm rocked him. I told him that I wanted to feel his body clench down around me as he hit his climax.

 

And it did. Suddenly he was shouting my name, screaming out his release at the continued abuse of his prostate. I knew that he had experienced an intense climax; our emotions were both heightened tonight. He was shaking underneath me, his body so sensitive in his post-orgasmic state. I knew that this was my moment. He was a little out of it, so he didn’t notice me slip away. I reached into the nightstand, before pulling away with what I needed.

 

The substance felt warm in my hand as I spread it generously across my length. I placed some on my fingers to cover the outside of his entrance. He jumped a little at my touch, but was ultimately too spent to protest. I tossed the bottle away and got situated between his legs again.

 

“I love you Sunggyu.” I stared into his eyes, voicing my love as I positioned myself at his entrance.

 

“I love you Woohyun.” He stared back, a smile crossing his face as he waited for the moment for our world to shift. I felt a tiny ounce of hesitation, nervous that I would hurt him, or worse be unable to please him.

 

He pulled me down for a kiss, just a firm press of his lips on mine to bring me out of my thoughts and back into the moment. “I’m yours.” Words he had spoken to me long ago, but they had never been truer until now.

 

I kissed him again, trying to convey a thousand emotions in a simple gesture. It was hard to think, the finality of this moment and the anticipation of everything making me breathless. In the end, I uttered a single word as I pushed into him. “ _Mine._ ”

 

His eyes shoot open, a scream ripping from his throat as I pushed into his warm body. Despite my cautious preparation, I knew that this part would still hurt him. Inch by inch, I worked my way into him as he groaned at the intrusion. It felt like it took forever, his body was resisting me but eventually my cock was fully sheathed within him.

 

_“I’m sorry. I love you.”_ I whispered this in his ear, along with other sweet things to try to take his mind off the pain. He was handling it so well, breathing harshly as he tried to let himself adjust to my length. I fisted my hands, forcing myself to try to still as still as possible for him. The overwhelming heat around my cock already had me seeing stars, but I was determined to wait for him before I allowed myself to indulge. I felt his hips experimentally move against me, and I groaned at the shift I felt inside him.

 

_“Move.”_ Sunggyu harshly ordered, and I had no choice but to listen. I started with shallow thrusts, letting myself get used to the intoxicating feeling of being a part of him like this.

 

_“So tight baby.”_ I groaned, feeling bold enough to start putting a little force behind my thrusts. I heard a little gasp from Sunggyu, and I felt the smile take over my face. It was a noise I had heard often from him; a noise of pleasure. _“Feels good?”_ I questioned him, wrapping a hand around his thigh to keep him open for me.

 

“Yes… I’m okay… Don’t hold back _.”_

 

“Careful what you wish for. Wrap those sexy legs around me hyung.” He complied, giving me a lustful stare as he followed my instructions. I enjoyed the way his eyelids fluttered with the changed position, my cock reaching even deeper within him now.

 

I let loose, thrusting into that tight heat as quickly as I could manage. Sunggyu’s screams and heady moans were invigorating; urging me to go harder and deeper to satisfy him. The force of my thrusts was strong enough to cause his body to shift on the mattress. I loved that he wasn’t passive in our coupling; he was thrusting upward to meet me just as harshly.

 

I leaned down to kiss him. It was messy; more teeth than tongue as our excitement began to reach new heights. His nails were digging into my shoulders, running down my back as I gave him what he wanted. It was painful; I knew he had broken my skin in his pleasure. I didn’t care though, I hoped it would leave marks; a tangible reminder of our night of passion together. All I could think about was how beautiful he was, how perfect he was for me. Sunggyu was my other half, willing to give just as much as he was to take. Now we were finally one, fulfilling each other in a way neither of us had ever experienced. As I moved in and out of him I was struck with the realization that I was finally complete. I had found that missing piece.

 

I loved him. A simple truth that shined in my eyes whenever I was with Sunggyu. Even in the haze of all of the lust and the pleasure of his body, my attention was on his heart. Because now he was officially my lover, in all senses of the word. Finally after months of teasing and waiting, I was with him in the way I had desired the most. He had given every part of himself to me, and I didn’t intend to let it go.

 

I kissed him again, softer now that these sentimental thoughts had taken over me. I pinned his hips down to the bed, and set a gentle pace. He moaned in protest at first, but I shushed him with a touch of my lips. “Slow down love. I need to feel you. Just let me enjoy being with you like this for a little while.”

 

He looked into my eyes, and he understood. We rocked against each other lazily, just enjoying the feel of being attached so intimately to the person we loved the most. We whispered sweet confessions to one another, and I told him just how special he was to me. We indulged each other this way for a while, until I accidentally brushed up against that spot inside him. The nails were back as he let out a particularly load moan. I knew what it meant, and I wanted to take things to the next level for him. I needed to bring him the most pleasure he had ever felt, to show him how much I loved being with him this way.

 

I pulled out to reach behind me to unhook his legs from around my waist. He let out a growl of disapproval at my absence, trying to guide me back inside of him. “Patience Sunggyu.”

 

“Fuck that.”

 

“I’ll fuck _you._ ” I moved my hand over my cock, teasing it at his entrance as he tried to get me closer.

 

“Promise?” He challenged me with a smirk. I ran my hands over his addictive thighs, pushing them to his torso to place his ankles around my shoulders. His eyes opened wide realizing what I intended to do, and it just made me harder.

 

I pushed into him, groaning at the sensation of his clenching walls around me. I was nearly bending him in half, and I was able to reach even deeper within him. I rolled my hips diligently until I found what I was looking for.

 

_“Oh! Fuck… More baby…”_ Sunggyu was a mess, writhing beneath me as I abused his prostate.

 

“Fuck what?” I teased him, slowing my pace as I consistently hit that spot.

 

“ _God… Fuck me! Fuck me Woohyun, please!”_ He sounded so desperate, his voice high and needy as he begged for my cock. I appeased him, drilling into him with a precision that had him screaming my name. Hearing him beg to be fucked by me was a bigger turn on than I could have imagined. I was determined to give him exactly what he wanted.

 

I was getting close. His words coupled with the heavy breathing was pushing me dangerously near my breaking point. Despite this I had to make him come first; his pleasure was my priority.

 

“I’m going to make you come Sunggyu. You’re going to climax from the feel of my cock deep inside you alone. You’re going to come so hard for me that you won’t be able to breathe.” He was getting louder, his tone increasing as I seduced him with my words and body. “So fucking beautiful. I want to see you come undone as I fuck you into this mattress hyung.”

 

He was there, and with a loud cry of my name he was spilling himself between us. His body was clenching down on my cock, and the feeling was overwhelming as I felt my own orgasm take over me. I groaned out his name and emptied myself within him. I forced myself to stay up, despite the urge to just collapse at the onslaught of sensations.

 

I managed to shift both of us to the side, and I pulled out of him slowly. We were both panting, unable to really speak in the glow of the aftermath. Words weren’t really necessary though. I stared into his eyes and saw the same love I felt returned. He grabbed my hand, lacing our fingers together to connect us again. He brought it to his mouth, kissing my ring to show his affection, to say the things he wasn’t able to.

 

I had never felt more in love.

 

* * *

A/N: fluffy woogyu is the best :)  
  
  
  
  



	13. passion

 

For a while we just stared at one another, silly smiles on our faces as we relieved the moments internally of what had just happened between us. Sunggyu looked beautifully spent, his chest rising and falling as he tried to calm himself back down. I didn’t want to move at all, content to just look at the beautiful man in front of me for an indefinite period of time, but I figured he would probably want to be cleaned up.

 

I moved to pull away from him, and he cutely let out a sound of protest. “ _Baby._ ” His fingers reached for me, but he didn’t seem to have the strength to move his arm. I felt a strange mix of pride and guilt within myself at being able to sate him to this level.

 

“Just for a second Sunggyu. I’ll come back to you.” I told him, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek. He pouted cutely, but made no further objections.

 

After dragging myself to the bathroom to get some stuff to clean us up, I noticed a rather fancy looking bathtub. It looked spacious enough for the two of us to lie comfortably. I decided to fill the tub with water, adding a little bit of mint bath salts because I knew how much Sunggyu loved the scent.

 

Sunggyu noticed the cloth in my hands and smiled sweetly. “Always taking care of me… thank you. And is that running water?” He questioned when I returned to his side. I wiped away the evidence of our lovemaking before giving him another kiss on those soft lips.

 

“I figured you might enjoy a bath. The water might help with your soreness, make tomorrow better for you. I’m sorry that I didn’t really… go easy on you all things considering.” I looked away shyly. I felt a tad bit guilty; I had been caught up in the moment, wrapped up in _him._ I hadn’t held back when I had taken him, despite it being our first time.

 

“ _Hey._ ” His voice was stern. “Don’t you do that. Don’t blame yourself for something unnecessary. Pain is a part of this, there’s nothing you could have done differently. I told you not to hold back with me. You’ve done nothing but please me tonight.”

 

He grabbed my chin to make me face him, forcing my eyes to meet his. “Even now you continue to take care of me, without me having to ask. You are an amazing lover.” His eyes raked over my frame hungrily. “In more ways than one. If I feel any discomfort tomorrow, it will just be a reminder of what happened between us tonight, and it will only make me smile.” I was happy to hear the reassurance from him. He pulled me down to kiss me, and I responded enthusiastically.

 

“The bath is a good idea. Why don’t you grab the wine? It’s in the mini fridge. Help us both relax and unwind.” He suggested and I nodded, liking the direction this was going. I shifted to slide my arms underneath him.

 

“ _Woohyun,_ I’m not a _girl._ I can walk to the bathroom.” Sunggyu protested, trying to push me away. I wasn’t having it, lifting him off the bed bridal style.

 

I cradled him in my arms as I made my way to our destination. “I know you can. But the point is that you don’t have to.”

 

“You spoil me.”

 

“Because you deserve it.” I answered honestly, bending down to test the water’s temperature to make sure he wouldn’t burn. I slowly placed him inside, and he sighed contently as he got comfortable. “I’m going to go grab the things, adjust the temperature however you’d like.” He nodded silently, leaning forward to play with the lever.

 

I found our two wine glasses from the nightstand, and grabbed the wine in the fridge. I noticed a fruit tray inside as well, _gosh these kids really thought of everything._ It was probably one of the maknae line, a play on the infamous fondue restaurant incident. I knew the both of us could probably use the energy, so I decided to bring that along to. I came back with all the treats, and closed the door behind me to keep the heat in the bathroom.

 

 **“** This was a great idea Hyunnie. It feels so nice in here.” Sunggyu said pleased. “Oh, fruit! Looks yummy, it will taste good with the wine too.” I handed him the bottle so he could pour our glasses while I got in the tub.

 

He wasn’t kidding. The effect of the warm water on my muscles was so soothing. Sunggyu had turned on the jets in the tub as well, which only heightened the relaxation I felt. I spread my legs so Sunggyu could get settled between them, leaning backwards so he was firmly resting on my chest. I placed my free arm around his waist, the other supporting my wine glass. We both just relaxed in the tub, Sunggyu feeding me fruit now and then as the wine bottle started to get less and less full.

 

Before long I was tipsy, the two of us giggling together as I playfully kissed his neck. He pulled away though, turning around to move to the opposite side of the tub. Now I was pouting, but he blew me a kiss as stretched out his long legs to rest on top of mine. “I want to see your face. It will make this next part more exciting.”

 

“And what exactly is the next part?” I asked him curiously.

 

“I think we should play the truth game.” Sunggyu said deviously, swirling the wine is his glass as he stared at me.

 

“Sounds interesting. I’ll play along. You go first babe.”

 

He smiled triumphantly. “Alright. So tonight… what was the most surprising part about the sex for you?”

 

 _Ah._ So this is what he wanted. He was so cute, wanting to talk about dirty topics but too nervous to do so without the pretense of a game. I figured our upcoming conversation was about to get extremely enlightening. “Honestly? How long I lasted.” We both laughed. “What! You feel really, _really_ good. Better than anything else I’ve ever experienced so the urge to come was like instantaneous. But I was determined to make you feel that same level of pleasure, so I’m glad I was able to hold out. Same question back to you.”

 

Sunggyu thought a moment. “I think how quickly my body accepted you. I was expecting it to be painful for a really long time, but it wasn’t. Don’t get me wrong it was uncomfortable at first, but just knowing it was you and that you cared and how much you wanted to make me feel good… I think it made it easier.” I nodded in understanding.

 

“My turn again. Where is the craziest place you want to do it?” Sunggyu asked me playfully.

 

“Easy. Elevator at our dorm.” Sunggyu gasped. “Hey this is partly your fault. This all started when I saw you hit the emergency button that one day. The idea of us coming home from a long schedule… me not being able to wait another second to have you… stopping the elevator suddenly to have my way with you… taking you hard and fast with you pushed up against the wall, your legs wrapped around my waist as you hold on to the railing as I fuck you… your screams deafening in the confined space…” I opened my eyes, not realizing they had slipped closed during my little monologue. Sunggyu’s eyes had glazed over.

 

“ _Yes._ I.. um.. see the appeal now… I’ll have to keep that in mind.” I saw one of his hands disappear underneath the water to palm his hardening length. I smirked at the knowledge that I had gotten him worked up. “Same question for me?” I nodded.

 

“Dressing room at a photo shoot.” I raised my eyebrows at this and urged him to go on. “I don’t know. I think it would be hot. Not only would we be fooling around during work but the added thrill of knowing there are tons of people walking around on the other side of the door. Me having to force myself to be quiet while you pound into me, trying not to get caught… And this one is your fault too. After that stupid W magazine shoot when you practically undressed me with your eyes. At the time I thought I was imagining it, but now I think I know better. There were so many good hiding places in that warehouse that could have been taken advantage of. It was all I could think about the rest of the shoot.” His cheeks were red, which was probably a mixture of the wine and the arousal. Regardless, I thought he looked hot as hell. “You ask a question first this time.” He prompted me.

 

I agreed. “Okay. What’s something you want to try sexually that we haven’t done before?” I chuckled internally. Our “truth game” was definitely turning into spill each other’s sexual desires. But this was good, we were learning about one another and I was definitely getting some inspiration for our future together.

 

“I’d like for you to use toys with me.” He admitted shyly.

 

I didn’t expect that from him. “In what context?”

 

“I don’t know… vibrator that you have the remote control to. Making me use it in public, but I can’t let it show. Like how sexy would it be for me to have it in during a meeting, you turning up the levels as I sit in front of the CEO trying to keep a straight face?”

 

Now I was the one reaching for my erection. “Very, _very_ sexy. I might have unleashed a beast within you.” He laughed, reaching to refill his glass again. “Your turn. Give me a dirty confession Hyunnie.”

 

“I’d like to try role playing.”

 

“Like costumes and everything?” He asked interestedly.

 

“Yeah. Like I have this one where I’m your fan boy and you are this sexy, dangerous rocker. I see you up on stage and I can’t resist you. You’ll all aggressive and you know what you want from me, and I’m more than willing to give it to you.”

 

He bit his lip thoughtfully. “You know I might still have that leather jacket from the Be Mine photo shoot...”

 

I had to hold in my squeal. _Fucking score._ That chick had never updated that fanfic, much to my dismay. But who cares if I got to experience the ending in real life. I didn’t notice Sunggyu setting our glasses down and moving closer to me.

 

“I have another fantasy baby.” He whispered to me, his tongue licking my ear.

 

“Tell me hyung.” The next thing I knew he was in my lap, our erections rubbing against each other in the water.

 

“My boyfriend and I have just finished taking a bath. I go to leave the room but he stops me.” I followed his orders, lifting him out of the bathtub to await the next instructions. “He bends me over the bathroom counter, spreading my legs wide for him.” I set him on the ground, running my hands up his back before I pushed him to lean over. I kicked apart his legs, and I couldn’t wait for what was going to come next.

 

“I’m already stretched from our previous lovemaking, so he doesn’t hesitate to push inside me again.” I was about to ask him if he was sure, but he was already nodding his head at me. I aligned my member with his opening, and slowly entered him. He gasped out in pleasure, a long drawn out yes at my intrusion.

 

“He starts out slowly… just rocking back and forth into my tight entrance as he holds onto my hips.” I set a leisurely pace like he wanted, just enjoying the feel of being inside of him again. I decided to interject.

 

“Your boyfriend tells you how much he loves you. How perfect you are for him. How wonderful it feels to be inside you. How he didn’t even realize how much he missed it until he is apart of you again.”

 

“I tell him that I love him too. That I care about him more than I ever thought possible. I tell him how beautiful he is.” Sunggyu gasped out.

 

“But he pales in comparison to you. You are so very beautiful to him. He wants to see your gorgeous face.” I did, as much as I enjoyed this position, I wanted to see his face, to stare into his eyes.

 

“So he turns me over, resting my back on the counter and wrapping my legs around his waist so he can kiss me.” I pulled out momentarily to move him, but instantly attached my lips to his when I got him where I wanted him. I was back inside him, rocking into that tight heat.

 

“My body begins to crave more. I need him to go harder for me.” Sunggyu moaned out. I moved to fully stand up. I placed my hands against those hips again, pulling him harshly onto my cock. His hands gripped the edge of the counter, and he pushed back forcefully to meet my thrusts.

 

I could tell he wanted to come, that he was getting close. I wrapped one of my hands around his cock and he screamed out in pleasure. I pumped his length in time with my thrusts, and I picked up my pace. Sunggyu wasn’t able to talk much now, lost in the haze of his pleasure.

 

“He can tell that his lover is getting close. He wants to make him come so hard that his body arches off the counter in pleasure.” Only a couple more seconds, and I would get to watch him come undone. I snapped my hips faster, determined to push him over the edge.

 

“ _Woohyun!”_ He called out, spilling his seed as his body was rocked by his orgasm. I stilled my hips, knowing his body would be oversensitive. I quickly wiped him off, while he caught his breath. His head was turned to the side, one hand over his mouth as he tried to regain control.

 

I moved the hand out of the way, turning his head to look at me again. I leaned down to kiss him, and he responded lightly; his body still a little out of it. I moved my mouth to his ear.

 

“He tells you that there is nothing more beautiful than your face when you are overtaken by pleasure, when you are climaxing with his name on your lips.” My cock twitched inside of him, and he let out a grunt at the feeling. “He takes you back to the bed, because he is nowhere near done with you. He won’t be satisfied until he sees that look on your face again.”

 

Sunggyu responded by wrapping his legs around my waist again. He had lost control of them during his climax. Even now, I could feel that they were a little shaky. He wrapped his arms around my neck and whispered back. “I tell my lover that I can’t wait.”

 

I lifted him off the counter, pulling his chest flush against my own. Sunggyu moaned as I was determined to keep us connected together while I relocated us. I moved slowly, and he tightened his hold on my body. Finally I was laying us down on the bed, moving his arms so I could hold his hands. I moved them above his head, keeping our fingers firmly locked together as I flicked my hips. He just felt so good; I couldn’t get enough of him.

 

I felt like I could never get tired of this, of being so close to him. I felt like his body was made for me, that I fit inside of him flawlessly. He was everything I wanted in a lover. He was able to follow my lead, but was just as comfortable taking the reigns. He constantly wowed me, finding new ways to surprise me… to make me crave him even more.

 

Now that I had experienced him like this, I couldn’t imagine not being able to. I stared at his body, letting my eyes take in all the beauty that was Kim Sunggyu as I made love to him.

 

Sunggyu squeezed my hands as he started to speak again. “I tell my lover that he makes me feel beautiful. I tell him that giving him my virginity was one of the best things I have ever done. How proud I am that I was… that I was able…. to give myself to the man I love.” He was getting choked up; it was hard for the words to leave him. I met his eyes and I could see the tears falling, and I immediately got alarmed.

 

“Sunggyu! What’s wrong?” I moved to pull out of him but he gripped my hands harder in warning.

 

“ _Don’t!_ Don’t stop… Don’t you understand? Nothing is wrong Woohyun. _Nothing_. Everything is perfect.” Sunggyu’s eyes bore into mine. So I kept moving my hips, rocking inside him as I pondered his words.

 

And suddenly I understood, because it had been _hard_ for us. The path we had to take to find one another was not an easy one. There had been miscommunications, hurt and heartache that had lasted for far too long. We had to fight to find the strength to make it work. We had to fight to get to this point in our relationship. _And we would never stop fighting for one another._ There would be new challenges; new problems but as long as we had each other, as long as we had _this,_ nothing else mattered.

 

He was my other half. He was made for me. He was perfect. We had decided to wait to be with each other in this way, and this was why. Because we could honestly look each other in the eyes and know that there would never be anyone else. As I was buried deep inside of him, connected so intimately to him I knew in my heart that I could never be with another person this way. _We were perfect. There is nothing better than this._

I felt the tears build up in my eyes. _I understand._ He nodded beneath me, his eyes shining with happy tears. I kissed him, long and hard to show him that I felt it too. That I understood what was happening between us. This was the biggest moment of our relationship, hell the most important moment of our lives.

 

This was bigger than losing our virginities to one another. This was more than just confessing that we were in love. More concrete than deciding that the love we felt was shared and returned. More significant than our decision to be committed to each other.

 

This was the moment that we realized that we had found what most people only dream of, that our hearts would never have to search again. We both understood that we had found the person that we wanted to spend the rest of our lives with; that we were going to grow old together, that the other was never going to leave.

 

_This was the moment when the both of us realized that we would never be alone again._

 

Our senses were heightened as we moved against each other, our tongues dancing together as we kissed passionately. He clutched my body more tightly, I moved inside of him more urgently. I was so helplessly in love, and that would never change. Sunggyu had stolen my heart, and I never was going to get it back.

 

“You’re my soul mate Sunggyu.” I told him, high off the feeling of his beautiful body clenching around my length.

 

It wasn’t long before I came inside of him, losing myself to the overwhelming sensation of just being with _him._ Being with my one true love. He cried out as he lost control once again that night, his climax overtaking him stronger than ever before. He truly was mine, always and forever.

 

This was the man who would change my life; the person who would be there by my side every step of the way, through the good times and the bad. And I couldn’t be happier. I held him tightly, wrapping my arms around his shaking frame as we came back down together. I moved him to a comfortable position, knowing his body needed the rest. I kissed him sweetly as I wished for him to have good dreams.

 

The raw emotion the both of us felt in that moment was indescribable. This night was the beginning of the rest of our lives. _Everything is perfect._

 

This night… this entire _day_ had been everything we could have dreamed it would be. The experience had opened my eyes to one resounding truth. Something I could have never realized before the moments of passion I had felt with him today.

 

_Kim Sunggyu was the love of my life._

 

I couldn't stop the smile that spread across my face. I was the luckiest guy in the world.  
  


* * *

A/N: woohyun realizing he is the luckiest guy in the world.  



	14. prying

 

I was annoyed with myself; I was ridiculously tired and yet I couldn’t fall asleep. The members and I had spent pretty much the whole day shadowing Sunggyu and Woohyun, making sure that everything was going to plan and asking people to deliver the next clues so we could stay incognito. We had split into two teams to cover more ground throughout the day, and I was paired with Sungyeol.

 

I had an amazing time today, and not just because all of my ideas were working out. Sungyeol and I had just as much fun exploring Los Angeles together. I’m not sure I can remember a time where Sungyeol smiled as much as he did today. He was a ball of energy, bouncing around and pointing at all the interesting new things around us. He was absolutely beautiful, and I had to force myself to focus on our task multiple times instead of getting lost in the enigma that was Lee Sungyeol.

 

The five of us planners had meet in the hotel lobby to have a celebratory drink after watching Sunggyu and Woohyun board the elevator. We were sharing stories, just having a good time together after a long day of work and play. Sungjong was still complaining that he didn’t get to go to Disneyland, but I couldn’t bring myself to sympathize with him. Not after seeing the way Sungyeol’s face had been transformed in pure joy and amazement at the fireworks display. His eyes were transfixed on the sky bursting with pretty colors; he had called it breathtaking. I agreed with him, but my eyes weren’t looking at the fireworks; they were focused only on him.

 

Now we were in bed together, and the logical thing for me to do would be to get some much needed rest before heading to Las Vegas to continue our schedules. But here I was, staring at the ceiling and sneaking peeks at the boy next to me. He was right next to me, and yet he felt out of reach. I longed to pull him close, to wrap myself up in his heat. But Sungyeol wasn’t one for skinship; he barely tolerated my koala hugs during the daylight. I could only imagine his response if I tried to cuddle up with him in bed. I shifted my body again, trying to make myself comfortable but I knew it would be futile. The past few nights here had all been like this; it had been awhile since I had been forced to share a bed with ~~my crush~~ Sungyeol, and my mind was too full of thoughts of a gummy smile and long legs to calm my rapidly beating heart.

 

“You need to rest Myungie.” I jumped at his sudden words, and he rolled over to face me. He smiled at me and rubbed his eyes sleepily, and oh my god that had to be one of the cutest images I had ever seen. It wasn’t fair for him to be able to affect me this way, to make my breath catch with a simple grin.

 

I couldn’t bear to look at him anymore, so I tried to bury my face in the pillow and mumble out an apology. He reached out to grab my chin, forcing me to face him again. He brushed my bangs out of my eyes and gave me a soft smile. “Talk to me, not your pillow.”

 

“I said I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up with my tossing and turning. I know it’s annoying and you’re tired, I can sleep on the floor so I don’t bother you if you want-”

 

“Don’t be silly Myungie, you’ll stay right here. Talk to me, you’re my best friend. If something is bothering you so badly that you can’t sleep, then tell me about it.”

 

“It’s nothing, I swear-” Sungyeol suddenly leered at me in such a way that caught me off guard. “…why are you looking at me like that?”

 

“You’re thinking about Sunggyu and Woohyun aren’t you?”

 

This was kind of true. But I couldn’t say that I was thinking of them because I was wishing it was _us._ “Um, yeah. I was I guess.”

 

Sungyeol burst into laughter, and playfully hit me on the chest. “You perv! I can’t believe you are thinking about them doing it so hard that you can’t sleep. Dare I look under the covers?”

 

I frantically gripped the covers and covered my crotch area before he got any wild ideas. Not that I had a hard on or anything, but I might have been saying hello since Sungyeol was laying in a bed next to me in only his boxers (his hot body temperature at night was both a blessing and a curse). “It’s not that! I swear!”

 

Sungyeol just kept chuckling at my embarrassment. His hand raised up to caress my cheek. “You’re cute when you blush. And it’s okay Myungie. To think about it. Honestly… I’ve been thinking about it too.”

 

Now it was my turn to be surprised. “You have?” I wasn’t sure exactly what he meant.

 

“Yeah. About losing my virginity.” Oh. _Oh._ This wasn’t at all where I thought this conversation would go, but I desperately wanted him to continue. Even though Sungyeol was the person I was closest to in this group, we didn’t often have serious conversations like this. “It’s funny actually. I think if you had asked me about it before this trip, I would have told you that I just wanted to get it out of the way. To be done with it, to just do it with someone so I could officially be a grown up, you know? But now… I don’t know. The way Woohyun looks at Sunggyu… he looks at him like there couldn’t be anything more important in this world. The fact that they waited, it just made it that much more special didn’t it? I guess I’ve always thought that losing your virginity was an awkward experience. After today I know that I’m wrong. It can be beautiful, full of love.”

 

He looked away, suddenly seeming sheepish. “I can’t help but wonder if one day somebody will love me like that. If someone will care enough to wait for me, to try to make it special. I used to think that we didn’t have time for romance because of Infinite. But now I know that there is always room in life for love, you just have to make it happen.”

 

The silence passed between us, long and heavy as I tried to get a handle of my emotions. Sungyeol had just revealed so much of himself to me, and the fact that he trusted me enough to share such personal thoughts… it warmed my heart.

 

Sungyeol’s pretty fingers drew absentmindedly on the sheets between us. “I wonder when I’ll meet my prince charming.” It felt like he stole the breath right of my lungs.

 

I forced a smile onto my face, but I wouldn’t have been surprised if it came out as a grimace. “I hope that it’s soon, you deserve it Sungyeol.” He did, he really did. Even if I couldn’t be the one to give it to him, all I wanted was for him to be happy. I turned away from him then, facing the wall with a heavy heart. I didn’t want him to see my tears. But if I hadn’t turned away I would’ve seen the disappointment on his face. I would have seen the way his hand reached for me wistfully, but only grasped air.

 

_I was right next to him, and yet I was out of reach._

 

* * *

 

I currently had him pinned to the wall, enjoying the strange mix of a moan and giggle that was so entirely _Dongwoo_ that it just made me harder. We had just barely stumbled into our room, a little tipsy and giddy after a few too many rounds at the hotel bar. I choose not to waste any time, immediately pressing him into the closest hard surface to have my way with him as soon as the door clicked shut. Unfortunately for his back, this so happened to be the wall.

 

“You are-“ A tongue in his ear, a sharp gasp of breath, “ _ah,_ insatiable. _Ridiculous_. Gosh the bed is right there, it would take only seconds-”

 

I choose not to let him finish, pressing my lips to his deliciously full ones. It amazed me how after all of our time together, the feel of his lips against my own still managed to be just as dizzying as it was in the beginning. My teeth caught his lip, biting it as he panted out at the slight pain. But that was the way Dongwoo liked his pleasure; nights filled with passion that was rough around the edges.

 

“God Hoya, your fucking _teeth…_ ” Dongwoo arched his neck back, pushing my head down his front for me to run my canines over his exposed skin. It’s fulfilling and yet aggravating at the same time; I know I can’t really mark and bite him the way that I want. Not the week when we are shooting a music video, a photo book, and a behind the scenes DVD. It makes my head spend to think of all of our obligations, and how much of ourselves we have to give to the company, to the fans.

 

This is why I’m greedy with Dongwoo, why I kiss and take and claim him because he is one of the few things that I can really call _mine_ in this world. While some ~~Woohyun~~ might think my penchant for screwing Dongwoo into the nearest flat surface has to do with my lack of self control, it has more to do with my desperation; sometimes the only thing that can anchor me in this crazy world is the feel of Dongwoo’s lips and the look in his eyes when I make him come. It calms me, it makes me feel safe; like I’ve found my way home again no matter where we are in the world.

 

“Harder Hoya, I wanna feel you.” Dongwoo calls out to me, and my fingers grasp the wall in frustration.

 

“I can’t baby. I want to but I can’t.” The teasing uniforms that I have been praising all week for showcasing his beautiful body are now my worst enemy; they show too much skin that would cause too many questions if covered in love bites.

 

“You _can._ You just have to find a place that they won’t be able to see.” Dongwoo grabs my hand off of the wall, and guides it to his inner thigh. I look up at him, and he nods to encourage me. I force him out of his shirt quickly, before dropping down to my knees. The belt is next, expertly undone with one hand as my other explores the soft skin of his back. I move my thumbs to his sides, hooking them in the pants to tug them down his muscular legs.

 

I look up at him with a grin. “No underwear?” I love that he still has it in him to blush, despite knowing exactly what we are about to do. “Don’t tease Hoya.” He steps out of his clothing and he is finally naked in front of me. I run my hands up his legs, from hard calves to his soft thighs and he shivers underneath my touch. Normally I would tease him more, try to make him beg for it but I have been longing for him all day, so focused on the plan with my silly hyungs to give the beautiful man in front of me the attention he deserved.

 

I kiss the hard muscles of his stomach, licking his belly button just to make him squirm and to hear that adorable giggle again. He chastises me but I’m already moving on to explore more of his skin. My mouth finds that groove where his thigh meets his hip, tracing it fully with my tongue.

 

“Please baby _.”_ The marks are Dongwoo’s way of staying grounded; they remind him that what we have is real, even though we have to hide our love around so many people. I want to be able to give him that reassurance, so I move my mouth to his thigh.

 

I encourage him to rest his leg on my shoulder, so I can have full access to his smooth, unblemished skin. I smile, knowing it won’t be that way for long. Dongwoo threads his fingers in my hair; it’s shaved on the sides again for this concept, but there is more than enough length on the top for him to hold onto, his one request before I went to the salon.

 

“Touch yourself.” I don’t have to ask him twice, the pretty fingers wrapping around his cock as I abuse his thighs. I drag my teeth across the skin roughly, and Dongwoo cries out at the slight discomfort. He urges me to bite harder, so I sink my teeth into his soft skin the loud groan a sure sign that I have given him what he wanted.

 

“ _Fuck._ Damn it Hoya, it’s too soon for me to be this flustered.” I chuckle against his skin, I enjoy getting him so riled up. I shift his leg down, before repeating the same actions with the other. Soon enough his pretty pale skin is marred with multiple marks, some created by my teeth and some by my tongue, but all of them look beautiful. Dongwoo’s legs are already shaking, the hand on his cock never stopping its rhythm.

 

“You’ve been driving me crazy all damn day.” It’s true; I haven’t been able to take my eyes off him. He’s been so wonderfully _happy_ today, all silly grins and blushing giggles as we carried out our plan. And while other things make Dongwoo attractive in my eyes, there is nothing that makes him shine brighter than his smile. It hasn’t left his face today, if anything it’s just gotten bigger as the day went on. He’s been so touchy feely, giving me heated looks and whispering _I’m so happy that I am in love with you_ and _I can’t wait until we are alone._

 

Now we are alone, and the beautiful strawberry blonde is naked in front of me to deal with as I choose. I move his hand off of his cock, and I see the cute pout but hear no sounds of protest. “Hold on.” I whisper, and his fingers tangle in my hair again. I pull him forward, bringing his legs over my shoulders again.

 

“Hoya, what… _Oh!_ ” By the time he has lost track of his sentence, I am already standing, his body pushed all the way up the wall. The fingers tighten in my hair, it’s cute that he’s nervous but I have a firm grip on him. My hands find purchase on his ass, creating a makeshift seat for him.

 

“Put your cock in my mouth baby.” Dongwoo’s head hits the wall with an audible bang.

 

“Fuck Hoya, do you know what you are doing to me?” I choose to answer by wrapping my mouth around his length. He lets out a delicious moan at the contact, and I feel the smirk spread across my lips. With the position I can’t necessarily move my head that much, so I focus on sucking and using my tongue. Dongwoo doesn’t seem to have any problems with it, a string of curses falling out of his mouth, as the tugs on my hair get harder. I wish that I could see his face, I can imagine the way he looks; eyes closed tight in pleasure, his panting mouth wide open, an occasional bite on that sexy lower lip when my tongue swirls over the head of his cock. His soft thighs are brushing across my cheek as he loses control of his legs, writhing high up in the air against the wall as I work his cock.

 

“Damn you Hoya. I had plans… I was gonna – _Oh fuck just like that_ \- … I was gonna, shit I can’t even think.” I chuckle around his length, and apparently the vibrations are too much for Dongwoo. He wrenches my head off of his cock, and I get to see those wild eyes staring at me again. “This is nice baby, it really is but I need to be able to touch you. _Please._ ”

 

I decide to grant his wish, pulling away from the wall to hold all of him. I don’t even break a sweat, I’m used to carrying his weight; hell I trained in the gym purely so that I could do things just like this. So I could throw his body around and bend it to my wills. My knees hit the bed and I slowly lower him down to the sheets. The moment his back is firmly on the mattress he’s pulling down to him, catching my lips in a desperate kiss.

 

He grabs me by my neck to break the kiss, and fuck if that doesn’t turn me on. “Take your clothes off.” I intend to do so, but right now I’d rather indulge in those luscious lips. I move back in to try to kiss him and he tightens his hold on my neck roughly. I choke slightly but his gaze doesn’t waver. “I said to take your fucking clothes off. Make me repeat it again and you’ll be sorry.”

 

This is… quite unexpected. We hold eye contact but he doesn’t even blink, the challenge in his eyes bright and clear. He did mention having some sort of plan, was this it? I decided to humor him, if Dongwoo wanted to give dominating a try than I would willingly plan along. I held his gaze, slowly shedding my clothes in such a way that I knew he would appreciate. I could see the way his eyes widened as more of my skin was revealed, but he refused to look away first. I stepped out of the last piece of fabric and made my way closer to him again. “What next?”

 

He got up from the bed and touched my chest briefly, before lightly pushing me back. He kept a fingertip on my skin as he slowly started to circle me. He dragged his eyes up and down my body, openly checking me out while licking his lips. For the first time I felt like I was the prey, and he was the hunter. It was ridiculously arousing, and I clenched my fists as I willed myself to stay still for his appraisal. He moved up close to me from behind, his breath ghosting over my skin but not touching me. “Get on the bed.”

 

I obey, making myself comfortable on top of the sheets and resting my head against the pillow. Dongwoo crawls up the bed, his eyes twinkling as he finally comes to a stop over my body. I want nothing more then to touch him, to pull him close but I have a feeling that Dongwoo wouldn’t allow it. He touches me though, running his palms over the muscles of my abdomen. “Such a sexy body.” He whispers while lightly pinching my nipples before taking away his hands again.

 

“Can I touch you?” I figure it’s useless to ask but still worth a try.

 

He smirks at me and shakes his head. “Not yet.” It’s not the answer I want, but it holds the promise that I will be able to soon. He is up on his knees straddled over my waist, a superior look on his face that I am not used to but am intrigued by nevertheless. “Close your eyes.” I don’t want to, I want to keep looking at him so I close them begrudgingly. I feel him shifting around on the bed, and the heat of the moment is starting to warm up the room.

 

“I think I’m going to have my way with you.” His mouth is right next to my ear as he utters the words, his lips trailing across my face before pressing to my lips. The moment I feel them I push his mouth open, forcing in my tongue as I try to taste as much of him as possible.

 

The hand is back on my neck again as he breaks our lips apart. “Did I give you permission to taste me?” I shake my head, forcing my eyes to stay shut. “Control yourself Hoya. Remember that tonight you are mine. You are here for _my_ pleasure.”

 

I nod, I can feel his body heat but not his body itself; it is infuriating. I decide to start playing the game. “Yes… use my body Dongwoo. For whatever you want.” I feel him moving around again and I am more than relieved when he finally orders me to open my eyes.

 

I don’t fight the loud moan that escapes my mouth when I see him for the first time. He’s wearing it, the fucking commander hat _and nothing else,_ and I feel my balls tighten in anticipation. “Jang _fucking_ Dongwoo.” I tighten my fists and roll my body in desperation. I want to just take him, fuck that beautiful body so hard until the hat falls off and he’s screaming my name. God damn, I don’t even know when he had time to steal it, he acted like he didn’t even want to. But now he is right on top of me, ordering me around and making demands and fuck I am conflicted. My hands rise up to touch him, they hover over his body but I force them back down, clenching the sheets.

 

He knows that this is my answer, and he licks his lips. “Are you going to be good Hoya?”

 

“Yes… please.” I’m not even sure what I’m asking for, but all I know is that I need something now because I am not exactly known for my patience. He places a firm hand on my chest, his fingers spreading out prettily against my skin. His hypnotizing eyes find my own again, and now he’s sucking fingers in his mouth. I groan, I know what’s coming next but we usually don’t do this. I usually prepare him because it’s quicker, more efficient but tonight he seems to be in a mood to put on a show. The only part of Dongwoo’s body that is touching me is his hand, and that’s just to support himself; it has nothing to do with my benefit.

 

He leans forward, his long hair falling into his eyes as his other hand reaches back. “One.” He says as he slowly works himself open. I’m fucking entranced, my eyes flicking all over the smooth expanse of his pale skin. “Two.” He bites his lip a little, his breath starting to speed up a bit. I grip the sheets harder; I want nothing more than to take over. I hear a broken moan, and I almost lose it. “Ah… _three._ ”

 

“ _Dongwoo._ ” I call out to him, but he looks away ignoring me. The moans keep spilling out of his mouth, and I can tell that he is quickening his pace. He looks up at me through his bangs with that half lidded stare that makes me feel lightheaded. He’s been at this for awhile now, stretching himself while he teases me to the brink of my self control. His fingers grip my chest harshly, his nails biting into skin. I take this as a sign that he’s ready for the next step, but instead he leans down to give me a kiss. It’s quick, just a firm press of his lips before he pulls away to whisper across my lips. “ _Four._ ”

 

I start begging. “ _Fuck,_ Dongwoo I need to be inside of you. Please baby, let me fuck you I promise I’ll make it so good. I can’t _take_ this anymore. _Dongwoo._ ” He laughs, it’s somewhat deeper and he’s still working those fingers in and out of his opening.

 

“You think your cock will be better than my fingers?” He asks me like he doesn’t know the answer and I fucking growl at him in response. “How about we try it and see, hmm?” I’m about to tell him how much I like that idea but he is already slowly sinking onto my length. He’s still so fucking tight and I can feel his body stretching to accept me and _holy fuck I am still so frustratingly far away from his body_.

 

I’m fully sheathed inside of him now, and Dongwoo is leaning forward to rest both of his hands on my chest. “I think… you were right.” He moans out and my body tenses and I’m about to show him just how fucking right I am but his nails dig into my chest again. “ _I’m in control.”_  He reminds me and I want to shout in frustration at this ridiculous mix of gratification and denial.

 

He gives himself a little time to adjust but soon enough he is rolling his hips. “You like this.” He whispers, body already starting to fall into a rhythm. “You like it when I use your cock for _my_ pleasure.”

 

And fuck, I do but I don’t but I really _do._ This goes against my nature, I am always the one calling the shots and setting the terms. I’m the one who makes Dongwoo a mess, who drives him crazy. This is new, this is frustrating, and yet it feels mind-blowingly good. I think if it were anyone else it wouldn’t; I would be turned off by the push and pull, the annoying fleeting touches. But it’s _Dongwoo_ , and he’s riding me like he’s got something to prove and maybe he does. It isn’t like him to be the instigator, to be the one who pushes the envelope. But he is trying and he’s doing it all just to please _me_ and fuck if that doesn’t make me harder.

 

He’s bouncing now, picking up his speed as he moves on my cock. His hair is all over the place, his head thrown back in abandon as he seeks out his pleasure. The sounds falling out of him are high and needy; I just want to be able to take him to that next level. It’s getting harder and harder to just lie here and take it, despite how entertaining it is to watch him in his element.

 

He’s rolling his body, swiveling his hips and looking down at me like he’s a fucking porn star. Dongwoo’s movements are always so _fluid_ ; it’s what makes him such a good dancer, he moves in time with the music with a grace that others envy. The dance he does in bed is even hotter, the intimate touches and rocking of his hips moving to an almost primal rhythm. He’s so absolutely beautiful searching for his release, I find myself wanting to help him reach his climax simply just to make him happy.

 

“Let me help you.” Dongwoo turns his attention to me but never stops his hips from moving. He looks skeptical. “I just want to make you feel good. The only thing I’ll do is touch your cock.”

 

He long eyelashes flutter as he considers it. “What’s in it for you?” He purposely clenching his insides around me and I gasp at the pressure.

 

“Nothing.” I whisper, and he quirks an eyebrow. “I just want to do for you.” He leans down then, pressing his soft lips to kiss me and I ache to deepen it. He pushes at my lips with his tongue, and I gladly open up for him as we get caught up in the kiss.

 

He breaks away for just a second, “I’m waiting…” before diving back into the kiss. This is the most contact I’ve had with him since we got to the bed, and _god_ it feels so good to be able to kiss him like this and feel the weight of his cock in my hand. I want to make him come, I want to make him come _right now_ so we can end this silly little game. I want to be able to hold him and touch him without having to ask permission. He is mine and I’ll be damned if he ever forgets it after this night is over.

 

I keep a firm grip on him, moving my hand in time with his hips to match his rhythm. He pants into my mouth at the added stimulation, and I can tell that he is getting close. He leans back a little to try to catch his breath, and I catch onto his bottom lip with my teeth. I don’t let go, looking up at him and baring my teeth in a clear challenge. He loses it then, hands moving to clutch my face as he screams out my name. I finally raise my arms to hold him, wrapping my arms around his back to pull his body flush to my own. I stroke his lower back softly as he comes down from his high, and eventually he turns to me to give me the softest kiss I’ve felt all night.

 

He giggles and I’m still rock hard inside of him. He kisses my neck lightly and shifts up a bit to look in my eyes. “I wasn’t too rough? Was it okay?”

 

I roll my eyes at him, he’s entirely too precious for me to ever think he was truly trying to hurt me. “It was perfect, you did a good job.” Dongwoo blushes, trying to turn away from me but I nudge his chin back to look at me. “I’m serious, you are very, very sexy.” I move the hands on his back to reach down and grasp his ass. “And while that was fun, I’m going to have to remind you now why I am the one in control.” I grip his hips and finally allow myself to buck upwards into his warm heat. “I’m just going to apologize in advance. You pushed me too far, denying me your body like that. Now I’m not going to be able to hold back. I’m going to fuck you so hard that you’ll beg me for mercy.”

 

Dongwoo laughs again before catching my lips in a kiss. “That was my plan all along babe.” He leans back and tips his hat to me.

 

“I’m going to fuck that hat right off of you.”

 

He smiles, and drops his eyes submissively. “Whatever I can do to please you… _Master_.” He winks at me and I begin my attack.

 

* * *

 

The morning comes way too soon. I’m tangled in the sheets with Sunggyu, his chest rising and falling calmly in his slumber. I’m not sure why I woke up first, but I am glad I did so I can watch him this way. In his sleep he looks younger, less burdened with the stress that comes from with our lives. My eyes move to the clock on the bedside table; we don’t have much time before we will be needed downstairs. Sunggyu is a heavy sleeper, so he doesn’t wake up when I force myself out of bed. I gave him a soft kiss on the cheek before starting my morning routine.

 

He wakes up when I’m finishing my shower. I hear him shifting in the bed and calling my name. The fact that the first thing he does is search for me after waking up warms my heart. “Woohyunnie?”

 

I walk out to find his hair a mess, his eyes barely open and clearly confused. It’s so utterly adorable that I immediately jump on him. “Ya! You’re all wet!”

 

“But you’re so cute I couldn’t help it.” He nudges me off him and then sits up with a bolt after looking at the clock.

 

“Aish! I gotta wake up the kids, you should’ve woken me up pabo.”

 

“Calling me names before you’ve even given me a good morning kiss? Is this the way you treat your amazing boyfriend after he’s given you a night of mindblowing sex?” He laughs at me, but beckons me forward with his finger. We share a sweet kiss before he moves out of bed, admittedly slowly.

 

I give him a worried look and he swats me playfully on the head. “I’m _fine._ All of the schedules we have left don’t require any dancing, so I promise I’m okay. I told you last night that you gave me what I wanted.”

 

I pout and wrap my arms around him. “I know baby, I just worry about you.” He rolls his eyes, but still leans down to drop a kiss on my forehead. “And you don’t have to worry about the kids. I already gave them their wake up calls before I got in the shower. We’re supposed to be leaving in less than an hour; I’ll pack up our room and grab us some breakfast while you shower.”

 

Sunggyu nodded after hearing the plan. “I’m surprised that you aren’t trying to join me.”

 

I pull him in to give him a kiss, a real one this time, coaxing his mouth open as I feel him melt into it. By the time we break apart his cheeks are a dusty pink. “I would like nothing more, but less than an hour is not enough time to do all of the dirty things I would love to do to you.” I gave him a playful smack on the ass and he yelps. “Now get going, we’ve got a long day ahead of us!” He tries to send me a death glare but it really isn’t that effective with the bedhead.

 

Before long we are on the charter bus, making our way to Las Vegas. The drive is a little over four hours long, and we all use it to catch up on some much needed sleep. Before drifting off I could see the questions in the members’ eyes, but we told them we’d talk with them once we got someplace more private.

 

We’ve barely dropped our bags on the floor in our new hotel room before we hear a banging on the door. "Open up hyungs!” I recognize the sweet voice of Sungjong followed the sassy Hoya. “And make sure you are fully clothed, we still got innocent eyes out here!”

 

I rip open the door with a glare. “We know how to control ourselves unlike _other_ people.”

 

“Good, because they don’t.” Hoya just gives me his trademark smirk before pushing his way in. He immediately tackles me to the ground, ruffling my hair and dropping sarcastic quips. Dongwoo pulls him off of me to give me his own embrace, almost in tears. I look over to see that Sung brothers have created a sandwich of sorts, all long limbs and excited yelling as they pester Sunggyu. Myungsoo kind of hangs towards the back smiling, but the light doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

 

Everyone makes the rounds of giving us hugs and well wishes. The room becomes ridiculously noisy with all the catcalls and teasing questions. Sunggyu looks as red as a tomato when Sungyeol point blank asks him if I was a good lover.

 

“Ya choding! Why do you want to know that!” I demand.

 

Sungyeol looks sheepish. “I was just curious if it was worth the wait! And don’t look so scandalized, hyungs have inspired me to protect my own chastity with their beautiful love story.” Sunggyu actually looks surprised before pulling a shy Sungyeol into a hug and telling him that it’s a good decision. Myungsoo looks up at Sungyeol's words, but he turns away after seeing the skinship between them.

 

Hoya is posted up against the wall with a judging look. “What is wrong with the people in this group, it’s like you have no sex drive.”

 

“Play nice Hoya or history might have to repeat itself.” Everyone turns to Dongwoo who has a light blush on his cheeks, and Hoya just rolls his eyes.

 

“Yeah hyung, quit trying to corrupt us pure souls.” Sungjong says overly pleasant, before leaning over to give me a quick high five. Trolling Hoya has brought me much closer to the maknae lately.

 

Sunggyu coughs to get everyone’s attention. “Well I think I speak for both of us when I say thank you. We really appreciate the time and effort you put into trying to make us happy. I don’t think we could ask for a more supportive group of members, let alone best friends. The whole day yesterday was perfect.”

 

“And the night?” Sungyeol asks while wriggling his eyebrows. I pop him on the head and he pouts, which even I admit is adorably cute. He is my aegyo protégé after all.

 

“I want to know too hyung!” Sungjong claims excitedly, and Sunggyu is back to blushing.

 

“No details for you kids. Wouldn’t want to corrupt those pure, innocent souls of yours.” Hoya snaps back, and the maknae line pouts at getting their own words used against them. “Now, as much as I’d love to stay and chat, Woohyun and I have many _intimate_ details to discuss concerning last night.” He leers at the maknaes and they give him upset looks in return. All except for one that is.

 

Myungsoo has been really quiet, which admittedly was kind of characteristic for him, but he wrote in his note that he had a huge hand in planning me and Sunggyu’s date. I would have thought that he would have asked more questions or shown more interest at the fact that it worked out. But instead his gaze was focused on the floor the whole time, his fingers absentmindedly picking at his clothes.

 

“You and Woohyun can have your little chat. I’m sure me and Dongwoo have a lot of things to discuss as well.” Sunggyu said smugly, and I wasn’t sure I liked where that was going.

 

“Ha! You two better watch out, we all know that Leader hyung and Dino hyung really control everything anyway. They are totally going to plot against you for being so mean to us.” Sungyeol said happily, after giving Hoya and I a bit of merong.

 

“We are just going to go innocently explore Las Vegas, isn’t that right Gyu Gee Gee?” Sunggyu gave a nod with a teasing grin, and now I was positive I did not like where this was going.

 

Hoya laughs before grabbing me in a hug and whispering in my ear. “Don’t look so frightened. I can teach you how to put them in their place." He rises his voice to address the group. "We’re going now, is maknae line okay on their own?”

 

Sungjong scoffs. “We’re not babies, _Hoaegi._ We can take care of ourselves.”

 

“Ya! You better show me respect!” Hoya retorts, and they get into a playful little tiff. Everyone gets up ready to split up on their own, looking excited about the day. Except for one.

 

“Manager hyung says that we have to go to the stylists for the photo shoot at two. So everyone better be back at the hotel and ready to go at 1:45!” Sunggyu shouts over the chaos, and everyone mumbles in understanding before making their way out the door. Sunggyu gives me a quick kiss, and leaves with Dongwoo first.

 

“Myungsoo!” I call out to him, and he finally looks up at me. I pull him into a hug. “Do you want to come with me and Hoya?” I whisper to him, and he looks at me confused. “I can tell something’s off. You didn’t seem excited to be with Sungyeol and Sungjong.”

 

He looks at the ground guiltily. “It’s okay hyung. You don’t have to worry about me. I’m just going to go take pictures on my own.” I nod in understanding, we all know how much Myungsoo loves his camera but I can’t shake the feeling that something is off with him.

 

“You know that things hurt worse when you keep them to yourself.” I tell him, and he smiles sadly.

 

“Myungie! Are you coming or not?!” Sungyeol is holding the elevator at the end of the hall, Sungjong and Hoya are already inside. I see the flicker of sadness in Myungsoo’s eyes, before he masks it with a smile.

 

“That’s okay Yeollie! You go on without me, I’m going to take pictures!” Sungyeol nods, before waving bye with a gummy smile.

 

“Hurry up Woohyunnie!” Hoya teases, and normally I would tease back but I’m too caught up in watching Myungsoo. He turns to me, the fake smile still on his face.

 

“I’m glad that last night worked out for you and Sunggyu hyung. It’s good that you got your happy ending.” He turns to go but I catch his arm.

 

“Maybe I can help you get yours?” I tell him, and Hoya is yelling for me again.

 

Myungsoo shakes his head. “It’s not possible, but thank you anyway.”

 

“God damn it Woohyun, I’m starving get your ass in here!” Hoya yells but I ignore him.

 

“I’m going hyung, you should too. You have someone waiting for you.” He turns around and makes his way to his room, and my heart feels troubled in a way that I haven’t felt in a long time.

* * *

A/N: Things to look forward to next update~

-Donggyu being BFFs ~~power bottoms sharing tips~~  
-Wooya being bros ~~doms sharing tips~~  
-Woogyu "relaxing" together after a long day of dealing with the kids' drama  
  
 


	15. desire

Sunggyu and I often find ourselves shopping together; I am the only one who will give him an honest opinion on his fashion choices and he seems to be the only one capable of stopping me from emptying my bank account on accessories.

 

There are countless unique trinkets on the strip, seriously who even cares about things like designer jeans when there are so many earrings, bracelets, and rings to choose from? Regardless, my focus is actually on the person blushing behind the rack of clothes trying very hard to seem nonchalant about the matter at hand.

 

I set down the fang earring and make my way closer to him. “Gyu Gee Gee, no need to be shy around me! I want to hear everything! And don’t act all coy, you know Woohyun is spilling all of your dirty secrets to Hoya as we speak.”

 

Sunggyu can’t argue with my logic. “I know, but that’s because he sees Hoya as his love coach for reasons I do not understand. Seriously I wouldn’t be surprised if Hoya gave him sexual to do list now that we are doing… well it.”

 

“One, you should be so lucky because Hoya can be quite creative. And two, how is that any different from our discussions?”

 

Sunggyu looks adorably flustered. “Well our discussions are about mutual pleasure and have no hidden agendas! I wouldn’t be surprised if Hoya tells Woohyun to tie me up and spank me, just to get me back in a roundabout way for kissing you forever ago.”

 

I laugh, a little loudly, because that is entirely plausible. “What can I say, Hoya can be a bit possessive. And again, you should be so lucky because spanking can feel really fucking good.”

 

“What are you talking about? The point of it is to hurt!”

 

“Exactly. It hurts so _good_.” I sing cheekily and he pushes me out of the store. Sunggyu wraps an arm around my shoulders, and we stroll down the strip in the sunshine together. We stop by an outside vendor to grab a frozen drink, and it makes the hot temperature that much more bearable. “Fine, at least tell me that it was worth the wait.”

 

 “Oh it was. _He was._ I mean, I knew he would be but, it was just, you know…”

 

I burst out laughing again, because Sunggyu is so embarrassed that his lisp is starting to come out. “Aish, you asked! How dare you laugh at your hyung this way?”

 

“I’m not laughing at you Gyu Gee Gee, just the situation. It’s fun to see you blush over our little Namu! I should send him a picture, I’m sure he’s already missing you!”

 

“Ya! Don’t you dare! To think that this is the way you treat me after everything I risked for you yesterday.”

 

I break free from his hold to playfully bow at him. “You’re right, I am forever indebted to you for your thievery. Your risks definitely paid off.”

 

Sunggyu quirks in eyebrow at me playfully and pulls me back in. “So the commander hat was everything that Hoya dreamed it would be?”

 

Now it’s my turn to blush. “Yes, he definitely enjoyed the look. That combined with your little idea of a game and he was hooked. I’ve never seen him look so frustrated and pleased at the same time.”

 

“That guy is always trying to be in control of everything. So I figured it would totally put him out of his comfort zone, but I knew he would end up liking it. I take it you didn’t even have to ask him to play along?” I shake my head and he laughs wholeheartedly. “You’ve got Hoya completely under your spell, it’s actually quite hilarious that he pretends to be the one calling the shots.”

 

“Humoring our dongsaengs is what makes us such great hyungs. And boyfriends for that matter. But I will say that the teasing just made him that much more riled up once I finally allowed him to touch me. You should take your own advice and try the delayed gratification act with Namu.”

 

“I’ll have him add it to Hoya’s to-do list.”

 

“Right after the spanking?”

 

“I’ll spank _you._ ” He moves an arm to swat me, and I dance out of his reach before he can hit me. I try throwing hearts at him to make amends, but apparently that only works for Woohyun. He redoubles his efforts to attack me after my greasy antics, but soon enough we are laughing again while enjoying the scenery together.

 

* * *

Hoya and I settle on going to In-N-Out Burger; the place is kind of legend among idols for being so delicious and after getting a taste I completely agree. We both wolf down our first combo meal, and end up going back for seconds. I’m feeling pleasantly full when Hoya starts his line of questioning.

 

“So is it time to step into my office again, Mr. Nam?” He wriggles his eyebrows while taking a sip of his coke.

 

“You are so ridiculous.”

 

“And yet, you still keep coming back for advice.” Hoya countered.

 

I roll my eyes. “That’s because you just so happened to catch me when I was vulnerable and love sick over my seemingly untouchable leader. You tricked me into confiding in you, and now it’s just become second nature.”

 

“Hyung doesn’t love me anymore?” Hoya pouted, which was a strange mix of terrifying and cute. His aegyo was so random that I never knew how to handle it.

 

“Fine, I love you Hoaegi. Now stop it before I smack you.” He smiled haughtily before getting that devious look in his eyes again.

 

“So you didn’t try any of my tips last night?” He deadpanned, and I still had it in me to blush.

 

“Okay fine, I did. You’re the master. But it was so worth it, Gyu was just… perfect. He’s so beautiful, you know, and there was this moment last night when I just knew it… that he was the one. He was lying there, adorably spent, and he just looked at me and it took my breath away. I knew I loved him before, but last night just solidified all of my feelings. He’s perfect for me, he was made for me, and I’m never going to let him go. I know he feels the exact same way, and I’ve never been happier.”

 

Hoya stared at me for a couple of seconds before pointing to the door. “Get out of my office.”

 

“Ya! Why? You told me to tell you about last night!”

 

“Yeah, I wanted to hear the exciting parts that involved no clothing and rigorous activity. I don’t want to hear your greasy love confessions! Save that for your hamster.”

 

I looked at him scandalized. “What kind of terrible, nymphomaniac best friend are you? I just told you that I’ve found my soul mate, the person that I’m going to spend the rest of my life with, and all you can think about is sex!”

 

“Your fated love is old news! Everyone in the group knows you’re practically married already! I wanted to hear about the good parts, like if Sunggyu hits the high notes when your pounding his-”

 

I smacked him on his head. “Don’t you talk about my baby that way! That knowledge is private!”

 

“Best friends don’t keep secrets! I’ll tell you right now that Dongwoo is a screamer. His voice actually does go up more than a couple octaves when we’re fucking. Which is great, because he actually has a knack for dirty talk-“

 

I covered my ears. “I hear nothing. Dongwoo is a precious baby angel.”

 

Hoya leered at me. “He wasn’t last night when he was riding me with nothing on but that commander hat. He was actually roleplaying some type of dominating master fantasy at the time, which was nicer than I thought it would be but you better believe I punished him for denying me his touch once I got back in control.”

 

I shook my head. “You should be ashamed. You’ve corrupted my innocent Dongwoo.”

 

“He hasn’t been innocent for awhile, if you know what I mean.”

 

 “You. Are. Horrible!” I accentuated each word with a smack.

 

“You should be nicer to me. And to think, I was actually considering letting you borrow the commander hat. It’s not like you would appreciate Sunggyu wearing that and ordering you around.”

 

“And yet you are highly convincing.” I ruffled his hair affectionately, and now he swatted my arm away.

 

“Oh how the mighty fall. Fine, I’ll go easy on you and let you keep the details of your special first night to yourself. But I _will_ expect them in the future.”

 

I nodded my head. “Sounds reasonable enough.”

 

“But I do have one question.” He smirked at me and I could sense the gears turning in his head.

 

“I should have known there was a catch. I’ll answer just one question though.”

 

“How many times did you make him come?” I felt my cheeks heating up and I tried to hit him again. He was just laughing at me, obviously pleased with himself. “You said you’d answer, don’t even try to back out of this!”

 

“But that question reveals so much!” I pouted.

 

He gave me one of those sassy looks that only his face was capable of making. “Exactly, why do you think I chose it?”

 

“You’re entirely too conniving for your own good.”

 

“Complimenting me won’t get you anywhere, now quit stalling.”

 

I groaned in frustration; I could already feel the blush creeping into my cheeks. I mumbled the answer, and he made a show of cupping his hand around his ear.

 

“I’m sorry what was that?”

 

“Three times! I’m not speaking to you for the rest of the day!” I got up from the table, and threw away our trash before stomping out of the restaurant.

 

Hoya followed me, the laughter still ringing loud in my ears. “Three times? You really _are_ my protégé!”

 

* * *

I napped for a couple hours before heading out in the afternoon; I figured I would take advantage of the empty room to catch up on some sleep before our schedules started. The photo shoot wasn’t too bad; the desert was just as hot as I expected to be so I didn’t really have any complaints. I was fascinated by the different landscapes in America, and I took a lot of pictures of simply the nature around me during our breaks.

 

Las Vegas was absolutely gorgeous at night. There was a certain level of excitement in the air with all of the flashing neon lights and colorful characters on the strip. Some of the guys were talking about hitting the casinos, but I wanted to be alone. Woohyun really tried to convince me to join them, but I stuck to my decision. He had actually been clinging to me ever since the shoot started. It was strange at first because I expected him to be all over Sunggyu considering recent events. But after awhile it was actually kind of nice to feel his presence by my side, an arm around my waist or a head leaned on my shoulder. The photographer had actually seen our dynamic, and liked our interactions enough to take a couple shots of just the two of us.  After the schedule wrapped I could tell by the look in Woohyun’s eyes that he wanted to talk to me, but I respected him for not pushing the issue.

 

I wanted to get a different lens to get some higher quality pictures of the nightlife, so after waving a quick goodbye I headed back to the hotel room. I was rummaging around my luggage when I heard the door open; I knew it could only be one person. I felt a knot building in my throat, but I forced it down to speak to him. “I thought you were going with the other guys?”

 

He made a sound of disagreement, before I heard the thud of his body collapsing on the bed. “Didn’t feel like it, I’m too tired to lose my money in a casino.”

 

I nodded, finally finding the lens that I wanted. “I’m just going to go take pictures.” He probably already knew that, but I felt the need to fill the silence.

 

“You’ve been taking pictures all day.” Sungyeol says this with an edge of sorts, and it rubs me the wrong way.

 

It isn’t fair for me to be rude to him, it’s not his fault that I feel the way I do after last night. So I push my feelings down and respond with a smile. “Of course. There are a lot of beautiful things to take pictures of here.”

 

Sungyeol laughs, but it sounds sad. “Just not me, right?”

 

I turn around then, looking at him for the first time since he has entered our hotel room. He’s lying down on the bed on his stomach, picking at the strings of the blanket while wearing a gloomy expression. It confuses me, and I find myself walking over to the bed to sit next to him. “What do you mean?”

 

Sungyeol sighs, and runs a hand through his hair. “It’s because of this, isn’t it? Because I cut my hair? I wanted to be manly, I wanted-“ He pauses, suddenly looking away from me. “someone to notice me. But it turned out like this and now my face looks fatter than ever-”

 

I’m not exactly sure how we got on this subject at all. “It doesn’t. What-”

 

“You haven’t taken any pictures of me.” My mouth is gaping and I probably look like a fish, but I am truly perplexed on why this is an issue. Sungyeol finally looks at me again and I am caught off guard by the unshed tears in his eyes. “You take pictures of things that you think are beautiful… of things that you like. Ever since I got this haircut you haven’t taken any pictures of me.” It clicks into place in my mind and suddenly I feel like the worst person in the world.

 

“Yeollie that’s _not_ it. We were busy yesterday with the plan, and then today I thought you wanted to hang out with the others. I-“ I pause, I can literally feel my ears turning red but I know that this is important. “I think you are beautiful Yeollie. I always have. The haircut looks great on you, seriously, it does. And your cheeks are one of the things that make you, _you._ They’re cute, and they look like they would be fun to pinch, and yeah…” I feel completely embarrassed that I just said all of these things, but when I see the smile on his face I know it was worth it.

 

“You want to pinch my cheeks Myungie?” He teased, and I actually did it to mess with him. They are as soft as I thought they would be, and his gummy smile just gets wider. He pinches mine back and we laugh together for a little while.

 

His eyes are bright and happy again, and I am glad that I was able to make him feel better. It’s kind of crazy how he can go from one end of the emotional spectrum to the other but that’s just how Sungyeol is, especially when he is being insecure. “Trust me, whoever you wanted to impress… I’m sure that they noticed.”

 

Sungyeol looks shy again, and he rests his head on my knee. “Yeah, I’m glad they did.” I give his cheek one last squeeze before hopping up from the bed. “Come with me.”

 

Sungyeol gets up on his elbows, looking interested. “Where?”

 

I shrug my shoulders. “I don’t know. Let’s just go explore _._ ” I hold up my camera. “And I can take pictures of you. If you’re not too tired that is…”

 

“I’m never too tired to hang out with you Myungie.” He hops out the bed with a renewed sense of energy and leads the way out the door.  We don’t even leave the hotel for at least an hour, finding funny things to take pictures in front of and at one point Sungyeol pretends to take a nap on the rail of a staircase. Sungyeol isn’t the most photogenic of the members, but he is clearly the most fun. He has me laughing so hard, in that special way that only he is capable of. It’s like Los Angeles all over again, with Sungyeol pointing and running and screaming at everything. His enthusiasm is contagious and I found myself following him along with no hesitation.

 

Before long we end up back in front of the Bellagio, watching the beautiful light show created by the fountains. Sungyeol seems mesmerized again, and I’m so glad that I asked him to spend time with me tonight.

 

I lift up to take a picture of him in front of the water, and the camera beeps angrily at me. Sungyeol turns to me with a questioning gaze. “Seems like that was the last picture of the night. The camera’s memory is full. It was a great picture though.”

 

“Let me see your camera.” I pull the neck strap over my head and hand it to Sungyeol. He smiles at the picture and then his fingers travel over the device.

 

“Don’t press that one, you’ll delete it.” He doesn’t listen to me though, and before I can stop him the image is erased from the camera’s memory.

 

“Why did you do that? I really liked that picture of you.” I mean sure I could take another one, but for me photography was about real moments captured by the lens; not staged pretenses.

 

“Because the last picture of the night can’t just be of me.” He wrapped an arm around my waist to pull me closer, and held the camera up in the air. “It needs to be of the both of us, together.” My heart beats just a little bit faster and I let myself mold into his warmth. "Kiss me on the check.”

 

“What!” I definitely wasn’t expecting him to say that, and he brings the camera back down and smiles at me.

 

“Just think. One day we’ll look back on this night, and we’ll remember that I had a moment of self loathing where I thought my face looked fat because of my haircut. But then we can remember that you said you liked my cheeks, and that you thought they were cute. So if we can take a picture with you giving me a kiss on the cheek, it will be a reminder of a happy memory of us together. Right?” 

 

I hope that the night sky hides my blush because I know I must be turning red. “Right.”

 

“You ready?” He lifts the camera back up, so I lick my lips and nod. I wrap my arm around his back and turn to face him. I stand on the tip of my toes so our heights can be even, and I feel his grip tighten on my waist. “Three, two…” I let my eyes slip closed, and I press my lips to his cheek. It’s soft, and I can feel his smile growing bigger.

 

“One.” The flash goes off, but neither of us moves away. Sungyeol turns his head to look at me and I can feel his breath ghosting over my lips. It’s too much, and if I don’t put some distance between us I might do something I can’t take back. So I step away, and Sungyeol places camera strap back around my neck. “See? Now that is a picture we’ll never forget.”

 

I ran my fingertips over the tiny screen. Aesthetically, we look beautiful separately; Sungyeol’s big eyes are sparkling and his perfectly straight smile is wide, my jawline looks pronounced and my lips are puckered on his cheek just so. But _together…_

 

I turn off my camera; I don’t want to risk losing the picture. I’ll cherish it, I’ll cherish this moment together, and the way he smiled all because of me. “You were right Yeollie. We look much better together.” In fact, together we looked perfect.

 

Almost as perfect as it feels when Sungyeol hands me back my camera as his lips press against my own cheek to return the kiss.

* * *

 

 

Sunggyu and I ended up accompanying Hoya and Dongwoo to the MGM Grand, the largest casino on the strip. Dongwoo was actually quite good at Roulette, which I attributed to him just being a lucky person in general. I had fun taking Sunggyu around to the different slot machines; I wasn’t really one for gambling.

 

Hoya ended up spending his night at the poker table. It was no surprise that he was a natural at the game; his sharp mind and cunning nature made him a fierce opponent. Not to mention the fact that his poker face was pretty much unbeatable. Dongwoo, Sunggyu, and I ended up being his cheerleaders as his winnings grew as the night went on. By the time we left the casino, Hoya was a whole lot richer and our boyfriends were a lot less sober.

 

It was well past midnight; Dongwoo and Hoya wanted to go to a club, but I could tell by the look in Sunggyu’s eyes that he was too far gone to stay out. We bid them farewell and made our way back to our hotel room. Sunggyu was hanging all over me as I unlocked the door, and it took quite a lot of effort to get us inside.

 

“Woohyunnie, I want to play more! I want to go dancing with Yadong! HAHAHA. Yadong. Porn. Let’s watch porn. Let’s make our own porn.” He pushed me to the wall and groped my crotch roughly, and I had to pull his hand away. He looked confused at his empty hand, and I had to hold in my laughter. He pretty much turned into a big baby when he was drunk; it was probably the most adorable thing I had ever seen.

 

“We can make porn another night baby, but right now you need to lay down. You’ve had a lot to drink tonight.” Even though I forced him to drink a couple of water bottles on the way back he was still a little unsteady on his feet. I lead him over to the bed, and he sat down with a huff. He crossed his arms angrily, and purposely turned away from me. “Aw, don’t be like that love.”

 

“You’re a fun vampire. You suck out all of the fun!” I laughed at him openly now, and he lifted his chin up higher in annoyance.

 

“Stand up, let me undress you Gyu.” He stood up with another huff, still refusing to make eye contact with me. I pushed my hands underneath his shirt, making sure my hands made contact with his skin as I pulled it off of him. I ran my palms down his sides before getting rid of his belt.

 

“What are you doing?” He whispered, trying distractedly to keep up his little shunning act. I got down on my knees, pulling off his shoes and socks, one by one. I ran my hands up his long legs, before starting on his pants.

 

“I told you, I’m undressing you. I want you to sleep comfortably.” I let my head rest on his stomach, my breath ghosting over his crotch as I pulled the jeans down. He was shifting around uncomfortably, and by the time he was naked he was already hard for me. I stood up, chuckling at the fact that he was still pretending to be mad, and pulled the covers back. “Come on, get in bed.”

 

“What’s in it for me?”

 

I placed at finger at my lip, pretending to think about it; in reality I was just drawing his attention to my mouth. “If you get in bed, I’ll give you a kiss. But just one.”

 

“Fine.” Sunggyu climbed in bed, lying down on his back with a pout. I pulled the covers up over him, and tucked him in. “Why aren’t you getting in bed too?” I ran my fingers through his messy hair; he was just too cute sometimes.

 

“I’m just going to take a shower baby. Then I’ll come back to you, I promise. Do you let fun vampires in your bed?”

 

He finally looked at me, dragging his eyes over my body to check me out. “I guess. But only because you are a very sexy one.”

 

I shook my head at his silliness and crawled on top of him. “You ready for your goodnight kiss?” He nodded, his lips still stuck out in that adorable pout. I closed my eyes and leaned down to kiss him, but I felt his finger instead.

 

I opened my eyes, waiting for an explanation. Sunggyu gave me a devilish smile and pulled down my head to whisper in my ear. “I said I wanted a kiss, but I never said on the lips.”

 

I smiled back at him, deciding to play his little game. “Then tell me where you want it Sunggyu.” He impatiently bucked his hips up, and I felt myself hardening.

 

“Kiss my cock Woohyun.” His eyes meet my own in a challenge, and I knew that I would inevitably give him what he wanted. I shifted down the bed, pulling down the sheets as I went, exposing his pretty pale skin.

 

His cock was already at attention, beautifully swollen as he waited for me to touch him. I wrapped my hand around his length, pumping it a couple of times just to make him squirm. I felt the beads of precum on my hand, and I used wetness to make my hand glide easier on his member. He was already moaning and I laughed at his desperation. “You’re already leaking Sunggyu, you must have wanted me badly. Just one kiss, right?”

 

His pretty long legs wrapped around my shoulders, and his fingers found my hair. “Do it Hyunnie.” I held his eye contact and took him in my mouth. I decided not to mess around; I wanted him to hear him scream and I wanted to make him come.

 

My hand kept pumping his length, and I sucked on the tip of his cock before taking him further in. He was already thrashing around, so I pinned his hips to the mattress with my free arm. I bobbed my head up and down, moaning and licking every inch of him I could reach. His grip increased on my hair, tightening as I continued to work him. His other hand was over his mouth, trying to quiet the desperate moans spilling out of his mouth.

 

I breathed through my nose, determined not to let go of him until I’d made him reach his completion. His thighs keep brushing across my face and his body jerks just so every time I run my tongue over his slit. I slow down my pace, hollowing my cheeks and moaning just to drive him crazy. I feel his hand trying to push me to go faster, but strength isn’t something that he exactly has in this moment.

 

His eyes are wide open and pleading, and this time I take him all the way in when I go back down. His tip brushes across the back of my throat and he starts to get frantic. “ _Fuck_ Woohyun, make me come. Please make me come, _oh god._ ” Both of his hands tangle in my hair now like he’s holding on for dear life, and curses are spilling out of his mouth.

 

I quicken my pace, moving my mouth over his cock with a purpose and I let my other hand drift down to his balls. This seems to do the trick, I can feel them tightening in my hand as his cock swells. He screams out my name and I feel his release hitting the back of my throat. I swallow it all, and pull off of his length with an audible pop. His legs are shaking, so I gently move them off my shoulders to rest on the bed. His chest is heaving, and his arm is blocking his eyes as he tries to catch his breath.

 

I moved up his body, pulling the arm away so I can see his gorgeous eyes. He has a silly little satisfied smile on his face, and I can’t help but smile back at him. “So-”

 

“Best kiss ever.” He exclaims, and I burst out laughing. I can tell he is blissed out because he doesn’t even bother to nag me for laughing at him. He just gazes at me lovingly, happy that I’ve brought him so much pleasure. I get out of the bed and pull the sheets back over him.

 

“I’m glad you liked it baby. Now get some rest.” I run my finger over his lips, and he beams up at me. “I love you.”

 

“I love you too Hyunnie.” I give him one last smile and make my way into the bathroom. I turn the shower lever, pulling off my clothes as the water warms up. I look at my reflection in the mirror; my lips are red and swollen from pleasuring Sunggyu. The sight sends blood rushing to my cock and I can still taste him in my mouth. I wanted to take him tonight, I had been craving his body all day but life had other ideas.

 

I stuck my hand in to test the temperature, and stepped into the warm shower. This hotel room had one of those fancy walk in showers made of all glass. The showerhead came out of the ceiling, giving the illusion that I was standing in a warm stream of rain. The water pressure felt fantastic on my tired muscles, the fatigue of the past couple days slowly falling away.

 

I washed my hair, working the shampoo into my dark strands. The fingers in my hair reminded me of Sunggyu, the way his hands tightened in my hair as he climaxed. I chuckled to myself; everything I did these days reminded me of my lover in some way, shape, or form. I rinsed it out and quickly finished washing my body.

 

I was technically done with my shower, but I couldn’t bring myself to get out of the water. I stared down between my legs, my cock still hard and angry after being ignored for so long. I wrapped a hand around myself, groaning at the contact. I let my eyes slip closed, imagining the naked boy in just the other room. I thought about his soft skin, the heels that dug into my back as he bucked off of the bed. “ _Fuck._ ” I moved backwards to rest against the cool glass, my head falling back as I pleasured myself. I could see Sunggyu so vividly in mind, could picture the small vibrant eyes and the pretty pink lips. Just last night I had been inside of him, feeling him all around my length as I claimed his body for my own. “ _Sunggyu._ ” I moaned out, tugging on my length as I fantasized about my lover.

 

“Yes?”

 

My eyes snapped open at the voice, and there he was. His hand was pressed up against the glass, his mouth open and panting as he stared at me. I was so caught up in my thoughts I hadn’t even heard him enter the bathroom. “What are you doing?”

 

He laughed and tilted his head, as if he was studying me. “And to think, I was actually unsure of who you were thinking about.” I moved to turn off the shower and his eyes stopped me in my tracks. “ _Don’t._ ” My hand reached for the door, but his hand reached the handle first. “I said _don’t._ ” I hesitated, standing in the shower in confusion. “I never told you to stop touching yourself.”

 

I could feel his eyes all over my body and I just wanted to touch _him_ but it seemed he had other plans. I shifted forward and placed my hand on his own, the glass pane preventing us from actually touching. I held his gaze as I obeyed his wishes. “I couldn’t sleep without you next to me.” He whispered, his eyes glued to the hand that was slowly moving over my cock. “I was selfish. I didn’t make you come.”

 

I give him a smile. “You always do, in one way or another. I can finish by myself, and then I’ll get in bed with you. You can go back.”

 

He shook his head at my words. “I’ll help you.”

 

Now it was my turn to shake my head. “Just the thought of you is enough. Go to sleep baby, you’re tired.” He didn’t answer me, his fingers moving to his mouth and he sucked them.

 

“Just watch me Hyunnie.” He leaned closer to the door, and pressed a kiss to the smooth glass.

 

“Sunggyu, what are you-” My words stopped abruptly at his moan.

 

“Can you see me in the mirror baby?” He whispered, his forehead falling to the glass. I _could_ see him, the actions now clicking into place in my mind as I saw the two fingers disappearing in and out of his entrance.

 

I let out a strangled fuck, this was the first time I had ever seen him do this and he was so fucking sexy as he pleasured himself. His mouth opened slightly, the glass fogging up because of his hot panting. I didn’t know where to look, there were too many things happening in front of me. “You’re gonna fuck me.” His tongue slid out of his mouth, licking the glass and I thought I was going to lose it. “You’re gonna fuck me real good Woohyun. I’m gonna work myself open just for you, and then you’ll pull me in to join me when you can’t stand it anymore.” My fingers tightened on the glass as his moans got louder. “Are you watching me?”

 

“I can’t look away. You’re so fucking hot Sunggyu. Put in another finger for me.” Sunggyu nodded, pushing in the digit with a slight groan. “Spread them apart baby. Just like that.” My eyes darted between the mirror and his face; I was hypnotized by the expression of pure abandonment as he prepared himself for me. “I’m not going to hold back. Once I get you in here, you’re _mine._ ”

 

He dragged his eyes open, staring at me with desire and longing. “ _Please._ ” That was my breaking point; I ripped the door open and caught him before he could fall. I pulled him into the shower and pushed him up against the wall. He moaned at the contrast of the cold wall and the hot water on his skin. I pulled his hands up the wall, pinning his wrists above his head with one hand.

 

“I’m going to give you what you want Sunggyu.” I ran my cock over his entrance, and he was already pushing back to feel me. I didn’t bother to ask him if he was ready, I knew he was. I pushed into his body, the tightness just as dizzying as it was the first time. I stopped for a moment, more to get a handle on myself than to let him adjust. I wrapped a firm hand around his hip and started pounding into him.

 

Sunggyu’s reaction was immediate, the desperate moans bouncing off the walls of the shower. The water just made the sounds of our hips clashing louder, and he looked so fucking good soaking wet. I knew I wouldn’t be able to last long this time, I needed him too badly.

 

I looked down between us, mesmerized by the sight of myself disappearing in and out of his body. Being a part of him again felt so right, and I drove into his heat over and over again simply because I could. His head was turned to the side, his cheeks pressed to the wall and his mouth permanently open as he cried out with each thrust. He tried to tug on his hands but I held them firmly, and I could feel his legs wobbling already. “You already want to come again baby? Just from my cock?”

 

He arched his back, trying to get me deeper inside of him. “ _Yes._ Please Hyunnie.” I turned him around and pushed him towards the glass that faced the mirror. I let go of his hands and he clutched the glass anxiously.

 

“I want you to stare at your reflection. Watch yourself take my cock.” I held both of his hips in my hands now, raising his ass up as I continued to thrust into him. He lifted his head to stare at us moving together, and he groaned with the new angle. “Just like that Gyu?” He nodded, out of breath and unable to firmly grasp on the glass in front of him. “Look at yourself. Look how your face changes when I’m fucking you good like this.”

 

“ _Woohyun._ ” His hand clenched into a fist, and he tried to reach back to pull me closer. He whispered out broken pleas for mercy, and I knew he was close. His head started to drop down again, and I forced his chin back up with my hand.

 

“Is this why you couldn’t stay in bed? You can’t fall asleep unless I fuck you?” He agreed, his moans getting louder as I continued to abuse his sweet spot.

 

“I want you to paint the glass with your come Sunggyu.” His hand reached to tangle in my hair again, and he came with a shout of my name. His body clenched down around my member almost painfully, and I felt my own rhythm begin to falter. I looked at our reflection in the mirror; my lips on Sunggyu’s neck with his head thrown back in bliss, the strings of white slowly running down the glass. I had been teetering on the edge of my orgasm for some time now, but that sight was enough to push me over the edge.

 

My grip tightened on his hips as I rode it out, slowly grinding into him as I came down from my high. I stayed inside of him for a moment, pulling his back flush against my stomach to wrap him up in a hug. “You feel so good baby.” I mouthed into his neck, and he smiled softly. I reluctantly pulled out, and the little gasp he made when he was empty again was adorable. I moved him more directly under the showerhead, letting the water wash away the traces of my release. I splashed some water to clean off the glass and finally turned the lever to off.

 

“Well. I needed a shower anyway.” Sunggyu stated matter of factly, and I burst out laughing. I pulled him out of the shower slowly; his legs were still a little shaky and I didn’t want him to slip. I grabbed the nearest towel, drying him off quickly before placing him on the counter. I moved the towel over my own body, giving him a playful smile as he waited for me to finish. I tossed the towel away and got situated between his legs.

 

“I haven’t got to kiss you in so long.” I whispered, before pressing our lips together. His tongue pushed my mouth open immediately, the kiss deepening as he ran his hands down my back. We kissed lazily, both of us spent from the events of the night. He finally pulled away to rest his head on the mirror, his hand cupping my cheek. I nuzzled into his palm, enjoying the soft touch. “Thanks for the surprise baby.”

 

He bit his lip, before leaning in to give me a soft kiss. “Anytime Hyunnie.” This time I was the one to deepen the kiss, enjoying the taste of him on my tongue. I felt his fingertips tighten on my shoulders and I forced myself back.

  
“We should stop Gyu.” I managed to break apart for a couple seconds before he was pulling me back in.

 

“Why? It’s just kissing.” He teased, biting my bottom lip with his teeth.

 

“It won’t be just kissing if you keep kissing me like _that._ ” Sunggyu pushed me away with a huff and got down from the counter.

 

“I guess you’re right.” He conceded, and grabbed my hand to lead me to bed. We climbed into bed together and got comfortable under the covers. I leaned over to switch off the light and pulled him close to me. He turned to his side to wrap a leg around me, molding himself to my body.  “I can’t believe we only have one day left in America.”

 

“I know. It seems like time went by so fast. But it will nice to be back home with you.” I gave him a soft kiss on his wet hair, and he snuggled closer.

 

“I hope tomorrow will be as great as today was.” He whispered and I tightened my hold on him.

 

“It will be. Any day with you by my side is amazing.” He playfully hit me on the chest for being greasy, but I knew he loved it. “I love you.”

 

Sunggyu leaned up to give me one last kiss before closing his eyes to go to sleep. “I love you too. Goodnight Hyunnie.” He yawned cutely, and nuzzled into my chest.

 

“Goodnight Sunggyu.” I closed my eyes and let the thoughts of Sunggyu’s smile lull me to sleep.

* * *

A/N: we all know Woogyu is sexual tension defined so of course they got frisky once they were alone again, no surprise there.   
  
  
  



	16. bonding

“Seriously, what’s wrong with you guys? Can’t you let this go?” Sungyeol complains, his already red face getting darker by the second.

 

“You have to answer, it’s part of the rules!” The maknae declares gleefully from behind his drink, his cat eyes grinning at the choding’s predicament.

 

I wasn’t quite sure how the seven of us had ended up here; we were planning on spending the last night in Vegas out on the Strip. After we attended the O Show with the rest of the staff, we were only supposed to run upstairs to our hotel rooms to quickly change. But then Dongwoo showed up because he wanted to borrow some bracelet from Sunggyu, then Sungjong had trailed in to make sure Dongwoo didn’t ruin his outfit, Myungsoo and Sungyeol arrived a few minutes later attached at the hip, and then finally Hoya appeared with some liquor and declared that the new plan was a private party in our room.

 

Now, a few hours and more than a couple bottles later, it was safe to say that the seven of us were definitely drunk. I couldn’t exactly remember whose idea it was to incorporate games into the drinking, but I was pretty sure that when the morning rolled around I would hate them.

 

“I bet you he has it.” I look down at the voice, smiling at Sunggyu’s prediction. He was resting his head in my lap, his cheeks flushed from the alcohol and a silly grin on his face. I comb my fingers through his pretty hair, caressing the silky soft strands in a methodic manner.

 

“You think so?” He nods cutely at me, his eyes curved into moons. I couldn’t resist leaning down to give him a quick kiss. “I think you’re right.”

 

I feel a shove on my arm, and I look to Hoya with a glare. “What?”

 

“Try to keep the PDA to a minimum, none of us came here for a show.” He teases me, and Sunggyu promptly kicks him from his position on the floor.

 

“You’d be doing the same thing if Dongwoo was paying attention to you.” Sunggyu quips, looking over at the rapper who was pinching Sungyeol’s face.

 

“They’re just so fluffy!” Dongwoo claims, making pleased noises as he plays with the overly full cheeks. Hoya grabs Dongwoo, forcefully pulling him back in his direction.

 

“Yeah, keep him in line!” Sungyeol pouts rather adorably, rubbing his slightly sore face. “Anyway, whose turn is it next?”

 

“But you never answered the question Yeollie.” Myungsoo says this quite seriously, making Sungyeol narrow his eyes in anger, and I decide to diffuse the bomb before it explodes.

 

“Yah, you can’t get mad at Myungsoo for stating the truth. Now quit stalling and answer the question.”

 

Sungyeol tries to play dumb, even though he knows exactly what we are waiting for. “I don’t even remember what it was!”

 

“Did you keep the dress from the Troublemaker performance, and if so, have you worn it since then?” Myungsoo repeats helpfully, although Sungyeol didn’t seem to be thankful at Myungsoo’s keen memory. He practically sneers at the visual, who looks back at him with innocent eyes. “What? I want to know the answer…” Myungsoo trails off, hiding behind his cup.  Sungyeol still feels betrayed, shaking his head at his supposed best friend.

 

I decide to speak up in his defense, feeling slightly sorry for Myungsoo, he is too far gone to realize that he isn’t exactly supporting Sungyeol’s fruitless effort to escape the task. “Come on Yeol, Myungsoo isn’t even the one who asked the question in the first place.”

 

“That would be me!” Sungjong sings out, waiving in Sungyeol’s direction in a clearly taunting manner.

 

“Okay seriously, now you’re just slowing the game down Sungyeollie, answer the question so we can keep playing!” Dongwoo whines, his small body rolling down on the floor next to Sunggyu, who cuddles up next to him instantly. They both grin up at me, and I can’t resist ruffling their hair affectionately. I could really care less about the game, but Sunggyu seems to be enjoying himself for I’m still playing along.

 

Sungyeol sighs dramatically, which only draws more attention to himself. “Fine! Yes, okay, yes! And I only tried it on again to make sure my figure was still good! Are you all happy now?” Sungyeol hides his face in his hands as the others laugh around him.

 

“I knew it! I always told you guys that hyung was prettier as a girl, and I guess he took my words to heart!” Sungjong teases, just barely dodging Sungyeol’s long limbed punch as he cackles.

 

“It doesn’t matter if he’s dressed as a boy or a girl, he’s pretty no matter what. He’s always been beautiful, it’s not his fault if you didn’t see it until he put on a dress.” All of our heads turn to look at Myungsoo, who suddenly looks sheepish at the attention, almost as if he didn’t realize he had spoken out loud.

 

“Myungie…” Sungyeol reaches out to touch Myungsoo’s arm, and he immediately shies away.

 

“Everyone thinks so! They are say you’re the visual too!” He defends himself, gulping down the rest of his drink. “I’m going to get a refill.” He stands up from the floor, disappearing to the far side of the hotel suite. I watch him go with curious eyes.

 

“Aw, isn’t that just sweet?” Hoya jokes, clearly unable to stay silent at the visual’s sudden awkwardness.

 

“Hurry up and pick your next target, Dongwoo is dying from anticipation.” Sunggyu orders, tickling the rapper playfully.

 

“I’ll just choose you then! Truth or dare Gyu hyung?”

 

Sunggyu looks up at me, biting his lip. “What do you think Hyunnie?”

 

“Yes, what should he pick Hyunnie?” Hoya repeats, in a mockingly high tone. Dongwoo wriggles out of Sunggyu’s arms, crawling over to his boyfriend to cover up his mouth.

 

“Dare.” I encourage him, lifting his head off my thigh so I could stand up. “Make sure you guys take a video if it’s good, I’ll be right back.” Sunggyu leans back on his hands, nodding to Sungyeol to accept the challenge.

 

Sungyeol smiles evilly, probably intent on getting revenge after his last revelation. “Jongie, grab your phone! Sunggyu has to dance to each girl group song that comes on his playlist for the next five minutes!”

 

Hoya pulls Dongwoo’s hand away, already reaching for his phone. “I’m definitely taking recording this.” Dongwoo tries to chastise him but Hoya was unfazed. “What? It’s not my fault that he’s drunk enough to take a dare from a passive aggressive choding. I will gladly reap the benefits of this for blackmail purposes later.”

 

I help a reluctant Sunggyu to his feet, placing a kiss on his cheek and whispering out a few encouragements before I move away to investigate Myungsoo’s absence. I notice the balcony door slightly ajar, so I grab one of the bottles of wine and head outside.

 

Myungsoo was sitting down on the ground, his back resting against the railing as he spins an empty glass around in his hands.

 

“Mind if I join you?” He shakes his head, scooting over a bit to make room for me. I took his glass from him, pouring the white liquid in before doing the same for myself. “Is everything okay?”

 

“Why wouldn’t it be?” He grumbles, taking a long sip of wine. “It’s just a game, it’s not serious.”

 

“You seemed pretty serious when you were talking about Sungyeol. When you said you thought he was beautiful.” Myungsoo freezes, his glass hovering in front of his lips.

 

“So what? I think you’re beautiful too, everyone in the group is. They’re just words.”

 

I think about the way Myungsoo acts around Sungyeol, the way his eyes follow him in a room and the way he lingers by Sungyeol’s side. “Are they? Did you say them because you were trying to impress Sungyeol, or did you say them because you really believe it, and you weren’t able to stop yourself in time?”

 

A bitter smile comes across his face and he stares up at the sky. “Am I that transparent?”

 

“No.” I tell him honestly. “I think the only reason I noticed is because I’ve been looking.”

 

“He doesn’t.” Myungsoo cuts in, his fingers playing with the rim of his glass. “Notice, I mean. Or really look at me for that matter. I’m just so… confused? One minute it’s like everything is perfect and we are closer than ever, and the next it’s like we are miles apart. I don’t know what he wants from me, or what I’m supposed to do.”

 

“You two have always been close… closer than anyone else in the group.”

 

“That’s because we’re best friends, nothing more.”

 

“But you aren’t okay with that.” Myungsoo looks at me, his eyes sad. “You want more, don’t you?”

 

“I don’t.”

 

“Myungsoo-”

 

“ _I don’t._ ” He repeated, looking down at the ground. “I can’t have more, so I don’t.”

 

“How can you be so sure?” Even if I wasn’t aware of Sungyeol’s feelings or lack thereof, it would hardly be a surprise if I were to find out that Sungyeol felt the same way as Myungsoo.

 

“He kissed me.” My eyebrows rose, but Myungsoo shakes his head. “Not like that… just on the cheek. But my heart-” He stops suddenly, his hand rising up to hold his chest. “It only lasted a couple seconds, his lips on me but-” Myungsoo slouches back against the railing, as if the energy has left him at the memory. “It was… _everything._ Better than any other kiss I’ve ever had and I’ve had my fair share before debut. What am I supposed to do with that hyung? How am I supposed to handle that, especially when I know what it means?”

 

“Sungyeol isn’t the type to go around kissing the members.” I softly remind him.

 

Myungsoo’s tone grew bitter. “Don’t give me false hope.”

 

“I’m not! I’m just stating facts. He cares about all of us and every now and then he’ll initiate skinship, but he _doesn’t_ go around giving people kisses on the cheek. That’s not his personality.”

 

“Then what are you trying to say?”

 

“That he did it with you for a reason, that maybe it’s special.” I sigh, trying to figure out a way to make Myungsoo understand. “Think about Dongwoo and Hoya. If you were to walk inside right now and cuddle up to Dongwoo, would he reject you?”

 

“No, hyung loves being close to people.” Myungsoo states, unsure of where this was going.

 

“But if you were to try to do the same thing to Hoya…” Myungsoo got the weirdest expression on his face, shaking his head at the thought.

 

“I wouldn’t, he doesn’t really like stuff like that.”

 

“But doesn’t Hoya let Dongwoo cuddle with him whenever he wants, without complaining?”

 

“Well yeah, but that’s because they’re together.”

 

“Because they have a special relationship with each other, that they don’t have with the other members. Kind of like you and Sungyeol, don’t you think?” I prompt him, and Myungsoo made a sound of understanding, although he still looks disbelieving. “Why are you so sure that he doesn’t feel the same way?”

 

“I just…” He looks down at the ground, his long hair falling into his eyes. “I don’t think Sungyeol would want to be with someone like me.”

 

“Like you?” I laugh, wrapping an arm around Myungsoo’s shoulder. “Myungsoo, you’re a wonderful person. You’re sweet and caring, not to mention you’re gorgeous! Sungyeol would be lucky to have you.” Myungsoo doesn’t seem convinced, his face still looking downcast.

 

“We want the same things, someone to love that we can cherish, but I’m not the one he wants…”

 

“And how do you know that?”

 

“Our last night in LA, we were talking about you and Sunggyu hyung-“ He pauses, blushing slightly again. “Not bad things, I promise! More about your… _situation._ ”

 

“Our situation? What do you mean?” I ask him puzzled. Myungsoo looks positively embarrassed now, covering his mouth as he murmurs out a response. I pull his hand away with a friendly smile. “It’s hard to understand you when you’re mumbling. You can tell me Myungsoo.”

 

“We were just discussing…” He looks at me with pleading eyes, and I decide to make it easier for him.

 

“Sex?” Myungsoo nods, still turning red to his ears at the word.

 

“Yeah… just about what we wanted, when we finally got to that point with someone special. And he said that he wanted romance, to fall in love…”

 

“Well that’s good Myungsoo, it sounds like he’s looking for someone who wants something real.”

 

Myungsoo sighs, his face devoid of all happiness. “Yeah… And when he meets that person, I’ll let you know. I’m sure I’ll be the one who has to hear all about it.” He scoffs, taking another quick sip. “Lucky me, right?”

 

“I don’t understand…”

 

“He told me that he hasn’t met someone who makes him feel that way yet, which is basically the nice way of saying he doesn’t like me.” Myungsoo finishes off his glass, placing it on the concrete. “It’s easy to forget that when we are alone together, having fun and being close. But he _doesn’t_ like me. And it doesn’t matter if he likes kissing me on the cheek, or if he likes hearing me call him pretty, because he _doesn’t_ like me. And I need to remember that. I _have_ to.”

 

“Myungsoo-“

 

“Thank you for listening. For being around the past couple days, I appreciate it. I really do.” He grabs his glass, standing up. “But things don’t always work out. There isn’t always a happy ending waiting for you at the end when times get rough. Just because you were lucky enough to find someone who cares, doesn’t mean that I will. So let’s just end it here, okay? I won’t treat Sungyeol any differently, he’s my best friend and he still needs me. I’ll carry this burden on my own.”

 

He tries to leave the balcony, but I caught his arm. “Myungsoo, don’t be like this.”

 

“Like what? Realistic?” He bit his lip, crossing his arms in front of his body. “I know I’m drunk right now hyung, and I might not even make sense, but I don’t want to lie to myself. Should I have drank so much that I slipped up and said what I did in front of Sungyeol? Probably not. Will it happen again? No. I just have to be more careful from now on, I don’t want to make him uncomfortable or make things awkward between us. If I can’t have him the way I want, I couldn’t bear losing his friendship too.”

 

“Myungsoo, it’s so much more complicated than that. You could probably hide your feelings for Sungyeol for a couple months, maybe even years. But Infinite is going to be forever, Myungsoo. Are you willing to lie to Sungyeol, to yourself for the rest of your life?”

 

“Hyung, don’t-” The sliding door opens up, revealing Sungyeol and Sunggyu.

 

“There he is!” Sunggyu drawls out, already latching onto me in mere seconds. I hold up his body weight, holding Myungsoo’s eye contact.

 

“You guys have been gone forever!” Sungyeol complains as he leans against the doorway. “Sungjong already left for his beauty sleep and we kicked out the rappers when Hoya tried to mount Dongwoo on the floor.”

 

“We should go to.” Myungsoo quickly slips past Sungyeol, and ducks into the hotel room, probably thankful for the chance to get away from me.

 

“Myungsoo-” I try to call out after him, but I was unable to really stop him with Sunggyu hanging onto me.

 

“It’s alright.” Sungyeol winks at me, grabbing the stuff from the balcony and bringing it inside. I follow with Sunggyu, holding him up firmly with a hand around his waist. “I’m sure Gyu hyung will appreciate the alone time with you. I’ll head back with Myungie.”

 

“Sungyeol wait.” He stops, setting down the empty glasses and wine bottle with an inquisitive look.

 

“Yeah hyung?”

 

“Just-”

 

“We should go Yeollie.” Myungsoo repeats, the door already open and his hand resting on the knob. “I’m sure that whatever hyung has to say isn’t that important.” Sungyeol walks over to Myungsoo, completely unaware of the mental battle occurring between me and the visual.

 

My only choice is to let him go, knowing that now wasn’t the right time; but our conversation was nowhere near over. “I just wanted to tell him to make sure you made it back to your room safe, since you’ve had so much to drink.”

 

Sungyeol wraps his arms around Myungsoo in a back hug. “Of course I will hyung! I always protect my Myungie.” He pats Myungsoo’s head affectionately; completely unaware of the way that Myungsoo tenses up at the touch.

 

“I’m sure you do.” Myungsoo looks away at my words, pulling Sungyeol out into the hallway and shutting the door behind them. I let out a sigh as I watch them go, more troubled now over the situation than I was before my discussion with Myungsoo.

 

I couldn’t get the image of Myungsoo’s face out of my mind, the sharp gaze and hard-set mouth not fitting the boy that I knew. Sunggyu, however, didn’t seem to be troubled in the slightest, if the lips creeping up my neck were any indication. “Finally, the kids are gone and I get to have you all to myself.” He pulls me further into the room, pushing me down on the oversized bed.

 

“Aren’t you sleepy? It’s getting pretty late.”

 

Sunggyu spreads himself out on top of me, practically gluing our bodies together. “What do you think Hyunnie?” He grinds his hips down on me with a teasing smile. “Do I seem sleepy to you?”

 

I shake my head at him, my hands rising up to settle on his hips. “Not in the slightest.”

 

“Then maybe you should do something to tire me out.” Sunggyu says cheekily, nipping at my lips. I let him pull me into a kiss, letting that warmth envelope me now that I can feel his touch. He helps me out of my shirt, his hands tracing up my stomach to rest on my chest. “Or maybe I can help you wake up?”

 

I feel his lips start to travel across my skin, little kisses in sweet spots that I wasn’t even sure existed before he touched them. It feels good, it always does whenever Sunggyu touches me, but my heart was still troubled. I close my eyes, trying to focus on the soft lips caressing on my body, but the nagging thoughts wouldn’t disappear.

 

Was Myungsoo right? Did Sungyeol really not feel the same way? But even when they went to leave, Sungyeol gravitated towards him, pulled him into an embrace… was it really strictly platonic for him? He had to care about Myungsoo, he just had to-

 

“Ouch!” I cry out, looking at Sunggyu with surprised eyes. He didn’t seem the least bit sorry, his fingertips rubbing over my reddened nipple after the harsh bite.

 

“I don’t like being ignored.” He states simply, his eyes narrowing. “And I especially don’t like you thinking of someone else when I’m on top of you.”

 

“It’s not like that.”

 

“So you really weren’t thinking of me?” He looks a little hurt, and tries to climb off of me. I didn’t let him, refusing to let him think that I wasn’t interested for even a second.

 

“Baby, I only think of you like this. Honest. What you’re doing feels good-”

 

“So good that you started daydreaming right after I started?” I shift up in bed, pulling Sunggyu into a seated position on my lap. I place a soft kiss on his cheek, nuzzling my nose into his face.

 

“Trust me, everything with us, everything about _you_ is perfect right now.” I smile at him, brushing his bangs out of his face. “This entire trip with you has been like a dream. Please don’t ever question that.”

 

“Then what’s the problem?” I sigh, not really wanting to go into it, especially when Sunggyu was so clearly in the mood for something else.

 

“Just don’t worry about it. Distract me.” I try to kiss him but he dodges it, his hand on my chest firmly holding me back.

 

“Talk to me. Get it off your chest.” He orders, but I try to hold out.

 

“This is a conversation that we need to have when you are sober-“

 

“I’m not that drunk!” Sunggyu protests, and I give him a disbelieving look.

 

“Baby, I had to physically hold you up on the balcony.”

 

Sunggyu grew red then, his eyes averting. “Really, I wasn’t. I just wanted to get rid of the kids so we could be alone together, so I acted a bit more intoxicated than I really was so they would leave.”

 

I burst out laughing, pulling him closer to me. “Ah, who knew that my baby would go to such lengths, just to have me all to himself?”

 

“Quit teasing me. And it’s not like my plan worked, since you aren’t even playing with me.” Sunggyu complains, his cheeks puffing out cutely.

 

“We can save it until tomorrow-” Sunggyu presses his lips against mine, pushing his tongue into my mouth. It was an aggressive kiss, his hands clutching at my shoulders and his teeth dragging against my lips. I closed my eyes, losing myself in the kiss, in the beauty that is Sunggyu.

 

“Normally, I would demand that we talk about it right now, because we both know that talking about things and being honest with each other makes everything better. But-” Sunggyu pauses, capturing my lips in another kiss, his tongue licking my teeth and his fingers tangling in the hair at the nape of my neck.

 

“But?” I prompt him, my tongue licking his jaw when we break apart.

 

“But I _need_ you right now. Inside of me.” Sunggyu whispers huskily, his eyes dark with mischief. “I’ve been thinking about you all night, about what we’d do once we were alone in this room, on top of this bed-” He tightens his grip on my hair, pulling me back into another heated kiss. “Maybe even on the floor this time, since we covered the shower last night.”

 

“God, you’re insatiable.” I slide my hands down to the small of his back, pushing underneath his shirt to feel his soft skin.

 

“Only because of you; I was never this needy until you did what you did to me.”

 

“So this is my fault?” I joke, feeling down to the curve of his ass.

 

“Yes.” Sunggyu grunts out, grabbing onto one of my hands, moving it deliberately to the front of his jeans. I could already feel his heat, his need for me. “It’s only right that you take responsibility.”

 

“I’ll always take responsibility for you.” I murmured against his hands, palming his hard length through the fabric. “Any way you want me; I’m yours.”

 

“What if I want all of you?” Sunggyu questioned, slowly moving his hips forward to rock against my hand.

 

“You already have all of me.” I whispered back with a smile, nipping at his soft lips.

 

“Take me again Hyunnie.” His pleaded, his fingers grasping at my bare chest, the look in his eyes unmistakable. I pushed back all the negative thoughts, focusing only on the gorgeous person in front of me, put all my energy into making him happy.

 

I tugged on his shirt, biting on my lip. “Get rid of it baby.” Sunggyu grinned at me, pulling it over his head in seconds, before diving back in for a kiss.

 

My hands were busy at his waist, moving quickly to get the jeans undone. He lifts his hips up, helping me help him out of his pants. I pull the material off his long legs, practically tossing them and his boxers across the room. Sunggyu giggles at my enthusiasm, but a firm hand around his length steals his laughter away.

 

“You too.” He whines, pulling my button open and dragging the zipper down. He slides his fingers underneath the cloth, gripping it tightly to move them off my legs. The moment we were both bare we feel into each other’s arms, our lips moving roughly together as the desire started to take over.

 

I push him to his back, his legs falling open naturally around my waist. I let my eyes run over his body, my fingertips trailing down his stomach with a smile. “Gorgeous.” I whisper, the front of my thighs pushing his legs further apart. “What do you want?” I lean down to press a kiss to his ear. “My mouth, my tongue?”

 

“Your _hands._ ” Sunggyu interrupted me, turning his head to run his lips across the line of my jaw. “Prepare me for you.” He demands, his tone insistent and his teeth sharp against my cheek.

 

I begrudgingly let go of him for a brief moment, reaching to the nightstand to get what he needed. Sunggyu was already desperate, stroking himself as he watched me with heavy lidded eyes. I started out slowly with one, but Sunggyu was impatient; his hips already moving and his voice calling out for more. Two turned to three, and Sunggyu’s voice was breathless as he begged to complete him.

 

“ _Woohyun._ ” He said sharply, his eyes bright with lust and his mouth already swollen from biting his lips. I slicked myself up, determined not to wait another second to be with him. I wrap my hands around his thighs, tugging him closer to line myself up at his entrance. He reaches down, grabbing my length to guide it inside of him.

 

“ _Fuck._ ” I gasp out, the curse falling easily from my lips when his tight heat is surrounding me. He feels so perfect, like he’s made just for me. “Sunggyu.” I call out, an iron grip on his hips as I wait for him to adjust.

 

“Move please.” He groans out, his gaze heated as he stares at my face. I tightened my grip on his shoulder, moving my length in and out of him in a slow pace. “Faster baby.” He urges me, his hands lifting up to settle on my hips. I stop holding back, letting go of any sort of restraint that I have left. I drive my length into him, hard and unforgiving, rocking his body with the force of my thrusts.

 

Sunggyu is vocal, so wonderfully loud each time our hips join together, crying out for more and moaning my name. I love him like this, open and desperate and desirable, all because of me. I’m not aware of time when I’m inside of him, there’s only his eyes and his lips and his beautiful body on my mind.

I change my angle, watching and waiting to know that I’ve find that spot deep inside of him. He goes quiet when I finally do, the silent loud in the air before his lips part in his loudest scream of the night. I bury my face into his neck, biting down on his shoulder as I move faster and faster into his body. I feel his nails dig into my hips, his thighs trembling against my own as he gets closer.

 

“I’m, I’m going to-”

 

“I know.” I whisper, kissing his sweat-slicked temple, the heat tangible around us. “Do it Sunggyu.”

 

He cries out my name, one last time before he succumbs to the pleasure, his tightening down around my length in that addicting way. It doesn’t take me long then, his blissed out expression and gorgeous body enough to push me into a hard climax.

 

I roll our bodies to the side, keeping our legs tangled together as we come back down.

 

“I love you Woohyun.” Sunggyu pants out, his hand curling around my face and his eyes still shut closed.

 

My lips press a soft kiss to his forehead, his nose, his lips. His opens his eyes blearily, a smile playing across his face as he looks at me. He leans foreword then, engaging me in a deep kiss that sends shivers down my spine. I pull him close again, burying my hands in his bright hair and breathing in his scent. Each and every time we finish doing this, I am struck by how much I never want to let him go.

 

“I love you too Sunggyu.”

* * *

 

“Did I interrupt something?”

 

I look over my shoulder at Sungyeol, but turn away instantly when I see that he is undressing, preparing for bed. “No.”

 

“You and Woohyun hyung were out on the balcony for awhile, so you two must have been talking about something serious to leave the party. Especially when Gyu hyung was about to humiliate himself to Girl’s Day!”

 

“Am I not allowed to talk to someone else?” I bite out, maybe too sharply because Sungyeol pauses at the edge of the bed.

 

“I didn’t mean it like that.” He mutters, climbing in next to me under the covers. “We just missed you two inside, that’s all.”

 

 _We._ Of course it was it was all of them, of course it was both of us; Sungyeol didn’t just miss _me_. I try not to be bitter, but it was hard when Sungyeol was laying in a bed right next to me, not affected in the slightest. I clutch my hand in the sheets, biting my tongue so I wouldn’t snap at him again. Sungyeol doesn’t deserve that from me, it wasn’t right for me to give him the cold shoulder.

 

I turn over to my back, letting myself look at him. The colorful lights from the nightlife softly brightened the room, illuminating the outline of Sungyeol’s face, his profile sharp and gorgeous in the darkness. I hate that his beauty is the first thing I notice, but with the short hair it was hard not to focus on all the angles that so prettily merged together to form his face. Even if I couldn’t have him the way I wanted, shouldn’t I be content that I got to be this close to such perfection?

 

“Yeol.” I spoke softly, reaching out slowly to touch him on the shoulder. He moves over towards me, the two of us lying face to face in the bed.

 

“Hmm?”

 

“I’m drunk.” Sungyeol lifts his finger to tap me on the nose.

 

“Me too.” His grin was big, blinding even in the dark.

 

“No, I know, what I mean is that _I’m_ drunk. And we both know that I say stupid things when I’m drunk.”

 

“One of your biggest faults to be honest.” Sungyeol complains, but his smile doesn’t disappear. I try to look away, but Sungyeol didn’t let me. “Hey, I’m still here, aren’t I? Gyu hyung didn’t appoint me as your chaperone all those years ago for nothing. The other guys say that I’m the only one who can understand you when you get like this.”

 

“You’re the only one who understands me _all_ of the time.”

 

“I could say the same thing about you Myungie. You know me better than anyone.” Sungyeol’s eyes look deep into my own, never flinching. He reaches out for my hand, intertwining our fingers together. “It’s why we’re so close.”

 

“You’re right.” I admit, my teeth biting down on my lip. “You always are, Yeollie.”

 

“We can talk about anything, can’t we?” Sungyeol asks, his fingers tightening around my hand.

 

Not everything, not the way I wanted. There were some things that had to be kept secret, like how I wanted nothing more than to place my hand on his cheek, pull his face close and bring our lips together. How I wanted to push his mouth apart, taste every inch and kiss him until he was breathless. I close my eyes, pushing down those feelings to the bottom of my stomach, far down enough that it wouldn’t show in my eyes, so Sungyeol wouldn’t know.

 

“Yeah… we can.” I swallow down the lie, doing my best to make it believable. “We do.”

 

“Good.” Sungyeol’s thumb runs over the back of my hand, light and comforting. His statement has a sense of finality to it, his gentle way of telling me that I don’t have to be sorry. It calms me in a weird sort of way, knowing that he already knew what I was trying to say without me having to say it. I let the tiredness start to take over me, but before I could drift off, he calls out to me again. “Myungie?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“The next time-” He clears his throat, his eyes fluttering before focusing on me again. He’s so beautiful; it isn’t fair how perfect he looks right now. How can I ever look away when I know that I have this by my side? “If something is bothering you… don’t go to Woohyun hyung.” His tone was serious, his grip still strong on my hand. “Come to me. If you need to talk to someone, choose me.”

 

“I will.” One way or another, I always seemed to choose Sungyeol.

* * *

 

Dongwoo lets his head drop back on the floor, a content grin on his face. “God, I could never get tired of you doing that.” He says honestly, his inner thighs brushing against my face.

 

I let his length fall out of my mouth, wiping away any excess of his pleasure. I crawl on top of him, moving his sweaty bangs out of his face. “You know that pleasing you is one of my favorite past times.”

 

“Aren’t I the lucky one?” He retorts, wrapping his arms around my neck. I nod, pulling our faces close. The kiss was unhurried, slow movements and hot tongues licking together. His mouth was always so hot, so perfect each and every kiss. I move away from his mouth, pressing kisses into the curve of his neck, my teeth occasionally dragging across his skin.

 

“This isn’t fair.” Dongwoo complains, his voice light in the air.

 

I move my mouth up to his ear, tugging on his lobe softly. “And how is that?”

 

“I’m completely naked and you’re not.” Dongwoo fists his hand in my shirt, tugging me closer to prove his point. “How did this even happen?”

 

“Let’s see. After we left the lovebirds’ room, I brought you back here. And the moment I got you inside, I got rid of your clothes and pushed you to the floor. Then I proceeded to give you one of the best blowjobs you’ve ever had-”

 

“How would you know?”

 

“Dongwoo, please.”

 

“Okay fine, it was amazing. But that doesn’t change the fact that I want you out of those clothes _right now._ ” Dongwoo pulls my face close again, kissing me desperately to try and get what he wants. He flicks his hips up, grinding his already hard again length into me, a broken moan escaping his lips at the friction.

 

I push his body away, feeling the smallest bit of sympathy at his cry of protest. I flip him over to his stomach, pressing my chest to his exposed back. “But I have other plans for you.” I push my fingers through his blonde hair, pulling the long strands back so I could see his face. “You look beautiful like this.”

 

“Hoya, quit teasing.” Dongwoo reprimands me, pulling my head down for another kiss. As much as I enjoyed the kissing, I had much more in mind. I move away from his mouth, pressing a kiss on the nape of his neck as my fingers taps on his lips. Dongwoo turns away, burying his face in the carpet. “I’m still okay from earlier.”

 

“Dongwoo.”

 

“You’re the one who insisted on sneaking out of the show halfway through for a quickie.” Dongwoo reminds me, pushing his hips back to feel my length.

 

“It’s not my fault; I told you that you look too good in white. My pretty little angel.” I praise him, my teeth biting into his shoulder.

 

“What you did to me in that supply closet was definitely not angelic.”

 

“And yet you loved it.” I reach down, wrapping my hand around his length, enjoying the way he sucks his breath in harshly at my touch. “You begged for it, savored every last minute, didn’t you?” I move my hand, starting up a slow rhythm that had him writhing underneath me.

 

“You’re sinful, making me do these things with you.” Dongwoo whispers, his fingers clutching unsuccessfully at the carpet.

 

“There can’t be light without the dark.” I taunt him, flicking my finger over the tip just to make him shiver.

 

“As long as I’m your other half.” Dongwoo confesses, looking back at me over his shoulder with large, honest eyes.

 

“Fuck Dongwoo.” Plans had to change; I couldn’t exactly fuck him on the floor, not after he said something as sweet and vulnerable as that. I pick him up suddenly from the ground, carrying him over to the bed with quickened steps. I lay him down gently on the mattress, staring at all the naked, pale, and _beautiful_ skin on display. “I love you, you know that?”

 

“If you love me, then you’ll hurry up and get inside of me.”

 

I couldn’t exactly argue with his logic, not when he was so pretty and desperate, staring up at me from his place on top of the sheets. My clothes are taken care of in seconds, his preparation in minutes. He was right, he was still ready for me because of our earlier tryst, but I couldn’t stop myself from being careful, making sure that I wouldn’t hurt him in the slightest. And then I was sliding into him, nice and slow as he clung onto me.

 

I ended up on top of him, his smooth legs wrapped around my waist. I kept the pace slow, sharing kisses with him as I move our hips together. He couldn’t stop smiling, maybe it was the alcohol or the way I was making him feel, I couldn’t be sure but I never wanted him to stop. His fingers were digging into my shoulders, his grip tightening as he pushed harder back against me. Dongwoo never was the most patient person once things got to this level.

 

My hand worked its way in between our bodies, stroking his member in time with our thrusts. His mouth fell open, his moans getting louder in the room as he got closer and closer to his completion. He opens his eyes up wide, a scream barely contained by my kiss as he climaxes beneath me. His body clenched down on my length, dragging me past my own breaking point as I follow him into the afterglow.

 

Dongwoo doesn’t let me go, pressing kisses all over my face as his hands explore my back. We didn’t talk much, just enjoying the silence and the closeness. I roll us over so he could rest on top of me, not the least bit bothered by the weight of his petite frame. Dongwoo rested his cheek on my chest, and I play with his messy blonde hair, closing my eyes as I let my body relax.

 

We stayed connected for a few more minutes, before I finally decided to start the process of resting. I slip out of him softly, placing a soft kiss on his cheek when he whimpers at the separation. I move away from the bed, grabbing what I needed to clean us up.

 

I pick up Dongwoo’s tired body, pulling back the covers and placing him back down softly. After climbing into bed next to him, I cover the both of us back up to fight off the chill.

 

Dongwoo immediately turns over to lay on top of me, a pleased smile on his face. “God, we are so screwed.”

 

“Literally?” Dongwoo pinches my side, and I laugh, letting my other hand fall down to caress his thighs.

 

“ _Metaphorically._ You realize that we only have a couple hours to sleep before we have to wake up in the morning, by which time we will probably still be slightly intoxicated, _and_ we’ll have to spend the entire day and then some travelling through airports before we get back to Korea? I’m going to look so horrible when we wake up…”

 

I shake my head, snuggling up tighter to him. “No way, you always look gorgeous.”

 

“You’re biased.” Dongwoo argues, yet he still places a kiss on top of my chest. “But thank you anyway.”

 

“I’ll let you borrow one of my masks in the morning, if that makes you feel better.” I lift up his chin, placing a sweet kiss to his lips to kiss him goodnight.

 

“Only if it’s the ‘U Say Ya’ one.” He responds cutely, his fingers lacing together with mine.

 

“Deal.”  

 

A smile comes across my face, our bodies fitting together naturally as we curl up next to each other to rest for the night. I give him one last kiss before closing my eyes for sleep.

* * *

A/N: #watchesuntiltheendoftime  



	17. patience

Sunggyu lifts up one of his pretty hands, his eyes darting around the terminal to count out the members one by one. It was cute, how he felt the need to account for all of us through each checking point in the airport, although it was probably unnecessary.

 

I step closer to him, my sunglasses effectively hiding my affection from the prying eyes around us. “You know, they aren’t _really_ kids.” I move my mouth closer to his face, whispering in his ear. “I think they can handle getting through an airport by now. You don’t have to worry so much.”

 

Sunggyu grins, and I’m close enough to see his eye smile from the sides of his shades. “We aren’t used to American airports and due to the fact that the majority of us are still dealing with the aftermath of last night’s celebration-” He sends a withering glance in Hoya’s direction, who actively pretends not to hear, “it doesn’t hurt to keep a close eye on everyone.”

 

This morning has been such a whirlwind; with the last minute packing and the rush to the airport, I’ve barely even had time to give him more than a quick good morning kiss. “Can’t we go explore Gyu? Just you and me? The airport is really big, we could play on the slot machines or something!”

 

“Yeah, because gambling in America will be great for our image.” Hoya mumbles next to me and I fix him with a glare.

 

“Seriously?”

 

“What? It’s true; even if the American fans didn’t get past security, our fansites still followed us here.” Hoya drawls out, his hands shoved into the pockets of his loose basketball shorts. I narrow my eyes at him, annoyed that he shot down my idea so swiftly as well as being lucky enough to be dressed so casually; curse him and Dongwoo for not having to worry about airport fashion.

 

“He’s right Woohyunnie.” Sunggyu stops our bickering before it even starts, shifting on his feet tiredly. “It isn’t a good idea to play around on any of the machines. I’ve seen more than one of them around.” He raises a hand, smiling cutely at one of his noonas for a picture before turning around to face all of us. “That goes for everyone. Don’t get into trouble and be mindful of who’s watching you.”

 

“Hyung, we know the drill already.” Hoya says monotonely, his hand messaging Dongwoo’s temples.

 

“Come on Gyu, we’re about to be stuck on a plane for _hours,_ let the kids play for awhile.” I brush my hand against his thigh, trying to convince him without being too obvious.

 

The leader looks over at the members; Sungjong looks flawless as ever but his eyes are a little puffy, Myungsoo is bundled up in way too much black, Sungyeol can’t seem to stand still for longer than a second, Hoya is acting like a crutch to Dongwoo, whose forehead is planted on the rapper’s shoulder, his small body sagging with the effort of staying upright.  Sunggyu sighs, glancing at his watch. “Fine. We don’t have to board our plane for an hour. But I want everyone at the gate within forty five minutes!” There’s a chorus of grumbles and agreements, cutting off any further instructions from the eldest.

 

The prospect of being let loose seems to invigorate the maknae. Sungjong grabs Sungyeol’s hand, wrapping their fingers together. “Hyung, do you want to go shop with me? I saw some nice stores earlier when we were in the security line!”

 

I notice Myungsoo staring at their hands, his eyes still fixed on them as the maknae pulled Sungyeol away from the rest of us without bothering to wait for an answer from the taller boy.

 

Hoya taps Dongwoo’s head lightly. “Do you want me to take you to the gate now? That way you can rest?” Dongwoo nods from his spot on Hoya’s shoulder, not even managing to look up. The dancer grins at him, wrapping an arm around the smaller man’s shoulder. “No more alcohol for you for a long time, huh?” Dongwoo shakes his head no, his eyes still staring at the ground. Hoya laughs, patting his arm. “I’m going to take this useless hyung to the gate.” Dongwoo groans, the sound pitiful even to our ears. Hoya looks over at Sunggyu and I with a smirk. “Just come find us when you’re done doing whatever it is that you’re so eager to do.”

 

I look back over at Myungsoo, who was standing there awkwardly, clearly unsure of what to do with himself. “Myungsoo.”

 

“I’ll just walk around on my own; I don’t want to get in the way.”

 

“ _Myungsoo._ ” I call out to him again but he shakes his head. Myungsoo turns to walk away but Dongwoo stops him, his hand reaching out to grab onto the younger boy’s arm.

 

“Will you come keep your hyung company?” His voice sounds tired but sincere, and I find myself being thankful for Dongwoo once again. I don’t know how he manages to be so in tune with all of us, but just hearing the sadness in Myungsoo’s voice was enough to make him reach out to the visual, despite his pounding headache.

 

“What do you think I was going to do?” Hoya says indignantly, and I promptly kick him in the leg. “Yah, why?” I try to subtly glance at Myungsoo, who looks more uncomfortable by the second.

 

“He’s right, you don’t need me to keep you company. I’ll just be interrupting-”

 

“No, I wouldn’t ask you if I didn’t want you to come with us. Do you not want to spend time with me?” Dongwoo was using his best pouty voice, the kind that tugged on your heartstrings and forced you to do whatever he wanted. Hoya often complains to me about the effectiveness of it and when I look back at the visual I could see him weakening.

 

“Myungsoo, you’re coming, and that’s final.” Hoya declares, and I almost find it funny how quickly he changes his position when he senses that Dongwoo might get upset if Myungsoo doesn’t do what his boyfriend wants.

 

Myungsoo looks at me somewhat accusingly, but even he knows that it would have been impossible for me to spill any of his secrets, since I hadn’t had the chance to be alone with Dongwoo since Myungsoo had told me about his feelings.  He sighs, ruffling his long hair and nodding. “Of course hyung, I’ll come with you if it makes you happy.”

 

Dongwoo lifts up his head, his mouth hidden by the mask but his eyes showing that he was smiling. “It would.”

 

“Okay.” Myungsoo agrees, readjusting his backpack and following behind the rappers dutifully. Dongwoo reaches out to take his hand, and pulls the younger boy closer to him to whisper a few words. It isn’t until Sunggyu nudges me that I realize that I have been staring at the three of them walk away.

 

Sunggyu gives me a quizzical look, his eyes narrowing at me. “What the hell was that?”

 

“What?”

 

“You and Myungsoo having a silent conversation, that Dongwoo somehow picked up on.”

 

“Dongwoo picks up on everything.”

 

“Don’t be cheeky. If there’s a problem I need to know about it.” Sunggyu says seriously. It’s kind of cute, watching him switch into his leader role so quickly. He feels obligated to know when anyone in the group was having an issue, always eager to take care of his members.

 

“Dongwoo is just making sure that Myungsoo isn’t alone right now… he was trying to close himself off but Dongwoo didn’t let him.”

 

“But why was he upset in the first place? Nothing happened, we just agreed to split up and explore the airport for a little while.”

 

“Yeah, and Sungyeol left with Sungjong.” I watch in amusement as Sunggyu crosses his arms, thinking it over.

 

“Those two have been hanging out alone a lot lately though.”

 

“Exactly. And maybe Myungsoo isn’t too excited about that fact. Or excited about _anyone_ getting too close to Sungyeol, really.”

 

“Does this have anything to do with last night? What you wanted to talk about before-“ He stops the sentence abruptly, licking his lips.

 

“Before what?” I tease, stepping in front of him, a bit too close.

 

“Don’t play dumb with me. If what I felt this morning when I woke up is anything to go by, you have a very clear memory of the things we did last night, _and_ you wanted more.” Sunggyu responds somewhat cockily, but the blush on his cheeks makes it a little less convincing.

 

“You’re right; I wanted to give you much more than a good morning kiss, but a certain someone was freaking out that we would be late to the airport…”

 

Sunggyu takes off his shades and rolls his eyes, widening his stance as he stares at me. “And we _would_ have been late if we fooled around. We weren’t even packed and I had to drag a bunch of hungover kids out of bed and into the van.”

 

I hold up my hands in surrender, the smile stretching across my face. “I know, I know. Just consider this my warning; expect for me to take what is mine as soon as we are back in Korea and alone. And with what I have planned for you, trust me when I say you won’t be saying no.”

 

The leader laughs, his eyes shutting into that cute curve. “As wonderful as that sounds, I have plans of my own for when we get back home.”

 

“Plans? What kind of plans?” I ask him, pouting again when he turns away from me to start walking down the terminal. I immediately trail after him, probably looking every bit like a puppy that wanted attention. “Yah, answer me-”

 

He turned on his heel suddenly, almost causing me to run into him. I force myself to a halt and look at the too innocent smile on Sunggyu’s face. “Don’t be so worried Woohyunnie; all my plans involve you.” He leans close to my ear to whisper, his delicate hand lightly squeezing my shoulder. “And trust _me,_ you’ll be more than thankful.”

 

I flicker my eyes over his face, shifting a bit anxiously. “You do mean sex, right? Because I’m thinking that you’re thinking about sex, and right now if you are thinking like me, then the plane ride home might be too long to wait, and you could be considering finding the nearest lockable room in this airport and getting rid of this tension, because with you whispering to me with your voice all deep and sexy like that, that is definitely what I am thinking-”

 

A sudden whack on my head jolted me out of my spiral into what was sure to become an explicit conversation, and I rub the sore spot on my head in shock. “Ouch, who even?” After wheeling my head around I spot the smiling choding, who waves cutely from a safe distance with the maknae.

 

“Yah, wasn’t it you who wanted to explore in the first place? Quit whispering to each other and actually go look around the airport!” Sungyeol says brightly, but right now I am consider him the enemy.

 

“Oh, and Sunggyu hyung?” Sungjong calls out, holding up his hand. “They have a frozen yogurt place at the A gate! You should try it, it’s delicious!” He takes a bite of his ice cream, trailing after Sungyeol with a pleased expression on his face.

 

“Yah, it better be the best ice cream you’ve had in your life!” I say threateningly, but the two of them don’t even acknowledge me, already walking into a new store to continue their shopping without even a backwards glance in our direction. I scoff, shaking my head at their less than impeccable timing. “Can you believe those two, we really shouldn’t let them hang out together, nothing but trouble…” When I look back in front of me to continue my complaints, Sunggyu is nowhere to be found.

 

I twirl on the spot, craning my neck around people to try to find my leader in the crowd. I spot him walking up ahead, and I jog to catch up with him. “Yah, why did you just leave me all alone? I probably looked like a crazy person, talking to myself. Where are you even going? “

 

Sunggyu simply smiles at me, not even bothering to slow down his pace. “Where do you think? The A Gate, frozen yogurt sounds delicious. I still have some American money on me, so I should be able to get lots of toppings. I’ll probably go for fruit… strawberries sound good-”

 

I stomp my foot and it probably looks childish, but I don’t really care. “Yah, Sunggyu we were in the middle of a very important conversation before those two devils interrupted us!”

 

Sunggyu chuckles, wrapping his arm around my shoulder as he steers us through the busy walkway. “You’re right; we were talking about a very interesting subject, weren’t we?”

 

“Yes, so maybe we should continue our conversation? A place more private, preferably somewhere I can get you out of those leather pants, seriously I told you that those are not allowed in public after that night, do you have any idea what I want to do to your thighs right now?” I question him, trying not to result to begging when I see the sly look still fixed upon his face.

 

“While those thoughts were very intriguing then Hyunnie, I think I’m in the mood for something a little different now.”

 

I lick my lips and ruffle my hair a bit, trying to make myself look as tempting as possible. I lower my tone, my voice coming out a bit husky. “What are you in the mood for Sunggyu?”

 

He tightened his arm around my neck, bringing my body closer to him. “Do you really want to know?” We were so close that I could feel the side of his body pressing up against me, and it took every fiber of my being to stop my hands from reaching out for him. I keep them resolutely pushed into my jeans pockets, nodding my head at Sunggyu’s question. He turns his face to the side, his nose brushing through my hair and his lips just barely touching my ear. “Are you sure?”

 

“Y-yes.” I say somewhat shakily, trying my best to look composed.

 

His fingers brushed underneath my chin, the touch light and teasing. “The thing I’m in the mood for-” He pauses, and I can see him grinning out of the corner of my eye. “Is ice cream.” He claps me once on the back, before letting me go and moving away with a laugh.

 

It takes me a moment to snap out of my daze, but once I do I immediately start to complain. “Yah, you’re so evil, how could you play with me like that?”

 

Sunggyu ruffles my hair affectionately, his face split with his grin. “Because it’s fun to tease you Hyunnie… and because Jongie’s ice cream looked really good. Now if you stop pouting, maybe I’ll share some of mine with you, how does that sound?”

 

I wanted to complain that ice cream in no way was equivalent to the things we were discussing earlier, but I know by now that it was a lost cause. “…Fine. But only because I’m in the mood for something sweet, and a certain someone isn’t being cooperative.”

 

“Aww, thanks for the compliment Hyunnie. You’re so cute, especially when you’re angry.” He pinches my cheek, stepping up to the counter to order his treat without another word. I want to try to argue that he shouldn’t find me _cute_ when I’m upset, but he’s already dragging me to a booth and offering to feed me some ice cream, and I’m painfully weak when it comes to ignoring him.

 

Once I settle down and Sunggyu is half way through his ice cream, he finally takes a breather to bring up the more important topic. “So I need to know about Myungsoo.”

 

I shrug my shoulders, not really sure what to say. “Honestly? There really isn’t much to tell. I had some suspicions after watching him the past couple of days, and when I confronted him about it he eventually admitted it to me.”

 

“Suspicions about what?”

 

“About him having feelings for Sungyeol.”

 

Sunggyu stops eating, lowering his spoon back to his paper bowl slowly. “Oh.”

 

I smile sadly. “Yeah. _Oh._ ”

 

“No, not like that.” Sunggyu sighs, leaning back in the booth somewhat tiredly. “It’s just… they’ve kind of always been a thing right? They’re best friends.”

 

“We both know how complicated ‘best friends’ becomes once feelings are involved.”

 

“Hyunnie…”

 

I shift to my elbows, resting my chin on my palm. “It’s… _weird._ I didn’t even know about Myungsoo’s feelings until we arrived in Vegas and yet-” I shook my head, looking at Sunggyu seriously. “I just _care._ A lot.”

 

“Why do you think that is?”

 

“I don’t know… he’s one of my members, my dongsaeng… he’s family. I want him to be happy. But he’s just so negative about the whole thing… he hasn’t even approached Sungyeol about his feelings, he doesn’t even know for sure how Sungyeol feels about him and yet all he is doing is punishing himself. Convincing himself that he’s not worthy of Sungyeol, that Sungyeol could never like him back. I just… when I look in Myungsoo’s eyes I can see that he’s hurting. And it makes me feel like I’ve failed him… as a hyung and as a member. I feel like I should have noticed sooner, that I should have been there for him. Even when I think about Sungyeol… I mean he is supposed to be Myungsoo’s best friend… how could he not notice that Myungsoo is in pain?”

 

“Woohyun… are you sure that this is about Myungsoo and Sungyeol?”

 

I scrunch my nose, looking at him confused. “What do you mean?”

 

Sunggyu reaches out, touching my hand lightly for a second. “It sounds like this might be about us.”

 

“But-”

 

“I was supposed to be your best friend… before we got together. And I didn’t know… I didn’t realize how much you were struggling… I didn’t know how much pain you were in. I didn’t take care of you the way that I should have.”

 

“Sunggyu, _no._ ” I squeeze his hand back, refusing to let him think that way for another second. “What happened between us… it’s different. I was so afraid of being rejected again that I pulled away. I couldn’t let myself be around you because I knew that you would see the truth. I didn’t want you to know how I felt, so I purposely didn’t let you in. That was my mistake; not yours. I know now that if I would have been honest with you about my feelings, the depth of them and what I really wanted from you, I could have avoided so much pain.”

 

“Well, maybe Myungsoo feels the same way?”

 

I cross my arms on the table, unsure of what Sunggyu means. “How so?”

 

“Myungsoo has feelings for Sungyeol, but he’s convinced that Sungyeol doesn’t feel the same way. So he’s hiding that part of himself from his best friend. It’s entirely possible that Sungyeol isn’t even aware that Myungsoo’s thoughts about him have changed. He doesn’t think Myungsoo is hurting because Myungsoo refuses to let Sungyeol see him hurting. Obviously he dropped his guard around you and let his walls down, but that’s because you aren’t the person he’s in love with. If he shows that side of himself to Sungyeol and Sungyeol actually doesn’t return his feelings, then he’ll have to deal with that. Maybe he’s just not mentally ready to face the possibility of a real rejection. So what he’s doing now, closing himself off and refusing to get his hopes up, that could just be his defense mechanism.”

 

“I just want to help him. When I was… going through what I was going through, Hoya and Dongwoo… I couldn’t have made it if it weren’t for them. They kept me going.” I admit, looking away from Sunggyu nervously.

 

But he just smiles at me, tilting his head to the side. “And I am thankful for them. So much more than you could ever know. I could never repay them for taking care of you when I couldn’t. But now that’s my job, and I’m not ever going to stop; taking care of you and making you happy is what matters the most. I love you Woohyun.”

 

I hide behind my fist, not wanting him to see the sudden wetness in my eyes. “Woohyun? Are you alright?”

 

I smile, the knowledge making me feel that much lighter inside. “Yeah… I really am. And it’s all because of you. I love you too Sunggyu. After what we’ve been through and what we have now… I’m just so thankful that we are together.”

 

Sunggyu nods in agreement, his eyes staring at me warmly. “That’s good; I feel the same way. And it’s okay for you to be worried about Myungsoo; it’s a good thing. Be there for him the way that Hoya and Dongwoo were there for you. If he trusted you enough to tell you the truth, then you should do your best to help him.”

 

“I will. I’ll help him as best as I can.”

 

“I know you will.” Sunggyu laced our fingers together briefly before pulling his hand back.

 

“Maybe… if you wouldn’t mind, I could sit next to him on the plane? That way he won’t be able to escape me, and I might be able to actually make him realize that he shouldn’t give up.”

 

Sunggyu didn’t have any problems with my suggestion, finishing off his ice cream with a smile. “That’s fine with me. You should do what feels right Hyunnie; try to talk some sense into him, but don’t be too forceful either.”

 

“I’ll try.” I tap my fingers on the table, my mind pondering the subject. “Do you think- maybe it could be possible…”

 

Sunggyu laughs, bumping my knee under the table. “Just ask me so I can answer pabo.”

 

“How do you think Sungyeol feels about Myungsoo? Honestly?” I ask him, eager to hear his answer.

 

“Let’s just say that I don’t think Myungsoo will be sad for much longer, if you can convince him to confess.” Sunggyu responds, his voice confident.

 

“How can you be so sure?” I’m surprised by how sure Sunggyu seems.

 

“It doesn’t matter what we are doing; singing, dancing, performing, whatever. At the end of the day, there’s only one person’s approval that Sungyeol wants.”

 

“Myungsoo.”

 

Sunggyu nods, his smile still in place. “Exactly. The way he depends on Myungsoo is special; it’s not just as a confident and a best friend, it’s like Myungsoo is his support system. Even if he has us, he’ll always go back to Myungsoo, whether he wants someone to laugh with him or someone to give him advice. Sungyeol doesn’t have that type of relationship with any of us, even if we are all close. I think that there’s a reason why Sungyeol always drifts back to Myungsoo’s side, no matter what.”

 

Sunggyu reaches out for my hand again, rubbing it lightly in a gesture of reassurance. “You just got to be a little patient Hyunnie; you need to have a little faith that things will work out for the best.”

 

“I hope you’re right.” I say honestly, trying to find comfort in Sunggyu’s theory.

 

* * *

I let myself relax in the chair, trying my best not to shift Dongwoo’s body with the movement. After walking to our departure gate Dongwoo had immediately sent Hoya on a mission to grab him snacks, and then promptly collapsed against my shoulder. I didn’t mind the closeness, if anything I relished in it. Dongwoo was always the hyung I was most comfortable doing skinship with, not counting Sungyeol of course. I drop my head to rest against Dongwoo’s, leaning a bit more into his body’s warmth.

 

“Are you tired too, Myungsoo-yah?” Dongwoo says, his voice still a bit husky with drowsiness, despite the fact that we’ve been up for a couple hours.

 

“I am, but I don’t think anyone had as much to drink as you last night hyung.” I respond jokingly. Dongwoo groans, shifting his head on my shoulder.

 

“This is all Hoya’s fault; he’s the one that decided that I should do shots. I don’t even _like_ shots.”

 

I smile, Dongwoo’s clear disdain at the moment a bit amusing. “It’s okay hyung. I’m sure you’ll find a way to get revenge. The only reason I’m a little better off than you is because I switched over to wine when I went out to the balcony.”

 

“You were out there for a while with Woohyun last night. Is everything okay?” I knew he was prying, but there was no insistence in his tone. Dongwoo was kind like that, he knew when to ask questions, but he also knew when to back off.

 

But even if Dongwoo was a good listener, I didn’t necessarily want to open up. It was already embarrassing enough that Woohyun knew my secret, I wasn’t sure if I could handle Dongwoo looking at me with pity too.

 

“Nothing really hyung. I just wanted to enjoy some fresh air and get away from the noise for a little bit.” I was lying through my teeth and I knew that _he_ knew, but it was the best I could do at that moment. Dongwoo patted my knee, the touch comforting and soft.

 

“Myungsoo-yah, we both know that isn’t true.”

 

“Hyung-”

 

“It’s okay.” He cut me off quickly, but a smile was on his face. “I’m not going to force you to talk about it if you don’t want to. But I just want to make sure that you know that I’m here for you. I care about you Myungsoo-yah.”

 

I wrapped my arm around his back, rubbing his arm slowly. “I know hyung. Thank you… really. For not pushing me when I’m not ready.”

 

“But you _do_ need to talk to someone Myungsoo-yah. If that someone is Woohyun, then you shouldn’t hold back; you should go to him. But you can’t keep it all bottled in, you’ll only end up hurting yourself more that way. It hurts hyung to see you act sad… I want you to smile for me. Can you do that for hyung?”

 

He looks up at me expectantly, and I force a smile to my face. He shakes his head, a teasing grin still on his face. “No, I want the real smile; the dorky one that all the fans love.” He tickles at my waist, making me laugh a little, despite myself. “Ah, there it is! Look at those cute dimples, my cutie dongsaeng, so handsome.”

 

“Yah, stop it hyung!” His fawning was making me blush and giggle. I don’t even know how he made me feel better so quickly, he just had that ability to make people feel less lonely.

 

“Just promise me that you’ll listen to my advice? And if you ever feel like it’s too much or if you feel like you’re alone, that you’ll ask me for help. I just need to know that _you_ know that I’m here for you.”

 

I pat his head affectionately, “Of course I do hyung. You take care of me well.”

 

“Hopefully not too well.” Hoya’s voice made me jump, but there was no malice in his tone. He looked at the two of us warmly, making no moves to reclaim Dongwoo’s attention.

 

Dongwoo nudges Hoya’s leg with his knee, a bright grin on his face. “Don’t be jealous Hoaegi, you know you’re my favorite dongsaeng.” He turns to me, playfully pushing me with his shoulder. “But you are a very close number two Myungsoo-yah.”

 

Hoya rolls his eyes, slouching down in his seat. He hands his boyfriend a plastic bag, and Dongwoo actually perked up in his seat at the treats. He rifles through the bag, handing out the contents. “A water bottle for me and Hoya to share…” He starts with a cheery voice, “And Sour Patch Kids just for me!”

 

I grimace, not a fan of those types of candies. “You really like those sour things, hyung?”

 

“Mhmm!” Dongwoo says excitedly, setting his candy in his lap. “Sometimes you have to suffer to get to the sweeter things in life! I like those kind of things, the hidden surprises that you have to be patient for.”

 

“Lucky for you, right Hoya hyung?” I say teasingly, and Dongwoo bursts out in laughter. Hoya looks mildly impressed, his mouth slightly hanging open.

 

“Did Myungsoo just make a joke? Does Myungsoo make jokes now?” He asks Dongwoo, who nods happily.

 

“Yup! You better watch out; Myungsoo-yah is going to try to steal your spotlight with his newfound wittiness.” Hoya sighs, shaking his head as he gets comfortable in his seat again.

 

“Yah, look at what happens when I leave you two alone. We’ve been together for too long to start switching roles now; Myungsoo is the cute one and I’m the funny one. That’s how things are supposed to work.”

 

I find myself laughing at the ridiculousness of it all, and it feels kind of good to just be silly together. “Don’t be so worried hyung; I like being the most handsome one so I won’t give up my ranking.”

 

“Well in order to stay handsome, you need to eat well! The last treats are for you!” Dongwoo pulls the remaining items out of the plastic bag, holding out some cookies towards me. “Double chocolate chunk right? I always see you buying this kind when you go to the store. I even got you some milk to go with it!” He says cheerfully, placing them on my thighs. I stare down at the offering, my heart sinking when I realize the last person that I ate milk and cookies with.

 

Dongwoo notices my sudden change in mood, his hand reaching out to touch mine. “Myungsoo-yah? Is it not the right kind? Hoya can get you something else if you don’t like it…”

 

“No… it’s the right kind.” _I’m just not with the right person._ I didn’t want Dongwoo to worry more than I already knew he was, so I opened the bag and started to eat. I could feel the rappers eyes on me, but thankfully neither of them pressed the subject.

 

A few minutes later Sunggyu and Woohyun showed up, the two of them looking happier than ever, a sort of closeness that seemed palpable between them. I feel a spark of jealousy start within me, and I do my best to push it down. Woohyun’s gaze immediately settles on me, and I busy myself with eating to avoid his look.

 

Dongwoo starts a conversation, trying to clear the awkwardness. “So… did you guys have fun exploring?”

 

“We didn’t explore much. We ran into the other two, and then decided to get some frozen yogurt.” Woohyun explains.

 

“Where are they, anyway?” Hoya asks, clicking the home button on his phone to light up the screen to check the time. “We should be boarding soon.”

 

“I’m sure they’ll be on time. No way Sungjongie will miss the flight back home; he’s been complaining about missing Hongdae shopping for days.” Sunggyu jokes. “What about you guys?”

 

“We’ve just been resting; me and Myungsoo-yah could use it. We drank way more than all of you. I had Hoya grab us some snacks so we could get a bit of energy before the flight. That’s pretty much it.” Dongwoo responds with a shrug of his shoulders.

 

“Oh, and Myungsoo’s funny now.” Hoya chimes in, grinning in my direction. Woohyun and Sunggyu give each other a weird look before laughing together.

 

“Whatever you say. Anyways I figure I’d give you guys your boarding passes now since we’ll be leaving soon.” Sunggyu reaches into his bag, pulling out the tickets. “We’ll be sitting 2, 2, and 3. I’ll keep Sungyeol and Sungjong together, and I’ll sit with Hoya and Dongwoo.”

 

“Yah, why are we being supervised?” Hoya crosses his arms, narrowing his eyes at the leader.

 

“Because I _know_ better than to leave you two to your own devices during an international flight. Don’t think that Dongwoo didn’t tell me about your aspirations to join the mile high club.” Sunggyu says dryly, handing them their tickets with no remorse.

 

Hoya looks at Dongwoo accusingly, who flushes under his attention. “How could you betray me like that? Now he’ll always be monitoring us.” He turned his gaze to Woohyun menacingly. “Yah, why don’t you keep him busy and satisfied so he can leave us alone?”

 

Woohyun smacks him on the head, smiling down at him triumphantly. “Because it’s almost just as satisfying to see you get frustrated. Plus, I want to sit with Myungsoo. That’s okay with you, right?”

 

I sigh, nodding my head obediently. The rest of the guys fall into chatter, Woohyun and Hoya picking on each other while Dongwoo and Sunggyu laugh.

 

Before long Sungyeol and Sungjong show up, more than a couple shopping bags in hand and happy looks on their faces. Sunggyu hands them their tickets, and Sungjong immediately starts pulling pieces out, showing off his new purchases to the hyungs.

 

I try to let myself fade into the background, but Woohyun’s hand on my shoulder is a constant reminder that I’m not forgotten. “Save some cookies for me, yeah?” I nod, standing up when I hear the voice on the intercom initiate the boarding. Even if Woohyun is laughing and joking with the others, I can feel his eyes consistently stray to me.

 

I let him lead us to our seats, a sense of dread starting to build within me at the prospect of being stuck in close proximity with him; I know he is going to try to force me to talk about Sungyeol again.

 

Woohyun lets me sit on the inside and I gaze out the window wistfully to observe our last fleeting images of America; this is going to be one long flight home.

 

* * *

A/N: next chapter Woohyun is going to force some sense into Myungsoo, even if he has to sit on top of him the whole flight!  



	18. sharing

_I stared at him from across the room, practically molding myself to the wall in an effort to get away from him. Sunggyu was already tempting enough on any given day; those lustful gazes from the beautiful brown eyes, the overly pouty pink lips and the even pinker tongue… it was a daily struggle keeping myself in check in front of my leader._

 

_I had made up my mind that this couldn’t happen. Even if I had wanted to claim him from the first moment we had met, I told myself that we couldn’t… that it was too big of a risk for the group. We had the other members to think about, our music, our success… neither of us could handle the idea of ruining Infinite over a bad break up._

 

_Well, more like I couldn’t handle the idea. The thing about Sunggyu that I both loved and hated was his determination. When he truly cared about something he couldn’t hide his passion for it; it was part of what made him such a great performer, the thing that made his singing so believable. But those things that were so valuable on stage where quite detrimental off of it, when I could feel his desire for me almost suffocating me each time we were in a room together. Sunggyu wanted me, had told me so from the beginning, and he no intention of hiding his feelings for me._

 

_Which would have been okay if I could talk myself into accepting his feelings, if I could make myself forget about all the responsibilities we had and all the reasons we couldn’t be together._

 

_Maybe it would have been easier if we could just get the tension out of our system, give into the lust and move on. But we both knew that if we let it get to that level, if we connected and felt each other in a physical way, that there would be no chance of us ever stopping._

 

_And that wasn’t even taking the bonding into account._

 

_I had heard about it my entire life, about that instinct, the feeling of wanting to own someone completely, in every sense of the word. As an alpha I was used to other people throwing themselves at me, it was normal for them to feel the need to submit to me, to do whatever I wanted due to their instinct to please me._

 

_But Sunggyu was different._

 

_I had never met a beta like him, or a beta that acted the way he did around me. He didn’t give into me the way others did, he didn’t feel the need to gain my approval. He challenged me, he pushed me, and he made me fall for him._

 

_Which is why I knew that I could never really let him get close, couldn’t let him know the depths of my affection for him. Because if Sunggyu did know he wouldn’t ever stop trying to make me claim him, and if I ever slept with him I wouldn’t be able to resist marking him as my own._

 

_Which is why this current situation was so out of control. Somewhere along the course of the night I had lost the sense of security that I was so used to having, and Sunggyu had pushed me over the edge._

 

_“Why are you doing this?” I asked him, eyeing the door that was unnervingly close to Sunggyu._

 

_“You know why.” His voice was entirely too deep, much too tempting._

 

_“Did you send the other members away? Was this some sort of plan?”_

 

_“Even if it was, it had to be done.” I dragged my eyes away from him, away from the pants straining against his thighs, the loose white v-neck that showed off his perfectly shaped chest. I stared resolutely at the floor, anywhere but the smooth expanses of skin that I definitely could not touch, no matter how badly Sunggyu wanted me to._

 

_“Woohyun-ah.”_

 

_“Don’t.”_

 

_“You’re not getting out of this room Woohyun-ah. In order to make it out of that door you’ll have to get past me. And we both know that I’m not letting you go. I need you.”_

 

_“This isn’t you talking. It’s just the heat, you just need to wait it out and it will pass and everything can go back to normal-”_

 

_“You know that isn’t true. This isn’t about the heat, this is about us. You know that I’ve always wanted you. Just like we both know that you’ve always wanted me. And quite frankly, I can’t wait any longer. The only person that can help me is you.”_

 

_“Hyung, I just-”_

 

_“Help me, Woohyun-ah.” Sunggyu crawled on top of my bed, his eyes glued to my face and his voice husky. “Please.”_   
  


_There was nowhere for me to go and he looked so good where he was, on top of my bed and calling out my name. I could have him underneath my sheets in mere seconds, naked and panting while I kissed him in all those places I had only dreamed about._

 

_“There’s no one else Woohyun-ah. Just you. You’re the one that I think about, the one who makes me feel so hot. I’m already so hard for you… I’m going crazy with you being so close but not touching me-”_

 

_“I- I can’t.”_

 

_“You can; anywhere you want. I know that you think about touching me, I know that you’re thinking about it right now. You can’t hide from me Woohyun-ah. You can’t fight this, us, anymore. These games we’ve been playing, they’re over now. I’m tired of staying still until you decide to respond to your instincts. It’s not just your body that wants me; it’s your heart, your soul. You want me to be yours, you want to claim me, mark me so that everyone will know that you’re the one who takes me every single night.”_

 

_I tried my best to sound firm, but my voice was already wavering as I watched him slightly rock his thighs together, trying his best to relieve a bit of the pressure between his legs. “Sunggyu.”_

 

_“You will take me from now on Woohyun-ah, you’ll take care of me and fulfill my needs in every single way that I desire. And in return, I’ll give you my everything, I’ll please you in ways that you’ve never even dared to imagine. But right now, I’m tired of waiting for you to initiate something. So I’m telling you to stop fighting the inevitable.”_

 

_Sunggyu moved from the bed to stand in front of me, the slight difference in height feeling overwhelming in this moment. It was almost as if time was moving in slow motion as he pulled the shirt over his head, revealing that creamy chest to my desperate eyes. I was hypnotized as I watched the pretty hands get rid of the rest of his clothing, showing off all the things I was never lucky enough to see. The scent of his arousal was heavy in the air, his heat making it even more empowering, pulling at something deep within me in a way I had never felt before._

 

_“You can feel it, can’t you? Our bond is already forming.”_

 

_He was right, his hands gripping at my biceps with bruising strength. “Sunggyu.., this is-”_

 

_“Exactly what needs to happen. This is our destiny Woohyun-ah and it feels so-” Sunggyu pressed up against me, letting me feel his hard cock and he moaned as he whispered out the last word against my open mouth. “Right.”_

 

_The moment his lips touched my own I knew I was done for; he was everything I had never dared to want and he tasted so good, his tongue instantly pushing into my mouth to deepen the kiss. The moment he touched me any and all composure he seemed to have left him, his movements becoming messy and desperate. Sunggyu’s nails dug into my shoulders with the strength of his grip, his thighs brushing against my jeans as he tried to straddle me against the wall._

 

_I didn’t know if it was the lust, Sunggyu’s heat, or the years of pent up sexual frustration between us but our movements were frenzied and distressed. Sunggyu was practically rutting against me, begging for me to hurry up, whispering the dirtiest kinds of things in my ear._

 

_“I want you to fuck me. I want your cock deep inside of me Woohyun-ah, I want to be sore for days-”_

 

_“Fuck… Sunggyu.”_

 

_“Come on, come on I’m ready.” Sunggyu managed to push down my jeans, exposing my cock to the air, the friction on my length already driving my crazy. “Woohyun-ah, put it inside of me. Fuck me open with your big, hard cock-”_

 

A little gasp escapes my mouth, and I rest my phone on my leg, fighting the blush on my cheeks as I took a quick break from reading. Sometimes a pause was necessary when reading more… _adventurous_ types of plotlines. I was a little skeptical when I first noticed this particular story; my research had brought up a few abnormal topics when I looked into the werewolf trope. But there were quite a few upvotes and it was an author that I had recognized, so I had downloaded it in the airport just in case I got bored on the plane. And now I was definitely patting myself on the back for this decision, this was getting kind of hot in an over the top yet still undeniably satisfying sort of way. It was somewhat thrilling to imagine Sunggyu speaking such dirty words to me so desperately. Some of the things our fans came up with were absolutely _shameless,_ and yet I couldn’t stop myself from reading them, even if I did have the “real thing” these days as Hoya liked to put it.

 

But I didn’t think it was necessarily appropriate for me to continue reading such subject material, especially considering my current surroundings. I reluctantly close the application, even though an embarrassingly big part of me was dying to know just what kind of “bond” would be formed between the two of “us” in the story.

 

I look down at the mop of messy black hair below me, courtesy of Myungsoo’s head resting on my shoulder. He had fallen asleep almost immediately after take off, his head dropping to rest on my shoulder as soon as the plane had moved past the turbulence of take off.

 

In a way I pity him, I know _he_ must know exactly what I have planned for our flight. I saw the anxiousness in his eyes as we were boarding, and I knew he was dreading our conversation. I feel bad for making him feel uncomfortable, but I knew it had to be done. It wouldn’t do for him to be depressed once we got back home, with our comeback preparations starting as soon as we were settled, Myungsoo needs to be on the top of his game.

 

But more important than that, I care about Myungsoo, and the thing that would break my heart the most would be to see him withdraw from the rest of us. Sunggyu was right; I knew exactly the kind of pain that Myungsoo was going through, and I would be ashamed of myself if I sat back and did nothing to help him.

 

I sigh, looking out the plane window at the cloudy sky; why did love always have to be so complicated? Why couldn’t we just confess how we really felt, without all the insecurity and self-loathing? If I could, I would make this easy for Myungsoo; I would take away his doubts and replace them with confidence.

 

What Sunggyu had said was correct; Myungsoo and Sungyeol did have a special sort of relationship, and it wouldn’t be too much of a stretch to consider them a couple. Myungsoo had the patience and the desire to take care of Sungyeol, he had always been the one who gravitated towards him and liked to spend his time with him. Sungyeol wasn’t the closed off type per say, but he definitely wasn’t the person who liked to wear his heart on his sleeve. I knew that being an idol was hard on him, that there were times when he seriously considered if it was all worth it. I understood why he felt so much pressure, it hurt my heart that he was the person that so many of our antis decided to target their frustrations on. It didn’t help that Sungyeol was the type to be overly critical of his appearance, his voice, his dancing, his _everything._

 

But somehow, all of that seemed to disappear when he was around Myungsoo. He became happier, _brighter,_ and Myungsoo just had this way of making Sungyeol feel like he was worth it. That type of bond wasn’t something that Sungyeol had with the other members, it was special and I knew that if Myungsoo could get over his fear and explain that to Sungyeol, he could have a real chance of proving his feelings.

 

He didn’t seem to be waking up anytime soon though, and my phone was calling out my name. My eyes dart to his sleeping face, and I decide to hell with it; I open back up the fic to start where I had left off. It was only a few short minutes later when beta Sunggyu found a very interesting way to utilize his alpha’s tongue that a peep of distress escaped me, the feelings making me lose my composure for a quick second.

 

I felt the head shift on my shoulder, and bleary dark eyes look up at me. Myungsoo rubs them cutely, subconsciously trying to straighten himself out after the impromptu nap. “Sorry… I didn’t mean to-”

 

I hurriedly close out the window, doing my best to look innocent. “No, you’re fine! It’s totally okay Myungsoo.”

 

The visual scratches his head, peeking at me from under his bangs. “I didn’t think I’d fall asleep like that… how long have we been flying?”

 

“It doesn’t matter, as long as you feel more rested. If you want to sleep some more, I’ll sacrifice my shoulder for you; it’s kind of boney, but apparently it makes a good pillow.” I try to joke with him and thankfully his face cracks just a bit to reveal a small smile.

 

“No… I think I’m good. I don’t really feel tired anymore.” He folded one of his legs, dropping his arms to play with the edge of his jeans. “So what have the other guys been doing?”

 

“Well _I_ have been stuck in the same spot for hours, unable to move since a certain visual practically passed out on top of me… thanks for asking.”

 

“Sorry hyung! I really didn’t mean to inconvenience you.” Myungsoo looks guilty and I laugh at his slightly panicked expression.

 

“Yah, I’m just messing with you. Seriously, I didn’t mind. You feel asleep almost right after take off, so I’ve just been…” I search my brain for a reasonable answer, “playing games on my phone!”

 

“I thought you didn’t really like cell phone games…”

 

My thumb slides over my screen until I find something more believable to explain how I spent the time. “And I’ve been… working on some lyrics. Yeah, for a new song. You know… all this inspiration with the trip and all.” Thankfully this was somewhat true, I had come up with a couple of things that I could show him just in case he was feeling curious.

 

“Something for all of us?”

 

I shake my head, tapping my phone on my thigh. “No, I think it will probably be a solo. The mood is more fitting for a ballad.”

 

“Will you share it with me?” Myungsoo looks hopeful at the prospect. “You’re really talented at these types of things hyung. I really liked Beautiful last time, I’m sure I’ll like this one too…”

 

“It’s more of a sad song this time Myungsoo.”

 

“That’s okay hyung. I’d still like to hear it.” Myungsoo says honestly.

 

I open up the note on phone, scrolling through the tiny words. “I don’t have an arrangement or any of the composition figured out yet, but I think I will use this part for the first verse; _Where are you and what are you doing? You haven’t forgotten me, have you? What if the smallest memories disappear from me? Will this fearful heart ever reach you?_ ”

 

I turn to him, noticing his saddened expression. “Is it really that bad? Maybe I should just delete the whole thing altogether and start over?”

 

“No… it’s good hyung. The words sound like they came from your heart.” His finger taps on my screen, scrolling through the rest of the lyrics I had written. “This line has the most impact.”

 

“Which one?”

 

“ _My heart endlessly grows smaller as I can only watch you from afar._ ” Myungsoo read aloud, his voice slightly trembling. “It’s sad hyung, but it’s beautiful. I’m sure many of our fans will connect to it. Everyone has fallen in love with someone they can’t have at least once. You should sing it softly, the words will have a big enough impact on their own.”

 

I know just how deeply the words impact him, considering the current situation. I try to brighten the atmosphere a bit. “Sometimes it’s easier to express myself through music. It’s a healthy outlet, a good way to relieve my stress and make my thoughts feel less burdened. What helps you relieve stress Myungsoo?”

 

“I’m not as good at music as you… but it helps me too. I like listening to our albums, hearing our old songs and reliving our memories together… thinking about where we were and how far we’ve come. It makes me feel proud.”

 

“That’s good. I feel proud of us too.”

 

“And photography! I like improving and making my pictures better. I can see the difference from when I first started… it makes me happy.”

 

“Did you take any good pictures during our trip?”

 

“Of course! There was lots of interesting stuff in LA, not only the landmarks but people too. The ocean was really pretty. And in Vegas-” He stops, a curious expression coming across his face.

 

“And in Vegas?” I prompt him. He looks unsure, but I prompt him to continue. “Come on, you can tell me. We’re going to be stuck on this plane for quite awhile, so I definitely have time to listen.”

 

The younger nods, taking a breath before starting. “Well, there was- this one night it was just me and Sungyeol. We didn’t do anything that cool, considering our surroundings. We didn’t even buy anything or really explore the Strip, we just played around in the hotel, took all these dumb pictures together. Our hotel was so big that by the time we were done it was already dark. So we went outside to watch the light show at the fountains, and it was just as pretty as I remembered it. At first I was taking pictures of the water and the lights, but eventually my focus became Sungyeol. He just looked so… happy. Like he didn’t have a care in the world. He was more beautiful than the light show. My camera ran out of space and for the last picture of the night... that was when he let me kiss him… when he kissed me.”

 

Myungsoo sighs, resting his cheek on his knee to face away from me. He murmurs something into his jeans, something my ears can’t discern. I stroke my fingers through his hair, trying to be gentle. “I can’t understand you when you’re mumbling.”

 

The visual turns to me with a pout, still unable to look directly at me. “I asked you how long you liked Sunggyu hyung… before you two got together.”

 

“A… long time. In a way, probably since I’ve met him. I always kind of knew there was something different between us, but it took me awhile to realize just how _special_ , you know?”

 

The younger boy nodded, his expression still downcast. “You’re really lucky.”

 

“Lucky?”

 

“Yeah. What you have with Sunggyu hyung… it just seems so easy.”

 

I laugh, the sound startling him a bit. “Easy? You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

 

“But you like him and he likes you back… what’s difficult about that?”

 

“Myungsoo… I wouldn’t use the word easy to describe my relationship with Sunggyu…. Maybe not ever.”

 

“But you’re happy…”

 

“Of course I am. And he’s happy with me too. But it wasn’t always like that.” I admit somewhat sadly.

 

Myungsoo looks clearly confused as he ponders my words. “But you guys never fight… ever since Sunggyu hyung told us about your relationship the two of you have been in such a good place. I can tell, just by looking at you. You guys _are_ lucky.”

 

“I’m not saying that we aren’t; trust me, sometimes when I wake up in the morning and I see Sunggyu smiling next to me… it feels like I’ve won the lottery, like I really am the luckiest person in the world. I’m just saying that nothing worth keeping comes without a price, without hard work. It was the same way with us; it wasn’t always good, in fact in the beginning, it was kind of hell.”

 

“But why?”

 

“Because I did exactly what you are doing right now.” The words are serious, and Myungsoo bristles in his seat.

 

“But I haven’t done anything…”

 

“And that is exactly my point.”

 

“Hyung-“

 

“Do you want to know the truth, Myungsoo? Because me and Sunggyu… it wasn’t exactly a fairytale; but life never really is.”

 

“Only if you want to tell me hyung.”

 

“It’s not exactly fun for me to think back on those times, but I will tell you because I want to help you Myungsoo. Seeing you act like this, pulling away from everyone and trying to hide your true feelings, it hurts me Myungsoo. It hurts me because I know how destructive it can be, and I know how much it isn’t helping your situation.”

 

“But I don’t know what else to do…” Myungsoo says sadly, his eyes closing.

 

I pat him on the back, trying to soothe him. “I know that Myungsoo. I know that it’s scary and overwhelming, and I definitely know that it’s too much for you to deal with on your own. You have people that care about you; people that would do anything to make you happy, to make you smile.”

 

“He doesn’t like me back hyung; how am I just supposed to carry on and pretend like everything is okay when he doesn’t return my feelings? He’s my best friend and I care about him so much and I _miss_ him but I don’t know how to be around him anymore. I feel like I’m losing everything with Sungyeol; like I’m losing my best friend and my chance at ever being with him, of being more important, all at once. And I know you care about me hyung, but it’s not the same. I’m really thankful to you, that you’re trying so hard to make me feel better but how is that supposed to make up for everything else? I know this seems irrational since I never even dated Sungyeol, but it still feels like I got my heart broken. Every time I see him laugh and smile with someone else, it feels like my heart is breaking all over again.”

 

“But it doesn’t have to.” Myungsoo opens his mouth to argue but I raise a hand to stop him. “Just hear me out.” He nods, his eyes still looking a bit skeptical. “Sunggyu actually rejected me at first.”

 

“What?” Myungsoo couldn’t hold back his surprise, his eyes as round as saucers.

 

“Yeah. In the beginning, when I was trying to figure out just how deep my feelings went for him, I was confused. I mean, Sunggyu was my best friend, someone I looked up to, and I knew I loved him. But was I _in_ love with him? Did I want to be with him forever? It was hard to figure out; I couldn’t exactly approach him about it, so I spent so much time on my own, just wondering what if; what if Sunggyu likes me back, what if he’ll hate me if he knew I wanted to kiss him, what if, what if, what if. I played out so many scenarios in my head that it started to drive me crazy. Hoya tried to knock some sense into me, in some questionable ways to say the least; but he did get the point across that I’d never figure out my feelings for Sunggyu if I didn’t make a move.”

 

“And when you did, he rejected you? He didn’t like you then?” Myungsoo says in disbelief, his mouth still hanging open.

 

A small laugh escapes me. “Not exactly. Looking back on it, I know what I should have done. I should have been honest with him, I should have approached him like an adult and told him how I really felt.”

 

“So what did you do instead?”

 

I scoff, thinking back to that fateful party and the horrible aftermath. “I let my impulses and too much champagne control my actions and I made some really stupid decisions. Sunggyu misunderstood my intentions, and because of that, our friendship feel apart. For _months._ ”

 

“I had no idea… I’m sorry hyung.”

 

A bitter smile comes across my face at the memory. “Oh, it’s okay. Well, now it is. But back then, I won’t deny that it was hard. Once I sobered up I didn’t explain myself, and neither did Sunggyu. We were both hurting and we both let assumptions guide our actions. Sure we played nice for things concerning the group, we both knew how to be professional, but personally we didn’t spend any time together. I closed myself off from him, I felt like you feel; I didn’t know how to act around Sunggyu. Thankfully Hoya and Dongwoo were aware of my feelings so they did their best to keep me company and make me feel better, but they weren’t Sunggyu.”

 

I pause, trying to think of the easiest way to make Myungsoo understand. “In a way, what you’re thinking is right. It doesn’t matter if all of us spend time with you and talk to you and do our best to make you feel better, because we aren’t Sungyeol. The only person that can make you feel right and normal again is Sungyeol. I’m saying this as someone who isn’t trying to judge you or put you down, but there’s a reason that he affects you so much; if he really means that much to you, then you need to stop avoiding him. Do you know where avoiding Sunggyu got me back then? Nowhere. It just made me more depressed, lonely, _scared._ I did things Myungsoo; terrible, unhealthy things all because I was sure that the person I loved didn’t feel the same. Do you know how much I hurt, how much pain I could have avoided if I would have just been honest with Sunggyu? With myself?”

 

I took a deep breath, trying to gather my emotions. “The point, Myungsoo, is that we could sit here together. We could come up with a million different scenarios of what Sungyeol could possibly feel for you. We could come up with what ifs, what if he hates you, what if he loves you, whatever. But we’ll really never know for sure because we aren’t Sungyeol. The only way you can know how Sungyeol feels is if you talk to him. Please Myungsoo, just _talk to your best friend.”_

 

“But I’m scared-”

 

“How is this any better?” I cut him off, my voice a little harsh. “Seriously, how is this any better? How is you feeling alone and rejected any better than knowing the truth?”

 

“I… I guess it isn’t.”

 

“I don’t want you to hurt like I did; I don’t want you to feel sad when it could be avoided. I want to save you from that kind of suffering, please be stronger than I was.”

 

Myungsoo bites his lip, shrugging his shoulders. “But I don’t know if I can be hyung.”

 

“You _can_ Myungsoo. Honestly I think that if you could just be brave for a little while, just long enough to tell Sungyeol how you really feel, that it will all be worth it. Seriously Myungsoo, you’re a catch. You care about him so much, you could be the best thing that could ever happen to him.”

 

“But what if he doesn’t agree? What if I go all out, tell him how I feel only to have him turn me down?”

 

“Do you love him?” Myungsoo opens his mouth to respond but I speak up again. “No, do you _really_ love him? Even if that means you aren’t the one for him?”

 

Myungsoo looks down at his shoes, nodding his head slowly. “Yeah… I really think I do. Even when we talked the other night, when he didn’t say he wanted me… I wasn’t angry at _him._ I don’t think I could ever really be; I just want him to be happy. I wish that he could be happy with me but if there’s someone else… I would congratulate him. I would never want him to be alone. Not ever.”

 

“You wouldn’t ever want him to feel the way you feel right now.” I sum up for him, and Myungsoo nods silently. “Then just tell him that Myungsoo. Don’t hold back, be honest with him about how the depth of your feelings. If you speak to him from the heart, then he’ll hear what you are saying.”

 

“But what if it’s not enough? What if _I’m_ not enough? There’s no guarantee that he’ll want to give me a chance.” Myungsoo states matter of factly.

 

“You’re right. There is a possibility that Sungyeol will turn you down. _But-_ ” I smile, trying to reassure him. “If Sungyeol is your best friend, that means that he loves you, at least in a platonic sense. And if he really does love you and consider you to be the person that he’s closest to, then he wouldn’t let your feelings get in the way of your friendship. He wouldn’t leave you or refuse to talk to you because of your confession. If you guys have a real connection, then your bond will be too strong for something like unrequited feelings to break. The way I see it, there’s only two real options here.”

 

“And that would be?” Myungsoo asks, his voice sounding a bit nervous.

 

“Sungyeol could turn you down, but he’d still be your best friend. You’d work through it, I’m not saying that it would be easy for you, but eventually you would get over your feelings and you’d move on. But Sungyeol would still be there for you as your friend.”

 

“And the other option?” I laugh, knowing that he’s hoping for a silver lining.

 

“The other option is simple; you get everything you want. You get Sungyeol as your best friend and you get Sungyeol as… well, _more_.”

 

“More, huh.”

 

My laugh is louder this time as I give him a half hug. “Trust me, more if good. More is _great._ If you have a chance for more, you go for more.”

 

His deep laughter finally joins in with mine, and I see a bit of optimism in his eyes. “I don’t think I’ve ever had more. It would be nice to share that feeling with Sungyeol for the first time.”

 

I smile at him, my hand touching his cheek to comfort him. “Don’t live with regrets Myungsoo. Do you know how stupid I feel when I look back on the choices I made? When I think about how much time I lost feeling sorry for myself, when I could have spent it making memories with Sunggyu? Don’t make those mistakes I made. Be better than I was and go for the guy that you want, instead of sitting back and letting your life pass you by. Because the only way that you’ll lose him for sure, is if you sit back and do nothing.”

 

“I know hyung. Everything you’re saying makes sense, it really does.”

 

“Of course it does.” I say cockily, earning another chuckle from the younger. “But if it does go bad, if you don’t get the answer that you want from Sungyeol, you won’t have to suffer alone. You’ll have me, and I _promise_ that I’ll be there for you; a shoulder to cry on, someone to scream at, anything. I’ll be here for you. And so will the others; it took Dongwoo all of two minutes to pick up on something being wrong.”

 

Myungsoo finally smiles at the thought of the rapper’s kindness. “I know; how does Dongwoo hyung always just _know_ when the members are feeling sad?”

 

I shrug my shoulders. “I don’t know, it’s like he’s got some sort of empathetic superpowers. Well, I guess he’d have to have them in order to put up with Hoya’s attitude all the time, right?” Myungsoo laughs a bit too loudly at the joke at the dancer’s expense, covering his mouth to try to quiet down.

 

“But seriously, no matter how bad you feel, Dongwoo can always put a smile on your face. And you know he’s always down for cuddling if you’re feeling lonely and you need to feel some closeness. All you’d have to do is ask and he’d be your koala.”

 

“I know that, I just don’t want to impose-”

 

“You’re _never_ imposing. You’re our dongsaeng; we love you. We want to help you and take care of you. But honestly, I don’t think that you’ll have a reason to be sad if you confess. I think Sungyeol might just surprise you. Not that I want to give you false hope or anything, I’ve never spoken to him about you in that kind of context. But let’s just say I wouldn’t be surprised in the slightest if Sungyeol returned your feelings. Either way, it would be better to know for sure, right?”

 

“Right. Like you said, I could be sad for nothing, and if it doesn’t turn out the way I want, at least I could stop wondering about the possibility of us being together. I should talk to him, I don’t want to feel nervous around him anymore. Either way I still need to be his best friend; and hopefully, if I’m lucky, maybe some more.”

 

I hold out my pinky, and he does the same. I link our fingers together, happy that I can finally see him smiling again. “I promise I’ll be cheering for you; here’s to more.”

 

“Here’s to more.” Myungsoo repeats after me, before hugging me quickly in what I’m sure is a thank you. When we let go of each other he settles back in his seat, the smile still on his face. He seems to remember something, before reaching down to pull something out of his bag. “You’re the best hyung! I guess after the lecture you gave me, you deserve something sweet right?”

 

I grin at the prospect, clapping happily to encourage him to hurry up when I spot the treats in his hand. He laughs as he opens them up, popping one in his mouth before offering a couple to me. “Yeah, I’m starving after having to knock some sense into you. I totally deserve _all_ the cookies.”

 

“I do too!” My head snaps up at the voice, Myungsoo almost dropping the bag at the sudden appearance of his crush.

 

“Sungyeol! How long have you been standing there?” I ask a bit nervously.

 

“I just got here silly. And _you_.” He narrows his eyes at the visual. “You have been a bad boy. I thought double chocolate chunk was our thing Myungcookie?”

 

“Myungcookie? Do I even want to know-”

 

“It’s nothing.” Myungsoo stammers, his voice sounding a bit alarmed as he tries to explain to the tallest boy staring down at him. “It is our thing, Dongwoo hyung made Hoya hyung buy them for me, and I was just feeling a bit hungry and Woohyun hyung was sitting next to me-”

 

Sungyeol giggles, reaching down to fluff Myungsoo’s hair. “I’m just messing around with you Myungcookie. You can share with Woohyun hyung if you want! As long as a certain someone doesn’t get any ideas…”

 

I raise my hands in defense. “I wouldn’t dream of it Sungyeol.”

 

“Good! I’ve got my eye on you; first you steal him away during our celebration last night, then you hog him on the plane ride, and now you’re eating up all his cookies. You’re lucky that me and Sungjong are working on editing some particularly interesting blackmail footage of your boyfriend’s drunken antics, otherwise I might be offended.”

 

“Possessive much?” Myungsoo chokes at my words, secretly my thigh in a clear warning, but I ignore him.

 

“Not really; I know where Myungsoo’s loyalties lie.” Sungyeol leans down to snatch up a cookie, tossing the whole thing in his mouth and munching down on it. He makes a sound of approval at the taste, swallowing it down happily. “I just so happened to notice some delicious cookies on my walk to the bathroom, and now that I’ve had my fill, I’ll be on my way.” He smirks victoriously, practically strutting down the aisle away from us.

 

I can’t stop the chuckle from escaping my mouth; if I wasn’t sure before, I _definitely_ was now. These two were almost too much; Myungsoo a clear basket case and Sungyeol staking his claim at the possibility of a threat… they were totally into each other but clearly unsure of how to go about it. “Myungsoo, I wouldn’t worry too much if I were you-” I stop mid sentence, watching as he unbuckles his seatbelt. “Wait, what are you doing?”

 

“I’m going to go talk to Sungyeol.” He says, a clear look of determination in his eyes.

 

“What? Right _now?_ ”

 

“Like you said hyung; I’ll only regret it if I waste any more time.”

 

I laugh at him using my own words against me, watching in disbelief as he makes his way out of our row. “I know what I said, I just didn’t realize you would take it so literally.”

 

Myungsoo stops in the aisle, his smile lighting up his entire face.

 

“What can I say hyung? I think it’s time that I got more.” He turns to walk away before retracing his footsteps to end up back at my side. “Actually hyung, would you mind switching seats with Sungyeol? No matter which way it goes; we need to work through it, and the only way we can do that is if we’re together.”

 

“You’ll be _fine_ and of course I will.” I pull him into a hug, patting him on the back for handling this in a much more mature way then I was capable of. “I’m proud of you Myungsoo; just remember to breathe and try not to cry; crying isn’t very sexy.”

 

He laughs, squeezing back tightly. “Okay, I’ll try my best hyung!” He lets go of the embrace, walking down the aisle with a bit of pep in his step. He looks back over his shoulder at me for reassurance, and I lift my fist up and smile.

 

“Fighting!” Myungsoo repeats it back, before setting himself on the path to find out the truth of Sungyeol’s feelings for him. A few moments later Sunggyu plops down next to me, the simple squeeze of his hand having to suffice for the kiss that I know he wishes he could give.

 

“So what was that about?” He asks, motioning over his shoulder in the direction Myungsoo had disappeared in.

 

“Oh nothing; I’m just pretty sure that I convinced Myungsoo to confess to Sungyeol.”

 

“Seriously? What is it with this group and feelings and bathrooms?” I laugh, pushing him lightly for his words. “What? It’s true; there are much more romantic locations for confessions.”

 

“True; but so far, bathroom confrontations have eventually led to happiness. Let’s just hope that it doesn’t take them nearly as long as it took us to actually get to the confessions part.”

 

Sunggyu wraps his fingers with mine in the seat, his eye smile prominent as he grins at me. “I have faith in them; we figured it out so I think they can too.”

 

I tighten my grip on his hand, trying to bite back my smile. I had a feeling that Sunggyu would be right.

* * *

A/N: shamelessly included random werewolf woogyu just so i could find a way to include more woogyu in the update i'm trash  



	19. confessing

I stand outside the restroom, my hands shaking at my sides as I wait for the door to open up. I didn’t really have a plan on what to say to Sungyeol or what to do once I saw him, I could barely think really but I am here. That is a huge step in the right direction, no matter how scary it may have felt.

 

There is no way to predict his reaction; Sungyeol is… Sungyeol. Being unpredictable was one of the things that made him special and so exciting to be around. But if there was ever a time I wish I could completely anticipate Sungyeol’s behavior, it was right now.

 

I thought about Woohyun’s words seriously, and there is no denying how close me and Sungyeol are. But being close doesn’t necessarily mean that he wants to actually be with me. I know he wants a real chance at love, but I honestly can’t predict whether he would give it a try with me.

 

Deep down I wished that our roles could be reversed; that Sungyeol could be the one confessing to me. Then I could be caught off guard byhis words, I could be the one to ease his worries, to let him know that I’ve always been waiting for him to notice me.

 

I didn’t understand how quickly my feelings had turned into something this intense; maybe it was the fact that the other members were settling down and finding happiness, and deep down that was what I want more than anything.

 

My hands start to get clammy and the longer I stand waiting, the more anxious I become. I’m too logical of a person to be naive about this; rejection is a very real, very hurtful possibility of the outcome of this conversation. But my words to Woohyun were true, even if Sungyeol was the person that I wanted the most, I wouldn’t hold it against him if he didn’t feel the same. It would hurt like hell, and I’m not really sure if I’m capable of completely getting over someone like him, but I would try to if that’s what he wanted.

 

But I was special to Sungyeol; I was his best friend and as long as I could be his special something, then I wouldn’t complain. I just hope that I can find a way to show him… to make him believe how much I really do care for him.

 

It feels like the door opens too soon and yet not soon enough, my heart picking up as the nerves come back in full force at the sight of my best friend.

 

“Myungie? What are you-”

 

“Go back in!” My voice cracks a bit as my hand pushes at his chest, and I squeeze into the small space with him. He gives me a weird look as I close the door behind us, his hands perched on his hips.

 

“Did you really have to pee that bad? You could’ve let me leave first, I know we’re close Myungie but I gotta draw the line somewhere.”

 

“No, this has nothing to do with pee.” I try to correct him, and his eyes get comically bigger.

 

“Well I’m definitely not staying if you need to do the other thing…”

 

“No, just- stop talking about that stuff! It really doesn’t have anything to do with that, just let me explain and stop talking about anything involving a toilet.”

 

“We are standing in a bathroom Myungie, just saying.”

 

“I know, but only cause I need to tell you something. Important.”

 

Sungyeol suddenly looks a bit more serious, crossing his arms over his chest. “Is everything okay?”

 

“Yeah…”

 

“Myungsoo.” Sungyeol uses his stern voice, narrowing his eyes at me.

 

“I promise Yeollie. I just wanted to speak to you alone, and this is kind of the only option right now. It’s not exactly the most romantic setting, but it will have to do.”

 

“Romantic?” He chuckles, shifting his weight around on his legs. “Why would we need someplace romantic just to talk?”

 

When I look into his eyes he honestly looks confused, and it makes my strength waver. What if I was wrong, what if he really can’t see me as anything other than a friend? What if I’m being too selfish, what if in my greed to have him like me back I end up losing him completely?

 

“Myungie…” Sungyeol says softly, his hand squeezing my shoulder. “Are you sure you’re okay? You got all quiet, you look sad…” He suddenly wraps me up in a hug, his hands smoothing down my back. “Just talk to me, I hate thinking of you bottling it up inside. I promise I’ll listen, to whatever you have to say. You’re my best friend Myungie, I’m here for you, you have to know that.”

 

“I know you’re my best friend… That’s… the problem Yeollie. I don’t want you to be anymore.”

 

Sungyeol’s arms drop instantly, his voice sounding scared when he backs up to look in my eyes. “...What?”

 

“Yeollie, I- God, I’m probably doing this all wrong. I wish I could just know what to say, how to tell you-”

 

“Myungsoo, you can’t leave me.” Sungyeol reaches for my hand, tightening his grip desperately. “You can’t.”

 

“No, I’m not, Yeollie I’m not going anywhere.” I try to reassure him, which only seems to confuse him more.

 

“Then… why don’t you want to be my best friend anymore? Was it something I did?”

 

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong-”

 

“Was it because I kissed you on the cheek?” He looks down on the ground, his foot kicking restlessly at the floor. “Myungie, I’m sorry. I thought… we were just having fun, right? I won’t do it again if it makes you uncomfortable-”

 

“It didn’t. Yeollie, that’s the problem.”

 

“I don’t understand…”

 

I sigh, frustrated with myself for not being able to put how I feel into words. “I’m so bad at this… sharing how I feel. Usually you just know what I’m thinking without me having to say anything… I guess that what makes us get along so well. But I know you don’t know this time because I’ve purposely been hiding what I feel from you… I didn’t want you to know because I was afraid of how you would respond.”

 

“Just tell me. Please. We can work through anything together, I know we can.”

 

I nod, working up the courage to look into his eyes. “There’s probably a better way to do this but… I’m afraid that if I don’t tell you now that I’ll never be strong enough to. And I want to be strong for you Yeollie… I want to be everything that you need.”

 

“You are Myungie; you’ve always taken care of me. I don’t know if I would’ve gotten this far without you. Seriously, you have to know how much you mean to me.”

 

“I think I do… I’m just not sure if it’s in the way that I want. Sungyeol… it’s hard to talk about this because I barely even understand it myself… when it comes to you and our friendship… it’s always been important, one of the things I cherished the most. At first it was the closeness, the companionship, the escape from the craziness that is our lives that I needed. But with time… I started to realize that it was just you. You’re the thing I wanted. Each and every day I think about you; I wonder how you’re feeling, how you’re doing. It’s like… somewhere along the way of our friendship, you became the priority. Things didn’t feel right unless I knew for sure that you were happy.”

 

“That’s not a bad thing… especially if it goes both ways.”

 

“I’m not sure if it does Yeollie. Cause the way that I think about you, the way I want you… it’s not the way a friend does. It’s… more.” I shrug my shoulders, unable to think of a more eloquent way to say it. “It’s strange because… it’s like I didn’t even realize what my feelings meant, how deep they were until we were talking that night… about falling in love. I had always thought you were beautiful because you are, and I always wrote off those butterflies I felt when you touched me as just a crush. But then I listened to the way you spoke about… well, sex and intimacy and how you wanted it to be with someone you really loved and… I guess I just realized that I wanted the same things too, but I wanted them with you. But then you said you hadn’t met that person yet-”

 

“Myungsoo-”

 

“Please let me finish cause I’m not sure I can work up the courage to ever put myself out there like this again. I know you weren’t thinking of me when you said that but… I want you to consider it. I want you to think of how well we work together, how much we understand and care for one another. We could be more Yeollie… we could be great. That night you kissed me on the cheek, it was perfect. You make my heart beat faster… you make me want things I never dared to dream of. It’s you, Yeollie, it will always be you. Please just… give me a chance to convince you, give me a chance to make you fall in love with me too. I promise you won’t regret it, I promise that I’ll treat you right, I’ll do everything I can to make you happy. Please just consider… me.”

 

“Are you saying… what I think you’re saying?”

 

I nod, biting my lip nervously, but it was now or never. “I’ve fallen for you Sungyeol. I want you to be my everything, I want to be the one who makes you feel all those things you said you wanted. I want to make your days special, I want to make your nights unforgettable. I just want… you.”

 

“I… I don’t know what to say. This feels- I can’t believe this is happening.”

 

I felt my confidence start to shatter, my heart clenching in my chest. Maybe I was wrong, maybe this wasn’t what he wanted. “I’m- it’s… you know what, I shouldn’t have done this. It wasn’t fair of me to spring this on you. I- I won’t bring it up anymore. I’ll keep my feelings to myself, I don’t expect anything from you, I should’ve never expected anything, why would you want me, I’m so stupid-”

 

Sungyeol cut off my nervous rambling, with his lips, his hands grabbing the front of my shirt and pulling me in close. I was too shocked to respond, my brain short circuiting at the fact that Lee Sungyeol was kissing me. He leaned back just an inch, his lips still hovering dangerously close.

 

“You really are stupid, for thinking that I would ever reject for even a second.” His mouth spread into that blinding gummy smile, his eyes crinkling in his happiness. “And for the record, this would be a lot more fun if you kissed me back.”

 

“You mean… you actually-”

 

“Yeah.” Sungyeol giggles, moving his hands up to hold onto the back of my neck. “Hell yeah. That night I was trying to send you a signal, when I said I wanted to meet that person. In retrospect that might not have been the best wording but… I thought the kiss on the cheek was obvious enough! You’re not the brightest when it comes to these types of things Myungie… but that’s just what makes you so lovable.”

 

“You mean… you really like me?” I repeat, my mind still not comprehending his closeness and the lingering touches.

 

Sungyeol laughs louder, shaking his head. “I just kissed you again Myungie, and you’re still asking me that?”

 

“I know, I just- you like me back?” I ask again, wanting to be completely sure. Sungyeol nods, smiling even wider if that’s possible.

 

“I’ve been crazy about you for practically ever… I just figured that you were out of my league-”

 

“Are you kidding? Yeollie, you’re gorgeous, I don’t deserve you-”

 

“Myungie, we can’t argue over who’s the prettiest.” He bit his lip, shyly looking up at me. “But the fact that you want to is pretty cute.” His big brown eyes are shining so bright, his excitement making him bounce on his heels. “So… you wanna make out or…”

 

“Yeollie!” I blush, covering my mouth with my hand sheepishly. “We should talk more! We need to figure out things-”

 

“What’s there to figure out?” Sungyeol asked, wrapping his arms around my neck, bringing our chests flush together. “You like me and I like you. We both want something serious, and we both want this to work out long term. Am I right so far?”

 

“...Yes.”

 

“Then it’s settled. I’m yours and you’re mine. You are officially taken Kim Myungsoo.” Sungyeol chirps, sounding pleased with himself.

 

“So… this means you’re my boyfriend? For real?”

 

Sungyeol licks his lips, nodding his head. “Yup!’ He says with a pop. “So now we get to do all the fun things that boyfriends get to do.”  
  


“Like kissing?”

 

He laughs loudly, before leaning in to nuzzle his nose in my cheek. “Yes, kissing would very much be appreciated.”

 

“Good. Cause I would like to do that. Very much so.” I ramble out, starting to get hypnotized by Sungyeol’s scent and his warmth.

 

“Then do it already.” Sungyeol whispers, and I immediately lean in. This time I’m anything but passive, my tongue insistently pushing at his lips. His mouth opens up with an excited groan, his body pushing me back into the wall. It’s more than a little cramped and the soap dispenser sticking into my back isn’t exactly comfortable, but I wouldn’t stop kissing him for anything.

 

Eventually we do pull apart, because the need for air eventually becomes greater than the need to kiss Sungyeol, but my lips instantly find new places to kiss and touch; the long line of his neck, the curve of his jaw, the base of his throat. He sounds so hot, little moans escaping now and then, his fingers pulling tightly on my hair as I explore.

 

I map my way back to his mouth, smiling into the kiss at the knowledge that my worrying was all for nothing; Sungyeol had fallen just as hard for me as I had fallen for him.

 

Time seems to stop, nothing more important than tasting the sweetness of his mouth. I’m pretty sure I would’ve kept kissing him forever, if it hadn’t been for the knock on the door. We reluctantly pull away from each other, straightening our clothes and hair with red cheeks. I had gotten so caught up in the moment that the fact that we were occupying the only bathroom in first class had temporarily escaped me.

 

Woohyun is on the other side of the door when we open it, a knowing look in his eye. “So it seems like Sungyeol is going to be taking my seat for the rest of the flight?”

 

Sungyeol giggles, taking off to claim his new space with a grin. Woohyun looks at me warmly, wrapping an arm around my shoulder as follows me down the aisle. “So somebody was worried for nothing? I knew it! You should have talked to this love doctor sooner!”

 

I didn’t even care about him teasing me, my mind too preoccupied with Sungyeol to feel anything but happy. I looked up ahead, seeing him leaning over the edge of the aisle with bright smile, eager for me to join him. It felt strange and exciting, knowing that my boyfriend was waiting for me; I hoped that that feeling would never go away.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“They look so… happy. It’s kind of gross.”

 

I smack Hoya on the shoulder, rolling my eyes. “It’s cute. They’re cute. Just look at them!”

 

Hoya made a funny face, shrinking back in his seat. “I am. It’s almost like a train wreck… I’m horrified but I can’t look away.”

 

I sigh at his dramatics, shaking my head. “You’re so ridiculous, they’re adorable.”

 

“I don’t know… I have to agree with Hoya hyung. Seeing them act all lovey dovey is kind of disturbing. Oh god, I have to share a room with them when we get back home, my poor innocent mind is at stake. Nowhere is safe in the dorm anymore, I live with a bunch of perverts-”

 

“Yah, Lee Sungjong don’t talk about your hyungs that way!” I chastise him, but Sungjong doesn’t seem care.

 

“He’s right.” Hoya agrees, nodding his head. “Maybe I should buy the maknae some earplugs for his birthday this year. And a blindfold for that matter. Hear no evil, see no evil.”

 

“It’s not funny! I hate you all.” Sungjong pouts, flipping open his magazine haughtily.

 

I hug the younger boy, my hand ruffling his freshly cut hair. “You love us, you love your hyungs, don’t you?”

 

“Stop, you’re messing up my hair!” Sungjong whines, trying to shrink away from my grabby hands, attempting to swat me off with his magazine. Hoya’s gaze was still fixed on the two across the aisle from us, his mind puzzled.

 

“I don’t get it; when did they even become a thing?”

 

Sungjong, successfully having escaped from my clutches, threw a judgemental look in Hoya’s direction. “Seriously hyung? They’ve only been obsessed with each other since our trainee days. Sungyeol hyung and Myungsoo hyung were bound to happen, maybe if you paid attention to something besides Dongwoo’s ass, you would have noticed.”

 

“Hey. Hoaegi likes me for more than my ass! That’s not even his favorite body part.”

 

Hoya smirks at Sungjong. “It’s true. How could anyone deny the allure of that mouth?” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, making Sungjong gag.

 

“Yah! I don’t want to think about Dongwoo hyung like that! Ah, my poor brain doesn’t need these images!” Sungjong frowns, rubbing his eyes. “Ugh, I’m going to have nightmares now, so much for getting some sleep on the plane. You hyungs are the worst.” He grumbles, putting in his headphones and resolutely turning away to stare out the window, clearly done with talking to us for the rest of the flight. I send Hoya a glare, who manages to look sheepish.

  
“What?”

 

“You don’t have to mess with him, Hoaegi. He is still pure; well… as pure as someone can be after hanging out with us for so long.” I blink, my face becoming thoughtful. “Wow, I’ve never really thought about it but the maknae’s innocence is kind of the biggest victim in all of this...”

 

“Are you kidding?” Hoya scoffs, crossing his arms across his chest. “He spent the first three hours of this plane ride with Sungyeol, maliciously editing drunk video footage of our leader, to be used at the most opportune moment in the future. That kid knows exactly what he’s doing!”

 

“Well, in his defense, Sunggyu’s renditions were pretty accurate… when did he find time to learn so many girl group dances? I knew he liked Girl’s Day, but I didn’t realize that he was just secretly waiting for a chance to show off his moves.”

 

“Remind me to bring that up the next time we go on Weekly Idol. That’s probably the only place we could get away with teasing him to that level on a public broadcast, and that suspenders move is definitely something the world needs to see.”

 

“You like his covers that much? You told me that I was the best at girl dances… well, behind Sungjong of course.”

 

“Don’t be bitter that I picked him for Infinite S, it was just for a joke. You know that you’re really the one who I think is the sexiest out of all of us. You should know that I’m considering getting a pole for our room, I know you’ve been dying to try out that After School choreo.”

 

“Don’t tease me unless you plan on following through; you know I’d put on a show for you in a second.”

 

“Maybe you can remind me when we get back to the dorms, yeah?” My face flushes as his hand slides into my seat, his thumb caressing my thigh.”I can’t wait to get you back in our room and-” He yelped, pulling his hand away. “Ouch! Why?”

 

Sunggyu loomed over from the seat in front of us, his gaze hardened and his arm still raised from slapping Hoya’s hand. “Sungjongie gave me an SOS, kicking the back of my seat and claiming you guys were scarring him for life, and the fact that you guys didn’t notice just proves his point. There are other people on this plane, do try to control yourselves or I’ll make Dongwoo switch seats with Woohyun.”

 

“But hyung, I want to sit with you! Don’t make me sit with Hoya and Sungjong, together they’re evil, they’ll torture me the whole flight-”

 

“Hush, Woohyun.” Sunggyu quieted his boyfriend down before turning back to glare at us. “Just because you’re sitting behind me doesn’t mean I don’t know what you’re up to Hoya; I’ve got my eyes on you. Dongwoo, please don’t encourage him, you know he has a one track mind.”

 

“Hey, I take offense to that.”

 

“Whatever Hoya, just be good for the rest of the flight, for Sungjongie’s sake.”

 

“I personally don’t think it’s fair that you and Woohyun’s inability to experiment and take risks has now started to hinder my sexual freedom. You shouldn’t force us to be boring just because you are.”

 

“We’re just getting started, we’re allowed to be boring!” Woohyun turned to Sunggyu, a pout on his face. “Did you tell them I’m boring? I can be more exciting! Let’s go to the bathroom and I’ll prove it to you right now-”

 

“All of you be quiet!” Sungjong sighed, rubbing his temples. “God, sitting with the lovebirds would be better than dealing with all of you idiots! You’re supposed to be the older, more responsible hyungs, I swear I’m more mature than all six of you combined.” Sungjong huffs, giving us all a very exasperated look before dramatically flipping his magazine back open, signifying the end of the conversation.

 

Sunggyu and Woohyun shrunk down in their seats in front of us, embarrassed after being reprimanded by the maknae. I lightly smack Hoya in the shoulder, who merely rolls his eyes at the little outburst.

 

“I still say that Sunggyu’s jealous.”

 

“Howon.”

 

“Fine… I’ll be good. But only because I know you’ll make it up to me later.” His mouth pulls into a devilish grin, leaning in close to brush his lips against my ear. “And just because we can’t touch… doesn’t mean we can’t talk.”

 

I bite my lip, crossing my legs and trying to smooth my face into a mask of indifference as Hoya whispers his dirty ideas on how to celebrate our arrival once we got alone.

 

 

* * *

 

 

A sense of happiness sparks within me the moment I step into Incheon, the feeling of being back home just seeming right. Even though it was nice to spend time overseas, there was no place quite like Korea.

 

But I was still humbled by the trip, just knowing that we had fans in another country that supported us, and the fact that our company trusted in our success enough to invest so much money into our new concept, made me feel accomplished; like Infinite was really taking big steps to reach that next level. But looking back on it, I was sure that the advancements in my personal life with Sunggyu would far outweigh the excitement I felt from shooting the music video or the photobook.

 

The whole past week felt like some kind of weirdly perfect dream, each new day with Sunggyu bringing me a new moment to cherish. I felt so happy, happier than I had probably felt ever, just because I was standing by his side. The smile on my face was real as I walked through the airport, waving and throwing hearts, feeling like giving a little bit more than the normal amount of attention to the fans waiting for our return today.

 

“Someone’s excited to be home.” Sunggyu murmurs in my ear, his eyes hidden behind his shades as we wait for our luggage.

 

“I am. Things are good. Life is great. You are perfect.” Sunggyu turns away, lifting up his hand to his face to try to stop his blush.

 

“Yah, quit sweet talking me. You already did enough of that on the plane.”

 

“But I like sweet talking you… and I’m pretty sure you like it too, don’t you hyung?” I tease him, brushing my fingers on the underside of his wrist. Sunggyu purses his lips together, still stubbornly looking away but after a few seconds, he nods. “Was that a yes baby? I need to hear you say it.”

 

“Not here.” Sunggyu complains, lightly pushing my chest.

 

“Why not?” I smirk, bouncing on my heels. “I like it when you get shy in public, it’s cute.”

 

“Leave me alone.” Sunggyu whines, his lower lip sticking out comically.

 

“I can’t; you’re acting too cute for me to walk away.”

 

“That’s debatable; I don’t think I’d use cute to describe that face…”

 

“Go away Hoya.” I demand, but he ignores me anyway. Dongwoo stands next to him, happily playing with a stuffed animal that a fan had given him; he was definitely easily amused. “You totally ruined our moment…” I complain, but Sunggyu has already used the rappers’ entrance to his benefit, stepping away to escape my teasing during my moment of distraction.

 

“Where are the others?” He asked out loud, standing up on his tiptoes to try to peer around the airport.

 

Hoya spoke up first, pointing to the far end of the terminal. “Well the maknae is putting on a show for his fansites, as usual.” I spot him easily, shaking my head as I watched him twirl and pose for his legion of adoring fans. And people acted like I was the greasiest one at airports… Sungjong took flirting with the camera to a whole new level.

 

“Can you get go get him? I need to talk to everyone together.”

 

“Yes, leader-nim.” Hoya says cheekily, grinning when Sunggyu threateningly balled up his fist.

 

“And where’s our lovely new couple?” Sunggyu grumbles, running a hand through his hair nervously. “It might not have been the best decision to leave them unsupervised…”

 

“They’re fine! I saw them go into one of the shops, you know how Myungsoo likes to buy his wine after we’re done travelling.” Dongwoo suddenly makes a face. “Ugh… wine.”

 

I laugh, patting him on the back sympathetically. “Just the thought of alcohol makes you look like that?”

 

“Yeah… it might be best if I never do shots again.”

 

“I’ll make that boyfriend of yours pay.” Sunggyu threatens, wrapping an arm around Dongwoo’s neck. “He’s no longer allowed to make you drinks, he probably just wanted to get you really drunk so he could do dirty things to you.” Sunggyu visibly shivers at the thought.

 

“Don’t be silly Gyu Gee Gee; you know Hoya doesn’t have to get me drunk to do anything to me.” He winks at Sunggyu, who audibly gags at the implication.

 

“Please don’t spoil my appetite… I want to stuff myself with Korean food as soon as possible, and if you keep talking like that I’ll surely get sick.”

 

I shook my head, used to this kind of bickering between them. I spot Sungyeol and Myungsoo walking in our direction, practically glued together. “I found our lovebirds…”

 

Sunggyu let go of Dongwoo, turning around to find them with his own eyes. He sighs, rubbing his forehead. “I swear this group is going to give me gray hairs.” He waits for the two of them to get within hearing distance, his voice already coming across exasperated. “I know you guys are excited about recent developments… but do you even know the definition of the word subtlety?”

 

Myungsoo barely turned his head from where it was buried in the back of Sungyeol’s neck, his arms tightly wound around his waist. His lips pulled into a pleased smile, his dimples prominent as he snuggled into the warmth of Sungyeol’s back, obviously making no moves to separate from his new boyfriend.

 

“Friends… hold each other like that.” Dongwoo tries to help them, but Sunggyu rolls his eyes.

 

“Friends do not sniff each other. Quit being such a creeper.” Sunggyu’s words didn’t seem to phase Myungsoo, he simply smiled wider. Sungyeol was strangely quiet, having seemingly accepted his new part in this with poised grace, his fingers resting in his pockets and his grin hidden behind his mask.

 

“Why are we acting like Myungsoo being creepy is news?” Hoya chimes in, having reappeared with Sungjong in tow.

 

“And Myungsoo has been sniffing Sungyeol for years now… he’s like a little puppy following around his master, the only thing missing is a leash and collar.” Sungjong agrees, high fiving Hoya for finishing their joined attack smoothly.

 

“Hey, my Myungie is not like a puppy! Everybody knows he looks like a kitten. A cute fluffy kitten, especially when he smiles.” He patted Myungsoo’s hand, partly in a comforting gesture and partly to keep it from wandering lower down to his belt, who hummed happily at the praise and the touch.

 

“Regardless of when it started, you guys need to tone it down. Some distance would be much appreciated, at least until we get into the van. I can’t even tell where Sungyeol ends and where Myungsoo begins.”

 

“Um, if Sungyeol and Myungsoo get touching privileges in vehicles, then I vote me and Dongwoo get ours reinstated.” Hoya interjects somewhat bitterly.

 

“How about hell no.” Sunggyu dismisses the idea immediately, making Hoya bristle.

 

“Yah, why are you being like this? In our defense, everyone on the tour bus was asleep and I had figured out a way to keep Dongwoo quiet, it’s not my fault that you just so happened to wake up to use the bathroom right when he was about to c-”

 

“Stop right there. We will not revisit the events of that night.”

 

“Hey, wait a minute, I remember that! During the Japanese tour, right? Sunggyu couldn’t stop blushing around you two for weeks, oh my god.” I couldn’t help but laugh, even though my boyfriend didn’t look so amused. “I mean, um. Listen to our leader! Everyone keep their hands to themselves and be good.” I narrow my eyes at them before turning to Sunggyu with a thumbs up. “See, I can be supportive Gyu.” I wink in his direction, and he starts mumbling about what wrongs he must have committed in his past life to deserve being stuck in a group of horny idiots.

 

“Okay, let’s not go down this road… Gyu Gee Gee, you said you had something you wanted to talk to us about?” Dongwoo tries to change the subject, squeezing Hoya’s shoulder to keep him quiet when he looks like he wants to argue.

 

Sunggyu sighs again, looking like he’s aged at least ten years in the past ten minutes. “I wanted to talk to you guys about tonight… we’re going to have a meeting, we have some serious things to discuss about the direction the group is going, but I’d prefer to have it once we’ve all had a little time to eat and nap off some of the jet lag. So nobody go too far, right now it’s about noon, so we can meet up around ten? That should be plenty of time for everyone to get settled.”

  
Everyone mumbles out their agreement, it’s not like we often left the dorms or wandered off on our own as it was. The managers reappear with all of our luggage in tow, spouting off the usual instructions that we know by heart now; don’t stay in one spot for too long, don’t get separated from the group, make sure to be friendly and courteous, safety above fanservice, etc, etc.

 

“Everyone ready?” Sunggyu double checks like the good leader he is, making eye contact with each of the members before giving the managers the signal to start heading towards the exit. “Myungsoo, if you refuse to move your face away from Sungyeol’s back, then I’m not taking responsibility for your well being.”

 

“It’s okay hyung, I’ll take care of him.” Sungyeol looks back over his shoulder at Myungsoo. “I’ll protect you Myungie, don’t worry.”

 

It would’ve been sickeningly cute if Sunggyu wasn’t so busy reprimanding them.

 

“Just leave them be. They’re excited.” I say, slightly touching Sunggyu’s back as he watches the two of them walk, more like hobble with the awkward way they’re connected to each other, in front of us.

 

“If only they could be excited behind closed doors, I wouldn’t have such a headache.”

  
“Come on, you know that they’re adorable. They’re all bright and shiny and new.”

 

“They’re not toys, Woohyun.”

 

“They look like dolls though! They’ll make such pretty children.”

 

“...I’m not even going to go there with you.” Sunggyu shakes his head, taking a gift from a fan and bowing slightly as we move along.

 

“There’s no reason to be jealous baby, you know our kids will be my favorites.”

 

Sunggyu stumbles for a moment, losing his composure. “Kids?”

 

“Don’t play coy with me now Gyu; I already know you want my babies.” I walk away laughing, leaving him perplexed behind me.

 

“Hope you’ve been wrapping it up hyung.” Hoya says with a nervous quirk of his eyebrows, before following in my footsteps.

 

“What… that’s not even possible…” Sunggyu pouts, dragging his suitcase behind himself dejectedly. “Why didn’t I just go solo… why did I get stuck with crazy people who obviously didn’t pay attention during biology class…”

 

Dongwoo wraps an arm around Sunggyu’s shoulder, comforting him on the way out of the airport, accepting fan gifts and smiling big enough for the both of them.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Wanna go practice?” Dongwoo scoffs at my suggestion, collapsing on the bed next to me.

 

“I barely had enough energy to unpack and shower, the last thing I want to do is go practice.” He turns over on his side, facing towards me. “We’ve barely been back and you’re already feeling this restless?”

 

“I don’t know.” I lean back slightly, making room for him to curl into my chest. “I just want to go promote right now, especially now that the music video is finished. Being back home… I want to show everyone what we’ve accomplished. I can’t believe we’ll have to wait all summer…”

 

“It won’t be so bad.” Dongwoo says hopefully. “We’ll have things to keep us busy. The full length album is coming out soon, so we’ll do the Japanese promotions to go along with it. The events are always fun there, you like the high touches.”

 

“Not as much as the low touches on the bus afterwards…”

 

“Stop.” Dongwoo chuckles, hitting my chest playfully. “Seriously, I think Gyu hyung is suffering from post traumatic stress.”

 

“Please, I saw his face when he caught us. You have no idea how sexy you look when you’re being pleasured… he most likely got hard and unfortunately for him, back then he didn’t have Woohyun to take care of it for him. Otherwise, he’d probably be thanking us for the show.”

 

“Not everyone is as kinky as we are Hoya.” Dongwoo smiles, his finger softly pulling at my lips. I bite down on the tip of it, making him squeal.

 

“They should be.” Dongwoo chuckles at my honesty, nodding in agreement.

 

“They have no idea what they’re missing out on, do they?” He still has it in him to blush, wrapping his leg around mine playfully.

 

“And it’s going to stay that way cause you’re all mine.” I don’t even bother to hide the possessive streak within me, my hands traveling down to back to settle on his ass. “I’m the only one who gets to touch you like this.”

 

“As long as I can say the same.” Dongwoo teases back, tilting his chin up for a kiss. There’s a pleased look in his eyes when he leans back, his teeth biting down on his lower lip.

 

“What?”

 

“Nothing, you’re just-” He shrugs, getting shy and hiding in my chest again. “I just like you.”

 

“Just like?” I let my nose graze across his cheek as my fingers slip underneath the bottom of his shirt to tickle his skin. “I can’t even get some love now?”

 

“You get my love.” Dongwoo corrects me, his lips pressing into the base of my throat. “You get my everything.”

 

“Good.” I roll over to my back, pulling his smaller frame on top of me with ease. He adjusts quickly, his hands slipping between the mattress and my back to hug me tightly. Dongwoo rests his face in the pillow, a lazy sigh escaping his lips.

 

I’m still a bit keyed up, the energy making me need to focus on something, and Dongwoo’s body is my favorite kind of distraction. I slide the shirt up his ribcage, exposing his back to my eager hands. I draw shapes and letters across his skin absentmindedly, just enjoying the hypnotizing feel that is his soft skin and hard muscle.

 

“Someone can’t stay still.” He remarks, teasing but not annoyed. I can tell he enjoys the touches, his voice getting a bit deeper as I lull him into a sense of relaxation.

 

“What do you expect when I have you on top of me?” The words are cheeky but I mean them; it’s almost impossible for me to be this close to Dongwoo without feeling the need to touch and explore.

 

“I’m not complaining.” He mumbles, moving closer to rest his chin on my shoulder. “I just don’t want to force you to stay. If you’d rather go practice or workout to get rid of the extra energy, I’ll understand.”

 

“I can think of a much more satisfying way to get rid of my energy, and I wouldn’t even have to leave this bed.”

 

Dongwoo picks up on my suggestion instantly, a tired laugh coming from on top of me. “Why do you do this to me?” He shakes his head, snuggling into the pillow. “I’m hungover and jet lagged and sex is the last thing on my brain right now. After so many days of going nonstop between schedules, I just want to be lazy.”

 

I reach down between us, my hand cupping his half hard erection, my words and fleeting touches enough to get him interested in the prospect. “This is telling me a different story baby.”

 

“That’s because I am easily influenced and you know it.” He pouts at his predicament, and yet his hips still move down into my hand, creating a nice friction on his length.

 

“I never said we had to have sex.” I remind him, my hand still teasing him through the fabric of his jeans. “You could just lie there… let me take care of you. Let me make you feel good.” I move my other hand into the back of his pants, sliding underneath the waistband of his underwear to lightly tease his entrance with my finger. I drag my lips up his neck, my mouth right at his ear. “Let me make you come.” I whisper, just barely pressing the tip inside of him.

 

“Fuck.” Dongwoo breathes out, his hands grabbing at my sides.

 

“Tell me yes. That you want it.”

 

His back arches, chasing my touch. “I want it.”

 

Those three words are all it takes to get me moving, my desire already peaked. “So easily convinced.” I tease him, and he doesn’t bother to deny it. I pull off his shirt while he’s still on top of me, the both of us grinning as I maneuver him to the bed on his back. I grab onto the sides of his jeans, tugging them down over his ass in one big motion. Dongwoo giggles, kicking his legs free with a carefree smile.

 

I push my fingers into his thick hair, pulling him up for a deep kiss. He moans into it, his bare legs brushing up against me as we make out. I end up following his mouth each time he pulls away to catch his breath, unable to let go of the addictive feel of his lips. Dongwoo laughs again, resting his head back on the pillow, gazing up at me with those wild eyes.

 

“I thought you weren’t going to make me do any of the work.”

 

I shift back on my heels, letting my eyes run over his body. My fingers let go of his hair, gliding down his chest to his stomach, stopping right above where he wanted. “I won’t.” A little plan comes into my mind and I smirk down at him. “But since you don’t want this-” I guide Dongwoo’s hand to the front of my jeans, letting him feel how hard I am for him. “You’re going to have to choose.”

 

Dongwoo bites his lip, a low whine escaping him. “But you said I get to have all of you.”

 

“And you do, most days. But right now, we’ve only got so much time left before our little group meeting and I suggest you make the most of it.” I lean down, moving my lips across his cheek. “So what will it be? My mouth or my fingers?” Dongwoo groans, looking completely put out. I laugh, moving my thumb in circles above his groin. “I promise you’ll enjoy whichever one you pick.”

 

“You’re evil.” Dongwoo complains, his body moving restlessly. He gives me his best pleading stare, his eyes all wide and desperate, but I keep my control. “Fine. But only if I get to choose where.” I nod, the deal seeming fair.

 

He relents, pulling my hand up to his mouth. “Your fingers.” Dongwoo whispers, slipping them between his lips. My eyes drag down to his mouth, mesmerized by the sight of my fingers disappearing in and out of those full lips. They were so soft and the inside of his mouth was so hot, his tongue curling around and pushing between my fingers as he held my gaze. His eyes had gotten darker with his excitement, his pupils wide blown as he softly rolled his hips up to meet mine.

 

“So you want me to drag this out? Make it last?” He nods, his teeth slightly scraping against the tips of my fingers when he almost pulls all the way off, before sinking down again. I’m pleased by his choice, even though I do thoroughly enjoy going down on him, it always got him worked up quickly, and he wouldn’t be able to hold off his orgasm. With my fingers I could tease him, draw out his pleasure, make him beg for me.

 

“Where do you want them?” I ask the question even though I already know the answer, just because I want to hear him say it. I love when his voice sounds like this, breathless and desperate, just for me.

 

“Inside of me.” He answers without hesitation, pulling my hand away from his mouth with a loud pop. “Come on.” He urges, grabbing onto my wrist and pushing my hand down.

 

“Now who’s the restless one?” I tease, scooting closer to him, the back of his thighs resting on top of my own. Dongwoo doesn’t bother to respond, his knees dropping closer to the bed, opening himself up for me. “You want it like this?” I rest my weight on my arm next to his head, bringing our faces closer together.

 

“Wanna see you. Wanna feel you, Fuck Hoya, come on.”

 

“I thought you wanted me to go easy on you? You said you were tired, that you wanted to be lazy, so I thought I should go slow.”

 

“Quit using my words against me.” He drops his head back, his hands traveling down his own stomach to grab his own length.

 

“Nuh-uh.” I stop him, catching both of his wrists in one hand, before moving them up above his head. “I told you that you don’t have to do anything.”

 

“Well if you don’t do something I’m going to go crazy.” His arms tense up, testing the strength of my hold before relaxing. “Hoya please.”

 

“I haven’t even started and I got you begging.”

 

“Hoya.”

 

“Okay.” I press my fingers at his entrance, lightly stroking just on the outside. He jumps at the slightly cool touch, before stilling his hips. “Only because you asked so nicely.” Dongwoo squints his eyes at me, his mouth opening up to reply back, but I choose that moment to slip the first finger in. His protest turns into a moan, his eyes closing as I push it all the way in. I love the way he just accepts it, accepts me, his body adjusting to let me do whatever I please. “Just relax.” I whisper, keeping my movements precise and slow. I know he could take more, know that more is probably what he wants, but I enjoy keeping things like this, slowly building him up to his climax, making him fall apart with each flick of my wrist.

 

“Hoya, I-”

 

“Relax.” I repeat, rubbing my thumb on the underside of his bound wrist. “Close your eyes and just enjoy it.”

 

Dongwoo hums, following my instructions as his body went limp on the mattress. I traced my mouth over the hard line of his collarbones, sucking just long enough to make him squirm but moving away before leaving a mark, always mindful of keeping up appearances.

 

I loved the way he followed my lead, his hips moving ever so softly to accommodate me, keeping up with my pace on instinct, without changing or challenging it. I slipped in another finger, the pleased grunt falling from his mouth spurring me on. I let his wrists go, knowing that he was under my spell now and that there was no reason to pin him down. His arms instantly wrapped around my neck, his fingers tugging on my hair when I started to scissor the digits inside of him.

 

I reached down to grab his thigh, bringing his leg all the way up to rest his calf on my shoulder, making him split open his legs. Luckily he was limber, his body moving exactly where I wanted it to without much resistance. I knew the new position was letting me reach deeper inside of him, one of his hands falling down to cover his lips, trying to quiet his moans.

 

I brushed the hand away, finding a much better way to keep him quiet, pulling him into a kiss. He was happy for the distraction, his tongue pushing past my lips in seconds to get a deeper taste. My fingers hadn’t stopped moving, still stroking him steadily, the tightness around my fingers making me wish it was somewhere else. But I was so focused on him, on the way his teeth pulled at my lips and the way his leg twitched on my shoulder with each press in of my fingers, that ignoring my own desires was easy, the erection in my jeans forgotten in the face of his pleasure.

 

Two fingers turn into three, his nails digging into my back as I stretch him open. He takes it so beautifully, the heat of his skin going up, his body rolling harder as he tries to get me in as far as I can go. I don’t even know how long we move together like that. Sharing hot kisses and even hotter touches, my eyes drinking up the sight of him writhing underneath me. Something about the fact that he’s completely naked, every inch of him on display while I’m fully clothed turns me on more, makes me want to completely own him, memorize every sound that he makes in response to my touch.

 

My fingers curl inside of him, pressing against that spot and he shakes, his hands dropping to the mattress to fist the sheets.

 

“Hoya, Hoya, Hoya.” He chants, his eyes opening up to look at me pleadingly. “Please, I need it baby, please.”

 

“You want to come? Just from this?” I know he can, he has plenty of times before, but it still turns me on to know that I can bring him so much pleasure with a simple touch of my hand.

 

“I can. Please, right there, right there, fuck.” He rambles, his hands pulling at the sheets as his body twists. “Hoya.”

 

“You look so fucking good.” I grab his ankle, pushing it all the way back towards his head, loving how easily he bends to my touch. “So fucking good, grinding down on my fingers like that. You’re so sexy, so fucking perfect and you’re all mine. You want me to make you come?”

 

“Yes, please I’m so close. I want to Hoya.” I pull up with my fingers, applying continuous pressure exactly where he wanted it. I could tell the exact moment he tumbled over the edge his mouth dropping open in what I knew would’ve been a scream if I hadn’t acted so quickly to cover it with a kiss, knowing that the other guys were still wandering around the dorm. It was so hot, feeling his body spasm around me, the aftershocks of his orgasm making him tremble.

 

We laid there together for a few minutes, Dongwoo panting as I smiled down at him. When he finally had control over himself again he moved his other leg up, wrapping his ankles around the back of my neck, not letting me move away to clean him up. I let my weight bend him in half, leaning down to steal another kiss.

 

“If lazy feels that good, we should do it more often.”

 

“I should do you more often.” I say cheekily, biting at his lips. He giggles, reaching down to grab at my hardness with twinkling eyes.

 

“How does right now sound?” He whispers, his fingers playing with the button of my jeans.

 

“With the way you look right now, you could make me do anything.” I admit, the healthy glow of his skin and the red flush on his cheeks making me want everything.

 

“That’s what I like to hear.” Dongwoo flirts back, his hand tugging down my zipper. “How about we start with me?”

 

Before I could respond I heard the sound of the door opening, Woohyun’s voice ringing through the room.

 

“Hey guys, are you- oh my god. Ah, sorry!” He turned away, blushing furiously. “It’s time for our meeting and Sunggyu asked me to come get you guys-” He snuck a peek through his fingers back at us.

 

“Don’t look!” Dongwoo shrieks, trying his best to hide beneath me. Thankfully I was still covered, otherwise Woohyun would’ve gotten quite the view of my bare ass.

 

“Sorry! It’s just… I knew you were flexible Dongwoo but damn.”

 

“Woohyun, get out!” I yell over my shoulder, sending him scrambling out the door with a bang. Dongwoo’s body was curled up underneath me, his head buried in my chest.

 

“Oh god… that’s so embarrassing.”

 

“Don’t worry… I blocked his view of everything. Well, except your ankles.”

 

Dongwoo cringes, bringing his legs down immediately. “So much for round two.” He pushes me off of his body, climbing out of bed sluggishly to reach for a towel and retrieve his clothes.

 

I curse Woohyun and Sunggyu to hell for ruining the mood and my plans, watching Dongwoo redress with disappointed eyes. “Hey… I didn’t even get a round one!”

 

Dongwoo, his face still red, wraps himself up in his jacket, shoving his hands into his pockets. “I’m going to go wait in the living room… yeah…” He mumbles, clearly embarrassed, keeping a safe distance between us as he exits the room.

 

I drop my head back on the pillow, a frustrated sigh escaping my lips, the erection in my pants uncomfortable, and clearly going to be left untaken care of. “Damn vocal line, ruining everything.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

I sprint back to Sunggyu’s room, closing the door behind me for safety, just in case Hoya decides he wants to pursue me and get some revenge for ruining the mood. Sunggyu gives me a weird look, taking in my frazzled appearance.

 

“What’s going on? I thought you were going to meet me in the living room after rounding up the rest of the guys?”

 

“I was… I just… need a little moment.”

 

“Woohyun.” Sunggyu says sternly, crossing his arms as he walks up to me. “What did you do?”

 

“I didn’t do anything!” My voice comes across defensive, and Sunggyu gives me a knowing look.

 

“Woohyun.”

 

“I… might have walked in on something I shouldn’t have when I went to retrieve the rappers…”

 

“Please tell me you were smart enough to knock on their door before entering.” I look at him sheepishly and he sighs, covering his eyes with his hand. “It is never a good idea to enter their bedroom without knocking first.”

 

“I didn’t hear any noise when I walked up so I thought it was safe! They must be like ninjas, how does Hoya do it? You’re so loud when I’m doing stuff to you, everybody always knows.”

 

“What?” Sunggyu squawked out, his cheeks coloring.

 

“Oh. Maybe I shouldn’t have told you that. Oops.”

 

Sunggyu shook his head, already feeling another headache coming on. “Just- we’ll come back to that. Later. What did you see?”

 

“Thankfully Hoya was clothed and he was covering the more explicit parts of Dongwoo… not that I would’ve minded cause I mean it’s Dongwoo and he is kinda naked alot, but I think it’s kind of different when you see someone naked in that context, you know? Hey, maybe you should try out yoga with Dongwoo, that position looked kinda nice-”

 

“Stop. Stop right there.” Sunggyu smacked me on the head, narrowing his eyes at me. “I refuse to let you get any ideas from those two, so just get those out of your head right now. And I need the guys’ attention to be on what I’m talking about, not what you saw in that bedroom so when we do go out there you will apologize and not let Hoya bait you into any fights.”

 

“But I don’t wanna.”

 

“Woohyun.”

 

“Ugh, fine. The things you make me do for love.”

 

“Play nice with Hoya so I can have my meeting or we won’t be playing nice afterwards. Got it?” Sunggyu breezes past me, his threat hanging in the air.

 

I trail after him, tugging on his sleeve. “Hey wait a minute, I agreed, didn’t I? We still get to christen our bedroom later, right? Gyu? Gyu!”

* * *

A/N: Sunggyu tries to act like he doesn't like Woohyun's greasiness, but he does!  
  
I just like it when Woohyun makes Sunggyu all flustered and happy and cute *~*  
And when he eventually gives in and does what his bae wants.  



	20. dreaming

After getting shut down in the bedroom, I could only hope temporarily, I followed Sunggyu out into the main area. I sat down at the dining room table, just fiddling with my phone as I watched him make some preparations for our impromptu meeting.

 

I listened as he ordered obscene amounts of fried chicken, a smile coming across my face as I watched him seriously debate between sauce flavors and seasonings, before ultimately deciding to get a little bit of everything. After ending the call he moved over to the fridge, pulling out a bottle of wine along with some sodas.

 

“Can you grab some cups for me?” I nodded, rising from my seat to help him in the kitchen.

 

I grabbed some plastic cups, and Sunggyu laughed. “What?”

 

“Nothing it’s just… drinking wine out of those? Our group is real classy.”

 

“Okay, the last thing we need to be handling after hours of traveling is breakable glass. If anything, this would make our fans think that we’re more relatable.” I defended, setting out the cups in a neat line. I jumped in surprise when I felt his arms wrap around my waist. He squeezed me tightly, burying his face in my neck to leave a soft kiss there. I giggled, resting my hands on his forearms. “What was that for?”

 

“I just love you.” Sunggyu whispered, still holding me close. “Do I need a reason to kiss you?”

 

“Never.” I immediately turned around, throwing my arms around his neck. We kissed properly then, his hands moving up to cup my face as we moved together. He pushed me back into the countertop, making me almost bend with the force of the movement, not letting me go for even a second. I moved my fingers into his soft hair, sighing into the kiss as his tongue flicked across my lips. Just when we started to get into it, we heard a noise of protest from behind us.

 

“Okay, seriously? Are we having a group meeting or are you putting on a show?” The maknae rolled his eyes, sitting down at the table and immediately focusing on his phone so he wouldn’t have to entertain our antics for a second longer.

 

“Sorry.” I said sheepishly, unable to stop myself from leaning forward to steal another kiss my boyfriend. Sunggyu gave me a look that said _keep your hands to yourself in front of the maknae_ , but I only shrugged my shoulders. I reluctantly let him go, moving away so he could refocus on his task. He opened up the wine bottle quickly, starting to pour out small portions into the tiny cups.

 

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Sunggyu paused mid pour, looking at me with raised brows. “Well it’s just… we did kind of get loaded the other night and I’m not sure if Dongwoo will survive this.”

 

“Don’t worry.” The elder said reassuringly. “It’s just for one toast. After that we can drink cola and cider. I get that some of us need to detox after the other night.”

 

“Not me. I feel perfectly fine and I will be having a full glass.” Sungjong said breezily, not even bothering to look up from where he was scrolling on his Instagram feed.

 

Sunggyu chuckled, but obliged him. “To be young, and unaffected by hangovers.”

 

“More like to be smart, and to know your limits. Plus, I had much better things to focus on, like making sure I had just the right angle to capture some _amazing_ footage-”  
  
“Enough about that!” Sungyeol’s voice chimed in, and he plopped down in the chair next to Sungjong. “I think our gracious leader is too busy preparing for his announcement to listen to stories or watch any silly drunken footage. I’m sure it will come in handy at a later time.” The two of them high fived each other, giggling as they looked at Sungjong’s phone screen.

 

Sunggyu, obviously not getting the joke, looked at me curiously. “What the hell is happening?” I decided it would be in my best interest to play dumb, so I pretended to be unaware. In reality I would need to find some leverage against the maknae to convince him to send me a copy of that Sunggyu dancing video, because that was something I _needed_ in my life.

 

Myungsoo padded out into the living room, his black hair messy and ruffled. “Did I miss anything?”

 

“Not yet.” I answered, but now that I actually got a good look at him and Sungyeol, they both seemed a little disheveled. I walked over to the visual, throwing an arm around his shoulder. “Looks like someone had a little fun after the airport?” Myungsoo immediately turned deep red, all the way to the tips of his ears.

 

“ _Hyung_.”

 

“Don’t be embarrassed. Enjoy it. But I gotta know… is he a good kisser?” I patted him on the back as Myungsoo yelped, and Sungyeol looked over at us suspiciously.

 

“What are you two over there whispering about?” The brunette asked, his eyes narrowing.

 

“Nothing! Just asking how the rest of the plane ride was since we had to switch seats.” I avoided the question smoothly, skipping back over to Sunggyu’s side.

 

“It’s past ten. Should I go check on the rappers?” Sungjong asked innocently, making me and Sunggyu panic.

 

“No!” We yelled out at the same time, startling the rest of the people in the room.

 

He looked at us weirdly. “Okay…?”

 

“Sorry for yelling… we just… don’t want you to have to-” I started, unsure of where I was going with that.

 

“Get out of your seat for no reason! I’ll text Hoya and tell them to hurry up.” Sunggyu finished smoothly for me, pulling his phone out of his pocket.

  
“Nice save.” I complimented him, and Sunggyu smiled.

 

“Thanks. The last thing we need is for Sungjong to walk in on the two of them, we wouldn’t hear the end of his bitching for _days_.” The leader said knowingly, his fingers flying across the screen as he typed out a message. But it was for nothing, because Hoya and Dongwoo chose that exact moment to make their appearance.

 

“Sorry we’re late!” Dongwoo said sweetly, giving Sunggyu a hug.

 

“We got a bit held up.” Hoya winked at me, and I turned away blushing.

 

The leader shook his head, clearly knowing that Hoya was pushing my buttons but not bothering to do anything about it. “Okay, so now that all of you are here-”

 

The doorbell buzzer went off, making my boyfriend smile. “Perfect timing, actually. That’s dinner. While I go get the food, all of you grab a cup and head into the living room. We can sit on the sofas while we talk.”

 

Everyone nodded, moving forward to grab their wine and follow Sunggyu’s instructions. Dongwoo grimaced, looking down at his cup as if it had personally attacked him. Hoya chuckled, wrapping an arm around the blonde’s waist.

 

“So much for no alcohol, huh?”

 

“I’m going to _die_.” Dongwoo whined, his lips pouting cutely. I gave him a comforting embrace, motioning over to the soda.

 

“Sunggyu said it’s just for a toast. After that we’ll switch over to regular drinks, so don’t get too worried.” I explained, doing my best not to laugh at the immense look on relief on the dancer’s face.

 

Hoya frowned. “A toast? That implies that there’s something to celebrate.”

 

“Why would you be mad about something to celebrate?” I asked bewildered.

 

“I’m not, I’m just… skeptical about Sunggyu’s definition of a good time. I mean it’s… _Sunggyu_.”

 

“Yah, could you just for once do what you’re told without being so difficult?” Sunggyu complained lightheartedly, his arms full with the delivery food. “Hyunnie, grab some napkins and plates please.”

 

“Sure.” I did as he asked, and joined the rest of the guys in the living room. Everyone had pretty much migrated to the floor, the chicken boxes thrown open and a few of the boys already digging in. I hastily handed out the plates, and threw the napkins in the center for anyone who wanted them.

 

I think all of us were unaware of how hungry we really were, but now that the food was here we couldn’t help but to dig in. Every single member was aware that with the comeback preparations starting soon, this would be our last chance to pig out and eat whatever we wanted. Diets and workouts and practices weren’t necessarily fun or enjoyable by any means, but it was a small price to pay to be able to stand on stage and do what we love.

 

And truthfully, I enjoyed the little moments like these. Sure it was great to be able to sing and perform together, but times like these… just talking and laughing amongst each other, eating chicken and relaxing, it made me feel like none of us had really changed. In our hearts we were all still those eager, young boys who were desperate to make their dreams a reality. This was a scene that had happened countless times over the years, and I could only hope that no matter how big or successful we got, we would never forget our roots. That we would appreciate the small things that made us feel like a real family, not just members.

 

We realized that we needed more cups if we were going to save the wine for Sunggyu’s celebration, and I was stoked to see Hoya bear the brunt of going to the kitchen to retrieve more after losing some vigorous rounds of rock, paper, scissors. It was childish, but it was the simple and fair way we decided matters like these. The clear, crisp taste of the cider was welcome after eating some particular spicy wings so I gulped it down quickly. At one point Sunggyu leaned over to wipe some hot sauce off my cheek with his thumb, before he placed it in his mouth suggestively, and we had the pleasure of hearing all the members gag in distaste.

 

“Shut up.” I laughed, looking at them all playfully. “With the way things are going around here, I’m sure we’ll be catching all of you doing _gross_ stuff too sooner or later.”

 

“Not me. Unlike you idiots, I know the meaning of the concept of public decency.” Sungjong said haughtily.

 

“That just implies that you are indecent behind closed doors.” Sungyeol stated, to which the maknae grinned.

 

“Wouldn’t you like to know? Maybe you should ask your little brother.”

 

“Wait, _what_?” Sungyeol squeaked out.

 

“Holy shit, the maknae is banging Sungyeol’s bro!” Hoya egged it on, cackling at the comic look on the brunette’s face.

 

“Let’s not make assumptions-” Myungsoo tried to defuse the situation, but failed to save the day when Sungjong let his next zinger drop.

 

“His dick is totally bigger than yours.”  
  
“Daeyeol 1. Sungyeol 0.” Hoya kept tally, even though Dongwoo was glaring and trying to shush him. Sungyeol looked like he was about to abandon his half gnawed chicken wing in favor of attacking the maknae, so Sunggyu finally stepped in.

 

“Alright! That’s it! No more talk about anything that does not involve Infinite.” I could already see Hoya opening his mouth to find a loophole in Sunggyu’s logic, but Dongwoo reacted quickly to put a hand over his mouth.

 

“Okaaay.” Sunggyu put an end note on that conversation before it could get started up again, calling everyone’s attention to the center of the room as he stood. “I know that all of you are excited to hear my announcement-”

 

“I am literally _dying_. I cannot wait any longer.” Hoya deadpanned through his boyfriend’s hold on him, and Dongwoo was nice enough to elbow him for me.

 

Sunggyu rolled his eyes, soldiering on. “Anyway, as I was saying before I was rudely interrupted, I have some really great news I want to tell you guys. The company was going to share it with you at first but I wanted to be the one to tell you personally.”

 

“Is it bad?” Myungsoo spoke up, his voice laced with concern. He had a protective arm around Sungyeol’s waist, who still looked like he could spring forward at any moment to snatch the maknae. Sungjong on the other hand looked completely unbothered, sipping on his cider with a victorious look on his face.

 

Sunggyu directed his attention to Myungsoo, giving him a warm smile. “No, not at all. I just… I felt like as a group, there’s certain moments and memories that we should only make together. And this is one of those times.”

 

“Okay. We’re listening.” Dongwoo gave a threatening look at the others, and what most people didn’t know was that when Dongwoo wanted to be scary he could be, so the others boys straightened up and gave Sunggyu their full attention.

 

“I think I speak for everyone when I say that the time we spent in America was memorable for all of us. Not just because of the way all of you came together to do something special for me and Woohyun, but… because we got to travel to a foreign country together, for work. First Los Angeles and then Vegas… these two crazy awesome cities that we had only seen in pictures, suddenly came to life. We got to walk those streets and see those sights. And yeah, it was difficult and tiring and exhausting but at the same time, it was amazing. I think each and everyone one of us experienced something overseas, a feeling that was unique and new that we never would have had the pleasure of having if we weren’t in America.”

 

I nodded in agreement, along with the rest of the guys, and Sunggyu continued on.

 

“Traveling overseas… America in general will always be a place of firsts, so I’m really happy that all of us got to make memories there not only amongst the couples, but between all seven of us. I know some of you are regretting the hotel party from before we left-” He looked pointedly at Dongwoo, who waved cheekily. “But I’m really glad that the seven of us made an effort to get together and spend time like that. Actually, I’d really like it if we could continue to do stuff like that as a group… I think it’s important for us to ensure that the relationship between all of us is always solid.”

 

“Of course, Gyu Gee Gee. We all had fun the other night, despite the hell of the morning after. And tonight has been fun to.” Dongwoo said encouragingly.

 

“Okay. Good. I just… these next few months are just going to be the hardest we’ve had in a very, very long time. Maybe _ever_. And I just know that the only way we can make it through is if we have each other to depend on.” The leader explained.

 

“I know I complain a lot but… I always know I can come to any of you if I ever have a real problem. I think the relationship between the group is good.” Sungjong confessed, and everyone murmured in agreement.

 

“Thanks for telling us that. I just worry because I know when we are all overworked and lacking sleep that our patience and understanding can decrease pretty quickly. I just want us all to make an effort, a promise if you will, that no matter what comes next, that we will face it together.”

 

“I know all of us are in. We’ll make you proud hyung. But I gotta admit; the more you talk the more stressed I’m getting. Just tell us what you have to tell us, cause the longer you build it up the more afraid I am that it’s bad news.” Sungyeol admitted, crossing his arms.

 

“Okay, you’re right. So here it goes. So you all already know that the comeback is happening in July.” Everyone nodded. “We’ll do promos in Korea throughout the month. So that means music show recordings back to back, and whatever photo shoots we can pick up for magazines. I’ve received word that we’ll debut our single on Mnet; but it’ll be an award show, so a lot more fanfare than usual. We’ll do two songs, probably Inception along with Destiny if we can master the choreo quickly enough.”

 

I could feel the excitement starting to build in the air. “We’ve never debuted a song at an award show. This is going to be so cool.” Myungsoo realized. “I really think the fans will like it.”  
  
“Of course they will! Destiny is totally going to be a hit.” Sungjong said confidently.

 

“I think the response will be good at the venue, and once the music video drops things will only get better. So I don’t think any of us should worry too much about that.” I chimed in, and Sunggyu glanced at me thankfully.

 

“Are you worried we won’t be able to handle the comeback schedule?” Hoya asked, but Sunggyu denied it.

 

“No. I know that you guys are more than capable of handling a comeback after this many years, so that will be business as usual. It’s what comes afterwards that will test us. Once July is over we will wrap promos for Destiny.”

 

“If anything that’s a shorter promo period for us.” I added. “Is there a reason the company wants to cut it down?”

 

“Yes. That first week of August we will kick things off with a concert.”

 

We are started to cheer; concerts were probably the thing that we all loved doing the most. There was just this insane adrenaline rush that came over us when we were on stage with thousands of people in the audience cheering for us, screaming our names and singing along to all of our songs.

  
“Fuck yes.” Even Hoya was grinning, reaching around the other rapper for a hug.

 

“Will it be another summer concert series?” Sungjong asked.

 

“Oh yeah, those were so fun. I really liked it!” Dongwoo agreed, turning to the leader excitedly. “Are we going to get to have another one so soon?”

 

“Not exactly.” Sunggyu let them down gently. “We will be having more than one concert, but we aren’t going to be using an acoustic style. We’re definitely going for a more stylized, high energy performance this time. We want to put our best foot forward to make sure we impress our fans from all over the world.”

 

“All over the world?” Myungsoo repeated, slightly confused by Sunggyu’s emphasis on the statement. “You mean the people that travel to see us perform?”

 

“Well I talked to the boss and the company has decided that the time has come for _us_ to travel to see _them_.”

 

“This better not be a joke.” Hoya tried to seem nonchalant, but I could tell by the tone of his voice that he was trying to mask his excitement.

 

“Well I don’t want you guys to get _too_ excited. I mean we’ll go to the usual places. Korea. Japan.” Sunggyu started, purposely drawing it out to make us all that much more anxious.

 

“Come on, come on, just tell us!” Dongwoo begged, bouncing in his spot on the floor.

 

“Actually we’re going to be on tour for about four months.”

 

“Four months? Why so long?” The maknae asked.

 

“We need the downtime to prepare and travel to ensure the concert quality is high. We’re going to be traveling around to a lot of places. China, Taiwan, Singapore, Malaysia, the Philippines.”

 

“Oh, so like an Asian tour! That’ll be awesome!” Sungyeol said enthusiastically.

 

The leader shook his head. “Not exactly. It turns out that we’re going to be going to some countries that are pretty far away. Like America-”

 

“Shut the fuck up!” Hoya screamed out in excitement.

 

Sunggyu shrugged. “Not just L.A. We’ll hit up the east coast too. Didn’t you always say you wanted to dance in New York?”

 

“I’m going to fucking pass out.” Hoya deadpanned.

 

“You shouldn’t though. Because then you’d miss the part when I tell you we are going to fucking Europe! France, England, even Germany!”

 

“Holy shit, this can’t be happening! Is this actually happening?” Sungyeol yelled.

 

“Hell yeah! We’re even going to Dubai!” Sunggyu screamed back, and everyone collectively lost their minds. I pulled Myungsoo into a hug, the visual already getting teary and emotional. Hoya and Sunggyu were hugging each other, Dongwoo laughing maniacally as he danced around the room. Sungjong and Sungyeol were screaming in a high pitch that would have gave me a headache at any other time, but at this particular moment I was too fucking pumped to care.

 

“Fuck a hangover; we need to cheers to this!” Dongwoo grabbed his cup of wine, and the rest of us followed suit.

 

“To Infinite.” Sunggyu proposed, and we all echoed his sentiment.

 

“To Infinite!”

 

All of us began to talk excitedly over one another, and Sunggyu disappeared only to return a few seconds later with more alcohol. More drinks were poured as the chatter built up. I made my way around the living room, giving the members hugs and congratulations. I knew that this was a huge moment for all seven of us, and it was nice to be able to create this memory as a group.

 

I really believed that the seven of us were meant to be together, that Infinite was only successful because it was _us_ , and moments like this, we felt closer than just members; we were a family.

 

Sunggyu called us all together for a group hug, and we made a circle as we held one another. “I know we are all excited about this news but I don’t want you guys to forget that we will be _working_ ; this is going to be the most challenging schedule we’ve ever had. Four months of concerts, rehearsals, and travelling is going to be tough on all of us. But I know that if we work together, that we can make it happen and make history while we do it. And who knows? If this concert series goes well, then we might be able to do another world tour in a couple of years.”

 

“We’re going to fucking kill this. We’re going to show everyone what Infinite is all about.” Hoya said from next to me, patting me on the back. “Seriously, I know that all of us are going to do our best to make the fans proud of us.”

 

Sunggyu nodded in agreement. “I know that we’re going to leave a good impression; I believe in us. I checked with the managers and we’ve got no schedules tomorrow, so feel free to spend the rest of the night however you want. I just wanted you all to know about the tour and what’s coming next for Infinite. I love you guys, and I’m happy we are in this together. Now let’s have some fun and celebrate because we’ve officially made it!”

 

Everyone cheered, and we let go of each other to clap our hands. Hoya moved away to put on some music as Dongwoo and Myungsoo started to clear away the empty take out boxes. Sungjong and Sungyeol started to dance around crazily, just feeling the music and vibing off each other. I turned to Sunggyu, who was watching it all unfold with a proud look on his face. I grabbed the wine bottle off of the table, refilling my glass before turning to my boyfriend, but he waved me off.

 

“You aren’t going to drink more?” I asked him.

  
“No; there’s somewhere I want to take you later, and I need to be able to safely drive us there.” Sunggyu responded.

 

“Really? All of us or-”

 

“Just you.” Sunggyu cut me off with a secretive smirk. “I’ve got a feeling that you’re really going to like it.”

 

I stood in front of him, softly swaying my hips to the as the song played; I was curious about what was to come, but for now I was completely content to just enjoy the moment with the guys I loved the most in the world surrounding me.

 

* * *

 

“A part of me just still can’t believe this.” Dongwoo laughed, practically bouncing on the bed with excitement.

 

“I know.” I agreed with him, the shock of it all still brand new. “I mean, I knew we were doing well as a group but _this_ … god, I can’t believe the company is willing to invest so much into us. A _world_ tour.”

 

“Not just Asia.” Dongwoo chimed in. “But the whole freaking world!”

 

I smiled to myself, thinking about the past and the decisions that had brought me here. “I remember when I was trying to decide if I should drop out or not… if I should go all in on music. I was… absolutely terrified. I knew that not finishing school would essentially mean that I would either have to make it, or my future would be ruined. And I auditioned so many places and the only response I would get was rejection. So when I finally got an offer from JYP, I took it. And it didn’t exactly feel like the right fit but… it was _something_. Everyday, I would just practice, practice, practice. I danced until I couldn’t walk, sang until my throat was aching. Did everything I could to make myself stand out. And then one day I walked into the dance practice room, and there’s this guy there; small but so full of fire when he danced. After so many weeks of just going through the motions, suddenly I was inspired again. It was then, all those years ago, that I discovered my inspiration. And I’ve been lucky enough to somehow convince him to fall in love with me along the way.”

 

Dongwoo blushed. “Meeting you was like… a gift. Suddenly I had a friend, someone who made it all feel so much _easier_. Being away from home, the difficult training schedule, just… everything became better once we started spending time together.”  
  
“And when I wanted us to take a chance on this small little company, give up JYP for Woollim, you didn’t think I was crazy. After we auditioned and got accepted you just… you came with me.”

 

My boyfriend looked at me honestly. “I told you back then and I’ll tell you again; I couldn’t ever imagine doing this without you. I only want to stand on stage if you’re up there with me. Being an idol is demanding but when I’m with you, it just feels like a reward.”

 

“And now because of it, we’ll get to travel the world. Go to places we only dreamed about before. I mean, I thought wishing for America was too much, but we are really going all over. Just think of all the fans we will get to meet, all the things we’ll get to see. I think… this could be one of the best times of our lives, and we get to experience it all together.”

 

“We’ll get to see Buckingham Palace, the Eiffel Tower… we’re literally going to be going to the most romantic places in the world. And we’ll be getting paid to do it!” Dongwoo said excitedly.

 

I reached out for him, wrapping him up into my arms. “You know what makes it even better?”

 

“What?”

 

“That fact that it won’t be just Infinite; but Infinite H as well.”

 

Dongwoo’s eyes grew bigger. “Oh my god, you’re right! I didn’t even think about that! Our album came out this year so they’d be crazy not to give us a special stage.”  
  
“Of course they will.” I said confidently, grinning into his neck. “Not just one song; but _two_.”

 

“Oh, someone is starting to get greedy.”  
  
“I’m _always_ greedy with you.” I nipped playfully at his neck, making him squeal. “Special Girl is an obvious choice. But what do you think for the other one?”  
  
“Victorious Way.” Dongwoo answered without hesitation.

 

“Really?” I was bit surprised by his answer. Not that I didn’t like the song, but I just didn’t expect Dongwoo of all people to make up his mind so quickly.

 

“I mean the lyrics are spot on. The beat is amazing and we can totally come up with some sick choreo for it. It’s perfect.”

 

I licked my lips, closing my eyes as I imagined it. Me and Dongwoo loved to freestyle with dance during practice, and Victorious Way was often one of the songs we messed around to. “All of the people around the world will be so lucky to see our stage.”

 

Dongwoo laughed. “I think that might be a tad too overconfident.”  
  


“It’s not; because I’m not talking about me.” Dongwoo turned around in my lap, his big brown eyes looking up at me.

 

“Oh yeah?”

 

“Yeah. Just think about how many people are going to watch you dance… it’s when you are the most beautiful. When you move there’s so much passion and fire in your body that it’s just fucking mesmerizing. They’re all going to fall in love with you after seeing you shine on stage but in the end, you’ll only be coming home with me.”

 

“Damn right.” Dongwoo giggled, throwing his arms around my neck. “I don’t even notice the crowd when you’re on stage with me. All I can see is you.”

 

It was true that something magical happened when we performed together; the way we feed off of each other’s energy, took our performance to the next level to give the fans an unforgettable hip hop experience, was just something that was a distinctly H thing. I would never say it out loud but the possessive part of me loved knowing that there were some things that Dongwoo would never be able to get from the other Infinite members on stage; only from me. Those little moments we would have during concerts, when our eyes would connect and he would give me that secretive smile… I lived for it.

 

“You know I’m going to never stop being so crazy about you.” I told him honestly, pushing my hands through his soft blonde hair.

 

“Good; because I’m just as crazy about you.” Dongwoo admitted with a soft whisper, leaning forward to bring our lips together. I reached around his trim waist, wrapping my arms around him tightly.

 

“How would you feel about finishing what we started earlier?” I asked pointedly, shifting my hips up so he would know exactly what I meant.

 

“Did you lock the door?” The blonde panted out, his patience already starting to slip as I teasingly grinded against him.

 

“Do you think I would risk a repeat interruption?”

 

“You’re right.” Dongwoo leaned back, pulling off his shirt in one quick movement. “It’s time for us to celebrate.” He kissed me again, hints of his desperation starting to come through as he whined. I loved having him on top of me, loved seeing him be so vulnerable and open and _needy_ , just for me.

 

I grinned into the kiss as I rolled him over so he was underneath me. I let my eyes wander over his body, taking off my own clothes slowly to heighten the anticipation. He looked into my eyes and in that moment we both knew, I was going to give him a _celebration_ he would never forget.

 

* * *

“Where exactly are you taking me?” My fingers were clutching onto Sunggyu’s hand, and truthfully I was feeling a little anxious.

 

“It’s called a surprise for a reason.” Sunggyu teased me, guiding me forward with a firm hand on the small of my back.

 

“I know that. It’s just… part of me was hoping that the first time we would use blindfolds that we would be wearing a lot less clothes and a bed would be involved.”

  
Sunggyu chuckled, continuing to lead me down the street. “Unfortunately, this is not an elaborate scheme to get in your pants. There’s something important I’d actually like to show you.”

 

“Well is it going to happen any time soon? It feels like we’ve been walking forever. Are you sure no one is going to spot us?” I asked nervously.

 

“I’m sure. It’s pretty late so there’s not many people out on the streets. Plus, we’re wearing hats and masks so I’m sure no one will pay us any attention.” Sunggyu stated. “But that doesn’t matter anymore cause we’re here.”

 

I felt Sunggyu’s fingers start to pull at the knot at the back of my head, and finally the blindfold was falling away. I blinked a couple of times, my eyes adjusting to the light after going without it for so long. But when I looked around there wasn’t much to see; we were standing in what appeared to be a skeleton of a building, mostly just a concrete frame. The area was basically abandoned, construction tape and various materials scattered around the dusty floor. I turned in a full circle, my eyes going everywhere as I tried to figure out why my boyfriend would want me to see this so badly.

 

“Okay… I must be missing something because this just looks like an old building to me.”

 

“It’s not an old building; it’s actually the opposite.”

 

I sighed exasperatedly. “Okay, so it’s a new building that hasn’t been finished yet. I fail to see how concrete slabs qualify as romantic.”

 

Sunggyu smiled, walking up behind me to wrap his arms around my waist as he rested his chin on my shoulder. “Because you’re focusing on what it is right now, instead of what it could be.” He tilted my head to the left. “A recording studio here.” He pointed to the other side of the building. “And over there, a dance practice room with actual air conditioning that’s big enough for all seven of us. And on the second floor, a game room so we have a play to relax and cool off. Some offices for the staff, rooftop furniture so we could have a nice place to film for fans.”

 

“Wait.” I looked over my shoulder at him. “What is this building supposed to be?”

 

“It’s _ours_. Well, I mean it’s the company’s but Woohyun… look around. This is going to be our new home. No more broken things, no more making do with whatever we’re given. Because of our success, as a group and as a company, we get to build somewhere brand new, something that all of us can be proud of.”

 

“Holy shit.” The realization finally started to sink in for me. “We’re actually going to have a legit place to go to work everyday? Not that the current building is terrible or anything but-”

 

“It’ll be nothing compared to this. I really think this will be good for us; not only because it’s better working conditions but creatively… we’ll be able to write music here, practice recording and singing in private booths, just think about how much you’ll be able to do with your composing. State of the art equipment, the newest technology from the best brands. You’ll be able to write and produce here with such higher quality. I literally can’t wait to see what beautiful songs you come up with.”

 

I couldn’t resist any longer, I turned around in his arms to pull him into an embrace. “First the world tour and now this? God, I can’t believe this. It’s just like… all of our hard work, all the bad times and the struggles and the uncertainty… we really made it. Infinite is now at this level and that’s crazy and overwhelming and amazing all at once.”

 

“I know.” Sunggyu laughed. “I’ll bring the rest of the guys by tomorrow but I just wanted you to see it first.”  
  


“Thanks. It means a lot.” I looked around again, my mind already spinning with the possibilities of what this place would become. “When will it be finished?”

 

“It’ll be a long time. Probably over a year. Maybe two.”

 

“Really? How come?”

 

“I’m not super sure on the specifics, all I know is that the company has bought the rights to this building and has submitted plans to the city to restart construction. Then an architect will be brought in to come up with a design. I told the boss that I thought the members might have some ideas and things, so hopefully they’ll take those into account too. But it’s construction and everyone knows that when it comes to building things it always takes twice as long as you expect it to.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“I know it might be a little preemptive to tell you all about it now but… I think with the tour coming and everything, it might just be nice to have the new building as a thought in the back of your head. Something to look forward to when we are all tired, exhausted, and cranky.”

 

“This is why you’re such a good leader. Always doing your best to take care of us. I know we don’t always make it easy.”

 

“That is an _understatement_.” Sunggyu acknowledged, the both of us laughing.

 

“I know, I know. But I know it can be a thankless job sometimes and just in case we haven’t said it enough lately, I know for a fact that a reason all seven of us are still here-” I motioned around me at the building. “The reason that this is even a reality is because you led us here. You kept us strong and focused; you never let us give up. You made Infinite what it is today and I’ll never stop being grateful for that.”

 

“Infinite is what it is because of _all_ of us. No member is more important than the other. At least when it comes to business.”

 

“Oh, so it’s different in your personal life?” I played along, smiling at him cheekily.

 

“There is a certain someone that I like to keep close… more than the other members. Someone that brings me a different kind of comfort after a long day.”

 

“Oh yeah? And what’s this guy like?”

 

“He’s amazing.” Sunggyu accentuated the statement with a kiss, all over my face but purposely avoiding my lips. “Talented. _Beautiful_. Damn near takes my breath away every single morning I wake up next to him.”

 

“You think that’ll ever change?”

 

“I can only pray that it won’t, because without him I’d be truly lost.” Sunggyu admitted softly, finally leaning in to seal his confession with a kiss. “You know how much I love you, right?”

 

“I do. And I love you too.”

 

“Good. Don’t ever stop.” He brought our lips together again, his fingers tightening on my waist as the kiss lingered. “You ready for me to take you home?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

I could tell by the look in his eyes that we wouldn’t be going to sleep anytime soon.

 

* * *

The three of us laid on the big bed together, Sungjong in the middle with the laptop in front of him. Even though the hysteria from Sunggyu’s announcement hadn’t died down in the slightest, the maknae was still adamant about _not getting scarred for life over your disgusting PDA_ and had deemed it best to separate us by taking the spot in between me and Sungyeol.

 

In a way since we were the youngest of all the members, we tended to stick together during times like these. We had been discussing the concert, looking at ideas online and trying to find inspiration.

 

“Are you sure you don’t want to do someone together? The three of us?” I asked. “We could always do an Orange Caramel cover again…”

 

Sungjong laughed. “I promise, it’s fine. We can’t keep repeating concepts if we want to keep the fans on their toes! And what kind of subunit would we be anyway? I mean we are the hottest people in the group…”

 

“Infinite V!” Sungyeol cut in. “For visual.”

 

“Nah.” Sungjong disagreed. “V is for voice. That one’s already reserved for Sunggyu and Woohyun after last year’s concert.”

 

“Then…” Sungyeol thought for a moment. “F? For face.”

 

“God, you are terrible at this. Myungsoo, never let your boyfriend bring this up with the CEO. He’ll ruin our subunit with a terrible name and probably get himself elected the leader for his troubles.” Sungjong claimed, but Sungyeol was smiling.

 

“Hey, I kind of like the sound of that. I’d totally be an awesome leader. Don’t you think so?” I nodded in agreement, smiling at him from the other side of the maknae’s body.

 

“Don’t think I can’t see you two being gross just because I’m focused on the computer screen.” Sungjong reminded us, pulling up a video to call Sungyeol to attention. “Myungsoo, you’re better on your own. Knowing you there’ll probably be a guitar and some love song involved.”

 

“Oh! You could do Love U Like U from your drama last year! That song is really sweet and it shows off your vocals well. Like a confession sort of stage.”

 

“Only if I get to confess to you in the end.”

 

Sungjong shook his head. “The only silver lining to this is that there’s no way the company would ever let you do that.”

 

“Oh, I’m gonna do it.” Sungyeol said deviously. “I don’t know how, where, or when… but I’m totally going to crash one of your performances.”

 

I couldn’t help but love the idea of it; sure the fans would just think it was some over the top fan service for their benefit, but deep down me and Sungyeol would know the significance of it. I loved having private little things between us that no one else could ever be able to take away.

 

“ _Enough_.” The maknae begged, angling the computer screen towards my boyfriend. “Let’s do something together, yeah? The fans love it when we team up if Troublemaker was any indication.”

 

“I am _not_ crossdressing ever, ever again. I still can’t believe you tricked me into playing Hyuna’s role in the first place when you knew all of her choreo before we even started practicing. I don’t care how much the fans enjoy it, I gotta draw the line somewhere.”

 

“You’ll such a liar! Deep down you know you liked it otherwise you wouldn’t have saved that dress! I would bet money that it happens again at a concert sometime in our future career.” Sungjong threw down the gauntlet, and Sungyeol took the bait.

 

“Fine! One million won says it’ll never happen! Myungsoo, you are our witness.”

 

“Okay.” I laughed, deciding it was just easier to play along with them. “But my opinion still stands; you are gorgeous no matter what you are wearing. Or not wearing for that matter.”

 

“ _Anddd_ just like that, my appetite is gone.”

 

“You don’t have an appetite! You just ate an obscene amount of chicken!” Sungyeol pushed him playfully.

 

“Then you guys better stop or I’ll get sick and throw it right back up!” Sungjong countered, but he couldn’t hide his smile. “Just stop being so in love and happy for five seconds and check out these videos. Have you heard of Skrillex? I think DJing could be a cool new concept for us.”

 

We spent the rest of the night joking around and brainstorming about possible concepts; and if Sungjong didn’t realize that Sungyeol was holding my hand and blowing kisses my way when he wasn’t paying attention, then that was just fine with me. I had all the time in the world to get closer to him, my new _boyfriend_ , and that was really all that mattered.

 

* * *

By the time we had gotten back to the dorms, the common area was dark. Sunggyu and I managed to slip into our bedroom without being disturbed, but that was exactly what we wanted.

 

The moment I got the door closed behind us, Sunggyu was on me; kissing me with a desperation that let me know that he had been aching to do this for a long time.

 

“I love you so much Hyunnie.” He whispered, tugging me towards the bed.

 

I followed him willingly, the both of us collapsing on the bed in a tangle of limbs. Sunggyu reached into his back pocket, pulling out the smooth strip of cloth. “What was it you were saying about blindfolds earlier?”

 

I laughed, kissing him brazenly. “That it is an amazing idea.” I tried to reach forward to grab it but Sunggyu pulled it away, keeping it out of my reach.

 

“I was thinking that we should try it the other way around this time.” He tilted up, bending forwards so he could tie it securely behind his own head. He finished pulling the knot through, laying back with a sense of finality. “I am officially at your mercy.”

 

“What am I going to do with you?” I whispered, my mind turning with all the possibilities. “Where should I even start?”

 

“Getting naked would be nice.” Sunggyu suggested, wiggling underneath me. I was completely on board with that, so I started to work on his jeans.

 

“I don’t think I could ever get tired of doing this.” I admitted, pulling the denim off of his long legs. “I love taking off your clothes, exposing your body, piece by piece. Making you lay bare and open and vulnerable, just for me.” I pushed underneath him, making him roll over onto his stomach.

 

My hands moved from his shoulders, slowly tracing down his back to settle on his ass. I grabbed his soft curves playfully, grinding down my hips just a bit, knowing that the rough fabric of my jeans against his skin would drive him crazy.

 

“You know… you made me feel so good the other night with your tongue. I think it’s only fair that I return the favor. You want me to lick you open, Sunggyu?”

 

“Oh my god.” Sunggyu breathed out, his back already arching at just the thought. “Yeah baby.”

 

I licked my lips, slowly crawling down the bed until I was in the prime position. Using my hands I started to pull the round plumps apart, encouraging him to open up his legs further. “Lift up your hips.” He complied, and I slipped my arms underneath his thighs so I could hold him easier. This way I would be able to control him more firmly, and I smiled wickedly as I started to map out my plan. I knew exactly how oversensitive my boyfriend could be when I pleased him, and I was determined to drive him to the brink tonight.

 

I wanted to be a tease, so I continued to knead his ass, grabbing handfuls to show off his opening, blowing air across it. He let out a little yelp, his hips trying to jerk away but I held him steady. I wondered what it must be like for him; blindfolded, unable to see what was coming next, not knowing when I would finally strike.

 

“Truthfully, I had never really considered doing this to someone. But when you did it to me the other night, god the way it felt to have your tongue inside me, how sexy it was for me to ride your face like that-”

 

Sunggyu growled. “Fuck, Woohyun. Come on.”

 

I kissed along the slope of his ass, just soft little pecks. “What? I thought you liked it when I told you how I’m feeling.”  
  
“I do, it’s just-”

 

“What? Don’t you wanna know how I felt when you teased my rim with your tongue? The way it made tingles crawl across my skin, how I had to grab onto the sheets for balance because you made my knees weak?” I moved back towards his center, nosing at him. “You want me to make you feel like that too?”

 

“ _Woohyun_.” It was both a warning and a plea, so I decided to give in. I started off with one long lick, just the bottom all the way to the top, just to make him squirm. Then I zeroed in on his entrance, twirling my tongue around in a circle. Sunggyu moaned, long and loud, and I flicked my eyes up to take him in. His head was buried in the pillow, turned to the side. His lips were parted, little pants escaping as I licked him.

 

“You’re being too loud Gyu. We wouldn’t want to disturb the other members.” I flattened my tongue, moving it across him achingly slow before pulling back. “Imagine what they’d think, if they saw you in here like this, rutting into the mattress as I ate you out.”

 

He groaned, trying to hold it in but unable to as I picked up the tempo of my movements.

 

“Put your fingers in your mouth. I want you to suck on them, get them nice and wet for me.” Sunggyu obeyed, moving the digits to his mouth and slipping them inside. Now his cries were muffled, so I was able to fully devote myself to the task.

 

I wanted to really make him squirm, so I curled my tongue, starting to push it as deep inside as it could go. Sunggyu was really moving now, and I wasn’t even sure if he was aware of it. But I used my arm strength to keep his hips firmly locked in place, not letting him escape me for even a second.

 

He was really beautiful like this, writhing in pleasure and begging for mercy. My own cock was stirring in my pants, begging for some relief as I watched him start to lose it. I knew if I wanted to I could probably make him come just from this, but I was feeling a little too impatient myself to drag it on any longer.

 

I sat back on my heels, smacking him roughly on the ass just to make him jump. “Did you like my tongue?” Sunggyu nodded, the fingers still in his mouth. “Do you want more?” I reached up, grabbing his wrist to free his voice.

 

“Yes, please Hyunnie.”

 

“Then stretch yourself open.” I ordered, moving away to watch the show unfold. I saw the beginning of a protest start to unfold in his body, but he inevitably gave in. He reached back blindly, feeling along his body to find his entrance. My hands gravitated towards his ass again. “Let me help you babe.” I chuckled darkly, watching as he twisted his back to achieve the right angle. “No, no. Not like that. Up on your knees.” He turned his head over his shoulder and even through the blindfold I could feel the glare he was sending me.

 

“You have to prepare yourself if you want me to fuck you. But if that’s not what you want-”

 

“No.” Sunggyu cut me off, already moving to shift up to his knees. “I want it.” He fumbled for a second, but once he had his balance he reached back towards his opening, slowly pushing one finger in. I watched, fascinated as his body sucked it in, those beautiful fingers moving in and out, in and out.

 

I couldn’t wait any longer, so I started to pull off my clothes. When I moved off the bed to push down my jeans, Sunggyu faltered, his hand stopping.

 

“Hyunnie?”

 

“It’s okay.” I shushed him, reaching out to touch his leg to soothe him. “I’m just getting undressed, keep going.” An idea popped into my head, and I reached over to the dresser, pulling out the lube and tossing it onto the mattress. “Put another in.”

 

“Okay.” Sunggyu panted, sliding in the next one with a sigh. I crawled back behind him, running my hands up and down his thighs. His skin was so smooth, so soft as he stretched himself open.

 

“Don’t rush.” I scolded him when I saw him contemplating a third, and I knew it was too quick. I reached around to grab onto his cock, just holding him steady. He gasped when he felt my touch there, his body arching into my touch. “You like that?”

 

“Yeah.” Sunggyu rested his head on his front arm as he moved his hand faster. “I need more Hyunnie.”

 

I squeezed his cock, keeping my hand in place, feeling it grow underneath my fingertips. “You want me to jerk you off?”

 

“Mhmm.” I kissed along his hips, starting to move my hand along the length of his shaft. I used my thumb to finger the slit, using the precome to make the slide go smoother. The silky skin shifted easier, so I stroked him faster just the way I knew he liked it, twisting my hand a bit at the top.

 

“Want do you think will make you come first? My hand on your cock or your fingers?”

 

“ _Both_.” Sunggyu laughed, biting his lip.

 

“Funny you mention that.” I pulled my hand away from his cock with one final squeeze.

 

“Hey-”

 

“Don’t complain. It’s only for a moment.” I reached over with my other hand, popping open the top of the tiny bottle. I upended it, pouring a genering amount into my hand, rubbing them together to warm it up. “I had something new I wanted to try.”

 

I looked back to where his fingers were still moving. “How many do you have in?”

 

“Three. I’m almost ready-”

 

“Not yet.” I pulled his cheeks apart, pouring some of the lube across his opening. His hissed at the coolness, but it made his fingers slide in with much more ease. “Take one out.”  
  
“Why?”  
  
“I think the point of wearing a blindfold is to focus on the sensations and stop asking so many questions.” I chided him, smacking him again on the ass in a light punishment.

 

“Fine.” He grumbled, still working in two fingers diligently. “But you better do something quick or I’ll, _oh_!”

 

I chuckled, my own finger having slipped in seamlessly next to his own. “How does that feel?”

 

“It’s, uh-” He lost his eloquence, leaning back into the touch. “It’s…”

  
“Good?” I helped him out, using my angle to make him curl his fingers along with my own. It was heady, knowing that both of us were working together to stretch him open. “I thought you could use a little help getting ready for my cock.”

 

“It’s… very much appreciated.” Sunggyu started whining when I moved my other hand back to his length, stroking him with a tight, firm grip. I leaned down, my chest brushing against his back. This way I could hear his raspy breaths with clarity, could press up close to feel his body actually shiver when I found just the right angle. Our fingers worked together to open up his body with deliberate and practiced movements. I could feel him getting antsy beneath me, his body shifting not due to any discomfort but a lack of patience.

 

“ _Woohyun_.” Sunggyu lifted his head from the pillow, his hair a mess. “I want- I need more.”

 

“You think you can handle four?”

 

Sunggyu laughed darkly. “That’s… not exactly what I was thinking.”

 

I smirked, my teeth nibbling on the meat of his shoulder. “But I’m sure you wouldn’t be opposed. Two of you, two of me. All inside you at once.” My voice grew deeper, my own heartbeat picking up in tempo as he widened his legs, his knees digging into the mattress as he attempted to support himself.

 

“Do it.” He ordered with no uncertainty, his tongue peeking out to lick his lips.

 

My hand let go of his length, reaching out blindly to find the lube. There wasn’t any resistance at the moment, but the last thing I wanted was to hurt him. Truthfully four fingers would be quite the stretch; even if my own cock was bigger in length it wouldn’t be matched in girth. This would push Sunggyu to the edge, which was exactly what I wanted.

 

Popping the cap, I drizzled some more lube onto where our fingers were working, making the slide that much easier. “You ready?” I asked, giving him that one last moment to prepare himself.

 

“Yeah. Yeah, come on.”

 

“Slow down. Let me lead.” I instructed him, and his hand steadied. “Keep your fingers in, just like that.” Making sure my index and middle fingers were nice and wet I slowly started to push past his rim. It was a tight squeeze, the hiss in his breath letting me know he felt the resistance. “Just breathe.” I encouraged him, continuing to push deeper until I breached him completely.

 

Sunggyu moaned, his head falling back down to the pillow with a thud. “ _Fuck_.”

 

“Let me know when-”

 

“I’m ready, I’m ready.” He chanted, his arm shaking as he tried to keep his fingers in place.

 

“Move them with me. In and out.” With my momentum of my own hand I was able to guide his movements, and soon enough we were moving in tandem, working all four digits into his eager body.

 

“Faster.” Sunggyu begged, starting to curl his fingers. “God, let me come. I’m so close.”

 

“Just from this?” I smiled into his skin. “I know you can baby, I want to hear you.”

 

It was almost as if Sunggyu was waiting for the order, and within moments he was coming, his body shuddering under the wave of pleasure. I wrapped my free arm around his waist to prevent him from collapsing, just holding him as he rode it out. I eased him onto his back slowly, moving away quickly to grab the nearest shirt to clean it off.

 

“That better have not been mine.” Sunggyu grumbled as he felt the fabric move across his skin, making me laugh.  
  


“I give you an amazing orgasm, and you give me nagging in return?”

 

“Just know that you’ll be doing laundry in the morning.” Sunggyu said lazily, his legs sprawled out on the bed.

 

“Ready for this to come off?” I asked, my finger slipping beneath the smooth band around his eyes.

 

“Please. I want to see you.” He was so cute when he got pouty, and I untied it in one fell swoop. He opened his eyes, looking adorable as he blinked, before finally focusing on me with a dazed expression on his face.

 

“How was it?”

 

“It was nice. Next time you’ll have to let me blindfold you.” Sunggyu grinned, grabbing the back of my neck to pull me into a kiss. I hadn’t realized how long it had been since I had tasted those lips, and I immediately melted into it. It wasn’t until I was maneuvered onto my back with Sunggyu straddling my thighs that I had realized I had been tricked.

 

My boyfriend smiled wickedly as he loomed over me. “I think it’s time for me to be in control for a while, yeah?” He bit his lip, his hand slowly stroking down my chest. He sat down on his heels, resting his weight right on top of my erection. “Is this for me?” It wasn’t a question that didn’t need to be answered verbally, and any witty reply I might have had disappeared the moment he shifted down to place his lips around my cock. He started off with one hard suck, shocking my body into attention.

 

There was just something about his mouth on my cock that just rendered me momentarily speechless every single time. The way he closed his eyes, completely devoted himself to the task, just for my pleasure. One of his hands wrapped around the base of my hardness, holding it in place as he bobbed his head up and down.

 

“You’re so good at this.” I praised him, my fingers running through his hair. I wanted nothing more than for him to keep going, but I was already so close to the edge after everything we had done before that I knew I had to put an end to it. “God, I love it when you suck my cock Gyu.”

 

“You want to come?” Sunggyu asked naughtily, his hand moving as his tongue licked the head, making me jump.

 

“I- I do.” I choked out. “But only once I’m inside of you.”

 

My boyfriend looked absolutely delighted at that prospect, slinking up the bed in one swift movement. “You want it like this? Me on top of you, using you for my own pleasure?” Sunggyu straddled my waist, reaching behind his back with one hand to grab onto my length, holding it in position.

 

“Yes, yes, yes.” I bucked up my hips, my fingers brushing across his thighs. I watched as he grabbed the lube, slicking up my hardness with a quick hand.

 

And just like that, he held my cock steady and sank down; inch by inch. He threw his head back, relishing in the stretch as my length disappeared into his body. I couldn’t help myself, I immediately grabbed onto his hips, pulling him down so I could get in deep. His body rocked forward, his hands resting on my chest to stay upright.

 

“Come on baby.” I encouraged him, using the strength in my arms to help him bounce up and down.

 

Sunggyu was in his element; I loved seeing him take charge when he was in bed with me. He was so confident in himself, it made him so incredibly sexy. The way he moved his hips, the way the muscles in his thighs flexed every time he rose and fell, even the little beads of sweat that fell down his body as he exerted himself were hypnotizing.

 

“I’m not going to last long.” I warned him; he felt too perfect and he was too beautiful. Every time I was inside of him it was like paradise, and sometimes that feeling was too much for me to handle.

 

“S’okay.” Sunggyu gasped out, my cock buried all the way inside as he swirled his hips in a circle, grinding down so that the tip of my length continuously rubbed against his prostate. “Just make me come again.”  
  
“Yeah.” I agreed, reaching forward to grab onto his length, stroking him in time with my thrusts. I snapped my hips up, amping up the force behind my movements to drive him towards his release. He put a hand on his mouth, trying to conceal his scream but it was mostly fruitless. I felt the spurts of his come paint across my chest, and he sagged in exertion. I rolled him to the side, pulling one of my legs over my hip to split them apart.

 

“I’m almost there.” I promised, sliding back in with a singular focus. My fingers tightened on his thigh as I pounded my hips forward in hard, quick thrusts. Before long I was crying out, moaning into his neck as the orgasm hit me, coming into his addictive heat, the rest of the world disappearing as my vision whited out. I stayed inside of him for a bit longer than necessary, stroking my fingertips up and down his back as we returned back to baseline.

 

With a delicate warning, I pulled out of him and gathered enough strength to leave the bed to find proper supplies to tidy us up. I touched him gently, moving the warm washcloth over his skin lovingly as I cleaned him, before rejoining him back in bed.

 

I leaned over to kiss him softly on the lips, unable to hide my smile. “I love you.”

 

“I love you too.” He responded, throwing an arm around my shoulders to pull me closer.

 

I laid flat on my back, feeling winded but sated. Laughing to myself, I realized that we hadn’t done that great of a job of keeping quiet. “You know the boys are going to kill us, right?”

 

“Nah.” Sunggyu disagreed. “Hoya and Dongwoo probably gave us a run for a money to be honest. And the other three are probably on cloud nine after the world tour news.” He paused, thinking on the subject. “...Maybe I should invest in some ear plugs for the members though, just in case.”

 

“Such a thoughtful leader. Always putting us first; steering us on the path to greatness.”

 

Sunggyu laid on his back, staring up at the ceiling with a concerned look on his face. “Yeah… that’s me.” The tone of his voice was a bit off, setting off my concern. I rolled over in bed, and was surprised by the conflict I could see in his eyes.

 

“That’s not the face I’m used to seeing after we’ve made love.” I said cheekily, trying to joke as I curled into his side. “What’s wrong baby?” The older boy shook his head, but I didn’t let it go. “Come on, you can tell me.”

 

Sunggyu shrugged. “I know I can talk to you about anything Hyunnie. I”m just… I honestly don’t know if I should.”

 

“But why?” I pressed.

 

Sunggyu rolled over, turning to face me. He pushed the hair out of my eyes, smiling at me sadly. “Because you’re happy. Because this has been an amazing day, not just for the group, but for us. After showing you the new building and coming back here and… you know.”

 

“Yeah, I know.” I laughed, biting my lip. “And I love that you shared that with me, and I’m excited to know that our careers are moving in such a good direction. But I also know that nothing is more important to me then your happiness, and if you feel like there’s something you can’t share with me… if you think I’m not strong enough to handle it then that’s a problem.”

 

“I don’t think that. I would _never_ think that.” Sunggyu said strongly. “Woohyun… you’re the strongest person I know. You’ve been through hard times, not just because you’re an idol but because of, well… us. I know time was difficult for you but you made it through to the other side, better and healthier than ever. And I’m _beyond_ proud of you for that. For putting yourself and your happiness first, so taking a chance on me and opening up your heart when everything was telling you to run the other way. I… I love you Woohyun, and I don’t think I’ll ever stop. But _because_ I love you so much, there’s also a part of me that wants to… protect you in a sense, shield you from things that I know will make you sad.”

 

I sighed. “But you have to understand Gyu, that’s exactly what a real partner _doesn’t_ do. If we go through the rest of our lives tiptoeing around the hard issues and hoping things will just work out on its own, then we’ll be setting ourselves up for disappointment. We are supposed to be equals, we are supposed to share the burdens of life. If you are concerned about something, if you are hurting… then I’m hurting too. You can’t expect me to just pretend I don’t know something is bothering you.”

 

“I… a part of me just doesn’t want to get you all worked up for nothing. There’s a chance it might not work out and if I tell you then it doesn’t even happen-”

 

“Sunggyu, we can’t make decisions based on hypotheticals. Tell me what’s going on, and we’ll get through it together. I promise.”

 

“Okay.” The leader sat up in bed, letting the covers pool down at his waist. He ruffled his hair, a gesture I knew meant that he was nervous. “So the CEO mentioned something to me, but it was… I don’t know, I just don’t feel like he was telling me the whole story.”

 

I sat up too. “So what did he say?”

 

“Well, it was when we were in Vegas. You know when I told you he wanted to have lunch with me alone?”

 

“Yeah. But we’ve all had one on ones with the CEO, that’s not unusual. And after what you told us today, I figured that that’s when he told you about the tour.”

 

Sunggyu nodded. “Yeah. He laid out the company’s plan for me; the different countries, the potential schedule. It was… a lot to take in. It’s not just that our group has never attempted something like this… but our company hasn’t either.”  
  
“They’ve had artists before, but they’ve never managed a group like ours.” I said knowingly.

 

“Right. So obviously… the company wants us to go global. Touring and visiting new places means exposing our brand, gaining new fans, and increasing our reputation.”

 

“All in all good things.” I supplied. “So why is this is a problem?”

 

“It’s not that it’s a problem. It’s more like… a logistical nightmare. Different countries means different languages, staff we’ve never worked with, places that we have no business relationship with. We’re essentially going to be a fish out of water at every single new tour stop overseas. Sure if things go well and ticket sales met expectations we’ll earn money in the long run, but the up front costs of booking venues and purchasing flights and securing staff… this is going to be in the billion won range.”  
  
“Fuck.” I crossed my arms, that number making my eyes go a little crossed. “But… surely the company can handle it? Why bring it up if they can’t afford it, or if they think we won’t be successful in the long run?”  
  
“I think they do believe in us. It’s just… the boss has decided that it might be best if he didn’t go it alone anymore. He’s been talking to other businesses, floating the idea of changing the company-”

 

“You don’t mean...” My eyebrows rose. “Is he considering _selling_ the company?”

 

“The word he used when he brought it up in conversation with me was merger.”

 

I balked, unable to comprehend what my boyfriend is telling me. “Are you saying that we might not even work for Woollim anymore? That some company is just going to come in and take over everything? What’s going to happen to us?”

 

“The boss assured me that if the acquisition does happen, that it will only help us. The new company has more experience with managing big artists and-”

 

“What company?” I cut him off, and Sunggyu sighed, looking away.

 

“...SM.”

 

“Fucking hell.” I cursed, my head in my hands. “Sunggyu this is _bad_. SM artists are legends but… that comes with a heavy price. Part of the reason all of us picked Woollim was because their contracts were fair but if we are under SM, we lose all control! Not just concerning our pay, but everything! No more influence on music, or contributions for our concepts. The last thing SM cares about is creativity. Everything that makes us Infinite is the opposite of what SM believes in. They’ll just turn us into robots, putting out whatever song matches the latest trend without giving a damn what we think about it. They don’t treat their employees like artists, they treat them like products.”

 

“I know… I know it’s fucking scary. This is why I didn’t want to tell you!”

 

I reached out for his hand, rubbing my thumb across the back of it. “No, I’m glad you did. Yeah, it’s unsettling but I can’t imagine what it’s been like for you to have this lurking in the back of your mind for the past couple of days. Is it a done deal or?”

 

“It’s looking like it’s going to happen to facilitate the tour. It’s not one hundred percent but… it’s got a high probability of becoming a reality.” Sunggyu shrugged. “The only consolation I have is that the company will more than likely keep it’s name.”

 

“Wait, what? How is that possible if we get bought out?”

 

“The way I understand it, there’s a subsidiary of SM that will be buying a portion of our shares. But the boss and our current board of executives will keep a majority so that most of the final decisions will be left to them. It’s… disheartening but it might not be the end of the world.”

 

I shook my head. “The only thing that fans will care about is that Infinite is attached to SM. Think of how many people liked us because we were different. Who’s to say there won’t be backlash? People that leave us, fans that say that we’ve sold out?”

 

“I… Unfortunately I don’t think that is avoidable. But… I have to believe that there are fans that believe in _us_. Who know that business and acquisitions have nothing to do with the seven of us and our desire to make music. I think as long as we promise to stay together, to do our best to fight for the authenticity of our music and creative control in our upcoming albums…”

 

“Then maybe we’ll come out on the other side okay.” I finished for him. “In fact… I know it will be okay.”

 

“Really?” Sunggyu asked surprised.

 

“Yeah. Because Infinite has you. A leader that will do anything and everything in his power to make sure the members are taken care of. I know that sometimes you learn things, hear things that the rest of us don’t and… I know that you are brave and strong, and that you won’t let someone in a suit dictate what Infinite is supposed to be. You know us. You are a part of us. And I think we’ve all worked too damn hard these past couple of years to drop the ball now. We’re able to change the world; go on a tour, explore the world and bridge the gap between K-pop and mainstream in a way that has never been done before.” I unexpectedly started to feel emotional, my eyes getting wet.

 

“We all signed a contract. We made a commitment to see this thing through, for better or for worse. But I don’t believe that means you have to sit back and be complacent. I think you should fight; for our success, for what Infinite could be. And don’t ever forget; that you have six people who are dedicated to fighting right alongside you. You’re not in this alone. I know you feel a sense of responsibility as our leader, but sometimes I think you forget that not just me, but all of the other members are there to help you when it gets hard.”  
  
I paused, reaching up to hold his cheek. “I know there’s… no way to know what the future will hold. Our lives are about to change forever, we’re about to be pushed to the limit and tested in a way we never have before. But I also know that you’re my soulmate, and there’s no one else I’d rather go through this with than you. I love you so much Sunggyu.”

 

“I love you too Woohyun. I don’t know what I’d do if you weren’t here.” He leaned forward, kissing me softly for just a second. Then he was wiping off my cheeks, kissing my closed eyelids. “There’s no reason to cry; don’t you know we’re going to see the world together?”

 

“Hell yeah we are.” I wrapped my arms around him to tug him back down to the bed. We bounced on the mattress together, laughing. “You know what this means, right?”

  
“Tell me.” Sunggyu’s eyes curved cutely into a smile.

 

I brought our bodies closer together again, so that every single part of me was pressed up against him. We were one, in our hearts, in minds, in our souls. I loved this man, and I knew how much he loved me.

 

The upcoming years wouldn’t be easy; I knew that in a way the odds were stacked against us. Coming from a smaller company, going through a transition in ownership, the burden of touring in foreign places, being away from our families and friends… there would be times when it would feel like too much, times when we would want it all to just stop. But I also knew that all it would take for me to center myself, to remember why I got involved in the crazy world that is entertainment, would be for me to look in Sunggyu’s eyes. Just seeing him smile, just knowing he was there was enough for me to keep going.

 

“The future is limitless; we can accomplish _anything_ , as long as we’re together.” I whispered, grinning harder than I ever had. Sunggyu was mine, he was _here_ , and we wouldn’t let each other ago for anything.

 

The love shined through his eyes as I spoke, and I knew he felt it too. This was what it felt like for dreams to come true.

 

“This is the beginning of the rest of our lives.” My heart was full, and I knew that no matter what life threw our way, together we would find our happy ending.

 

“And it starts right now.”

* * *

A/N: long live the OTPs!!!!  
  
thanks for reading ♡  
  
  



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